Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I lost my virginity and I want to repent.

 

Assalam O Alaikum,

I am 16 years old and recently (about 2 weeks ago) I lost my virginity to my boyfriend (who is also Muslim). I never planned on losing my virginity before marriage. Even though I have been with him for only four months I love him very much and I know this may sound stupid but I have a feeling we are going to have a future together. The moment we had intercourse I was scared and regretted it. I told him to stop then I don't know why, but I started to cry. I was confused and I didn't know what to do, the entire time I was thinking about the sin I had just committed but, afterwards we continued to do it.

I just don't know what to do at this stage, even though I am guilty for having intercourse before marriage I did it again anyway afterwards. I am scared that my repentance won't be sincere enough even though I do regret it and want to follow the right path, I keep repeating my sins. I can't control myself.

Please help me,

Amaal95.

 


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134 Responses »

  1. Salaam Amaal.

    You will continue committing this sin as long as you continue seeing him this way. Search for the story of Barsisa - one thing leads to another and by meeting him alone you are putting yourself in a vulnerable situation. You need to cut off any unislamic contact with this guy. So you should not be meeting alone without your mahram present. This includes talking on the phone. Also there should be no physical contact. When a man and a woman are alone, shaytaan is the third so this is very important.

    Also one of the conditions of repentance is that you leave the sin. It is not sincere repentance if you are asking Allah to forgive you and continuing with the sin. So leave the sin (leave this guy, cut off unislamic contact) and then make sincere tawbah. Make the firm intention not to go near the sin again.

    Allah swt warns us in the Qur'an: Do not come NEAR to zina.
    { And come not near to the unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a Fahishah[i.e. anything that transgresses its limits (a great sin)], and an evil way)

    [Surah Israa' 17:32]

    So in future avoid anything which may lead to zina (casual friendships with opposite sex, physical contact etc)

    Ask Allah sincerely to forgive you and remove your sins from your book. It is Ramadan now and the gatesof mercy are open so use this opportunity.

    You may find it difficult to leave him, but in time your feelings will fade. Alternatively if you are both serious about one another ask him to approach your family the correct way and ask for your hand in marriage. Be willing to compromise though. If he makes excuses or refuses you are better off without him as he is not serious. Whatever you do decide whilst you are unmarried any contact with non mahram males must be within islamic bounds.

    “Allah the Exalted said: “O son of Adam! As long as you invoke Me and plead to Me, I will forgive you whatever you have committed, and I will not make much of it. O son of Adam! If your evil deeds reach the borders of the sky, and then you ask Me for forgiveness, I will forgive you. O son of Adam! If you bring forth the earth full of errors, then you meet Me while you do not associate anything (or anyone) with Me, I will bring forth for you its full of forgiveness.” [At-Tirmidhee (Shaikh Albanee rendered it as Hasan)]

    Sara
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  2. Assalamu alykum.

    Amaal,few years ago i was in the same situation as you are presently suffering,i had a boy friend and even i did that biggest sin which i never thought of going near to that,we were physically close but one day without taking my permission he just....you can understand,when the blood came i was shattered into pieces,cant express that feeling,so guilt so ashamed,after that also he convinced me that, there will be no problem after marriage as the coating layer of the vagina will again come and you'll bleed when your husband does the same,i was a fool and continued.....for about 12 times i remember,with no feelings just for his happiness because it was always painfull for me....

    Second thing i did was i shared this feeling of guilt to my ex boy friend as he was a hero for me for me he was so perfect that he can never go wrong,as we were not in relationship i discussed and cried out of repentence,he asked me everything on phone it was my internet relation as i never met him,and just saw him in pics and cam.....you'll never beleive i was engaged that time,the internet boy hacked my ID and contacted my fiance 5 days before my wedding through mail,he said everything to him that she's not virgin you'll realise on your first night,when my hubby came to know this he called me to chat online to show the mails,...i fainted for about 3 minutes my sis was there with me,i thought now i am going to die my life has come to an end,i convinced him but there was a doubt in my hubby mind as it should be....

    i prayed to my Lord Allah...Al Rehman, Al raheem prayed in tahajjud cried promised to my god i'll never repeat that sin please help me with my new wedding life.Where i was about to start a new life,a lifes end was brought infront of me.i strongly feel God forgived me because,my hubby didnt even looked am i bleeding or not it was dark,he didnt even bothered to put lights on to check my virginity,...YES it was a miracle for me,my hubby didnt ask a question,i thanks to Allah swt for all this,and my hubby is so loving and caring that if i searched that kind of a person with a lamp in my hand then too i'll not get,because only me and my God knows what i was and what i deserved...

    Dear Amaal, i wanna say stop all that, its jahannum in this world,its good,you both are planning to get married but whats in your destiny you dont know,just feel as if you were me, and if Allah didnt give you a chance your life would be a hell,ask for repentance to Allah,he will listen if you stop that sin and never repeat that,just for the satisfaction of your NAFS dont spoil your deeds and your life,its Zina and it has ill effects coz its haram,you'll come to know abt. its side effects today or tomorrow if you didnt stop.

    I Pray Allah to give hidayath to all of us and keep away from shaitaan,coz he's our open enemy as said in Quran.
    Allah hafiz.

    • Ur story is very inspiring and gives hope that Allah will always conceal and forgive us

      • But Must remember .. Never ever Hurt your Hubby ... Always be recessive and make him feel that he is a dominant chrachter ..... because as being boy I can understand ... I can feel how hard and difficult is to sacrifise in this case .... Salute to your Husband's love.
        Never leave him

    • Assalamoualaikoum

      Thanks Laibah for sharing your experience. It's really inspiring.

      I am in the same situation as you were, the only difference is that i told my fiance the truth, but still i want him to experience how it feel when you have sex with a virgin, cause unlike me he never had sex.

      their is an ayaat which says; Impure women are for impure men and impure men are for impure women. Pure women are for pure men and pure men are for pure women.” (Quran, 24:26)

      Then how come he is pure and i'm not. sometime i ask myself do i really deserve him. is it not unfair to him?
      I want to ask allah my virginity back.

      • i am also in the same boat..a=i was engaged in sexuality with her boyfreind...i loved him too musch...but he was fraud....i pray that my husband did not give divorce me thats y i dont want to marry .....i m very sadddddd :((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( i repented on my sin... i m very bad girl :((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((9 Allah plz forgive me........plz any one console me plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz i m v worried

        • What Did u Get After it ?? Nothing Just u Lost ur Respect !!

        • Asalamualikum..!!!! plzz contact me becuse i m also in same boat i loved a girl who betrayed me and hurt me very much...!!! i knw your story and i knw the truth abt u so i want to marry u becz i knw jaisa maiany kia hay waisa hi mje milay ga so... but i m happy for that atleat i knw the truth abt u ... i want to get marry with u ... contact me at *****

          • Fawad, we do not allow the exchange of private contact information, or marriage proposals on our forum.

            Wael
            IslamicAnswers.com Editor

        • Hey... Dont worry.. Marriage is also a part of islam... U should get marry and complete this part of islam too... This might be the reason Allah forgives ur sin... Atleast u r guiltily and u regret it ... And Allah forbid even if u do get divorced remember its a test from Allah and Allah only tests the people he loves... So don't worry, get married and live a great life In sha Allah 🙂 and trust me i know how you feel because i was raped and i dont know whats going to be in my future but i believe in Allah and although it is not my fault i still fell very guilty and ask Allah for forgiveness everytime... In sha Allah u will find a great guy just believe in Allah

        • Dear sis my Allah forgive u if u feel really shame so pray for your self next time you naver done thats kind of mistake and dont worry u will be marrid thats my pray for you sis

      • You can't just have sex with anyone and then just wish for virginity

    • i want to ask somethng?

    • Ok, that's all fine and all, but why not just disclose to the man you ate marrying? What if that was important to him? You're essentially cheating him. Repenting to God is great, but you're not hurting God with you're omission, you're hurting the man you are about yo marry. He might not even care if you tell him, which is great, or he might not marry you. Still better than lying or not owning up to what you did. That's part of repentance and respect for your husband and towards God that he gave you a man like this.

      We're "strong" enough to ask God for forgiveness yet we can't be strong enough to disclose this matter to a man who may have certain expectations? My wife did this to me, and now we're getting divorced. Had she told me before marriage I would have married her and not even cared. But it's the betrayal. If you're truly a believer of God then you know lying (even by omission) is a sin as well.

    • Actually you have cheated your husband and told him lie .
      He has asked you about it and you lied .How come you lie to some one like this ?

      Though you are not supposed to confess your sins but when some body asks you about it you are not supposed to lie but simply back out from it .

    • God bless uh both.

    • hello
      i m sory,that happen with you,you should not do that.

    • i have the same problm....mj sy galti hoi bot bri galti apni b.f k sth sex kiya i was only 18,now i m 21 or ab mjy apni galti ka shidt sy ehsas hy .mai namz may roti hon,shadeed depresion may hon,mjy kch smh ni ata mai kya kron,mri niyt saaf hy mai maafi mangti hn pury dil sy .promis b krti hn k kbi wo sb again ni kron g,lekn phir b aksr mjy lgta k Allah mj sy khush ni hy...mjy apni wedng nt ki tension rehti hy,Allah pak ko mn kesayy khuah kron kesay maafi mangun, or kea ye baat sach hy k zina qarz hy kea mjy apni fianci ko sachh btana chaye ? Allah ko apny sy rAzi krna chahti hn mn...............ab mn apni norml lif guzar ri hn lekn mjy khuda ka khof hy ,futur ka dr hy wedngg nite ka dar hh

    • Same thing happened to me... before 8 years ago amd at that time i was 16 or 17 and i loved a boy and then he left me for and i cried for many years at nights and cry for forgiveness from Almighty... after that i didn't sex but some times that feelings comes and i start watching porn and fingering and all that ... than i feel guilty about this act and ask for repent but after some months same thing will happen and i tried to control myself but i can't... afterwards i feel ashamed and afraid about my marriage life and hubby... i also pary for my marriage but this is another issue because i am younger than my all siblings. Now it's my turn but it will take 1 year to get married... will Allah forgive me ? I do pray 5 times Qur'an and all that... since 8 years i didn't have physical relationship with anyone.. will Allah forgive me???

  3. This is why parents need to step in and get their children married off young, so they can make that haram action halal.

    Either marry the boy and make it halal, or don't marry him and lose all communication with him.

    If you're old enough to do the deed, you're old enough to get married.

    • salam

      im 20 years old and ive been mentioning marriage since i was 19. people think im crazy, "to young". even grown family members, aunts, uncles. the main message is live your life then get married, my question is define live your life? youd think after seeing their kids rebel, go off with haram relationships, my self included in the past, they would wake up. at 20 years old your a full grown man, in my case anyway. i dont see how i can be any more of a man. i have a full time job, i go to school full time, i own a house alhamdulilah. some even say i grew up to fast, so what i should pretended to be young for couple more years?

      as for this girl, may allah giude you, best i can come up with without being harsh.

      Best message to give is get married as soon as possible for the right reasons, move on in life. as for "living your life" youll do that when yu get married.

      Peace

      • Those people who say you are too young need to think carefully before they speak. It's these same people who will complain when their sons and daughters end up committing sins when they could quite easily have helped them avoid them.

        Brother get married and use an Imam if necessary, sometimes those closest to you are often the least bit interested in someone else's well being.

        I wish you all the best, May Allah give you a good and honest wife.

      • At the age of 20 if you are working full time and own a house mashAllah then I can assume that you are mentally mature and stable to make a marriage work.

        Speak to your parents kindly and explain to them that if you are mature enough to man up to your responsibilities (much faster than guys your age) you are therefore responsible to get married also.

        I’m glad you want to get married sooner rather than later and don’t think like other guys your age who want to “party first and work later”.

        -Helping Sister

      • Salam-o-alaikum,

        Brother I think if you are able to and from what you have written, MashaAllah you seem to be. I think you should get married asap. And you are not crazy in thinking to get married early, inshaAllah you'll be doing a good decision.

        Instead of wasting your life's precious moments which you'll never get back and exposing yourself to so many sins. Get married ASAP. I can chip in money for sweets for editors 😉

        May Allah guide us all.

        • Salams

          Thanks guys for the motivation i like that wallah. I just wish people would wake up, open their eyes a bit wider, and see the bigger picture. Islam made me the person i am, it took me from the haram life style to the halal life style at an early age alhamdulilah, and Islam is what helped me mature faster.
          Inshallah i will find my self a good Muslim girl to spend the rest of my life with.
          May Allah guide us all on the straight path ameen ya rub

          Peace

      • well,what if a loose my virginity with a guy before marriage but i marry that boy later on???
        mean...
        i was in a relationship,i had s** and marry that same boy !

  4. Just marrying the boy will not make all that happened hallal,after nikaah it will be halal but the deed done before marriage is punishable,wether they become husband and wife in future but the thing presently happening will be always called Zina ,ask for forgiveness to Allah,do not repeat Allah is ghaforrur Raheem.

  5. Muslim brother,

    you'r really lucky you were on hidayath at an early age,the mistakes kill us from inside we feel guilt.
    MAy Allah forgive us,insha Allah you'll get a good pious women,as it is said in Quran,HE swt has has made pairs,for pakh men a pakh women...he is the most Justifying you'll get a good wife insha allah

  6. Dear Laibah and the Victim sis,

    i've the same problem, relation with some internet guy, but done nothing liek dat, no physical relations with him or any1 else in the world............but my virginity is lost due to some other reason, i duno what will happen now? every1 can't be as lucky as Mrs Laibah... that guy forced me to meet but i din't and my relation is broken up just due to my denail as i know he'll force nme to commit sin.
    Now me husband won't believe me k i've neva let any1 touch me, but he'll just doubt on me. plus i m not sure about my virginity wastage, what can be done??? plz help

  7. Salam can't mention.

    You are right sis not everyone is lucky,Alhumdulillah i am the one,but insha Allah you will also be lucky as i am.its good you didnt meet the guy bcoz the sin was going to happen as shaitaan is the third one when a male and female are alone,its good the haraam relation has coem to an end,Allah knows your TAQWAH,he'll help.
    i can understand by what yours is lost,you didnt mention you are going to get married soon or what,i am an housewife married for last two years and has a baby delivered normally,personally i would say if a female is not wet during intercourse then both can feel the tightness,after having a baby also my hubby can feel tightness when i am not very wet,its natural to get excited but try to distract your mind on first night to do not get wet,secondly pretend that you are really really hurt that time,bleeding is not imp coz it does not happen with every one,God forgive me i am teaching you how to lie but i can feel the fear and pain of your heart thats why telling u like a sis...pray to Allah for forgiveness and when you are not sure abt its lost then why to worry,just think you are virgin,pious,untouched,and INsha Allah your husband will feel the same.
    Best of luck i'll pray for you.
    Laaibah.

  8. Salam
    I'm an 18 year old girl,I was in a relationship with a 19 year old boy for almost 2years
    We both are muslims...
    And pretty religious too..
    But we have committed sins
    We did not have sex..but we were intimate.
    We kiSsed,hugged and a little more intense.
    But on the 26th night of ramadan he passed away in a car accident after the tahjjud prayer.
    I want to make sure that Allah (swt) forgives him and make his grave a bed of jannah
    Please guide me on what can I do to repent from my side as well as from his side too
    Thanks

  9. The sister who lost her virginity vit her boyfriend I can just say get out of it asap cz things would worse with time n vit Alllaah's wrath u can get Nufin nor in this world or the akhira..
    So leave your boyfriend just for the pleasure of Alllaah or either get married and make your relatnshp lawful n ask for Alllaah's mercy on you.. N if U'r repentance is true Alllaah ta'la wud definitely forgive you..
    Alllaah is most high,most merciful...

  10. salut tous le monde!!! j vraiment besoin de votre aide! j'ai 19 ans et j'ai un copain avc qui j'ai fait plusieurs choses que je regrette et qui me brise mn ame a chaque fois que j'y pense!!! j'ai pas vrmt fait un rapport sexuelle avec lui ce qui veut dire que je suis vierge ! mai j'ai fait des truc tres grave sont me devierger! et maintenant je suis avec lui slmt parceque j fait cela ! il m'avai dit un jour ou on voulais finir notre relation:" rapelle toi de se qu'on a fait ... et que dans la premiere nuit avc tn futur maris tu te sentiras pas bien , tu te sentiras coupable ..et tu ne seras pas heureuse parceque tu va te rapeller de tous ce qu'on fait ") . il n'arrete po de me torturer en me disant pareille .. c la seule raison pour laquelle je suis avc lui !! il dit qu'il m'aime et qu'on va se marier mai moi je ne ve po de lui apres tous ce ki est arriver ! je me suis disputer avc lui po mal de fois et on s'est gifler l'un l'autre! j'esseille pas de mal de fois de finir cette relation mai lui il y tiens bcps!! !! je continue avc lui et je lui ment en disant que je l'aime car si je lui dit la verite il va me blesser par les mm paroles!! svp aider moiii ! je me suis tres coupable !! j peur que mn future mari me demande des questions : si javai des relation , jaurai peur de lui mentir !! j peur du future !! svp que faire.... svp ca serai mieux si on discute parl email .. j bcps de choses intime a dire ke je pe po postuler .....

    • Dear Reader/Writer,

      My French isnt all that great so I can't translate your comment, but I can make out that you need help. So please log in and submit your question as a separate post and preferably in English.

      JazakhAllahkhayr,

      SisterZ
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

      • You speak english, urdu, learning the koranic arabic and also speak french?? That's much of you and that's great!!, i can only speak one here, and that too not as perfect as you. You really sound great sister and you really working hard..

        • Brother Mohd,

          Lol, I'm just a normal dudette who's new years resolution is to beat laziness, so I'm really not great at all.

          English is my first language hence I'm fluent in it. I struggle to speak Urdu and Punjabi, but they are my mother tongue, hence I get by in speaking them, not reading or writing. I studied French at school for some years, but apart from a very few words, I've forgotten everything I learned. In the above post, the two important words are: 'votre aid,' meaning 'your help'.

          I do not understand Quranic Arabic unfortunately, but my Arabic Language classes will start next month insha'Allah. Thats the most important thing insha'Allah!!

          So see...theres nothing spectacular about moi.

          SisterZ
          IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  11. ************ plz sisters add me !! i really need help

    (Email add deleted by Editor)

  12. My all respectable sisters, here i tell you please dont waste your money and time to stupied things....I am MBBS doctor and i also a sexologist. hymen never restore or repair...once virginity gone its gone forever never came back......Being a MUSLIM just believe on ALLAH and pray with concentration...INSHA ALLAH you get well soon. I saw a ALLAH miracle once my colleague in MBBS is non virgin but she loss her virginity to her lover but after that he leaves...but she bleed at first night due to prayers..just prayer..ALLAH do everything.

    As a sincere brother please don't loss your respect,just pray to ALLAH.

  13. Hey im also in the same boat with u guys.. i lost my virginty to my boyfriend who is 2 yeard older than i am i am 18 of age. my mother found out about wht we did and has asked me to tell him to ask for my hand in marriage since he says hes srs abt me. he said he will ask for my hand in marriage were jst waitin till he speaks to his father wen he comes back from over seas. i love him and he loves me. we wnt this to work and weve both repented and regret doin it be4 marriage. i jst wnt to knw is it a good thing were gettin married? I mean it is great and we are excited abt it because we always wnted this for eachother not to mention weve neen together for 4 years..Allah ghafour l raheem w nshalla yegjferelnaAmeen

    • Rania,

      Yes, it is certainly better than living in sin. If you have any doubts though, don't brush them under the carpet because you think you're in love. Face them, deal with them and then make an informed decision. If you have any further questions, please log in and submit them as a separate post. Thank you.

      SisterZ
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  14. I went out with a guy a while back and we nearly had sex. Things used to get so intense when we were intimate that sometimes I think if we went out any longer I would have lost my virginity. I think in that sense Allah blessed me. When we were intimate he did do something that made me bleed, however it wasn't sex. Does that mean I lost my virginity? I can't spell this out I'm quite embarassed. Also I have been suffering from depression just remembering what I did and sometimes I wish I'm better off dead. This happened four years ago and I promised Allah I won't go out with anyone after and Alhamdulillah I haven't. However, recently I have met few guys and they have showed interest to meet me. I do miss feeling loved and having a companion and sometimes its hard to say no to these guys. Please guide me what should I do?

    • Sister I shouldn't advice you in someoneels post I know editors will tell you to write in separate posts but I want to tell you in short that, you wear in sin and still you in sins. You said near had sex? It dosent make sence you did and it's good you reorient to Allah . I know what you talking about but I don't know the answer for bleeding because I don't think you will bleed until it's in . Still I am confused because two thing can use also I don't want to mention.

      I will suggest you to seek allahs guidance more ask for forgiveness. You said recently you meet "few" guys wrong do not waste time on that, the time you putting on that you can ise it in praying, duas or other islamic things. If you really want to love then get MARRIED sister donot involve yourself in relation just get married. Tell your parents to help you. Shaitan wants you to be on trap again that's the sigh sister. Do not let shaitan win this time.  

    • Samia,

      Please log in and submit your question as a post so we can help you InshaAllah. In the meantime be strong and learn to say no - keep away from guys. Is it better to disappoint these boys a little then dissappoint Allah A LOT.

      Sara
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  15. Sorry spelling mistake "repent to Allah

  16. asslam.o.alikum
    i am facing the same problem.we did sex and i don't know how i lost my virginity because i never let him insert. but after one month when my periods date passed out and i vomitted i was affraid. i tested myself and i was shocked to see that i was pregnent. i m still unable to understand that how is it possible to be pregnent without having complete sex. but i think this was a punishment by Allah as i was always affraid of Allah during the process and tried to make him realize that this is wrong but he never listened.then i had my abortion by D&C method.
    now i m so worried about my future life.i feel so regret on my sin. daily i pray to Allah for His forgiveness but i don't know why my heart says that i m a very bad girl Allah will never forgive me. plz help me and tell me how can i make my Allah happy and is ther any method that i can gain my virginity back and my husband never know about abortion?
    plz help me i m so upset mentally

    • Wa'alaykumsalam,

      You're in trouble because Allah is angry at you, but Allah's mercy overpowers His anger and so you may have some peace.

      I'm not sure if you're married or not. If you are, are you hinting at extra marital affair ? If not, then 'boyfriend' most certainly.

      To sum up what you did, you're in a haram pre-marital relationship/extra marital relationship, you've committed zina, you've done abortion. Sin on top of sin. But since you've realised your faults, you should repent daily till your last breath. Sister, FEAR ALLAH. The fuel of hell would be humans.

      Regarding your pregnancy, its very unlikely to get pregnant without the actual act of vaginal intercourse. But there are other ways, for example, premature ejaculation or anal sex (semen dripping towards the vagina) or mutual masturbation (semen on fingers and then inserted) or etc. If none of the above, then Allah knows best.
      Abortion is a sin and forbidden in Islam. Its a murder. Do repent sincerely.

      Your bf is not to be blamed solely, you are responsible too for this mess and for disobeying Allah big time. Know that pre-marital relationship/extra marital relationships is forbidden in Islam. No gf/bf. Stop communicating with that man.
      For the repentance to be accepted, there is a procedure. Learn that and then repent. Continuing your illegal relationship with that man, will make your repentance totally useless. Come back to the straight path.

      "And return [in repentance] to your Lord and submit to Him before the punishment comes upon you; then you will not be helped."

      "And follow the best of what was revealed to you from your Lord before the punishment comes upon you suddenly while you do not perceive" (39:54-55)

      Allah will forgive you. Thinking that Allah will never forgive you is initself a sin. He is Al Ghaffar.

      "..never give up hope of Allah's soothing Mercy: truly no one despairs of Allah's Soothing Mercy, except those who have no faith."

      "Say: O My servants who have transgressed against their own souls, despair not of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Most Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surah az-Zumar 39:53)

      "And the men and the women who remember Allaah much with their hearts and tongues. Allaah has prepared for them forgiveness and a great reward [al'Ahzaab 33:35]

      Regarding "gaining your virginity back", nope there is no way a person can do that. Virginity is lost when the sex organ of a male enters your tunnel. Since you said earlier that you didn't let him insert, there may be a possibility that your hymen is still intact. So no need to think to much. Do not deceive anyone. Deceivers do not belong to this ummah according to our Prophet (SAW). The damage has been done. Past is past. Just wait for Allah's mercy and hope for the best in the future insha'Allah.

      Do not tell your husband/husband to be about your abortion.

      Be dutiful to Allah. Pray. Obey Allah and abandon shaytan. Fear Allah. Make lots of du'a and tawbah. May Allah forgive you and guide you. Ameen.

      • I never do wrong
        never had sex
        or physical relatn with smeone
        but at the age ov 9, my czn do wrong to me at nght
        He do anal sex
        i was a kid
        i dnt knw what hapnd to me
        but i still remembred, nxt day my mom ask about me blood spot and do chkup me
        I am afraid that is that spot bcz ov verganity ??
        is it verganity dsturb bcz ov anal sex
        if it is so ??
        thn whts my fault ???
        Allah us insaan ko punish q ni krta
        usy be ak naek lrki naek beti ni milni cheiye
        i am engagd, but
        afraid to marry

        Am i lose my verganity ????
        my partnr trust me alot
        but what happnd if i not bleed ???
        it seems like
        am over...
        Allah plz help me

        • As-salamu alaykum. You should be clear that you were completely innocent in what happened. You were a victim of sexual abuse. Your cousin committed a crime against you. There is no need to tell your future husband about this incident, unless you choose.

          You are still considered a virgin. Even if your hymen is broken and you do not bleed after marriage, you are still a virgin. There is far too much emphasis placed on the braking of the hymen and bleeding. Islamically it has no significance. Many women lose the hymen naturally, through sports, exercise, horseback riding, etc.

          Wael
          IslamicAnswers.com Editor

    • That is crazy! if you did not "LET HIM INSERT" then how in this world did you get pregnant??!

  17. thanks for the suggestions.but after your reply i m feeling more guilty.day by day i m going down just because of this feeling.i don't know how to please my Allah.but now i will try my best to compensate every lose.i will try to keep myself apart from wrong doings in future INSHA ALLAH.
    secondly i want to tell u that i m not married yet but going to marry in a month or two. and the one who is involved with me in that sin is my cousin. we love each other so much and want to marry but due to family clashes our marrige is not possible he is also shamefull and repenting on what we have done. my parents had done my nikah with someone else.that is a paper marrige.but now i m affraid of marrige.i daily pray to GOD for his forgiveness and to give me hidayat to properly adjust in my married life.
    i want to ask if the abortion creats any complication in next pregnency or dilivery?i m afraid of it that after marrige if it happens then my husband will know about this?
    and do tell me any wazifa or dua which can help me bring HIS anger down?

    • I apologize if that's how you felt. I just wanted to make sure that you are very much aware of the severeness of the sins. Basically, if my muslim brothers or sisters commits a sin which is grave, I feel its wrong if I dont explain the graveness of it (As Allah himself puts fear in our heart by explaining His punishments for grave sins), major and minor sins has differences and therefore we should express it. Remorse is actually the first step of repentance mam. Therefore its good. For example, Some people might have commited adultery, and if we comment saying " you did wrong, dont do it again " etc, then we are not expressing its severeness unlike how Islam expresses it by saying, the adulterer should be 'stoned'. We should do somewhat similar in advising people, just to put fear in their heart for them to repent sincerely and never go back insha'Allah.

      Therefore, hold on to repentance as obviously Allah WILL forgive you. He WILL. He will infact give you more rewards and goodness for repenting sincerely. He is the most merciful for a reason. Allah will be happy if you bow down and submit to Him sincerely.

      The conditions or ways to seek sincere Tawbah or Repentance from the Merciful Allah are:

      You must be aware of the sins, and feel sorry and ashamed of the sin.
      Makes a solemn covenant and promise with Allah that you will not repeat this sins again.
      Turn to Allah and seeks forgiveness, before angel of death comes knocking.

      Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 39 Surah Zumur verses 53-54:
      (O Prophet) say: “O My servants who have wronged their own souls….Do not despair ofAllah’s Mercy! Surely, Allah forgives all sins. He indeed is the All Forgiving, All Merciful. Returnto your Lord and submit to Him before the scourge overtakes you; for then you may getno help from anywhere.”

      Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale Imraan verse 135-136:

      "Allah likes such good people very much, who, if ever they commit a bad deed or wrong their own soul by the commission of a sin, remember Allah instantly, and ask for forgiveness from Him for their shortcomings. For who, but Allah, can forgivesins? (And Allah loves those) who do not knowingly persist in the wrongs they did. These will be rewarded with forgiveness from Allah, and with Gardens beneath which canals flow, and they will reside therein forever! How excellent is the reward of those who do good deeds!

      Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 25 Surah Furqaan verses 63-71:
      "The (true) servants of the Merciful are those who walk humbly on the earth. When the ignorant people behave insolently towards them, they say, “Peace to you”; (And those) who pass their nights in prostrating themselves and standing before their Lord and pray, “O our Lord, save us from the torment of Hell, for its torment is killing! It is an evil abode, and an evil resting place”. (Andthose) who, when they spend are neither extravagant, nor miserly, but keep the goldenmean between the two extremes. (And those) who do not invoke any god but Allah Alone, nor kill a soul unjustly, which Allah has forbidden, nor commit adultery… He who does this shall be punished for his sin, and his torment shall be doubled on the Day of Resurrection, and he shall abide in a state of ignominy; EXCEPT THE ONE WHO MAY HAVE REPENTED (AFTER THOSE SINS), AND HAVE BELIEVED AND DONE RIGHTEOUS DEEDS. For then, Allah will change his evil deeds into good deeds, and He is very Forgiving and Merciful. In fact, one who repents and does righteous deeds, returns to Allah as one rightly should!

      Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 6 Surah Anaam verse 54:
      "When those come to you who believe in Our Signs, say: "Peace be on you! Your Lord had inscribed for Himself (the rule of) Mercy. Verily if any of you did evil in ignorance, and thereafter repented and amended (his conduct), Lo! He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."

      Allah himself promised to forgive all sins except shirk. And so therefore, seek His forgiveness.

      Abortion normally do not create any complications in the next pregnancy or delivery. But no one can guarantee. Everything is in Allah's hand. He may/may not bless us with kids. It depends on Him, therefore ask Him to grant you healthy kids and make your marriage life succesfull insha'Allah.

      If no one knows you did abortion, then your husband-to-be wouldn't find out insha'Allah. Keep it between you and Allah.

      After how many months of pregnancy did you abort the fetus ? ( Its important )

      But in my opinion, living a life by living a lie is much more worse and its effects will be experianced whilst married. It happens many times and therefore, I would pray Isthikhara and make lots of tawbah and duas.

      • Dua repels Allah’s anger and brings about Allah’s love. The Prophet (pbuh) said;the one who does not ask of Allah, Allah (swt) gets angry. The more you ask the more Allah (swt) will love you. This is the beauty of Dua.

        These are some du'as-


        - "O Lord, I have wronged myself. So forgive me.Verily save You there is no one who can protect from the consequences of sinning."

        - "O Allah, I seek forgiveness for every sin, I committed, about which, of course, You know inside and out, from the beginning to the end of my life, whether committed deliberately or intentionally, few or many, abstruse or manifest, old or new, secretly carried out or openly done; and for whatever wrong I have done I turn repentant unto Youand beseech You to bless Muhammad and thechildren of Muhammad and forgive all my unjust acts I did to wrong the people (because they have rights which I have to recognize and fulfill) but You have full authority to forgive those wrongdoings whenever and howsoever You wish, O the most merciful."

        - "O Allah, I seek Your forgiveness for those wrongdoings for which I had turned repentant unto you but have done again. I seek your forgiveness for those deeds which I planned to do for your sake only but afterwards other interests not connected with You crept in, and I seek Your forgiveness for my taking advantage of the bounties, You gave me, in order to disobey You. I seek forgiveness of Allah (who is) “There is no god save He, the self-subsisting, the knower of the unknown and known, the beneficent, the merciful.” For all those sins which I have committed and for all those transgressions I perpetrated. O Allah grant me perfect ability to use, follow and apply reason, astute and keen determination, preponderant genius, pure heart, all-embracing wisdom and beautiful elegent manners. Let all these favours work for my good; let them not harm me, through your mercy, O the most merciful."

        - "O Allah, forgive me wrongdoings which you know inside and out, and if I do them again, then forgive me again. O Allah, forgive me for not fulfilling those promises I made to myself but did not put them into effect. O Allah, forgive me the mysterious suggestions of theeyes, my bad language, forgetfulness, carelessness, and foolish utterances."

        - "O Allah, I beseech You because (praise be to You. There is no god save You, the munificent, the originator of the heavens andthe earth, the owner of glory and generosity) I am a needy beseecher, an apologetic suppliant and a repentant seeker of pardon. O Allah send blessing on Muhammad and on the children of Muhammad and forgive me all my sins, old and new, committed by me. O Allah, do not aggravate my misfortunes and do not let my enemies laugh at me, because there is no remover and preventer (of misfortune) save You."

  18. thanks a lot for these words.that mean a lot to me.......
    i aborted in the 5th week of pregnancy.the doctor told me that was just a little clot but since that time my heart is always fearfull of commiting one more sin but....idon't know how to make myself senseable but i m mentally so depressed. everyone around me seems very pious in my sight. i feel myself a very bad girl. i seriously need a dua or any miricle to bring comfort to my heart and my counscious
    plz help me that if nothing is inserted how it is possible.i never bleed.thats why when i knew about pregnancyi was shocked that i never bleed i am a virgin then how how how????
    all these things make me mad when i think about them.in namaz i just weep.i dont know how to ask HIM for forgiveness.i feel myself unable to ask HIS mercy i so bad

    • You said you are virgin ( By this, it means, he never penetrated you, like ever. ) Strange indeed. Ok lets make it more clear, Did any sperm came on or in your tunnel (vag...)? Even if he ejaculate on your tunnel, the sperm can swim inside. Or possibly, some semen are on your fingers and then you've inserted them in your tunnel by mistake ? Or anal sex can result in pregnancy when the semen drips towards your tunnel ? Or dry humping can rarely let the sperm pass through the clothes towards your tunnel. The main thing is that, the semen has to go in, for you to be pregnant. You know what you did with him. If none at all, then I wouldn't deny miracle. Virgin getting pregnant? only virgin Maryam comes to mind, But this is improbable. You may end up in an institute, if you testify to this lol. You may be unaware and that cousin did somthing to you. Allah knows best.

      Dont feel that you are a bad girl, you obviously have good sides. I know for one, you have a good heart now. You are already repenting and praying your obligatory prayers. You maybe more closer to Allah than ever before. Feelings of remorse and guilt are natural reflections of sinning, if the person who has sinned has a conscious which is alive. After committing a sin, a person who fears Allah and give high respect to Him would feel a sense of despondency and despair thinking, "How will God forgive me for this sin?" However, it is note worthy that despairing of God's mercy is in itself one of the major sins in Islam for God is ever merciful, ever forgiving.
      As He says in the Qur'an:
      "Do not despair of God's mercy; He will forgive you of all your sins". (Qur'an39:53).

      Allah will love you and He will also change your sins to good deeds after repenting and being pious. Therefore, continue seeking forgiveness.

      Ale Imraan verse 135-136:
      "Allah likes such good people very much, who, if ever they commit a base deed or wrong their own soul by the commission of a sin, remember Allah instantly, and ask for forgiveness from Him for their shortcomings. For who, but Allah, can forgive sins? (And Allah loves those) who do not knowingly persist in the wrongs they did. These will be rewarded with forgiveness from Allah, and with Gardens beneath which canals flow, and they will reside therein forever! How excellent is the reward of those who do good deeds!

      "Except those who repent, have faith and good deeds, those Allah will charge their sins for good deeds. Certainly Allah is most forgiving and merciful." (Qur'an 25:70)

      " Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do heart finds satisfaction. " (13:28)

      Continue praying daily. Focus while praying, ward of shaytan's whispers. Try hard. Pray salat al tawbah. And keep in mind Allah loves His obidient and repenting servants. He has already guided you. His mercy overpowers His anger. Guilt will fade with time, therefore have patience. May Allah ease your situation.

  19. yes the first case you describe is mine.everything was just on outside.and possibly sperms swim inside.that was not miricle and this was the thng which was out of my mind. thanks for explainig it. but i will request do istakhara for me.n tell methe method of istakhara too

    • Pheww, atleast the mystery is solved now. Atleast this won't distract you during salat anymore insha'Allah.

      Regarding Isthikhara- The istikhara prayer may be made for a specific matter or be made for a general seeking of all that is best.
      Imam al-Nawawi mentioned that before the istikhara prayer, one should seek advice (istishara) from those whose knowledge, wisdom, and concern one is confident. Ibn Hajar al-Haytami and others mentioned that one of the benefits of this is to further distance oneself from the desires of one's own egotistic inclinations.

      According to a report transmitted on the authority of Muhammad ibn al-Munkadir, it was Jabir ibn 'Abdi'llah (may Allah be well pleased with him and with his father) who said:
      "Allah's Messenger (Allah bless him and give him peace) used to teach us how to seek guidance in choosing the best option available in a practical enterprise [al-istikharafi 'l-amr], just as he would sometimes teach us a Chapter [Sura] from the Qur'an. :
      "'If one of you is concerned about some practical undertaking, or about making plans for a journey, he should perform two cycles of ritual prayer [rak'atain], not as an obligatory observance [fard], but voluntarily. Then he should say:

      "Allahumma inni astakhiru-ka bi-'ilmi-ka wa astaqdiru-ka bi-qudrati-ka wa as'alu-ka min fadli-ka 'l-'azim fa-inna-ka taqdiru wa la aqdiru wa ta'lamu wa la a'lamu wa Anta 'Allamu 'l-ghuyub : Allahumma in kunta ta'lamu anna hadha 'l-amra ( think of what your matter is ) khairun li fi dini wa dunyaya wa akhirati wa 'aqibati amri wa 'ajili-hi wa ajili-h:fa-'qdir-hu li wa yassir-hu li thumma barik li fi-h : wa illa fa-'srif-hu 'an-ni wa yassir liya 'l-khaira haithu kana ma kuntu wa raddi-ni bi-qada'i-ka ya Arhama 'r-rahimin "

      {O Allah, I ask You to show me what is best, through Your knowledge, and I ask You to empower me, through Your power, and I beg You to grant me Your tremendous favor, for You have power, while I am without power, and You have knowledge, while I am without knowledge, and You are the One who knows all things invisible. O Allah, if You know that this ( think of the matter ) is in the best interests of my religion, my life in this world, and my life in the Hereafter, and can yield successful results in both the short term and the long term, then make it possible for me and make it easy for me, and then bless me in it.If not, then turn it away from me, and make it easy for me to do well, wherever I may happen to be, and make me content with Your verdict, O Most Merciful of the merciful.}

  20. thanks a lot.i will definitly tell u when i will be succesfull in earning HIS forgiveness INSHA ALLAH. thanks again for all the suggestions and guidance

    • INSHA'ALLAH... And welcome.

      • Aoa I need to ask u something m 24years old my cozn raped me when I was 16 after that I stopped visiting my cozns or nothing like this happened to but now I'm engaged n getting marry in few months m so worried about my 1st night if there will be no bleeding my husband will get to know about it that m not Virgin ;(;( what should I do now ?? Is there any medicine or anything which can help so that it bleed on my wedding night; (;(

  21. Assalamu Alaykom,
    Please I need a wise advice from an expert because I am really lost of what to do in my situation.

    (I have deleted the rest of your comment. Please log in and write your question as a separate post, thank you. - IslamicAnswers.com Editor)

  22. all girls!!!
    It Unrepeatable mistake
    so please stay away form such kinda of works!!!
    thankyou

  23. Hello friends i also have some problem which i wanted to solve.. I rubbed finger inside vagna opening but it didnt pain nor bleed would i have broken my hymen? I want to knw that i am still a virgin or not? I am scared because the person with whome m going to marry told me that if i didnt bleed on marge ni8 he will divorcd me plx help:-(

    • Maha, a virgin is someone who has never had sexual intercourse. So you are still a virgin. Any man who says that if you do not bleed he will divorce you is uneducated and narrow minded and probably not good husband material. Either he trusts you or he doesn't. If you need more advice then please log in and write your question as a separate post.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  24. Pray 4 me.. N thnkx 4 ur cmntx.. I have sme othr qustnx to ask bt i dnt knw how to login 4 ths website.

    • Well after giving you this kind of commetment before married and you think still he is nice and you love him its your own choice we have nothing to say and yes if you are virgin then yes you will bleed.

  25. Nadia sis he ix a nice guy i knw hm n lve him also.. N i have heard that itx also in islam tht a muslim women should have to bleed at hr mrge ni8.. Is it ri8?

  26. I am virgin Bcoz I never had sex , but jab mujhy menses huay 1st time tab main school main parhti thi main hamesha is bat sy darti thi k Kahin yeh na ho k mujhy periods ho jayen or mera uniform Khrab na ho Jaye and sb k samny insult na ho Jaye isi dar sy menses aany sy Pehly main khud apna fingure apny vegina main dal k check karti thi k menses to nhi aye ........ Ab mujhy collage level mein aa k PTA Chala hai k shadi ki rat ko Kia sb Hota hai , isi liye ab main dar rhi Hun k Kahin future mein mery liye koi problem to nhi hoga ? Qn m mainey before marrige apni e fingure vegina mein dal dia tha ?

    • Shoni you are still a virgin, though if you broke your hymen some men may not believe you are a virgin. That's simple ignorance, as many things can break the hymen, including sports.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  27. Mujhe plz koi dr guide kare i have a bf i love him alot per hum shadi ni kar sakte kya aik bar intercourse se seal break hojati hai phir set ni hoti kya virgina bht loose open hojati hai

    • Assalaamualaikam

      I apologise if I have misunderstood (sometimes things get lost in translation?) but am I correct in thinking that you have had sexual intercourse with your boyfriend, and are concerned about whether breaking your hymen means you have lost your virginity and concerned about wanting to marry him?

      Midnightmoon
      IslamicAnswers.com editor

      • midnightmoon: She wants to know if her hymen will break/tear after one time sexual intercourse and also if her vagina will get very loose after one time sex.

  28. Assalamu alikum,hey guys,i am not good to speak english,but,i want tell u all my sister n brothers,stay away frm all this type of activities,bcz its haram,in my opinion,love a person aftr marriage,that is saftey for all of us,we r humans,we will fall to sins,but,we should hve to pray to allah with cry for forgivnes, alhmadulilah,i am pure virgin boy,i am keeping my everythng for only my partner,dear sisters n brothers,stay away frm this type of activity,it wil make more sadnes in heart,love after marriage only,protect ourself, love u all,may allah bless us ,stay away from sins,

  29. you cant control yourself? you always have a choice , you can control yourself
    .

  30. ...

    [Editor's note: Please submit your question (in English, preferably) as a new post for publication rather than as a comment on an existing post. That way it can be published and answered in turn, inshaAllah.]

  31. i m 22 years old and i lost my virginity 2 years ago and still in-touch wd my b.f .My b.f used to fingering into my vagina .i m 2 much worried about it.i feel i m gona mad.but there is no body to help me nd understand my situation.when 1st time my b.f do sex wid me there is no bleeding .my b.f surprised nd me also.although my b.f didn't believe at on me. at dat time i m scatted into pieces. now i m gona married wd some 1. some times i thought i hv to tell dis fact to my husband.but there is so many doubts sometimes i thought about sucide. but i m failed.i m 2 much disturb at this type of condition.some times i thought i hv to use fake pills to restore my virginity.then i m fell i m selfish. now what can i do?plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz help me i aslo want to consult any dr. because my period cycle was also disturb at dat time. any doc tell me if i use fake medicines then it will be good 4 me at my weeding night.i also pray to my God to help me..i forget all my sins but i feel it is stuck in my mind.now my condition is very bad. m near to become mad it is worst 4 my life.plzzzz tel me. plzzzzzz help me

    • @shama
      Theres nothing for you to worry about. repent to Allah. Leave it in hands of Allah. It is haraam to end your life. Plus there is no bf/gf relationship in Islam it is haraam. May Allah make it easy for you not all girls bleed on wedding night.

  32. Me also please any one help me ,
    i also lose my virginity by boyfriend, and i love him
    please help me, i m 17 yrs old.

    • Marry him and tell him to bring your hand in marriage. Stop the sin it is haraam and repent to Allah. It is not worth allowing yourself to be used in a haraam way.

  33. Allah will bless you If you really feel guilty. there is no other way for your self-satisfaction.You have to tell your husband before marriage. If he adopt you then it is all right otherwise search another who can accept u. if you feel any difficulty, write on this page for help.

    • i never do sex but i masturbate since many years now i am 18 n m so scared k masturbate se v lost tu nahi hojati na q k me kafi years se kar rahi hu maine finger nahi daali but rub buhot karti hu plz help me

      • OP: i never do sex but i masturbate since many years now i am 18 n m so scared ...........k masturbate se v lost tu nahi hojati na........... q k me kafi years se kar rahi hu maine finger nahi daali but rub buhot karti hu plz help me

        You are safe, you did not insert even your finger in your.........

        One important thing, you have hymen but you even don't know if you lost it or not. How can a man who never seen a hymen tell if you have it or not?

  34. The editors tell a person to post their question as a separate post but then go ahead and answer another persons question. (especially if thats person is a female). im curious what gives one persons question authority over another

    • Sometimes it depends on the situation--like if a girl might abort a child.

      Anyways, I'd say that 8 or 9 out of 10 posts are from females, so your point about favouring females is not true.

    • It has nothing to do with male or female. The general rule is that one must submit their question as a separate post, especially if the question is long, or requires detailed advice. However, if the question is easy to answer or requires only a short answer, I might answer it right away. If it is an emergency situation, I'll move the post to the front of the queue.

      Do not try to create divisions where none exist. P.S. do you realize this post is 4 years old?

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  35. Didn't realize this was a female dominated forum , wonder why that is

  36. Do you realize I never referred to this post specifically?

  37. Very Inspiring Stories......
    M Speechless... 🙁
    Laibah Hats off (y)

  38. Ok so you committed a sin
    Your only 16 ?
    Seriously why did you lose your virginty in such a young age
    That's why allah (swt) said that dating,flirting and having sex before marriage is Haram
    And things like losing tour virginty happens you never know a guy can lie all we have to do is keep our eyes open you should of been more aware and stopped him ?
    But you could do this
    Use a virgin blood capsule
    U just put it in your vagina and when you have it with your future husband blood will come out to show proof ?

    • Oh my god.

      • OMG...! All of y too much...Allah forgive everyone specialy me...its is our foult not blame to other person whos y give y virginty. Every one have its sin...i dont understand whay we dont told taht things of our children and frinds and thoses people who servive with virginty. After that everyone cime on the right way bcz Evile went from our hearts that way our heart feeling sin..and craying...in my exp every one share that exp with our childrens whatever boy or girl...its is very helpfull for those virginity. Butt that stage our children not lesson parents just like us so plz plz plz dont stop y lost of virginty exp from children friends and who servivle of that thing

  39. i lost my virginity how i can get back? reply must

  40. ASSALAM O Alaikum. If anyone has committed zina so it is related to hukookullah not hukkulibad it means only you and your partner know and the almighty Allah so never tell to your friend, no need to make any witness and start mercy to Allah and never try to do this again. Alhamdulillah I have never a girl friend and never done this although I am in the age of 28 so it's all about Allah, s Grace on me...

  41. Assalam O Alaikum,

    I am 23 years old and I lost my virginity to my muslim boyfriend.i dont want to intercourse after first time i dont want to do it again again i told him after merried and now we are gna get merried after few months will allah forgive us i regret so much

    Please help me,

    • Allah can forgive you if you repent sincerely with a very regretful heart and vow not to do it again. You seem to already fulfill the conditions of repentance in your comment which are:

      1-regret, 2-stopping the sin, 3-being determined not to do it again

      Which Alhamdulillah is good, many people nowadays commit such sins like you did, but they do not regret it at all. Allah is merciful, but only if you are sincere.

      However, in order not to fall into the same mistake, try to stay away from the boy until you get married, inshAllah.

      Good luck, and may Allah accept your repentance

  42. Tahajad ki namaz aisi namaz ha k ALLAH SWT khud kahta ha k ha koi mujh sa mangna wala/wali, yeh namaz aisi ha k isma jo bhi manga jai sidqa dil sa qabool hota ha. Hidayat dana wala bhi wohi aik ALLAH ha, ho sakta ha sidqe dil sa mangi hoi dua toba aur hidayat k derwaza khol dai. Paanchon waqt ki namazan qaim kerna ki koshish karo, ager nahin ker sakta to kum az kum aik sa hi start ker k dekho, ALLAH kerm ker da ga, INSHA ALLAH.

  43. I want to ask a question from fawad

  44. kiya unmarried fingering kr sakti h is ka koi effect toh ni ?? agr mai fingering karon toh after marriage pregnancy mein koi side ecffect toh ni ho ga is ka?

    • I don't speak Urdu, but if I understand you correctly, you want to know if masturbation will affect your ability to get pregnant after marriage? The answer is no, it has no effect.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  45. I'm a 15 year old guy and there is one thing that has really got me confused. What is the big deal with virginity anyways? Why do men often refuse to marry someone who's not a virgin and only want to marry virgins ? Humans make mistakes and maybe someone committed Zina (then repented) or got divorced are often viewed as , I don't wish to put it this way, inferior beings ?
    Thanks in advance
    Wasalaam

    • kazim, there's a difference between a divorced woman and one who committed zinaa. Let's not equate the two. With that said, men are jealous by nature and don't like to imagine their woman lying with another man. I think that's all it is.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

      • Assalmuallaikum...
        Today sin became more and people are thinking about only money.
        I too was in this situation he left me beacuse i m not soo much rich.i knw i did wrong i was regreat about it.i m so helpless to express but no one no my inner heart i cried alot i just want to marry when i have done that zinna i knw at the time of young age we do alot of mistake.But only man can help us for getting marriage a girl.cant force or cnt insist for marriage a girl have no authority why.......
        I did zinaa but i cnt say to my family about it i knw i m wrong but still a man and a women born as same but man have more authority then women.
        I just want to marry with my boy frnd he left me for money.
        I m middle class girl hw can i effort money.
        I loved him but he cheated me.....
        After that i dnt love anyone beacause i only love my parents and my family members....

        • Hello afreen there is mistake in girls why they bleve in that type of boys why the girl is being a part of zina I apeal that girl plz when u become in love dnt forget ur parents bcz they beliv in u why u break ur parents belive

  46. Asslam-o-alaikum..
    i have a girlfriend since 4 years..we both are virgin and clear minds.we were best friends . now we are on wrong track but nothing done yet. today i dont know how i come on this page and i read all posts. guys we are still virgin. guys plz help us to clear minds and keep virgin still meriage.

  47. Salam I'm a 19year old girl.
    I was in a relationship with a boy
    We had sex but not intercourse he never ever put inside me.
    But at that time I was in stuk situation I don't want to intercourse but, I sometimes I feel sex so I go to washroom and use hand shower at my vagina through that water presure I got pain and like sex I did this many times now I'm going to married a person who knows that I've a boy friend infact he said that he'll get to know by wedding night that I'm a virgin or not through blood
    I'm too much afraid bcz of that hand shower thing
    I don't know that my lyer is broken or not I'm I'm stul help me out
    I'm a virgin but through thi activity I'min a doubt

    • i guess marry during menses...i hv less info on menstruation but marry when u r on blooding time....its just amazing to hear u hv controlled urself from zina....just see 5 6 replies above someone mentioned about a cap or something..use that for blood..or use qasr-e-jame-e-shereen and put it inside xD

  48. Ap sab Girl say guzarish hai jis say ye galti hui ,, kindlly ... Khush raha krey bhula do is galti ko ...
    /
    Allah say maafi mango sachay dill say
    /
    aur ye nai kay apni ainda life main is happened ko yad rakhna hai .. bas is bat ko bhula do
    /
    Allah ap sab ko khushiyo say nawazay ga
    /
    Allah kehta mere banday muj say maafi mang bas ...
    /
    teri tobah main hud qubool karna chahta hun
    /
    bas aik dafa hud say apni islaah karo phr bhula kar Allah pak ko kaho Ya Allah paak muje muaaf kr dey
    /
    Tere siwa koi maaaf krnay wala nai

    /
    /
    yar main garantee deta hun ap girls ko ... Aienda zindagi ap ki khushiyo say bhar jaye ge ... Bas aik dafa apni gali ko sachay dil say man kr ... Allah say tobah kar kay bhula do.. forever
    /
    just
    aur dekho bas Khushi kya hai

    WHat is KHUSHI ?

  49. Aslam o alaikum..
    I m 20 year old I love a guy and meet him . He convinced me for sex but I refused then he without taking my permission wanted to do sex. But I was not agreed. He put penis into my virgina and its became to bleeding. Then he leave me we do not continued but it was bleeding. Plz can anyone tell me that now am I virgin or not.. Plz help me any one help me

    • What he did is rape .please report this to police and get him arrested .

      • I can't do this... Anyone just tell me that am i virgin or not now... Plzzzz any one tell me

        • If it was done to you without your consent, then yes, you are still a virgin.

          Wael
          IslamicAnswers.com Editor

          • Every girl dont take tnsn about virginity. Virginty or seal is very sensitive part nd break with heavy work, dancing or eating hot things so if u do a releation with some one its means ur hubby also do bcz " Zina aik qarz hy""
            Agar ap log pak ni tu wo bhi ni" achy ortoun ky achy mard or bury ky lie bury"
            So be easy and enjoy life with in the limits

          • Thanks wael for helping me ... but wael my layer have been broken then how can i virgin... plzzzz help me and tell me in details... May Allah blessed u... I tell u what happend. When I met him he said me for sexual intercourse I was not agreed but for his happiness I Let him insert but he insert about only for two or three second and then leave me we did not continued sex but during this my layer break and it was bleeding.. but blood did not come too much. Blood only come when I put my finger into vagrina and there was blood on my finger and I do this for three days once in a day to check is it bleeding or not... but there was blood on my finger also on third day... after this I did not check... now plzzz tell me am I virgin or not.. bcz my lover said that I m still virgin and it will be bleeding on first night.. now tell me is he saying truth or not

          • Now you are changing your story. Before you implied that he raped you. Now you say you gave him permission. So no, you are not a virgin.

            Honestly, blood or no blood, you are worrying about the wrong thing. Do you not realize that you are committing sins? What you are doing is zinaa. This is a serious sin. We do not have "lovers" in Islam, unless our lover is a husband or wife.

            Wael
            IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  50. The following all answers are working

  51. Plzz help me .i am afraid of my husband i lost verginity before marriage plzzz help me plz

  52. Hi amaal
    Waleikum asalaam
    Yea Allah will forgive your sins if you repent and don't tell people about it anymore make it a secret the prophet(S.A.W) told us to not expose our sins so don't worry umar (R.A) said that Allah will forgive ur sins if
    1. U are guilty and feeling ashamed while you are repenting
    2 . If u have a true intention that you will never repeat it again while repenting

    And don't worry no one is perfect we all make mistakes and sins .The prophet(S.A.W) said we all make sins but the best one of us is the one who repent
    remember Allah is the most merciful most forgiving Allah will forgive you if you repent before it's too late

    Remember never underestimate the mercy of your lord
    May Allah forgive your sins . Amin

  53. A.oa
    muja boht zaroori information chiya thi ma boht parshn honn i am 17 year old or ma jiska sath relation ma hon usna muja galat cheezo ma dal dia like finguring wagara wo muja sex ka liya force karna ha but ma koshish karti hon ka ma ignore kro ma boht parshn ho bcoz i lost my virginity finguring kar ka or ab wo muja asy bolta ka tum to virgin nhi ho tumha ko accept kary ga koi tum par trust nhi kry ga sirf ma kro ga q ka muja pata ha ka tum na finguring kar ka apni virginity loss ki....ma in sab cheezo sa nikalna chati hoo ma boht sharminda ho pata nhi ALLAH muja maf kara ga ya nhi ma boht mafi mangti ho lkin mari life ma sakoon nhi ha ma kia kron..

    kiya virginity repair ho skti ha ya kuch ni

    • Asalamualaykum Maham,

      I don't believe that you have lost your virginity merely by fingering each other. Yes, it's still a sin, but you can repent to Allah and vow never to do this again with another man unless he is your husband. Also, you should not be in a premarital relationship. You are young at 17 and should focus on your blessings and developing your talents. Allah is Most Merciful and will forgive you since you are sincere in leaving these haram actions in the past.

      Hugs,

      Nor
      IslamicAnswers

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