Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Khula due to husband hiding facts about himself

bad love

Assalamalaikum brothers and sisters;

I under very distressing condition have taken khula from my husband as he hid his medical condition right from the start of the alliance.

We used to talk almost every day after the alliance was formed until a few days before nikah.  He even went to a specialist for a checkup before marriage, but did not adhere to his instructions, which was discovered later after nikah.  He even was aware of what the consequence would be of being unable to consummate the nikah.

Due many other hidden facts, as a result I just was unable to have good relations with him due to mistrust.  He totally loved me, but I felt as if I would not be able to respect him or love him, but rather would manipulate his situation to benefit me in terms of making him agree to whatever I want to, so I parted ways with him though nor he nor I were ready for it, but his elders and mine decided it was better to part ways.

Though I did make a lot of dua to save my marriage and did istikhara, but eventually khula took place, though I wished something would stop it from happening at last moment; even though I was posing as to be a very strong person to the world during this devastating scenario in my life.  After on, I felt apart and broke down emotionally and now I am unable to look into eye myself due to the fact that I could not be patient enough with him and as I shamed him in the society and now I have guilt feelings.

Is it really permissible for me to perform another nikah with him, as I am totally advised against it knowing fully that maybe or may not be we ever will be able to have conjugal relationship.  People even told me that my relation was haram before and would be haram if I knowingly enter fresh nikah with him.

I am totally confused.  Because of one betrayal, I do not know whether I will be able to accept another man in my life.

Is conjugal relation a very integral part of nikah?

myrtle


Tagged as: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

4 Responses »

  1. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that intercourse is a very integral part of nikah. Nikah/marriage is established to protect us from immorality (zina).

    You should know that if you stay with this person, you'll be putting yourself at risk for temptation of adultery. Right now, you're only thinking of this situation but there may come someone you really connect with later.

    I suggest you stay divorced.

  2. OP: He even went to a specialist for a checkup before marriage, but did not adhere to his instructions, which was discovered later after nikah. ...... He even was aware of what the consequence would be of being unable to consummate the nikah..Is it really permissible for me to perform another nikah with him, as I am totally advised against it knowing fully that maybe or may not be we ever will be able to have conjugal relationship. People even told me that my relation was haram before and would be haram if I knowingly enter fresh nikah with him...

    You have not mentioned what medical problem your ex has? What instructions your husband did not adhere to? Most likely he won't be able to have a sexual relationship with you..

    You may have to do a halala to remarry your husband.

  3. I am sorry you are going through this situation.May Allah give the strength to withstand this situation.

    If your husband can not consummate the marriage for PERMANENT, then I do not see why you should be sentence yourself to the consequencies. The purpose of marriage include satisfying your sexual needs, and if this is not going to happen, what will you do?Going Haram? Speak to a religious person among your community.

  4. you have to share more about what problem is and what the specialist suggested for treatment. There are rare cases of hormonal disorders like Gynecomastia. It is characterized by swelling of the breast tissue in boys or men, caused by an imbalance of the hormones estrogen and testosterone.

Leave a Response