salam malaikum

brothers & sisters!

I'm 14 weeks pregnant now. Is there any dua to ask for baby boy?

Asalamu Alikum

I have been married for 7months alhamdullah and have been very happy. Marriage is very sacred to me and I love my husband very much, alhamdullah. However my husband has always wanted children much more than me, but I always used to say that when we are capable of looking after ourselves and are stable then inshaa allah we will proceed to that stage.

However I can see that he isn't happy and that he is trying to make me happy and say its okay and that he will wait for me. But I don't want to make him unhappy so what should I do? I don't want my husband to not love me because I couldn't do something most of the women around the world do.  I want to make my husband happy as I only go to jannah if hes content with me.

please help inshaa allah

It is a PG concert with no drugs or alcohol, and monitored by security.

I'm 18 and I've never been to a concert before, and this concert I really want to go to isn't a dance-ish techno concert, so people won't be all drunk and crazy, I've been good all my life but music means so much to me and this concert means too much to me.

Will I go to hell if I go to the concert but do nothing haram (drinking, using drugs, dancing with the opposite sex etc)  when I'm there?

My mum & dad are muslims and also drink too they are divorced because my dad use to beat my mother. she had started when I was 9 at first I thought it was okay cause I didn't know at the time it was alcohol when I finally noticed I told her what she was doing was wrong and also tried to persuade her and say its haram but she would give me the answer that it is her life and God will judge her, she says she drinks because of stress & when I ask her what kind of stress she never seems to answer me.

Years went by and when I reached the age of 11 she had finally stopped alhamdulillah. But when I was 14 my dad came back and was now married to my mum again, everything was going fine until my mum told me the news that she was pregnant with my dad I was the youngest at the time with 4 older siblings. A sister, twin brothers & a older brother that are all in foster care because they don't want to live with my parents.

But everything was okay until I saw my mother and father arguing like always I didn't pay attention because I thought it be the same old arguments until I heard my mum screaming stop, I saw my dad repeatedly hitting her, I tried to stop and pull my dad away but never done any good. He grabbed a chair and was about to hit it my mum with it until I came in front and got hit with the chair, but that didn't stop my dad he went to a kitchen and grabbed a knife a went towards my mum... I went in front so he couldn't touch her because she was pregnant he tried to stab her but I put my hands in way and begged him to stop and thank God he did. I asked my mum to keep quiet and call the ambulance and police because my dad was mental at the time.

It's been 5months without and my mum had started heavily drinking again and I tried everything to make her stop but never worked right now I'm currently 15 years old.

~ Aminaa

Culture clash

Dear Brother/Sister in Islam, I'm a revert to Islam now that my oldest son is 18, he seems to have turned his back on what we've brought him up with, as parents. He has been at an islamic nursery andan islamic primary school,his secondary education was at a catholic school, I thought that would be the lesser of the 2 evils rather than a school without any faith.

He met his current girlfriend through blackberry. He's not ready or not interested in getting married yet. I spoke to the father of the girl whom I name Linda(not her real name)and said: my son has my permission to come to your house and spend time with Linda. My son was standing next to me during this conversation and out of fear of losing my son I reluctantly agreed. However, now it's been going on for about roughly 2 months and he starts leaving the parental home more frequently to visit Linda who lives in an other city in England.

I'm not sure what to do, my husband is suggesting to me that we have to ask Nori(not his real name)to leave the parental home and live by himself then hopefully,Incha Allah, he'll return to his senses. I'm hurt, confused and unsure as to what would be the best solution especially for Nori.

Please, don't turn my question down as it has turned our lives upside down.Even as I'm aware some Brothers & Sisters are in worse situations,may Allah help and guide us all,amin.

Ma Salaama,fiamanillah!!!!

Your sister in islam,

Maartje.

Hi, My boyfriend and i had broken up and while we were not dating i found out i was pregnant with his child.

I told him and now we are trying to work things out for for the baby. But now he is saying we have to get married before the baby is born because he is Muslim and because of his family. I just dont think if we did that so soon after we broke up that we would work out or be happy and i dont think it would be a good environment for the baby.

Eventually would be great, but not now... any suggestions?

- kyrstin

My wife is a non muslim woman who is big on traditional holidays she likes to celebrate all holidays even though I don't. What do I need to do in order to have peace in my home. Also she wants our three year old daughter to go to a catholic school which is the best school in our area. I have been deening for only two years now and don't want to push her away from islam but more importantly I don't want to commit shirk. I need some advice

-abduhl kareem salaam

Editors note: Two posts from this author combined here to provide more information to help us advise

1. Pregnant and not heard from my Saudi Boyfriend

Hi all, I wish I can receive good advice about the problem I have. I met my "boyfriend" two years ago in U.S. both were study in college and from the moment we met we fell in love, after 3 months we moved in together, in our apartment there were living with two of his cousins . For sure my family knows about him but as is expected his family doesn't know about me, but he says that an uncle and his sisters know about the relationship we have. I'm from Latin America, I want to convert to Islam  not because he demanded, and also is not because I'm deeply in love of him, is just because I've been learning about islam and I want to be an example for my child. On the other hand, he is from Saudi Arabia-Riyadh city, from a wealthy and very known family from all the people in Saudi Arabia and Middle East, and he says he loves me more than everything. Also he has an student visa.

However, 6 months ago I got pregnant and this news change everything because this is not legal in Islam and worse in his country. Now I'm in U.S. and he is in SA because the Eid but until now I don't get any good news from him, also its seems he disappears for days and then he just write to me message but until now he didn't call me. My family, specially my father give me his back, I don't have any support from them because he said "you decide to moved together and you were sure about the love he has for you". When he was here he said we are going to get married but not now, and if he doesn't want to be responsible for the baby he will run away long time ago, but his attitude now is showing me other things. I'm wondering if we can get married even if he doesn't have the 35 years old that his government required to marry a foreigner? For sure I want to give a home to my child with his father, but if the things doesn't change with him, what I have to do? resign myself to lose him and having my son without a father (because he is the love of my life) or be with him until he go back to SA in 3 years?

I hope to receive answers to solve my problem. Thank you a lot, Allah bless you all.

Saudi name for my baby and information about my options because her father run away (2 weeks later)

Salam Alaikum all,

I'm going to have a beautiful baby Saudi girl, and I wish to name her with a name from her origins but her father left us, so I need to chose by myself the name of my daughter. If you can provide me beautiful names with a lovely meaning I will appreciate... Even if my beloved daughter is out of wedlock is the product of a "great and pure love" at least the one I had for his father ...

This man and I were living together long time ago, and he just left to SA with the excuse of the Eid but he never come back again, the earth eat him. So, also I have been searching for help to get a child support for my daughter but so far I have not found anything, I don't know if the Saudi government can help me to find the father of my daughter or what I have to do. I'm just so worry and scare of the future of my baby because a child without father spend a harsh time in life, and many of my Muslim friends said that is not allow to leave your child alone.

Please help me because I'm desperate.

Thanks for read.

Ma'a as-salaama

-maria-us

Asalamualaykum,

I wanted to know about what happens to a woman once she has given birth; I know she can bleed to a maximum of 40 days.

I have also heard that the grave opens and closes for that woman in those 40 days, is this true?

Can someone shed some light on this please?

Jazak Allah.

Mrs Yousuf G.

One of my friend living in France had a problem. He had a sexual relationship with a girl and she ended up pregnant.

The girl was cheating and she has some other lover too. She started sex with other man and did not tell either that she was pregnant from my friend in the last week of their relationship.

The other man was not muslim he converted to islam and married the girl on both ways (nikah & legal in court too). But when the delivery occur it was 8 months after her new relationship that ended in marriage.

She told my friend she was pregnant from him only after birth but did not tell him at break up time, my friend wanted, now the new husband also know that he is not father because doctors told delievery was normal (9 months) and he is sure when he started sex with that girl.

So now my friend is in trouble and feeling himself a lot guilty that due to him a haram baby came into world and gone into hands of newly convert (according to him the girl was not practicing good, drinking alcohol, wearing short skirts  and no fasting in Ramadan etc should he go to court to get his baby?

What will be the status of the baby now according to Islam? Is the bringing up of the baby the responsibility of the mother only cause now she is married to another man? And she does not want father to even see/meet the baby? Should he leave that baby to the mother and new (step) father and think that the brought up (according to religion etc) & education is his responsibility?

~ Sikander_cgn