Can I See My Husband Before Marriage?

Muslim brides and grooms do not have to view each other through binoculars

November 29, 2006

This question is answered by Wael Abdelgawad, the AskBilqis.com and Zawaj.com Editor and Administrator.

QUESTION:

Dear Bilqis,

Can I see my future husband before marriage?

- Nadia from Morocco

WAEL ANSWERS:

Dear Nadia, As-Salamu Alaykum wa Rahmatullah,

Yes, of course you can see him. I don’t know how things are in Morocco, or if your culture is very conservative, but Islam allows the prospective bride and groom to meet one another and talk.

However, your meeting should not be in private, in other words it should not be just the two of you alone. You should meet in a public place with a chaperone, for example her parents.

You can talk about your ideas about life and your future, and your ideas about marriage, so you can find out if you are compatible for marriage and if you like each others’ character.

Both parties must observe proper rules of Islamic hayaa and etiquette. That means controlling the gaze, not touching one another, and discussing only subjects that are “ma’roof”, in other words nothing lewd or inappropriate.

If any readers have some additional advice for this questioner, feel free to post your comments below.

Glory to You Allah, we praise You, we bear witness that there is no God except You, we ask Your forgivess and we repent to You.

Best regards,

- Wael Hesham Abdelgawad, Administrator
AskBilqis.com Islamic Marriage and Family Advice
ZAWAJ.COM Muslim Matrimonials and More!

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Written by wael on November 29th, 2006 with 3 comments.
Read more articles on Islamic Answers 2006 and Marriage and Proposing Marriage.

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3 comments

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Get your own gravatar by visiting gravatar.com lehaska
#1. April 17th, 2007, at 11:22 PM.

Actually his parents being there or not doesn’t matter and isn’t important. The condition on which they can meet is that the girl’s mahram has to be with her. Mahram is a relative (father) passed puberty to whom marriage is forbidden in the Qur’an. She should also dress according to islam for the meeting. The point of the meeting is not to fraternise or anything, it is just to ask each other their views so you know what the other person is like.

Get your own gravatar by visiting gravatar.com Kotch
#2. April 24th, 2007, at 1:11 PM.

In the light of Islamic teachings there is no permission to meet, talk and share ideas about future life or any other talks with the future husband, Iam very sad to say that people only find Islam to make there exercise with sharias matter without the basic knowledge of Islam. I request M/s Bilqis to stop giving blunder fatwas

Get your own gravatar by visiting gravatar.com wael
#3. April 29th, 2007, at 8:06 AM.

Kotch, please do not confuse your culture with Islamic teachings. What is your evidence? Remember, we are not talking about a meeting just to fraternise, as lehaska pointed out, but to share views with the intention of discovering if the other person is a good marriage partner. The woman must have a mahram present, and both parties should observe Islamic rules of hayaa. What problem do you find with this?

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