Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I am a Roman Catholic man who may want to marry a Muslim woman, is it possible?

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I am a non-practicing Catholic, but I really don't see myself converting to another religion.  I have interest in a Muslim woman and she has interest in me.

I've told her that I am not opposed to her religion and if we decide to get married at some point, I would not interfere with the children being raised Muslim, her prayers, Ramadan, etc.

I consider myself a very open-minded person.  She is a recent convert to Islam from Catholicism and we share the same cultural background and language.

Would I be able to marry her eventually?

Thank you!

~ indoubt

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11 Responses »

  1. Salaams,

    In Islam, Muslim women may only marry Muslim men. Since she is new to Islam as you say, she may not even be aware of this. If she were to marry someone who was not Muslim, her marriage would not be valid and for her it would be the equivolent of living in sin. The only way you or anyone else from another faith could marry her is if her groom became Muslim.

    I'm sure there are a lot of things that she is still learning about her new faith, and some of the most important things she should focus on at this time are the manners (adab) required for her as a single woman interacting with other men (single or otherwise). It sounds like you are a good friend to her, so perhaps you can encourage her to do more research into her faith and the practices we keep in Islam, so she can have a better understanding of what is permissible for her and what is not.

    -Amy Editor

  2. The eminent Muslim scholar Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, in his well-known book, The Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam:

    "It is haram for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man, regardless of whether he is of the People of the Book or not. We have already mentioned the saying of Allah, "...and do not marry (your girls) to idolaters until they believe..." (Al-Baqarah: 221)

  3. Haram means "forbidden". It is haram for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man means Islam forbids Muslim women to marry non-Muslim men. The only solution is you must revert to Islam SINCERELY so that you can marry a Muslim woman. To know the beauty of Islam is to study Islam sincerely and open-mindedly and there are many Christian misisonaries who revert to Islam after they have studied Islam sincerely and open-mindedly.

  4. Sorry dude , though u may be open minded or will not interfere in your wife religion and want to raise child as an muslim ( as u say ) , but u can't marry a muslim girls even though she is a revert but now a muslim
    U have to revert to islam to marry her
    Its not like u say the shaddad and marry her while inside u r a non-muslim it shouldn't happen like that

  5. Brother indoubt,

    Please do not marry this muslim sister. Please kindly forget forming any type of premartial relationship with her. Next time if you happen to see her, tell her muslim girls/women at any circumstances are not allowed to marry non muslim man and evn if she performs all the islamic marriage rituals with a non muslim man, the marriage according to islam will be consudered as VOID, sin.

    If she be in any doubt, then please tell her that you got this advise/information from here.

    May Allah (swt) guide this new muslim sister to His path and May Allah give you the realisation of truth- Islam and the strength for you to accept Islam sincerely.


  6. Actually I would encourage you to learn about Islam yourself. You say that you are open minded, then just study it a little. Catholicism in its' tenets are not that far from Islam and the biggest obstacle to overcome would be the Trinity, which isn't that difficult when you study about it in-depth from the point of view that you have now.

    If you are neglecting your religion, then maybe that is a sign to look into something else. It's just a thought, but it sound like you may be on that path. Yet, don't do it for her, but for yourself. Give it a try and you just might find some better understanding, too

  7. please don't marry with muslim girl first you be muslim

  8. Hi,

    I am muslim girl and I myself not convinced with fact that muslim women àre not allowed to marry noñ muslim. Its not stated in the holy book nor said by Mohammed.. Its ijtihad from scholars only. However, if you shall read more and analyze more with the given reason of why not a muslim girl marry a non muslim.. I can also tell the same reasons that "might" affect muslim woman would affect muslim man who will marry non muslim woman. So the whole concept is not fair from A to Z. Give me more logical reason rather than being eye folded and following anything said to you blindly.

    • maryam, you are wrong. The prohibition against marriage of a Muslim woman to a non-Muslim is in the Quran and is quite clear:

      "...and do not marry (your girls) to idolaters until they believe... Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the fire but Allah beckons by His grace to the garden (of bliss) and forgiveness, and makes His signs clear to mankind; that they may receive admonition." (Al-Baqarah: 221)

      And Allah said concerning the immigrant Muslim women: "Then if you know them to be Believers, do not send them back to the unbelievers. They are not lawful for them (as wives), nor are they lawful for them (as husbands)." (Al-Mumtahanah: 10)

      No text exists which makes exceptions for the People of the Book. Hence, on the basis of the above verses, there is a consensus among Muslims concerning this prohibition.

      As for Muslim men marrying non-Muslim women, it is allowed by the Quran but is not necessarily recommended. A pious Muslim woman should always be the first choice. As for the reason why it is allowed, Allah knows best. It is not for us to question Allah. However, I could point out that most societies are patriarchal, meaning the husband rules the family. Therefore the husband could exert influence over the wife in matters of religion. For example, it's common for women to convert to Islam to marry a Muslim, but not so common for a man to convert to marry a woman.

      In any case, the religion is clear on these matters.

      Wael Editor

  9. It is possible for Christians and Jews to be believers. 3:110, 3:113-115, 3:199, 4:46.
    And believers should marry believers. 2:221
    So all the people of the book can marry all the people of the book as long as they all believe in one God who is supreme and has no partners.

    2:221 says men and women should marry believers. And the other lines show that it is possible for Christians and Jews to be believers. So regardless of whether it is men or women, Muslims/Christians/Jews can marry each other as long as they are believers.

    • Mahdi, your assertion is incorrect. The term "mu'minoon" or believers is only used for Muslims. The People of the Book are only considered mu'minoon if they accept Islam; otherwise they are still mushrikoon and kuffar, though with special status.

      Take, for example, the first ayah you mentioned, Quran 3:110:

      "You are the best nation produced [as an example] for mankind. You enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong and believe in Allah. If only the People of the Scripture had believed, it would have been better for them. Among them are believers, but most of them are defiantly disobedient."

      What does it mean when Allah says, if only they had believed? It means if only they had accepted this Quran and Allah's Messenger (sws) and entered into Islam. "Among them are believers" refers to those who accepted Islam. "Most of them are defiantly disobedient," means, most of them rejected Islam.

      This is obvious. If their profession of Christianity or Judaism was enough to make them believers, then Allah would not say, "among them are believers, but most of them are defiantly disobedient." They would all be considered believers. And if they were all believers, then why would Allah call upon then (in other places in the Quran) to accept Islam? The Prophet Muhammad (sws) was a messenger to all of the worlds. He was sent not only to call his own people to Islam, but the Christians and Jews as well, for they corrupted their books and became lost. They are NOT considered believers.

      That is why, only a few ayahs later, Allah says, "They have been put under humiliation [by Allah ] wherever they are overtaken, except for a covenant from Allah and a rope from the Muslims."

      In other words, they are condemned by Allah unless they take this rope which is extended to them, which is the rope of Islam.

      You have to take the Quran as a whole and in context, and also in context of the Sunnah, for the Messenger of Allah (sws) was sent to explain the Quran and to show it in practice. There are many hadith in which the Prophet (sws) describes the character of a mu'min. In fact, a mu'min is considered to be even above a Muslim, for Allah chastised the desert Arabs in the Quran, telling them that even though they had come into Islam, faith (imaan) had not yet entered their hearts.

      There was no example among the early Muslims of a Muslim woman marrying a non-Muslim. It is simply prohibited in Islam. No one questions this except people who are misguided and astray.

      Wael Editor

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