Islamic marriage advice and family advice

He used me and left for his mother

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Assalam-o-alikum to everyone ..

I am a 22 years old girl .. we met on facebook .. he is my uni fellow .. we spend our 2 years in relationship but now he left me by saying just my family (my mother and brother) disrespect his mother ..

i commit suicide for him, he call my mother, my mother got angered and shouted on him to become good man. he turned his phone off and after a week he said he got engaged and i don't dare to talk to him in university .. as we r cls fellows but now i am unable to face him .. i have to go uni for rest of 2 years ..

i loved him alot but he only use me physically again and again .. he said me that he consider me his wife so there is nothing wrong to do these things .. i never get him to penetrate his private area into my private area but he always use to go that specific thing in my legs or on that specific part ..

now he just left me that i disrespect her gifts and his mother said him to left me .. we both are in same section and class and i am unable to recover as i feel he will come back one day. but now my parents have rejected that no matter or what the situation is they will never ever accept such a boy who used you and now he is not even try to talk me about anything ..

plz suggest me what to do ..

i loved him alot but i can't leave my ALLAH for him. i stopped him to do the things related to my body so he left me .. plz pray for my forgivness that ALLAH TALLAH give His mercy .. i am a bad daughter and a very bad muslim girl .. i lost my purity just for him and he took not even a day to left me ..

plz someone help me .. i am dying .. i am losing hope ... i am not even in my senses .. i have to complete my degree at any cost but the situations are not in my favour .. i have lost everything ..

i thought ALLAH will forgive me bcs my sins are never big then His mercy and grace .. plz suggest me wt to do .. i am unable to forget him .. is he really loves me or not ??? He care me but he used me so badly and now he forgot everything ... how can i pure again .. i girl so shameful on her act .. i never want to lose him but he just left me .. left me .. and now i feel guilty what i have done with him phyaically .. we often do phone sex and whattsap sex as well.

i truly consider him my husband .. but he just left me for his mother .sometime i want to abuse my self for wt i have done for him but he never ever love me i am his lust just a lust...

i am unable to hate him. how can i consider that he will come back, he is a bad guy who took me far away from my ALLAH .. i always pray for my husband he took ALLAH's promise and put his hand on quran that he will marry me on any cost and at that condition i agree to do physical things with him bcs he love to do and my mistake i love him .. now he forgot everything each and everything ... plz pray for me i want right path :'( :'( :'

is there any solution about my situation ??????

Bareer


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8 Responses »

  1. Well being a guy i tell you we are fools. We make girls believe that we love them just to get into their pants. This is so common all around muslim countries unfortunately especially in south asia.
    As you said you love Allah, focus all your love for Him and forget about that guy. Intime these wounds will heal.
    He doesn't really care about you. How do i know?
    I used to be like that too and all the guys i kniw are.

    • "Well being a guy i tell you we are fools. We make girls believe that we love them just to get into their pants." - Speak for yourself. That's an abhorrent thing to say and especially to someone who is already feeling low.

    • "Well being a guy i tell you we are fools". not every man in this entire universe is like you. if you were one of those guys with filthy mind does nt mean that every other man is like you. why do u try to hurt her saying we can lie we can make you fool. so you are very clever but actually you people are hypocrite . you people think that you are successful but you are a failure ,a sinner, a big sinner according to islam and infront of Allah. so make plans. Allah has his own plans and would punish every other liar sinner and hypocrite till they leave hypocrisy and the way of shaitaan that you used to follow.

      these kind of men are from shaitaan army, they come, distract you. keep you away from salah and quran, waste your time, engage you in zina and inappropriate acts , make you a sinner, give you depression and hopelessness, make your iman weak and get happy to see you depress and away from deen and think they are more important than the religion. see in this way they become the army of shaitaan. a big sinner, full of deceit and hypocrisy.

  2. OP: i loved him a lot but he only use me physically again and again .. he said me that he consider me his wife so there is nothing wrong to do these things .. i never get him to penetrate his private area into my private area but he always use to go that specific thing in my legs or on that specific part ...

    You are lucky semen from his specific part did not go in your specific part. You could have become pregnant. It is good you did not let him penetrate his private area into your private area. You should not get into any relationship now, just get married. If you go back, he may convince you to do more.

  3. Assalamu'alaikum sister

    The fact that you feel guilty about the situation, and the physical side of things, is a sign that Allah is guiding you. If you are feeling guilty, then pray Salah and ask for His forgiveness, and make the intention never to repeat that sin again, Allah is most Merciful, He forgives even if our sins are big as the ocean. All these bad thoughts that you are having are from the shaytaan, he doesn't want you to repent and become closer to Allah almighty. Pray your salah regularly, put your salah before everything and everyone, and with time in sha Allah everything will be ok.

    Your sister in Islam

  4. A///A sister,
    Dont worry.. Allah is always with you. You believed that guy & now you are repenting but also now you are again on right track. Alhamdulilah. Just thanks allah. The resaons that guy is saying like an excuse doesnot really show any sign of love also. It was you who made the decision to be with the boy but everything looks clear to you now. O dear sister you are out of the foggy path now. Why should you be sad? Yes we make mistakes but our allah guides us by showing the light again. Should you not accept the truth? Ya you are in lot of pain for the the sins too yes its okay because you are again trying to walk on path of allah. Have faith. You are a good girl. Inshallah. You can stand by yourself again like a brave gal. May allah put mercy on you.

  5. you should be happy and thankful to Allah that Allah has saved from engaging in to more sins. its time for you to fulfill your duty as a Muslim and human and make tauba and promise Allah not to indulge in zina again.

    dont waste your time for a man who has already chosen a spouse for the future. he will come and waste your time lying that he loves you and use you for physical pleasure. in this way he will fulfill his lust and on the other way would become pious infront of her fiance that he is not like that just because he would fulfill his lust from you. and after marriage he would leave you and come after sometime to have sexual pleasure with you and you would become his mistress you see. he would tell his friends how he manages to have sex from wife and can keep girlfriends and would tell them and motivate them to do the sin he is doing.

    focus on your cgpa focus on your studies. your parents have payed the fees and these days education is much expensive . this session will not come again. you have only this time. improve your marks dont waste your time.

    dont go to the place where you both used to go . and keep your mind busy in books. you have 2 more years. focus on your studies and make tauba.

  6. sister, V R NOT INNOCENT, v know what is wrong and what is right,
    MOST GUYS HAVE THIS IN THEM, TRUST ME
    my own husband who didnt respect me in front of his family, was using me and my body
    thats what most guys do, they dont know what or how, ALLAH WATCHES AND KNOWS
    WE ARE GOING TO GET PUNISHED FOR OUR SINS, REPENT NOW AND FOCUS ON ALLAH ALMIGHTY TO HELP U:)

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