I am married to an addict
I need some good islamic advice regarding my marriage. This is my story;
I have been married for a few years and have one daughter. Soon after the marriage discovered husband was a cocaine addict. Living with an addict is like being tortured slowly, I knew that he desperately needed help and he also genuinely wanted help as he did not actually enjoy the addiction (he had side effects of psychosis & hallucinations when he used). He went to rehab and then relapsed after 3 months.
Then last year he went to rehab again. Everything was going well, alhamdullilah, until: part of his recovery programme is to complete the 12 step programme. This is basically going through each step with honesty. Step 4 consists of writing about sexual experiences that have harmed other people.
By the grace of god I was doing something and his book just opened on a page which had my name on it, so obviously I read it. I then discovered last year before he went into rehab he had been sleeping around. I had no idea, because despite his addiction I always thought he was a faithful husband (I know naive).
So I confronted him & eventually he admitted it. Later on the same day he took drugs, after 9 months of doing so well. He was also away on business at the time. He has denied using obviously, but I just know. He still wants help and is willing to work the programme. He prays most of the time and turns to Allah (swt) to guide him onto the right path.
I do believe that his addiction is a disease that he trying to overcome and I obviously am very hurt about his cheating ways.
I just do not know what I feel anymore or what I should do. Can i forgive him for the unfaithfulness?? Can i carry on standing by him through his recovery, despite his relapse? He does also have very good characteristics despite all these flaws. We are both in very good professional careers.
Please my brothers and sisters in islam think very carefully about this one, insha'Allah any wise/comforting words will be much appreciated and will be a solace through this hardship.
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