My Husband Doesn’t Want To Work!
I'm an American girl, 26, and I converted to Islam almost 3 years ago. My husband, 30, is from Jordan (Palestinian). I went to Jordan to meet him after 2 years of talking to him on the phone and internet. I fell completely in love with him! We got married in Jordan and I came back to America and waited a year for him to get a visa. I was in college before I met him and dropped out just to go be with him. Stupid I know! I paid for my ticket, and almost everything when I went to Jordan. I went over my credit limit on 2 credit cards, and all my money I had saved up from jobs was all gone from that trip.
It has now been a year since he hasn't worked, and he blames me for this. He worked a few jobs since being in America, but this past year he doesn't want to do anything. We are always late on our rent, we hardly ever have money for food, our car is falling apart, and I don't have much clothing or anything nice. He tells me, "since you aren't working I give up. We don't get anywhere if you're not helping me, so I'm not going to work either."
Before he came to America, he told me, "I want you to stay home like a queen" (haha). Then when he came, he didn't want me working. I didn't work for 2 years, and after that he started putting me down- telling me I was a loser because I'm not working. So I started looking for work, but when you haven't worked for 2 years no one wants you.
He is always calling me names, telling me I don't know anything or calling me stupid. I cry almost every night! I started school at home because I can't afford to go to college now, but he stopped making the $50 payments for that-he tells me to get a job. I asked him for $2 for something and he told me again to get a job.
He makes me feel so bad I can't stand it. I asked him for a divorce because he doesn't want to work or give me a chance to find work, but yet he keeps telling me go ahead and do it (work). Doesn't he have to divorce me in Islam? What should I do?
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