How can i tell my dad?!!! PLEASE HELP ASAP!!!
I am 22 years muslim (Sunni) lebanese girl… i’m doing my Masters in some university in Beirut… I met this French Guy, who is from Lebanese origin (his father is from a very well known Christian-Maronites family in lebanon and his mother French).. From the first day we met, we were with some common friends from university there was Chemistry between us, ever since and for 8 months now we hang out everyday and DARE to dream… He is a very good guy who has strong prinicples in life, he was very-well raised, highly educated, ambitious, self-made man… and any mother, or father, if religion is put aside, would dream to marry her daughter to him…
Things are becoming serious with us, and im living a very classy, innocent but real love.. i have met all of his families (his uncles were not that enthusiastic about me being muslim, but welcomed me… while his brothers, mother and father adored me and encourage us to be together) However, the really bad part is only my mom, some aunts and sister know about him… and my dad is a Hajj, very muslim religious… he would kill me, the man i love and himself before allowing this marriage to ever happend….
The guy is not religious, he is Christian on paper, believes in God, in Hell and Paradise and in doing good and bad… He wants a Civil Marriage in France basically so i can get the Nationality too and pass it on to the kids… However, i promised my mom that i won’t marry him until he converts and i do not want God to be mad at us… we are good people!
His uncles, from his father side (the well known lebanese maronite family) will make a huge fuss is he converts, however, his parents want their son’s happiness, and im not sure if when he converts whether my dad will actually accept him?
I know if my dad forgets about religion for one second he would want me to be this guy… but it is sadly not the case…
Please im feeling im living a double life… i know his entire family, he knows none of mine
I do not know if he converts whether my dad would accept him or not?? (The guy only speaks, French.. English and Italian too, but no Arabic).
We are both still doing our Masters… we wanted to wait and see if we stay together for 2 - 3 years and when we graduate and get good jobs may be then he can propose to me… but when the time comes i do not know how will i tell my dad he might kill me… The Daughter of the Hajj, will marry a Maronite Christian this would kill him.. (although two cousins of mine, from my dad’s side married Christian men who converted -on papers if i might add- to islam … it is not like im the first to do that… but my uncle is Religious but when it comes to marriage he accepts everything as long as it is in Halal and on islam style… while my dad cares about Religion word by word and family names and status…)
Please Help me, the man said if he ever converts it will be just on papers, and that his uncles will try to allow him to keep his lebanese id written on it Maronite… and we’ll have to do a civil marriage in France later for the Nationality… What is expecting him if he converts? will my rigid prejudice narrow-minded dad accepts… he is everything i want in a man … good morals, habits, ethics he adores me… his family despite everyhting loves me and treat me very well…
I wont marry someone else… i rather die… please help me set a reachable and reasonable plan that allows me to break the news to my dad… im tired of hiding!!! (the guy is always offering to go up and chat with my dad over coffee… obviously he doesn’t know that my dad can beat him up if he ever does that… my dad refuses we even have male friends he is very protective and conservative)… I’m so depressed… and DETERMINED not to marry but this guy or no one else!!!
Please help me please
Written by Determined on October 22nd, 2008 with
no comments.
Read more articles on Unanswered Questions and Can I Marry Him (or Her)? and Want to Get Married and Islamic Answers 2008 and Unlawful Marriages.
- [+] Digg: Feature this article
- [+] Del.icio.us: Bookmark this article
- [+] Furl: Bookmark this article