Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Muslim Boy Don’t Want To Marry

islam nikah

Can I remain single?

Salaam Walakum,


I  am muslim boy practicing Islam as much as I can, I know that marriage is sunnah and it's half deen.

My question is,  if someone don't want to marry and want to spend his life as single then is it allowed ? (Given that person in question will live life of celibacy knowing that in Islam there is no place for celibacy).

-Allah Ka Banda


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48 Responses »

  1. Salam Brother,

    You have already answered your question. Marriage is in fact Sunnah and half one's deen as you stated. Why the hesitation to marry in your future? Why would you want to be celibate? Marriage is a beautiful thing with hard work and devotion. Why is it that you feel that you would rather be single?

    Salam

  2. Narrated Anas bin Malik: A group of three men came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet asking how the Prophet worshipped (Allah), and when they were informed about that, they considered their worship insufficient and said, "Where are we from the Prophet as his past and future sins have been forgiven." Then one of them said, "I will offer the prayer throughout the night forever." The other said, "I will fast throughout the year and will not break my fast." The third said, "I will keep away from the women and will not marry forever." Allah's Apostle came to them and said, "Are you the same people who said so-and-so? By Allah, I am more submissive to Allah and more afraid of Him than you; yet I fast and break my fast, I do sleep and I also marry women. So he who does not follow my tradition in religion, is not from me (not one of my followers)."

    http://www.searchtruth.com/book_display.php?book=62&translator=1

  3. Salaams,

    Since you referred to yourself as a "boy", I take it there's a possibility you may be still young yet. Even if you feel this way now, given some time and maturing you may feel differently in the future. Most men do NOT want to be single, as it's a natural desire to have a woman to satisfy one's needs with. Maybe at this point in time, you haven't yet discovered what those needs are....but they will likely come soon.

    -Amy
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  4. Salamualaikum,

    Brother, why would you abstain from following the Sunnah? Do you have any reason for it? It was a practice of the followers of Isa AlaihisSalam as Allah Says the Quran that they adopted "Rahbaniyyah" which Allah did not ordain.

    But there were people who were extemely busy with their service to Islam, which kept them from having time to get married. Our Imam Muhammad bin Ismail al Bukhari, the author of Sahih al Bukhari did not find time to get married. He travelled thousands of miles to collect and verify one hadith, this struggle resulted in as Sahih al Bukhari. May Allah Bless him and fill his Qabr with Noor. May Allah Give ajr for each and every Hadith that he has collected, just for the sake of Allah. This in no way suggests that he did not follow the Sunnah. If you read his seerah, you will understand better in sha Allah.

    It is not a practice encouraged in Islam to keep oneself from marriage or practicing celibacy. This would lead to sin. Allah's messenger Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam also said that fulfilling one's desire with one's wife earns Allah's rewards as he avoided Haraam and chose Halaal.

    I strongly suggest you to get married when you are eligible

    Muhammad Waseem
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  5. There is nothing in the Qur'an that says you ''have'' to get married, but it is highly recommended because it completes half your deen and it helps both men and women trough life, for example men lowers their gaze towards other women because lust is one of shaytaans primary weapons and intercourse is something the soul desires, but having it outside marriage is a major sin. A rightful woman helps around the house, you can have kids and much more. Men helps women protecting them, help them financially, making them happy and more. But then again you don't actually HAVE to, you can still enter Jannah. But not getting married because of an act of worship then that may lead to sinning.

    If you sincerely never would have the desire to get married then you don't have to because if you would get married and not wanting to then that might only lead to you not loving your spouse and that leads to no good connection to each other, no ''fire'' between each other as they say and then divorce.

    According to that hadith, every man in Paradise will be given two “grace wives with transparent skins” and nobody will be left unmarried there (Bukhari, Badul-khalq 8; Muslim, Jannah 14). It is possible that both women are houris or world women, or one is houri and the other is a world woman.

    And Allah knows best.

  6. Brother Haris your response is really thoughtful.. Thank you 🙂

  7. I firstly like to thank Brother Harris for his comment. Your the first person who has said something locagical and not followed everyone like sheep.

    Keeping my life summary short, mostly due to financial constraints I was unable to consider marriage until I was past my 30's and way my life was, it was more of a struggle to get past the week then to think of spending time chasing women at college, uni, work, etc so I never even held a womens held in all that time, let alone do anything further. Coming from a Pakistani culture I had as they say all ready gone past my "expiry" date so as I hit 30. I didnt let this put me off as I had faith I will meet a partner to share this world and make ibadith with to our lord. I was introduced to a pathan culured girl in Pakistan who presented herself as very religious and came across as a god-fearing muslim women. I got married to her in Pakistan, which turns out was only allowed as she and her family wanted me to get them a british passport. The Nikkah was done BUT our marriage was not consummated (No Sex). The marriage ended within a few weeks so my question is "Technically" I have gotten married, so does that mean I have completed half my deen?

    Reason why I ask this is I want to follow the sunnah as I have tried to live my life following the commands of Islam to the best of my abilities. But now I have lost all interest in women and dont even look at women. The whole joy of getting married and all I had wanted afterwards has been shattered after my trust was abused like the way it has and sadly I have become very negative too. I dont want to marry now because I dont want the burden of having ruined some woman's life, she will not be happy with me because I am not able to trust another female again. I have no sexual desires and before anyone thinks its fresh wound. I have been with this view from day 1 of the annulment and its been 2 years. I am happy to stay single and live like this and just wait for death My only fear is I dont want to find out that I am not one of the believers because I didnt marry.

    I guess no point of my post, just sharing my pain to the world.

    Thanks for reading.

    Arfan.

    • I can relate to your story and why is everyone here so obsessed with following everyone else like sheep? My gosh are all men just growing money on trees these days? Yes that's right, lets not deceive ourselves, especially when it comes to marriage in this day of age. Women are looking not just for a man but also the check list. Does he have a house, how much money he makes, fancy car, wealth, head of hair etc. Its a joke and when all the party is over and for what ever reason she decides its not working or you feel like its not working, you have to sell your house, pay alimony, end up in a rental or move back with your parents pretty much loose everything you worked so hard for just to follow the correct way of religion as they say.

      My God. So far everything good that's happened to me has happened because I focus and work hard, I work two jobs, completing my second Masters Degree paying off a mortgage, taking care of my mother - and rely on myself unlike the rest of society who cant seem to live their lives without having someone else to complete them. God has answered all my prayers and I am sure if I ever want to get married again then it might happen but certainly not holding my breath for it. Live your life the way that it makes you happy and not by the way other people want you to.

  8. I was searching from few days about the same thing, since when I have heard about the hadees which challenges if man don`t get married they are not among beleivers, and since then i am very tensed about my situation currently i am 28 years old, my mother asked me to get married and I said i don`t want to , my reason behind not getting marries is that it financially i don`t think I can support someone, I don`t have time for any other person since I do office job also I like playing games so after work the small amount of time I have I want to spend it on my desires, also I don`t think anyone can feel happy with me since i am not a social person you can say I am a nerd type, I am quite islamic person I pray 5 times a day I haven`t talked any girl ( Unnecesarily) or made any girlfriends, but being a human being and a man I have urges and for those urges I found a way to calm them down temporarily , I know that way is not good either but its better then doing bad things publicaly.

    So my purpose of posting here is first to take that word out so I can feel a little bit better , secondly if any brother can understand my situation and can guide me if I am on right path or wrong cause it seems like no matter how much I have tried to solve this problem it became always worst for me and I get no concrete conclusions to it.

    • As far as I know there is no such hadith that says that a man who does not marry is not a believer.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

    • Assalaamualaikam

      If you decide you wish to marry, why not look for a wife who will share your interests?

      There are sisters out there who enjoy computer programming, sci-fi, gaming, etc. - who might well be delighted to find a husband who will understand and share their hobbies. Also, in the current financial climate it's extremely hard for a family to manage on one income (at least in some countries), so many sisters are realistically expecting to have to work at least part-time.

      Midnightmoon
      IslamicAnswers.com editor

    • Why not marry and then spend the small amount of time you have in playing games with your wife? It’s better to have a second player, you know?

      • Thank you for your kind answers but honestly idk why but I am very afraid financially about the whole issue, i am trying to convince myself but it seems it is not working at all its like I fear to ruin someone else`s life, cause as i stated I am not a social person and I am not financially good enough, Also marriage comes with lots of other responsibilities towards other person and i am seriously not good with responsibilities.

        • Why not put all your trust in Allah and then make a step forward, He will complete the rest for you. You may also want to use the little money you have to invest in a business or set up your own small business and then seek the blessings of The Almighty Allah. Also, as has been said above by the sister, " so many sisters are realistically expecting to have to work at least part time". What do you think about that? Maybe, you may want to consider that until you are able to stand on your feet. As for not being a social person, I was also like that but everything is normal for me now after marriage.

        • Thank you all for your great help, I thought a lot about it and came to the conclusion that I should leave it to Allah, if there is a partner for me she will find me if not then I am already ready for it, so for now I will stop worry about it and just put my efforts on my work.

          Thank you all a lot , you guys really helped.

          Also, i would really appreciate if someone can confirm that if anyone just want to stay single then is this okay in islam?

          • Alhamdulillah to know that you have decided to leave the matter to Allah.

            So now the next thing is to put much efforts on your work and look for a wife at the same time. Perhaps, the little that you have now could be able to pay for the Mahr, so you can then get married and then continue putting much efforts on your work, while trusting Allah. Allah will suffice you and your wife and family.

            As for your last question about staying single, it will depend on different situations. For example, if it won't lead you to haram, then you can decide not to marry, but marrying is always better (Sunnah), as the Ummah can only move forward if we marry and leave righteous children behind us to continue from where we stopped. Imagine, if every Muslim says, he is not going to marry, there would be not be a single Muslim left on earth for the future and therefore, the world would become corrupted completely, and Allah will question the whole Ummah about this on the day of Al-Qiyamah.

            Allah brought us to Dunya for two purposes:

            -1- To worship Allah.

            -2- To settle on the earth and develop it (this requires preparing for new Ummah that has both knowledge of the Dunya and Deen).

            But today, it’s so sad to see that many Muslims are sticking to the first purpose (worship) only, and then avoiding the last purpose.

            We need to see real Muslims who are devoted to the Deen and are at the same time experts in Dunya fields (such as Doctors, Scientists, Leaders/Politicians, Thinkers/Planners etc), as there is no entitlement of leadership for us without achieving the two successfully.

            All that cannot happen if we don’t get married and train our family and children in the Deen and Dunya.

          • Thank you for answering my question, but I am not clear on what haram you talked about.

            And as you said "the little that you have now could be able to pay for the Mahr" its not that simple actually getting married has lots of cost family traditions etc that must be taken care of nowadays , plus I don`t have any way to find wife the only way is to ask family and I have already refused to them and I am just putting my faith on allah that if marriage is written for me that it will come to me otherwise it will be the other way.

            Anyways please clear which is the haram thing that one should have to be away if he wants to be single

          • What I meant by "haram" is "zina".

            If one can live without being tempted to commit zina, then it is their choice to decide whether to get married or not.

            However, if one cannot live without being tempted to commit zina, then the person must work very hard in order to be able to save some money for marriage.

          • Thank you all and specially Issah for your great help, I really apprecitate it and it`s really good to see that we have peoples like you among us.

            Thank you all again

          • Thank you too Akhi, Umair. Please ask Allah in your prayers to keep me on the Deen, and to save me from riya and from the tricks of Shaitaan. Otherwise, we will be misguided and then misguide others too.

  9. i'm 27 and unmarried and i never plan on getting married either. I can't afford it, I can't afford to buy a house. But most importantly I don't consider myself to be deserving of a wife. I am not an attractive person so I do not believe it is possible for any human being to feel that way about me. Love and marriage happens to other people. So celibacy is clearly the way to go as far as i'm concerned. I like being on my own..the trouble i have now is that i don't want to live in society anymore coz i don't like all this talk of happy couples and everything..i want to live in the wild. Preferably Alaska or Canada. I can be happy out there all on my own.

    • Salam Bro Bobface,

      get married, because you really deserve a wife. It's not about the money. Your future wife should be practicing and chaste (had never neared to zina), because if someone marries you because of money, then this end in divorce. Because money is not a base for a marriage.

      The one, who doesn't deserve a wife is me....but this another story.

      • I have less than £100 in my bank account, what do you mean money doesn't matter? I can't even make enough money to live on myself.

        And what about physical attraction? no one will like me so what is the point? Im unappealing.

        I'm too used to being alone..cannot ever change that.

        • Salam Brother,
          Women do not always care about outer appearance or money, they look for other things when seeking an husband. A caring person, a hard-working man, a friend, those qualities you all can develop through Islam.

        • MashaAllah, you have £100 in your bank account, and you still live your life (eat and drink) without the £100? You are rich, InshaAllah.

          Allah provides for you now and He is aware of your state. He knows you are single and therefore He provides for you according to your state, and InshaAllah He will also provide for you much in your new state as a husband.

          The woman you are going to marry may be willing to share the little food and water with you, and to motivate you move forward towards your prosperity and success in life, InshaAllah.

          I have heard that, “behind every successful man there is a woman rolling her eyes”.

          Allah (s.w.t) says: “And wed the singles among you, and those who are fit among your servants and maids. If they are poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty. Allah is All-Encompassing, All-Knowing. And let those who do not find the means to marry abstain, until Allah enriches them from His bounty...”
          ( Quran 24: 32-33)

          You already have the means brother. Allah has blessed you from His bounty (£100). You may give the £100 as her mahr or defer her mahr for the future InshaAllah.

          Maybe you won’t know how Allah can be so Merciful until you try it InshaAllah.

          Just focus on improving your inner parts, and then put all your trust in Allah, while you make the little efforts you can. He will suffice you.

          You may want to see how morality earned this poor man a pious wife. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9xGaOE9qjk

          May Allah ease things for you, and may He grant you braveness! Ameen.

          • i appreciate the motivation but i have no car, no degree, no stable job ( i work part time on average 15hours a month), i have problems with self esteem and confidence and I also have nowhere to live. im living with my parents at the moment and i want to move out. I know i can't afford to at this rate. I cannot work without feeling incredibly depressed and suicidal. I work harder than most people and physically i have no problems working. my colleagues are surprised at how much work i do. I like heavy labor. but i always feel terrible inside. I cannot change my situation any more than just carry on working i guess. i'll be lucky if i ever have £1000. but money doesnt worry me that much. im more concerned about how unattractive i am to women. Anyway i just need to convince my mum that i cannot ever get married. she wants me to because i am the eldest. But i just need to be realistic and just tell her to forget about me.

        • But you, if your mum is saying you should get married, then it means you are okay since she is aware of your state very well.

        • Less than 100 is not thing bro. And if you had just 1 Bro this would be enought to marry.

          You can lose many thing and get them back like money and attraction.

          But you can't never revieve a life. Believe me if you want to marry than you will get married my dear Brother.

          Bro just get married and be happy with your wife which should be a person you like.

          And if someone doesn't like you than this person doesn't deserves you

          PS: Do you still go to School or whatever....

      • Salaam Brother,

        Maybe you should consider what the sister (Beggingforforgiveness) is telling you, she said "Women do not always care about outer appearance or money", and I have seen another sister telling you the same thing on another forum sometime ago. So why not believe this? The appearance may not be the main problem. The main problem would be about where you will sleep. So rather than thinking of your appearance, maybe you should be working hard to find a place to live, as you have said that, working hard is not a problem for you.

  10. Salam,

    Brothers who don't want to get married. I think you are expecting too much from the women. If you say you are unattractive then are you looking for an attractive women? Then that's where you are going wrong! A women also deserves to be attracted to her husband not just men.

    If a women is unattractive then she may not look for an attractive man. She will compromise on looks. And it is true women are far more deeper then men, they don't care much about looks and beauty is only skin deep, no body has control over how they look! A beatiful man or women is not better then an ugly man or women. What makes a person better is their personality, beliefs, morals and love and compassion they will give. These are controllable factors which should be used to asses a person.

    personality is earned beauty is not. Beauty is only given to you on a plate. So what has someone earned by being beautiful? Nothing! Nowadays people are much more clever then just looking at outer appearances.

    I would rather live with a man in a cave If he loves me and takes care of me and my family.

    So brother's work on your personality. Be the man that every loving women wants- caring, compassionate, faithful and yearning to provide for her and protect her.

    As long as she can see that you are hard working and ambitios to take care of her then your personality will shine through. She will be attracted to your inner beauty!

    Also brothers there are many unfortunate sisters in syria, egypt who have lost families and are alone in this world. They will not expect anything from you, e.g house, car etc etc. They are very pius women. Why not look into them. They will love you and be faithful to you more as you have helped them by giving them a family, love and basic food and shelter. You would have helped an orphan and get rewarded for it too. Someone truly loving you unconditionally is the most precious thing in the world.

    • I'm not trying to find anyone attractive in fact i'm not trying to find anyone at all. I agree with you totally that it isn't fair on the woman if the guy is an ugly bum and expects to marry someone who is better looking than him. Gotta be realistic. Money is an issue but i gotta admit it is something that can be worked on. Although when you do the math it is pretty daunting. I don't know where the rest of you live but here in the UK its quite expensive. Mind you nowhere is a utopia. But i think money is a secondary issue coz if a person is motivated and determined to provide then they will insha allah.

      ISSAH, my mom is only encouraging me to get married coz she thinks it might help motivate me..but i'm not convinced. i think the pressure will cause me to feel more suicidal. I don't like the idea of making someone else's life a misery and failing them so i wouldn't even take the risk. But again finance is a secondary issue..

    • Really motivating....:D

  11. I think marriage is overrated.
    Not because of men. But because women have killed the institution of marriage.
    Muslim women today are often following Western feminist ideology. A lot of Muslim women indulge in zina (natural/unnatural sex), especially in the westernized societies, while superficially wearing the hijab to act like they are modest. After marriage, sex becomes a transactional act (like prostitution), and men are nothing but remote controlled ATMs for their Muslim wives.
    The reality is that women have killed the concept of trust in today's world. That's why more and more Muslim men are choosing to stay single. With Muslim women indulging in premarital zina, marrying for superficial factors like status and money (which makes the nikah nothing but legalised prostitution), the marriage scenario in the Muslim world will surely follow western trends.
    You have places like Morocco where Muslim women travel to get hymen restoration to show that they are 'virgins' to their husbands. Even worse, is the rising prevalance of premarital oral and anal sex among Muslim girls in the Arab world, and those living in Europe and North Africa. In short, sexual hypocrisy abounds in the Ummah today. If Muslim women complain that Muslim men are not sexually chaste before marriage, then who are these men sleeping with? Of course women. And who are these women?
    In this age of pornography, men are bombarded with unrealistic expectations of women who expect them to be sexually skilled like sex machines. How will the poor guy know how to have sex 'efficiently', unless he has prior practice before marriage? Does he know how to have sex like a champion, when he's born? Of course not. As you see, female hypocrisy is the cause of male suffering always. A brother wrote here earlier how he was duped in a marriage where he was used only for a Green card.
    Marriage brings others problems as well. You have to support a financial parasite, not to mention of the horrors of divorce. Islamic jurists and Imams today suffer from the problem of idealism, which unfortunately does not have a place in the unfair real life world. There is no such thing as an ideal Muslim family today, that concept ended with the first generations of the Muslim world.
    In today''s world, every Muslim male has to be utterly pragmatic when choosing his wife. And definitely get a prenuptial agreement, which should be made valid in every Nikah. If your 'ideal' Muslim bride objects to the concept of a prenuptial agreement, then don't marry her. Protect yourself from marital exploitation, brothers. Lost time can never be brought back.

    • guest, your entire comment is bitter, one-sided and misogynistic. It's ridiculous to blame all the problems with marriage today on women. I would venture to say that men indulge in zinaa at a MUCH higher rate than women. It's men who patronize prostitutes, not women. It's men who have secret affairs outside their marriage - rarely women.

      I never heard of any women who expect their new husbands to "be sexually like sex machines", as you said. I think that's a product of your imagination and your own inferiority complex, perhaps from watching porn yourself.

      How dare you refer to women as financial parasites! Astaghfirullah. A good Muslim woman who cooks for you, cleans the house, raises your children, keeps you company, supports you emotionally and spiritually, is a parasite?

      I don't know what happened to make you so bitter, but your attitude toward women is disrespectful and unworthy of a believer. You need a lot of soul-searching.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

    • Assalam alaikum,

      Dear Brother, you are wrong on so many levels and the first person that you will destroy in this negative thinking is yourself.

      You have painted the picture of Muslim men as innocent, helpless creatures who work tirelessly all day long to come home to a woman who demands money from him and then and only then will be intimate with him. Where have you seen this? Did you witness this in marriages in your family? The idea is absolutely ludicrous. You talk about feminism, can YOU please tell me what a feminist is?

      As for women engaging in zina, YES, obviously they are doing that with men and your argument works against itself. You write: If Muslim women complain that Muslim men are not sexually chaste before marriage, then who are these men sleeping with? Of course women. And who are these women? So you blame Muslim women only? How unbiased and fair of you. (Not!)

      You write: You have places like Morocco where Muslim women travel to get hymen restoration to show that they are 'virgins' to their husbands. Men don't have to prove that they are virgins due to their physiology--so obviously such places only exist for women. And please don't suggest I am in favor of this, I am simply pointing out the obvious for why such places don't exist for men.

      In something you wrote, I'm going to just change some words:

      Even worse, is the rising prevalance of premarital oral and anal sex among Muslim boys in the Arab world, and those living in Europe and North Africa. In short, sexual hypocrisy abounds in the Ummah today. If Muslim men complain that Muslim women are not sexually chaste before marriage, then who are these women sleeping with? Of course men. And who are these men?

      As you can see, the reverse argument is just as accusatory and ridiculous OR just as correct.

      If female hypocrisy is the cause of male suffering, then male hypocrisy is the cause of female suffering. OR instead we could argue, hypocrisy is the cause of human suffering to be fair.

      As for the brother who was duped in a marriage for a green card, I find it rather interesting how you single that post out from the many others posted here by women who are duped by men.

      You write: There is no such thing as an ideal Muslim family today, that concept ended with the first generations of the Muslim world.

      I am sorry you feel that way due to your experiences--but that is all that they are, your experiences. They should guide you and help you, but instead you chose to become bitter, hurt and you still let the past define you.

      I hope you take time to reconnect with Allah swt and with ways that He wanted us to live--your words have challenged what our Creator wanted for us as if it was not attaintable, and that is simply not true. There is no point in proving it to you, because you are currently in a place where you won't listen to reason.

      May Allah heal your heart, Ameen.

      • Well I think its not just women to be blamed for this today as I see it , our so called muslim society has made all the good things difficult and all the bad and haram things are so easy and by very nature of human beings humans tend to like easiness that`s why marriage these days is not the same as it was ( as we know it ) and from all the above posts in this blog you can see that this is the main reason. So what I came to conclusion with all this is that money is everything these days and if you work everything out you will get down to one point "money" so if you have money and you can afford it then marry otherwise marriage is not for you. You can find many other things that you can do with your life and you will have to forget marriage maybe marriage will not matter for you anymore when you get yourself interested in other good stuffs in this world, that`s what I have concluded so far after thinking alot about marriage myself.

        • so called muslim society? I do not think it is wise to call a person a so-called Muslim, let alone an entire soceity.

          The problem for one person is money, for another it is looks, for another it is height, for another it location, for another it is family, for another it is their past, for another it is peer pressure....it is what it is. This is the Dunya, not Jannah....when we expect Jannah in the Dunya, we are constantly filled with complaints, excuses, and pain and we miss any beauty and true connections that we are supposed to make. This dunya was created for us to focus on our purpose which is to worship Allah in the way He is meant to be worshipped...which ultimately helps us to deal with each individual hardship that comes our way.

          • I agree with the part that it is not wise to call society so called muslum. Now the problem you mentioned which every human being have differently doesnt mean we expect jannah in this world these problems are out there and the part i dont understand is that allah has given us brain to think and if someone see that he/she have problem of money or any other problem you mentioned then he/she have a right in my opinion to act according to what he/she thinks will do better now from that if i think i cannot afford marriage or life after marriage dont i have a right to not marry? i know allah is the one who controls our rizk and life so is it wise to just sit on a road and faith that if my death has to come i will die otherwise i will live i dont think so that will be wise its all about taking precautions

      • Muslim male are facing problem due Non Muslim man & Non muslim women +Muslim women. 1st example of course beard as european ,amercian non muslim actor they don't usually keep beard so women all over world don't want their husband's to have beard at least 60-70% .2nd due paper currency muslim countries are all ready at below poverty rate like pakistan & bangladesh & many other countries so the financially muslim male are at low compare to european & American 3rd Many muslim male don't allow to work muslim women for safety & prevent from harsh world so european & American started using this tool & say muslim women are backward & with this muslim women also start thinking women who work have status ,value ,liberty,respect etc. Many people gives example to show allow of working of women of the khadija R.a so I will tell you that khadija R.a work when she was not married to Muhammad SAWS & work when she was not muslim + widow& after marriege with prophet Muhammad SAWS she did not work &she lived happily with prophet Muhammad SAWS for 9years after she die. So their are many problem which stands for muslim men due to extremely harsh world & so called Civilized world.

  12. I'm a muslim men and I want to live my life on my own. I don't need any women in my life. To be very honest I just think this marriage will destroy my life. I have no sexual desires. I want to help poor and needy and not just making money for my family and children's. I'm happy alone and I don't want to destroy my life. It's upto you how you want to live your life. In what way but, keeping yourself away from evil and satan( zina, any other corruption) you don't have a right to force anybody to marry someone. Yes, it's a sunnah without a doubt but it's not compulsory. Don't force anyone to marry.

  13. Aslam-o-Alaikum

    I am girl of age 31.

    • Wa alaykum as-salam. I removed the rest of your comment. Your questions are good questions. I'd like you to please submit your question as a separate post, and we will answer you in turn, Insha'Allah.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  14. Assalamualaikum, I just came upon this and found it very sad. Marriage no doubt is one of the blessings from Allah (sw) but the problem if you ask me doesn't lie in the Law of Allah (awj). Rather it is in implementing it. Honestly speaking, being a male it is easy to see that men today have trust issues with women whereas women have the same. But the solution lies in faith (imaan). However that imaan will not be possible without a very high level dosage of Islamic law. The call is ours to see whether we are REALLY willing to practice the Islamic Law of God and not twist the Quranic literature so we can take advantage. When it comes to that, I don't think anybody really cuts the deal. Just so we know, if people were REALLY that committed, they'd actually implement the Law, but no. What people really want is that men become slaves to their desires and women become servants of men's desires. The situation is not the real disease but the disease lies in the hearts. This is NOT good at all, since this is what the enemies of Allah (sw) want. The first step to take is to fight one's base desires and start with oneself. The next step is to work towards building a society that is not based on sick relationships. Argument will not really help, let's face it everybody in this world has basic needs. When people really commit to fighting at a spiritual level for the sake of Allah (sw), that is when they truly deserve to be believers who are marriage-material. Eitherwise, good luck marrying the guy with the big dollar bills and the girl who is perfect. These were my views, and I wanted to marry at a very early age just because I love the idea. However, owing to the way the dunya works I think that I'd have to end up searching the internet for people with similar problems like me! That is what I did. Allah (sw) Guide us ya akwani, Ameen.

  15. I think you should be fine alone. It.is not worth to marry women these days especially muslim women. Live to create if you cannot pro-create.
    Always smile and work hard. That's life
    I believe Allah will forgive people who remained single in life and did not commit major sins like black magic, adultery, backbiting, cheating and lying.
    Thank you

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