I am a Muslim girl who wants to marry a Hindu boy; please help me out.
Assalamuwalekum va rehmthullahi va barkatuhu
I am a Muslim girl. I strongly believe in Allah and His Messenger Muhammad(saw). I want to share evrything regarding me and my family and my realtionship with the guy please guide me to the right path. My parents love me a lot; my mother was a psychiatric patient when I was 11; my dad took care of her and at the same time me and my younger brother. No one of my relatives helped my family at that moment but it is the patience of my dad and the by the grace of Allah my mother was mentally cured and me and my brother are into education. No body believed that we completed our graduation successfully as they know my mom's problem.
My dad is a police constable. He is very strict and he loves me a lot he never used to call me with my name he always even now calls me as "maa". I love my dad too but when it comes to studies he used to be rude which made me to write "i hate u dad" in one of my note book. During my graduation, I met with the guy who said he is in love with me and want to marry me as he is a non-Muslim (Hindu). For the first year I said no because I know that my parents won't agree(our family is very big) but later on I realized that he is the one who cares for me a lot and then I said "yes". It was a relation of about 6 years; I used to say I will leave my parents and will marry him. Also, I said I am ready to leave everything except my religion; I told him that I pray to Allah and he said ok.
When the pressure from my parents to get married increased; I told about this guy they simply said "no" as he is a non-Muslim. My mom's health is getting worse, because of me her mental imbalance has started again(please forgive me Allah I love my parents and in every prayer I first pray for my parents' happiness and health). As I didnt read Quran and its rules my mom realized me alot of things about Quran and Allah and his Messenger Prophet Muhammadh(saw). I don't want to leave my religion and my parents. I want to read Quran but i can't even forget about that guy who loved me a lot and I too did. My parents are asking me to forget about that guy and marry another one; how can I do that its like some other guy going to come into my life whose going to take dowry+my body not my heart. I don't want the new guy to loose his beautiful life just because of me. As I referred this site and comments about marrying a non-Muslim guy I felt a little confident as he can convert to Islam. Again new problem he is ready to convert to Islam religion but he is asking me who will take care of his parents when they die who will perform the last rituals according to their religion. He has to perform the funeral and all that he is asking me if he converts to Islam how can he perform all that I can't be a 100% Muslim. Please please guide me what to do?
My dad said even he go for Hajj; I won't accept him how can I convince my parents and my elders? please, help me out I don't want to miss my parents at the same time him also and most importantly I don't want to leave my religion please guide me. If my dad still say no I want to tell him that I can't marry any other guy even instead I would like to complete my life as an independent strong woman who believes in Allah and his messenger Prophet MUhammadh (saw).
Thak you very much for reading with patience please send me any solution.
Muslim sister.
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Salaam Muslim sister.
Sorry to hear about your situation. It is haraam for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man, regardless of love and feelings etc, so your parents have every right to reject him on the basis that he is a non-Muslim. A nikah marriage between a Muslim woman and non-Muslim man would be invalid Islamically so they would be committing zina. Of course only a nikah makes a man and woman lawfully husband and wife. So there is no way you can marry him. If he converted sincerely for Allahs sake, it is Islamically allowed. But it is hard to clarify whether he is serious or not.
Deen is the most important thing to choose in a partner. I appreciate that you love him, but no one no matter how they love you/how nice they are - no one and nothing is worth risking your akhirah for. Allah allows what is good for us, or not bad for us, and He is His Great Wisdom has forbade what is bad for us. Trust in Him, obey His rules and you will not go wrong.
There are many problems which can occur if you marry this guy. You family rejecting you, severing the relationships between them, marriage problems (people change - once the veil of love fades, as it invariably does you may not like what you see.) If you are trying to grow in your deen, and he still does not believe or is not growing, the gap between you will widen. And one of the biggest obstacles of all - arguments about raising children. Some people teach both religions to the children and let them choose this is also wrong as children often grow up confused and with no deen. So your actions now could lead to your children being astray.
You are right though, you cannot just forget about this guy. These things take time. The first part is you need to accept you cannot obey Allah/be a good Muslimah and still continue your relationship with this guy. You need to acknowledge the sin you have committed and turn to Him and repent. Cut your contact with this guy - no being friends with him. Work to get closer to your deen. Don't worry about marrying anyone else - give yourself time to heal and see if you change your mind. You might, you might not - but the important thing is to leave this guy. Give him up for Allahs sake and you will be abundately rewarded InshaAllah. Make amends with your parents, if they are pressurising you to marry someone else explain to them that you will not keep a bf but you are not ready for marriage yet.
Work to get closer to Allah swt. Pray more if you can, read Qur'an and pray Tahajjud. Gain knowledge and take up a good useful hobby - preferably something that busies your mind, and of course is halal and fun! Many people have been through it, and they are here today Alhumdulilah - happy, healthy and willing to marry. It takes time but be strong, trust in Allah and you will get through it too.
Sara
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
I agree with everything Sara has said. I will only add that if the guy does convert to Islam sincerely, then yes you can marry him. Even if he converts, he can still attend to his parents and care for them.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Above parents first allah and prophet.Next nikah is between muslims not a non muslim Do not find reasons situation to all this nonsense Its simple you marry a non muslim the future generation of disbelivers through howmany of them? Do not be blind and spoil your life you loose allah islam prophet you r the biggest ruler. How do you say you will be happy with this hindu guy and not a muslim guy do you know the future or you plan the future. The best of love affairs go to dogs you r not different If you marry then marry only a good muslim ar remain alone instead of marrying a nonmuslim.All the reasons will never ever be accepted by allah do not dig your own grave .This world is worth of hours only when compare to the akhirah hereafter do not loose the never ending life of hereafter .You can come out of this just imagine for your hindu fiend parents ritual are important after death he his not readdy to be a muslim and you r ready to leave everything even the paradise for him Love is not permanent its just a lust nothing other than allah will exist and nothing is worth when compaed to islam so donot be desperate .
Well u already got ur answer that u cannot marry a non-muslim
Secondly , I don't believe it is so hard to forget a person , is it
Thirdly , to jadhav yes it haram for a muslim to marry a non muslim , yes v r all human being
But unlike other non-muslim we believe that this life is just a test/temporary and based on what we do in this life we will be rewarded in the hereafter
For that its a rule in islam from quran that a muslim can only marry a muslim or a revert which r ppl of the book
As for hindu I have a doubt that ur r ppl of the book
As for muslim man marrying hindu girls I'm against it and I strictly believe that a muslim should only marry a muslim , but as it said in the quran a muslim can marry a revert so it allows a muslim man to marry a non-muslim
And ve r not god to make this rule we follow the rules of quran which was written and send to all the human beings as a way of life
Totally agree with you and Zahid Ahmed. I myself will never except such marriage and i am saying this from experiance. Dont do it your family will be runied
Trublood
The Quran says marry a "believer" not a "muslim".
The difference being, that a 'believer' is one who believes in the ONE-ness of Allah. Allah will forgive all transgressions against Himself if someone repents, but the only thing He will NOT forgive, is associating partners with Him. On the other hand, 'muslim' means someone who SUBMITS to the will of Allah. A convert once said something to me that made me really think about this difference. He said"there are many people walking around who are muslims because of their thoughts and actions but are not aware that they are "muslims" i.e we use it more as a political label in this day and age, and who are WE to judge who is a muslim or not? And what guarantee, that someone who is a 'muslim' by birth or self-declaration may have no qualities that a true practicing muslim may have.
So please think ten times before quoting the Quran.
Salam
I don't agree with u here's y
Ok believer and muslim , as per I know islam is the only religion which believe in oneness of allah n muslim follow islam
Secondly "there are many people who are muslim coz of their thoughts and action but don't know"
Ok the a Hindu who , doesn't tell a lie , gives charity , respect other ppl , doesn't do bad deeds , but yet worship statues and other idol IS HE A BELIVER
A christian who , doesn't tell a lie , gives charity , respect other ppl , doesn't do bad deeds , but yet eats pork and believe issa is the son of god IS HE A BELIVER
A JEW ? I don't like to comment on these ppl only thing is ISRAELI ARE THESE PPL BELIVERS
So I think I made my point that a BELIVER is a muslim
I know in the quran it is said to marry a BELIVER
And muslim are the only BELIVERS in ALLAH till the end of the world
Thirdly, I am no one to comment on a great revelation sent by allah tallah which is the quran
Fourtly , if any one revert/muslim/non-muslim say u anything
Think 10 times before sharing it with other it might be .
Trueblood
1. You had tried to quote from the Quran, IS the reason why I posted initially (you are denying that you did in your response to me above)
2. Hindus, Christians, Jews etc come in all flavors just like "muslims" do. I am very involved in interfaith and have a lot of good friends from all religions. Just like I personally know and know of many "born muslims" who DO NOT believe in God/ Allah and proudly proclaim that "I am a muslim by name/birth only". Just the same way, if you actually READ their texts and talk to a variety of them, you will find that they DO believe in ONE God. Culturally, they have been raised to pray and believe differently.
Just keep your mind open, and you will see what I am saying, without judging all "non-muslims" - your 4th comment showed how narrow minded your thinking is. I have great appreciation for those who make the EFFORT to UNDERSTAND my religion and then conciously choose to revert.
And no, you did not make any points! Please I do not want to get into further discussions with you on this topic. this is not a competition as to who is right or wrong. there is always another viewpoint.
@ serendiputy..... I think u have missed something.... Those that the koran refer to as ''beleivers'' are those that beleive in the oneness of Allah and ALSO BELIEVE THAT MUHAMMAD IS THE LAST AND FINAL MASSENGER OF ALLAH, BELIEVE IN KORAN AS WORDS OF GOD, BELIEVE IN ALL THE MESSENGERS OF ALLAH (from adam down to abraham, moses, jesus and muhammad) AND BELIEVE IN THE DAY OF JUDGEMENT.. now the people that have this believe are termed as muslims.. You might argue that some believe in one God (eg jews, xtians, hindus etc)., but the question is do they believe in mohammad as massanger of God??, how will they find their way to God if they dont believe in His last and final massanger?? If they really believe in God why won't they beleive in his verses/ his words/ his massage ie the koran. . If they really seek to meet Allah, then Why won't they follow his light (ie the koran). they rather deny it and make mockery of it.... Allah said '''AND WHOEVER SEEKS A RELIGION OTHER THAN ISLAM, IT WILL NEVER BE ACCEPTED OF HIM, AND IN THE HEREAFTER HE WILL BE ONE OF THE LOSERS''' '''VERILLY, THOSE WHO DISBELIEVED, AND DIED WHILE THEY WERE DISBELIEVERS, THE EARTH FULL OF GOLD (wealth/riches) WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED FROM ANYONE OF THEM EVEN IF THEY OFFERED IT AS A RANSOM. FOR THEM IS A PAINFUL TORMENT AND THEY WILL HAVE NO HELPERS''' koran chapter3: verse 85and91.... . . . . . . . '''VERILY, THOSE WHO DISBELIEVE IN ALLAH AND HIS MASSANGERS AND WISH TO MAKE DISTINCTION BETWEEN ALLAH AND HIS MASSANGERS (by believing in Allah and disbelieving in some or all d massangers, eg the xtians dont believe in mohammad as a massanger of God, the jews didnt believe in some of d prophets, they went to extend of killing some prophets, the hindus, sikhs etc also dont believe in Allah's massengers) SAYING, WE BELIEVE IN SOME BUT REJECT OTHERS, AND WISH TO ADOPT A WAY IN BETWEEN.''' '''THEY ARE IN TRUTH DISBELIEVERS. AND WE HAVE PREPARED FOR THE DISBELIEVERS A HUMILIATING TORMENT''' koran4:150-151 .... Also there is an hadith of d prophet which is narrated by abu huraira ''ALLAH'S MESSENGER SAID: BY HIM(God) IN WHOSE HAND MUHAMMAD'S SOUL IS, THERE IS NONE FROM AMONGST THE JEWS AND THE CHRISTIANS (of these present nation) WHO HEARS ABOUT ME AND THEN DIES WITHOUT BELIEVING IN THE MASSAGE WITH WHICH I HAVE BEEN SENT (ie islamic monotheism), BUT HE(or she) WILL BE FROM THE DWELLERS OF THE (hell) FIRE. sahih muslim, book of faith, vol.1, hadith No.153. S.S.M.H20. . . . . . So my dear friend, when the koran speaks of the beleivers, it is literally and directly refering to muslims.. The best you can do to ur non muslim friends if u really love them is to invite them to islam so that they can be saved from hell fire and be with u in paradise/ blessed heaven (if at all u are a practising muslim and u are doing good deeds that will take u there)..
Serendipity, assalaamu alaikum,
The science of Tafseer is one that needs to be learnt. Mashallah you are aware of the fact that atleast terms like 'Muslim' and 'Mumin' are not synomyms, so clearly you know that there are certain things that differentiate the status of each. However, we need to get such information and tafseer from Scholars in our deen, especially the classical scholars who best understood this. And in fact, even comtemporary scholars agree on this with the classical scholars because it is something that was explained to RasoolAllah s.a.w by Jibraeel a.s. That hadith and many Quranic verses, specicially certain verses from Surah Hujurat, are used in defining what it means to a Muslim, Mumin AND Muhsin and the differences between them and this is not the job of ordinary 'muslims' like us.
I understand sometimes people say something to us and it makes us think but what the revert brother told you regarding the definition of Mumin is not quite correct. It may have initially appeared as quite an attractive point of view however, we need to step back and realise that such terms are not for a layman to define. Trust me I have seen muslims making their own opinions and shias adding belief in Ali (r.a.) to be a condion and just all sorts of incorrect definitions for what it means to be a Muslim/mumin.
I think most of us don't even bother approaching 'muhsin' because unforunately we know that we are all far from that, lol. *sigh*..astaghfirullah, May Allah help us become a good muslim, then mumin and then a muhsin, Ameen.
What in fact is the case is that the status of a Mumin is higher than that of a one who is just a Muslim. Look at it this way - every mumin is a muslim but not every muslim is a true mumin.
Scholars explain how first comes the level of being a Muslim - proclaiming your faith in the Shahada and acting upon the five pillar of Islam. However, then comes a Mumin who not only does all that a Muslim does but he/she is a level higher because he not only "submits" (Muslim) but he truely believes (imaan - mumin) with every fiber of his being in Allah and all that he has ordered and revelaed to us. Indeed we see many Muslims today but how many of us are true Mumins? We should question ourself, we are alhamdulillah happy to declare we are Muslims..but can the same be said about being a Mumin? I don't even want to start on Muhsin! But to cut it short and to know what a Muhsin is - its the Sahaba. That's the level a Muhsin is all about.
Brother Mohd is correct in that you cant be a momin if your not a Muslim; Your responses have somehow portrayed the view that you can be a 'mumin' without being a 'muslim' and that is incorrect. Infact, you have to first pass the first level - that of being a basic Muslim to get to the middle level of being a Mumin. And fortunate is he who gets to the highest level - that of a Muhsin.
Wallaho alim.
Was salaam
Jzk sister faith elaborating on my mumin and muhsin. I almost forgot that, well its a team work. Jzk once more
Salaams Muslim sister,
If you know your parents are not going to except this marriage and they only want to protect why you wasting your time sister. You are muslim and the religion means a lot to you don’t you think you should listen to them before you make a huge mistake. Our deen is there for a reason allah does not like displeasing children and you are being selfish in my opinion, your parents have already said no stop fighting it. Think about what’s really important here your parents and Allah so why you want to leave them for this hindu guy. Can you be 100% sure he will fulfil your needs vice vera to you? Can you be sure once he marries you continue to custom hindu traditions often this does happen people don’t actually mean what they say they only convert to make the other person happy and behind your back go to the temple etc. You already said you can’t leave your faith can he so do you think this marriage will work to me there be more barriers going against you then before especially when kids are involved.
To make things easier for yourself my advice to you is start finding a good muslim guy the one who you love or have feelings for and get married through the right channels. What’s wrong not finding your own muslim guy at least you wont have all these problems you are facing now. At least you have your identify intact and also not worrying about leaving your faith. Don’t turn against your parents their there to love and guide you to the right path. You are actually running after a relationship that will never accept you or neither of you in my opinion. Don’t do it your family will be ruined even if the guy says I will change because even asking a person to change does not happen or resolve the real issue facing you in the first place. I wish you the best and please forgive me, but I had to be honest w/salaams.
Dear Muslim Sister,
My response is no different to all the replies above.
You are amongst the believing women and so you or any muslim girl is not allowed to marry a non-muslim man. Please become firm in your deen and leave this guy.
And if this guy really says that he is willing to become muslim then he should only become muslim not for your sake but for the sake of Allah (swt) only. Tobah but this guy or any human being is not greater than Allah (swt). You will be accountable for your deeds in the hereafter. Therefore, please do what Allah (swt) is expecting from you.
I know cases where non-muslim guys becomes muslim only to marry a muslim girl but after a month or so, these guys goes back to their old kuffar ways. so what are the chances that this guy wont be celebrating diwali, holi, karwachaat, deshera, rakee after marriage?!!!
A revert normally has to prove a lot to muslims that he is a muslim than muslim born- I hope you understand what I am trying to say.
Please separate- break all contacts with/ leave this guy and if in a year or so time he has practised Islam whole-heartly then you can propose to him. To me at the moment his intention is to be with you forver that he is willing to revert to Islam for the sake of his Love (i.e. you) and not for the sake of Allah (swt). So please let this guy choose Islam sincerely for himself first and then inshaAllah eventually you
Don't play around with your only one life! Please realise that your muslim and don't wrong urself by marrying a hindu guy.
Whosoever leaves something for the sake of Allah then Allah, the Mighty and Magnificent, will replace it with something better than it. (Ahmad)
May Allah (swt) makes it easy for you and guide you as well as all sincere mankind (those who truely trying to find Allah (swt) day and night out) to siratul mustaqeem. ameen.
Parveen
-x-
Salaamu'alaykum sister in faith
please allow me to tell you about legendary ansaari woman from the sahaabiyaat who was put in the exact same position as you were, whom Allaah is pleased with.
Her name is Al-Ghumaysaa or Ar-Rumaysaa or Ramlah or Sahlah, better known as Umm sulaim bintu milhaan an-najjaariyyah al Awsiyyah Al-ansaariyyah [ whom Allaah is pleased with].
she was the mother of Anas ibn maalik [ra], the close companion, Scholar, servant of the propeht[saww].
she was one of the few women of the ansaar whom accepted islaam at the hands of Mus'ab ibn 'Umair [ whom Allaah is very pleased with].
Umm sulaim was married to a rich bussiness man called maalik ibn nadhar, when he heard she became muslimah, he didnot like it at all, he started to abuse her, insult her, shout at her, and even started violence in the house, but she stood her ground and was patient.she kept on calling him to the deen, but he would reply very rudely, and she would tell him that he just couldnot comprehend the treasure she found [islaam].
then maalik got even more angryabusive when Umm sulaim started teaching her son Anas about Allaah and his religion, so one day maalik went out to one of his bussiness trips in syria, and he was murdered and robbed by some of his enemies.
after anas's father died, she dedicated him to the prophet[saww] to be his servant and to be with him all day for 10 years, and because of her sacrife, anas [ra] narrated 1000s of ahadeeth that we couldnot have known about.
this is from the womans virtues
so it was known in madeenah that Umm sulaim was a widow, and umm sulaim was not just any regular woman, she was the only woman whom the men fought over, competed to marry.
so the elite came and proposed to her, and amongst them, was a young handsome man called Abuu Talhah zayd who was a kaafir till now.
Abuu talhah was one of those fortunate men whom every woman dreams to have in her lap.
he was one of those lucky men who WoWwed everysingle woman in the city.
he was young
he was handsome
he was very rich/wealthy
he was of noble/good manners
he was a ladies man
he was very charming
he was generous
he was loving
he was caring
he was romantic with women
he was intelligent
he was of good leneage
he was physically built
he was strong/brave
he was tall
he was a cheif of his clan
he was loved by his clan/people
he was a night
he was a night in shinning armour [literally]
he always smelt of the BEST/MOST EXPENSIVE perfumes available
he just had everything in this world
he just had it aaaaaaall as they say.
except eemaan, which is everything.
So when young Abuu talhah heard about Umm sulaim, and her desirable quilities she possesed such as patience, looks, intelligence, good manners etc, he went to propose to her.
so he went to Umm sulaim, and asked for her hand.
Umm sulaim was very flabbergasted, happy by this gesture.
and she replied "oh abuu talhah, i am like all other women, i would love to have you,I swear by Allaah your kind is never ever rejected, any sane woman would not reject you, BUT I AM A BELIEVING WOMAN, AND YOU ARE A DISBELIEVING MAN, YOU ARE NOT HALAAL FOR ME"
so abuu talhah, thought it was about money, and did not take her seriously, so he ran to his house and got gold and silver, and laid them out infront of umm sulaim, BUT SHE REPEATED THE SAME ANSWER, your kind is not rejected, but you are a disbeliever, leave.
so he left and kept comming back, untill she said to him, that her mahr would be his islaam [if he becomes muslim] and she did not want any yellow or white metals [gold and silver]
and then after a while he studied the deen and became one of the best ansaar and full of eemaan.may allaah be pleased with him
and umm sulaim got the most extraordinary mahr there could be in history.
but the mushaahid here is that DESPITE HOW DESPERATE Umm sulaim was to marry abu talhah and how much she fell in love with him, she was always loyal to her lord first and foremost as she knew that it is him [swt] who give and provide spouses.and she put her trust in Allaah.
so Allaah provided her a dream husband from where she could not expect.
Allaah promised in the qur'aan
"and whomsoever fears Allaah, he will make for him an exit, and he will provide him with sustainance without measure"
and whomsoever fears Allaah, he will make/gather his affairs easy for him"
so please sister, be like umm sulaim, and turn him down, Allaah has made it obligatory upon himself to find you a better husband, or if he becomes muslim, you will have a happy life together inshaallaah.
the prophet[saww] said;
i entered paradise and heard some footsteps and said who is that, it was said that is Al-Ghumaysaa/Ar-Rumaysaa" [Umm Sulaim] may Allaah be pleased with her.
umm sulaim also participated in the pledge of pleasure.
the prophet[saww] said those who participated in the bay'atu-ridwaan, the pledge of pleasure were
all going to paradise and forbidden from the hellfire, EXCEPT the man with the red camel.
umm sulaim, the perfect muslimah!
sallam
lovely i learnt something new i didnt know about the pleadge of pleasure!
Allah hafiz
As salam wkum wr wb,
sister first u must know what love is,
love cannot happen before marriage,
yes likeness is possible but today what we like not necessary dat 2morrow it will be. Situations change all likes and dislikes.
dont take wrong decision and bfore taking any decision think how u will face it on aaqirah infront of allah.
life is short...live it how allah and his mssgr commanded.
that guy is not actually ready to convert but he fulfillinf the criteria to get marry u.
and by the way how come u concluded that ur life with muslim guy to whom ur parent will arange marriage will not love u?
Allah baritala says it better for muslimah to marry a slave muslim man rather than a nonmuslim guy-surah nisa
may allah show us all of us right path and make us powerfull to overcome our desires-nafs
ameen
Brother mohd and faith thanku for elaborating the issue in a better way to sister serendipity
Secondly , I meant by my 4th comment that u should share , your thoughts or views which does not create contradiction nothing more than that ,
but anyone is more than welcome to clear their doubts
Jkl sister faith for elaborating on mumin and muhsin. I almost forgot that, well it's a team work. Jkl once more
hi to you all, as you all know the quraan didn't actually said a muslim women can't marry a man of the book (je, christian) so why is it forbidin, is it because of the law or? since i was child i was told to fallow what quraan says so i learnt all the quran and the meaning of it, and yet t never mentioned that, so guys please tell me where getting ur sources from. thank you
Yes, the Quran does contain such a prohibition.
1. - ``Do not marry [your daughters] to idolaters until they believer in Islam. A believering slave is better than a [free] idolater, though the latter please you. These call you to the Fire, but Allah calls you, by His will, to the Garden and to forgiveness. He makes plain His revelations to mankind, that perhaps they will think'' (Qur'an, 2:221)
All the scholars agree that the term "mushrikeen" in this ayah applies to all non-Muslims.
2. ``If you find them believers, do not return them to the disbelievers [kufar]; they are not lawful to the disbelievers, nor are the disbelievers lawful to them'' (Qur'an, 60:10).
The phrase `disbelievers' [kuffar] includes the People of the Book [Ahl al-Kitab] because the Qur'an applied the name `those who disbelieve' [alladhina kafaru] to them: ``Those who disbelieve among the People of the Book and the polytheists [mushrikin] will not desist until a clear proof comes to them'' (Qur'an, 98:1).
There are other proofs. Many articles have been written about this.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Sister z I really Thanku for explaining me the concept of a muslim reaction should be when someone makes immature comments .
Had it not been so I would have not quell my anger , and would have defenatly said something stupid again (to HK offcourse)
Thanku sister z , its really saves time and energy not to reply to immature ppl
Hope I can apply this in real world like in the network world
brother Wael and respected mod
Well I don't think to say something cheap but this guy HK , is just over here to throw immaturity and disrupt the sensitivity of the site and commentors. With no purpose of helping .
Dude if u have a point say it in a manner accepted by all
Coming to the point either warn him or ban him .
Hey dear as salam.......
1st of all i would like to tell dat il pray to allah let ur problems get solved insha allah ameen...but m v sad to tell that even m going through d same situation d person who loves me is hindu and he is ready to convert in islam and he is also ready to leave his family forever and now the main problem is my family they just hate him .right now am pursuing my final year engineering after that my family would definetly force me to get married according to their choice of boy coz i have 3 other younger sisters after me but i really cant do it i cant marry anyone else am jus going mad thinking about my future all the time am not able to concentrate on my studies nor on anything plz plz plz sister remember me in ur precious dua il do d same for u allah hafeez take care...
assalam everyone,
i understand the situation being discussed here and i would like to raise a question( not related to the matter of marrying a non muslim guy/gal) here to all the people who have provided the solid proof-ful example related answers.
My question is that it is rightly said that without Allah's will not a single leaf could move even and every human being on this earth is Allah's creation. Now comes the question comes to me is that why do non-muslims exist in this world? Why do people who dont believe Allah are not extinct till now. If Allah hates them all why are they still alive, rather flourishing and happy in various parts of this world? Now my brothers and sisters will quote that these non-believers would be punished on the Judgement day. But there are innumerable non-believers who are unknowingly following Allah's shown path and doing miracles in Humanity and still have Allah's mercy on them. Will they all definitely enter Hell?
Only Allah knows the reason behind they (non-believers) are still alive.
Also i would like to quote here that Allah has created so many species of plants and animals on this earth for maintaining the balance of this earth. why did a Allah create more than one species of roses? why are there more than one species of elephants?
Every creation of Allah on this earth serves a purpose of which we might not be completely aware of?
Non-believers are also Human beings and just mis-guided coz of their birth place. They should be given a chance. And Let Allah decide the follow-up events. people all here dont know what is Allah's will for the next second?? Do you?
Walaykumsalaam,
Brother, you said: "Why do people who dont believe Allah are not extinct till now. If Allah hates them all why are they still alive.
Where did you get this from? You have a very confused understanding. Allah Almighty does not hate his creation, astagfirullaah. Allah is the Lord and Creator of everyone, Muslims and Non-Muslims. He listens to the duas of all of us, He is the One who grants all our duas and has blessed us with everything we have. All of us Muslims and non Muslims, we all eat from the same sources, we earn from the same sources, we see, we hear, we smile, we laugh - all these and many more uncountable blessings are from Allah. So how do you say Allah hates non believers. Never.
Allah wants us to see the truth, that is why He(swt) has given us signs and miracles to ponder and reflect. And furthermore, everyone will be rewarded for the good they do, whether they are Muslim or not. Who will go to Jannah and who will not is known only by Allah - this is not for you or I to judge.
We live in a world where we are all one Ummah, some of us tied together by Islam, and all of us tied together through our bond of humanity. It is not 'us' and 'them', it is 'we'. And if some of us have been blessed with the understanding of the true faith of Islam, it is our duty to spread this message to the rest of humanity and to help them see the truth. We will be held accountable more than the unbelievers. Why? Because we knew the message, so did we spread it to the others?
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
sisterZ...you said'"Where did you get this from? You have a very confused understanding. Allah Almighty does not hate his creation, astagfirullaah. Allah is the Lord and Creator of everyone, Muslims and Non-Muslims. He listens to the duas of all of us, He is the One who grants all our duas and has blessed us with everything we have. All of us Muslims and non Muslims, we all eat from the same sources, we earn from the same sources, we see, we hear, we smile, we laugh - all these and many more uncountable blessings are from Allah. So how do you say Allah hates non believers. Never."
Sister i wanted to say the same thing. I just said it in the question manner.. I know Allah loves his creations whether believers or non-believers. All will go to jannah in accordance to the good deeds they do.
So that is what i wanted to ask that how come a muslim who loves a non-muslim( which is also Allah's creation) go to hell just because of the reason that he/she loves a non-believer..???
If the non-believer is a good person and by Allah's blessing flourishing, why cant a muslim marry a non-muslim??
Please guide!!
It is stated specifically in the Qur'an that a Muslim woman cannot marry a non-Muslim. Muslims believe that the words of the Qur'an are from Allah (swt), Himself. Therefore to not abide by his decree, the Muslim woman would knowingly be committing a sin.
Thus, the marriage could not be conducted Islamically and her marriage would be void. Each time she is with this man who is a non-mahram, she would commit a sin. Any sexual acts would be considered fornication and the children would be considered as illegitimate children, and would suffer from not bearing any Islamic rights from their father. All Islamic teachings of the children would falter in this relationship because of the open sin of the parents and because the father, as a non-believer may lead them astray or not be able to teach Islamic principles correctly. For if he is living in sin and fornicating with the mother, the lessons of Islam would be tainted by this fact of obeying Allah (swt) when they have disregarded the teachings of Allah (swt) from the beginning.
Hell is a destination for those who openly disobey and sin in front of Allah (swt) and do not repent, i.e. leaving the sin. For the Muslim woman married to a non-Muslim, every day she is accruing sin upon her book of deeds openly, which is a form of spite to Allah (swt). An open sin is worse than a private sin as it causes dissension, open disobedience and the people are knowingly exposing themselves every day of this disallowed relationship.
Her open fornicating and sharing the bed and living space with a non-Mahram male (remember that their marriage is not Islamically valid) may also corrupt other Muslim women, as well. It may influence her daughters to do the same and led those grandchildren even farther astray.
In essence, the Muslim woman knows better and this is the path in which she would encounter the Wrath of Allah (swt), because her non-repentance in her actions, despite her words, would cause her to be judged accordingly.
For any man that truly loved her, they would no want to see her disobey her Lord for their temporary pleasure in this world.
My initial sentence should have read the polytheist. I need an editor.
1. “And do not marry polytheistic women until they believe. And a believing slave woman is better than a polytheist, even though she might please you. And do not marry polytheistic men [to your women] until they believe. And a believing slave is better than a polytheist, even though he might please you.” [Qur’an 2:221]
This verse would exclude the Hindu male as a marriage partner.
a/w
I do not Understand that why people are no negative in their thoughts? Can you not ever try to look towards the positive side of something?
My brother stated that ,'Her open fornicating and sharing the bed and living space with a non-Mahram male (remember that their marriage is not Islamically valid) may also corrupt other Muslim women, as well. It may influence her daughters to do the same and led those grandchildren even farther astray."
Why cant you see this side of things that might unfold? That the non-believer seeing the true belief of his wife starts learning more about Islam and starts understanding the difference. The rest of his family also starts understanding what truly the message Muslims have for the world. By Allah's blessings , they convert. All of you know that when someone close to you explains you about something , you take it more seriously because you believe that person and know that person cares about you. What if after marriage and learning from the faith of girl, the boy (a non-believer) family convert to Islam because in that way she would not be forcing anyone and the non-believers of the boy's family would repent their sins and convert. That is the gradual process by which you can make someone better understand. Secondly, making a single person convert to Islam is rewarded by Allah by good deeds equivalent to Hajj. Isn't the girl going into that family for a noble cause??
I understand that it has been clearly stated in Quran that a Muslim girl cannot marry a Hindu boy or a non-muslim boy. People here have quoted the verses too. I would like to ask you a simple question? To every one here , do you claim yourself to be the messenger of Allah who without any doubt exactly knows what Allah wants us do? What if Allah stated this to make us forbid to marry non-muslims who dont believe Allah only? What about Hindus who dont believe in Idol worship any more? they just believe that there is just one supreme power but dont have anyone to guide them?the times are changing we need to people the right path.
As SisterZ rightly quoted that, ' We live in a world where we are all one Ummah, some of us tied together by Islam, and all of us tied together through our bond of humanity. It is not 'us' and 'them', it is 'we'. And if some of us have been blessed with the understanding of the true faith of Islam, it is our duty to spread this message to the rest of humanity and to help them see the truth. We will be held accountable more than the unbelievers. Why? Because we knew the message, so did we spread it to the others?"
For the sake of Humanity , You cant just stand Against any step to be taken in this world for its betterment.. YOU DONT KNOW WHO WILL MAKE IT TO HELL OR HEAVEN? ITS MY ALLAH WHO KNOWS EVERYTHING? HE ONLY KNOWS THE REASON BEHIND EVERYTHING HAPPENING IN THIS WORLD?
Allah ke marzi ke bina toh ek patta bhi nahi hilta( without Allah's will not a single event could unfold on this Earth), then why does a believer fall in love with a non-believer? You are not eligible to claim to tell the true reason..
w/s
You've made a mistake, if you think you can achieve goodness through your sin. If Allah (swt) makes something a sin, who are you to assume you can turn that around and foster goodness out of it? That is the fundamental flaw in your reasoning. You expect to be the vessel in which Allah (swt) needs? No. Allah (swt) will do what He pleases and you make the greater mistake of thinking that if those people converted, you were a necessary part of that. Allah (swt) chooses who He wants to convert, but can do it without you. Allah (swt) is the Greatest with no partner. Be careful what you think you can attribute to yourself. That is the path of shirk. Where is the nobility in that?
As I heard someone say, in Islam, the ends do not justify the means. And if you believe in Allah (swt) and love Him first, then you wouldn't sin. It's like robbing a bank: you can't make dua for a successful robbery so that you can give a part of it to charity.
To your last question I can answer it, because you make another mistake. You forgot about "free will." Your love only exists in the same realm as misery and tragedy of mankind or happiness and victory of mankind, by the mere Mercy of Allah (swt). However, He has given mankind the ability of free will. You can jump off a building tomorrow. Is that a part of Allah's (swt) plan? It's your free will to either sin or obey Him. Don't try to blame your incapacity to follow His Path on Him. That's a dangerous assertion.
You think you can spread the religion through sin? Did the Prophet of Islam do that? No. So what makes you think that you can do something he refused to do by His love of Allah (swt)?
Careful of what you imagine of yourself.
Writer of this comment,
Did you magic yourself into existence? No, rather you were created like everything else. So our Creator is the One who places restrictions for our benefit. Look around you at everything around you. Our existence is not superficial. There is so much more behind it. May Allah open your eyes and guide you to the truth.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Respected Proffessor X...... I think you must read the followin article first and then i give your opinon...For the Motion – Nadia S. Mohammad – “Muslim women should be able to marry non-Muslim men”
When Huma Abedin, aide to Hilary Clinton, married Anthony Weiner, New York Congressman, it sent tongues wagging in the Muslim community. She did the unthinkable, the ultimate taboo for a good Muslim girl from a good Muslim family – she married a Jew… and he did not convert. O-M-G. The question that makes even the most open-minded Imams squirm was revived – Can a Muslim woman marry a non-Muslim man? The answer in all the major schools of thought has traditionally been a resounding NO. Absolutely, not. Not ever. Haraam, sister.
The response only begs the next question, but why? It is not prohibited in the Qur’an. Few modern scholars feel comfortable forbidding it for that reason. Yet, few are actually willing to articulate this in an official forum. Dr. Abou El Fadl is an example of a scholar who has openly and candidly addressed the issue of Muslim women marrying “men of the Book.” In his response he explains his dislike of the issue and his tendency to avoid answering the question. He describes the traditional thought and then goes on to mention that he, personally, finds the evidence regarding the prohibition to be weak and does not feel comfortable telling a woman she cannot marry a kitabiyya [People of the Book.]
I am not a scholar, but Dr. Fadl’s response echoes the sentiments I have heard from other scholars as well. As such, the bases for this opinion are two ayats [Qu’ran verses], the opinions of scholars I have questioned, and my own research. This opinion does not apply to marriages where one converts to another’s faith. Additionally, for the purposes of this discussion I recognize that we live in a patriarchal society and I am not contesting the traditional roles ascribed to men and women as per our cultural patriarchy.
What God Says: Qur’anic Law
The Qur’an addresses marriage to non-Muslims in two instances :
1. “And do not marry polytheistic women until they believe. And a believing slave woman is better than a polytheist, even though she might please you. And do not marry polytheistic men [to your women] until they believe. And a believing slave is better than a polytheist, even though he might please you.” [Qur’an 2:221]
2. “And [lawful in marriage are] chaste women from among the believers and chaste women from among those who were given the Scripture before you, when you have given them their due compensation, desiring chastity, not unlawful sexual intercourse or taking [secret] lovers.” [Qur’an 5:5]
There are several absolute truths we can establish from these two ayats. The first is that a differentiation is made between non-Muslim “People of the Book” (those of the Judeo-Christian faith) and non-Muslim polytheists. This distinction determines that both men and women are not permitted to marry anyone who associates another god with God. That is pretty straightforward and not to be contested. The next point is that men are permitted to marry chaste Muslim, Jewish or Christian women when certain duties are upheld. We generally accept this at face value as our right to marry. We also accept from this that though Muslim women are not directly addressed, if Muslim men are given permission to marry Muslim women then naturally, Muslim women can marry Muslim men. The Qur’an does not provide further guidance on whether Muslim women can marry men “of the Book.”
The Issue
This leads us to the issue at hand – can we assume that the reverse is true for Muslim women marrying Judeo-Christian men?
• If not, can we forbid Muslim women from marrying a Christian or Jewish man?
• If yes, what does that mean in our patriarchal structure?
What People Say: Traditional Thought
Traditionally, the answer has been no, the reverse situation cannot be assumed for Muslim women. The argument is that if men are expressly given permission to marry women of the Book then women must also be given express permission in order to do the same. All major schools of thought accept this ruling. Many provide justifications as to why this traditional view has been upheld. The justification for this view fall primarily along these lines: 1) preservation of the Ummah [Muslim Community], 2) the father establishes religion for his children, 3) loss of certain rights as a Muslim woman, 4) implications on family law.
1) Preservation of the Ummah
Since we live in a patriarchal system there is a need to maintain a certain order under that system. The family lineage is passed through the father so if Muslim women marry outside the Muslim community this would, somehow, impede the growth of the Ummah as a whole.
2) Religion stems from the father
Children are most often recognized by their father’s name, culture, traditions, customs, beliefs, etc. In most customs, a woman marries into a family, not the other way around. In many instances the woman will even move into the husband’s family home. In such scenarios, not only is the father’s beliefs and legacy passed on in a symbolic sense, the father’s family and culture also exert a great influence over the children. This view that religion stems from the father is also used to support the notion that Muslim men may marry a kitabiyya, while Muslim women cannot.
3) Loss of rights
Islam ensures certain rights to women, which in an interfaith marriage cannot be guaranteed because the husband is under no obligation to ensure these rights are protected. This includes, but is not limited to, the right to freely practice her faith, the right to a mehr , the right to keep her name after marriage, the right to retain her earnings, the right to have her husband provide for her and their children, etc. Again, this is not thought to be an issue for Muslim men marrying outside of the faith because, the patriarchal household is accepted as the norm. Thus, as part of his duties, a Muslim husband is expected to provide for his family, uphold the rights of his wife and not prevent her from practicing her faith. He is also prohibited from forcing his wife to be Muslim. The fear, however, is that a non-Muslim husband heading a household would not be obliged to do the same, placing the woman at a disadvantage.
4) Implications on family law
Islamic law provides guidance regarding various topics within family law. This is of particular significance in regards to interfaith marriages as it includes matters of divorce, child custody, and inheritance. A concern for some scholars is that if Muslim women marry outside the faith, not only would they lose their God-given rights, but also, Islamic family law would not be able to address the issues that may arise.
Come On, Really…?
The notion that the Ummah is somehow preserved through the offspring of Muslim men is culturally archaic. The spread of Islam has been through its message, and its growth is maintained through the belief of its followers. A man’s family name, traditions and faith are passed to his children only in a symbolic sense. Their decision to follow or not follow his ways stem from a number of factors, and is ultimately governed by their personal choice. There are further inconsistencies in the reasoning given by those who purport this rule in light of patriarchal tradition. If we maintain that men are the head of households and carry on family legacy, then we also support the notion that women are the primary caretakers and nurturers. Thus, religion and culture are more likely to be passed through the mother. This is especially true of the common nuclear family in America, where the children are solely under the care and supervision of the mother, not the father’s extended family. It simply does not make sense that a practicing Muslim mother would not raise her children as Muslims. It makes even less sense that a non-Muslim mother could be expected to raise her children as Muslim.
The aforementioned justifications speak to an Islamically ideal situation – a marriage between a Muslim man and Muslim woman where both care for and respect each other and live in wedded bliss for the sake of Allah in a Muslim majority country with his upstanding Muslim family. It assumes that by marrying a kitabiyya a Muslim woman is forgoing this wedded bliss. It also assumes that if she marries a Muslim man she will be in an Islamically ideal situation. Both assumptions are just not realistic.
If a Muslim woman finds a practicing man of God who respects her better than the Muslim men around her and with whom she connects with better as well, why should anyone stop her from marrying him? Even if we are to presume that all the single available Muslim men of America are Islamically ideal men and a Muslim woman would be crazy to reject all these potential Muslim suitors – if she chooses to marry a kitabiyya, she does not lose any wifely rights in this country, at least. The beauty of Islam is that it guaranteed a minimum standard for women at a time when there was no standard. We are fortunate enough to live in a society where these basic rights and more are upheld by law.
The concern that a shift in traditional thought will have implications in Islamic law is understandable, but should not be considered a threat to our Islamic traditions. Islamic law is not divine and it is not set in stone. It is a man-made interpretation of divine doctrine and tradition. It is a living body of law and should be treated as such. Implying that the fear of readdressing Islamic family law is enough to forbid all Muslim women from marrying outside the faith is just lazy. A body of law requires constant thought and analysis in order to develop. There are many Islamic scholars who recognize the need for development in Islamic legal theory, and are uncomfortable upholding traditions that are not prescribed in the Qur’an, yet few are willing to voice that opinion. When it comes to the rights of women we need to remember that Islam provided a floor, not a ceiling, and we must be careful of twisting something into haraam that is not expressly prohibited.
Soooo…
Ideally, most of us want and expect to marry a Muslim. It simplifies a lot of complications in our minds regarding marriage and family. But the reality is that in our society we have an increased chance of meeting and marrying a non-Muslim. Huma’s choice may have made the news. But men do it all the time. We accept their decision, as it is their choice, their right. We don’t analyze all the possible outcomes it may or may not have on the future of his children and the Ummah. So why are we prohibiting women from observing the same right when it is not prohibited in the Qur’an? And why are we prohibiting it with outdated justifications?
At most, the traditional justifications provide evidence that marrying kitabiyya is discouraged, not that it is forbidden. The choice is left to the believer.
Renowned scholar Tariq Ramadan said it best. When asked how he would react if one of his children married a non-Muslim, he replied:
“I would naturally prefer someone to share the principles of being a Muslim. But it’s their choice. Look, by then, I will have done what I have had to do [as a father]. I have transmitted my principles to them. So I say to them, know who you are and your values. When you know this, then you are free. “
Allah knows best.
I read that recently. It draws the wrong conclusion because she is unable to understand the Qur'an, it's tasfeer and hadiths, not to mention that she is ignoring Islamic History at the time of the Prophet. She's neither a scholar, she doesn't understand the text and she's referencing a marriage from what I know concerns a non-practicing Muslim and Jewish man who later took lewd photos of himself and sent them to various women.
The latter fact makes this article all the more silly.
a/s
Now Proffesor X you said that"You've made a mistake, if you think you can achieve goodness through your sin. If Allah (swt) makes something a sin, who are you to assume you can turn that around and foster goodness out of it? That is the fundamental flaw in your reasoning. You expect to be the vessel in which Allah (swt) needs? No. Allah (swt) will do what He pleases and you make the greater mistake of thinking that if those people converted, you were a necessary part of that. Allah (swt) chooses who He wants to convert, but can do it without you. Allah (swt) is the Greatest with no partner. Be careful what you think you can attribute to yourself."
Allah is the greatest of all.
Let me tell you a true story of a muslim girl and a non-muslim boy. The boy being discussed here was not a polytheist. He was Hindu by birth but never visited temples, nor practised idol worship. This boy's best friend was a muslim in whose family this boy spent most of his childhood. He kept fast in ramadan even though he was a non-believer. He went to read namaz with his muslim friend on fridays and on Eid. He was a better human-being than most of the corrupted by-birth muslims. But he unfortunately could not convert initially becuase of family pressure.This girl unknowingly came to his city and he fell in love with her. The girl remained reluctant in accepting the relationship but agreed upon later seeing the goodwill and true love of this non-believer. This boy was even close to the girls family because he helped the girl in building her career and cared for her as his father. When they broke out the news to their families, the boy's family accepted the girl without asking her to change her religion and the girl's family too agreed to accept the boy after a little hesitation. l am calling little because they knew that boy was not a polytheist and they loved their daughter. They got married by both Hindu and Muslim traditions.Later the boy who really loved the girl and learned from every thing she did and believed , converted to Muslim. He describes that had this girl not come in her life, he would have never found the right path. Did the girl really do sin?
Now as you earlier said Mr. professor X that if i want i could jump off a cliff.. Why say Allah did that? It is not a place to quote such high degree examples. What i meant was that it was Allah(swt) who brought this girl into this boy's life. Allah only chooses on whom he wants the light to be shower. But he does give every non-believer a chance in their lives. The reason behind what , why something is happening in this world is a something which neither you nor can i state ever.Allah(swt) knows it all. Just always try to see the good in evreything. being a pessimist is not good.
Your arrogance to prove that your point of view is the rightest is not doing any good in the name of islam. Go spread the message what Allah has bestowed upon you to others. You must choose that and not think that if Allah(swt) wants xyz to convert to islam, then xyz would wake up one day and just change. Dont shirk your responsibility and it is righty said that being a Good Muslim you must have the following attribute in you personality.
The duty of the Muslim towards a non-Muslim includes a number of things:
Firstly:
Da‘wah or calling him to Allah, may He be glorified and exalted. He should call him to Allah and explain to him the reality of Islam when possible, with regard to whatever issues he has knowledge about, because this is the greatest kindness that he can give to his fellow-citizens and to those whom he meets of Jews, Christians and others who may be mushrikeen (polytheists), because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The one who guides others to goodness will have a reward like that of the one who does it.” And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said to ‘Ali (may Allah be pleased with him), when he sent him to Khaybar and instructed him to call the Jews to Islam: “By Allah, if Allah were to guide one man through you, that would be better for you than having red camels (the best kind).” And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever calls others to right guidance will have a reward like that of those who follow him, without that detracting from their reward in the slightest.”
So calling him (the non-Muslim) to Islam, conveying Islam to him and being sincere towards him in that are among the best means of drawing close to Allah.
Secondly:
He should not wrong him, with regard to his physical wellbeing, his wealth or his honour. If he is a dhimmi (non-Muslim living under Muslim rule), musta’man (one who is granted security in a Muslim land) or mu‘aahid (one with whose country the Muslims have a peace deal), then he should give him his due rights, and not transgress against his wealth by stealing, betraying or deceiving, and he should not harm him physically by striking or killing him, because the fact that he is a mu‘aahid or dhimmi, or musta’man, means that he is protected by sharee‘ah.
Thirdly:
There is no reason why we should not interact with him, buying, selling, renting, hiring and so on. It is narrated in saheeh reports that the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) bought from kuffaar who were idol worshippers, and he bought from the Jews, and these are interactions. When he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) died, his shield was being held in pledge by a Jew for some food he had bought for his family (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him).
Fourthly:
With regard to greeting, the Muslim should not initiate the greeting, but he may return it, because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Do not initiate the greeting of salaam with the Jews or Christians.” And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “If the people of the Book greet you with salaam (by saying al-salaamu ‘alaykum), say ‘Wa ‘alaykum.’” So the Muslim should not initiate the greeting to a kaafir, but if the kaafir initiates it, and the Jew or Christians etc. greets you with salaam, then you should say “wa ‘alaykum,” as the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said.
These are some of the rights between a Muslim and a kaafir.
Another right is being a good neighbour. So if he is a neighbour, be kind to him and do not annoy him; give charity to him if he is poor, give him gifts, give him beneficial advice, because these are things that will attract him to Islam and to become Muslim; and because the neighbour has rights. The Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Jibreel kept urging me to be kind to my neighbour until I thought that he would make him my heir.” Saheeh - agreed upon. If the neighbour is a kaafir, he still has the rights of a neighbour; if he is both a relative and a kaafir, then he has two rights: the rights of a neighbour and the rights of a relative.
One of the rights of the neighbour is that you should give him charity, but not zakaah, if he is poor, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Allaah does not forbid you to deal justly and kindly with those who fought not against you on account of religion nor drove you out of your homes. Verily, Allaah loves those who deal with equity” [al-Mumtahanah 60:8]. According to the saheeh hadeeth narrated from Asma’ bint Abi Bakr (may Allah be pleased with her), her mother, who was a mushrik, entered upon her during the truce between the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) and the people of Makkah, seeking help. Asma’ asked the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) for permission - should she uphold ties of kinship with her? The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Uphold ties of kinship with her.”
But with regard to celebrating their festivals, the Muslim should not take part in celebrating their festivals, but there is nothing wrong with offering them condolences if a loved one dies, such as saying “May Allah compensate you in your loss” and other kind words. But he should not say “May Allah forgive him” or “May Allah have mercy on him” if the deceased was a kaafir, and he should not pray for the deceased if he was a kaafir. But he may pray for the one who is alive to be guided and to be compensated and so on. End quote.
Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allah have mercy on him).
Fataawa Noor ‘ala al-Darb, 1/289-291.
Also remember,
Respect the opinion of others. No opinions can be "bad" or "stupid". You should treat them as gems, or learn to derive gems from them. Without opinions, things will never get better. If you do not like an idea, do not invalidate it right away; instead, add on to the idea to improve it.
I am signing off now because debating with a brother in islam would either do no good..
w/s
Yes, by marrying him before he became Muslim, the girl did sin. That's clear. You can argue the polemics, but it's a sin, nevertheless. It doesn't matter what people approved of, because it does not change God's law. Your contention about the boy's belief before he took shahada could be argued by an agnostic if they did the same and for example, some Christians and non-Muslims fast. But if they fornicate with a Muslim girl, it's still a sin. In fact, the actual nikkah would be invalid because of it, which means if they didn't remarry with a proper nikkah, they are still in sin.
If they do not seek forgiveness, then they are making lite of God's law. I'm not sure why this is hard to understand. Anytime they copulated, this was fornication before he became Muslim. Your story has no bearing on this fact. You cannot pick and choose what you wish to follow whenever you so please. This is not a hard concept to understand. When you disobey Allah (swt), you sin. Simple.
Your examples about da'wah doesn't involve sin, does it? Da'wah can be given, but not through sin.
An opinion is fine, as long as it does not contradict God's law.
There's no debate here really. You're trying to justify and support a sin. I am not.
Sister "I Love Allah and his Creation";
All points considered I would like to point out a few things here;
In Islam their is a certain way of preaching to non-Muslims and their are rules to go about this. If you are saying that we should marry non-Muslims to preach them Islam through how we practice it then your reasoning is flawed because it doesn't happen that way mostly. Like you said that "Allah (swt) shows right path to whomsoever He wishes" then if we have this much belief in Allah then we should follow HIS rules too without making exceptions to fit our own desires. It likes as Atheist say; where is God/Allah when their is so much killing, injustice, exploitation going on in the world? Answers is that who is following God/ Allah today; much like when you buy a product it comes with an instruction manual. If you don't read the manual and damage it without having proper/prior knowledge of how to operate it; then you can't blame the maker; can you?
Secondly, the statement miss Nadia quoted here is absolutely taken out of context;
He didn't say that if his DAUGHTER married a non-Muslim (be it Jew, Christian, Hindu etc etc) but any of his CHILDREN so, sorry this doesn't apply to this situation as in one of his videos where he was asked kind of similar question on inter-faith marriages (raised by a sister); he said it's not allowed in this day and age especially for those Muslims who are living in non-Muslim lands as being a minority. I will see if I can find that video to post it; in fact he is one of those scholars who strongly opposes a Muslim man marrying non-Muslim woman (Jews and Christians; people of book).
Also, their is no love before marriage and after marriage bigger then the love of Allah (swt) and His Prophet (PBUH); if we follow the rules (without picking and choosing) then it's impossible to fall in love with someone of opposite gender (be a Muslim or non-Muslim). Secondly, if we love Allah (swt) and His Messenger (PBUH) and hold them close to our heart then we will do things which will please THEM not to anger them.
As Professor X stated means we use to achieve end results do matter; for instance as we see too often that a lot of Muslims sell drugs, spirits or involve in other activities which are absolutely forbidden in Islam. What if they use the money earned to build a mosque, run an orphanage, or support Muslim community in certain ways? Does you reasoning also think it's fine?
No one is supposed to judge anyone but it is our duty as Muslims to condemn when we see something is wrong as it is part of faith. This act of discouraging depends on situation.
Jazak Allah,
Muhammad1982.
Editor, IslamicAnswers.com
Hi Readers,
After going through all the preceedings paras, I have to comment as per my personal life experience. Though a muslim girl,yet married a Hindu boy, without changing my religion. I am so happy and grateful to the boy and his family, that they treated me like their own family member and it was my husband(that Hndu boy) that today I am a software engineer with one loving son.Whereas my other sisters who married muslim guys under family pressure, are leading a miserable life.They are not allowed to move freely, do jobs, to study and confined in burqa, having both 4 kid and their husbands useless fellows, conservative, disgraceful, disrespectful and giving threatening of talaks at times.At times their husbands come to me and my husband seeking financial assistance, which we extend, but when we ask them to allow their wives to do job, they get agitated.
Sabana,
That your hindu husband has a good character is not because he is non-Muslim; and that your brother in laws are disrespectful is not because they are Muslim. You are speaking as though all Muslim men are bad. This is not true, rather it is just cultural and media related rubbish that you seem to have fallen for.
You may be a Software Engineer - but so what? This is not going to help in the Hereafter. All the worldly academic achievements put together will not equal to 'Laa Illaaha IllAllaah'. You would be better off never marrying at all, than marrying a non-Muslim, because your current marriage is invalid, as a Muslim woman is not permitted to marry anyone but a Muslim man.
Try if you can to bring your hindu man to Islam. If he accepts Islam wholeheartedly, that would be much much better for you and your Hereafter.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Asalaam alaikum,
Lady Asiyah (sa) was married to pharaoh and endured much more than anything in your examples. She achieved Heaven and is considered one of the foremost women of Heaven. The difference in her case was that the law of Islam as per the time of the Holy Prophet had not been revealed and she suffered, was tortured and murdered by her husband. Yet, under all this duress she achieved a great level of iman in spite of not having the complete message of Islam.
So here you are with the advantage of having the complete message of Islam at hand, and yet freely married to a non-Muslim and seemingly happy about it in contravention to the Decree of Allah (swt). What is most telling about your worldly success is that you attribute all this to your husband. It becomes apparent that the last entity that you are thinking about when you wrote your post was Allah (swt).
You said you haven't changed your religion. I think we could make a good case to the contrary that what you have taken is our own laxity in religion wherein Allah (swt) plays second to your worldly desires and success.
By the way, my Muslim friends have very accomplished wives who are teachers, accountants, lawyers, engineers, doctors, etc., all while raising their numerous children who are a delight to the eyes. They are all married to righteous Muslim men who support them, care for them and treat them as true Muslimahs. So they were able to find all the prerequisites for marriage and live within a halal union and lifestyle. The one question that they won't have to face on the Day of Judgment is why they married a non-Muslim.
What is your excuse exactly then? You don't have to share it with us. Just ponder on it for that aforementioned day.
Dear Sister,
Just want to say 3 important things, which may help you to come out of your problem Insha Allah.
1. As a Muslim, one should have utmost love Allah than anything else. You can sincerely ask that guy to convert to Islam (in real way, not just for your love). If he accepts and your parents accepts, marry him and be happy.
2. If Allah does not wish that way, then do not worry. Trust in Allah, Allah will give you a better spouse than him. In this Age, it may feel illogical to you, but trust me, arranged marriages are no way inferior to love marriages. Just Trust Allah , he will give you good spouse.
3. Please never do the mistake of marrying a Non Muslim in any case. I am not saying this cause as a religion fanatic, such marriages often lead to bitter ends and above all it will be the cause for Wrath of Allah.
4. And regarding your case of that guy demanding for funeral rights of his parents, you can teach him what Islam and truth Is. Islam is not just a religion, its a truth for mankind since the beginning. If you are not able to do it, approach a knowledgeable person, and you both learn What Islam is in proper way, and after that also he is not willing to convert or not interested, please leave him. As a youngster I feel how tough it is, but trust me, Sacrifice of any wordly things for sake of Allah is the highest virtue of any believer and No doubt Allah will reward you with a peaceful life here and eternal victory in here after.
Hope this helps.
sorry sister you are compleltly wrong you go on wrong way you slected the way which destrye your life your future your hereafter your faith your clean deen your honest childeren in future your soul your nice and clean and net body whath Allah,prophet,islam,deen.faith and your parents want do it will be benefit for you and for that guy too if inreality that guy love you so say to him between you and me there is one big and large bridge that is religion tell him if you want to spend your life with me please intere to islam honestly but please my sister dont make sad your parents accept their speeches
salamvalakum sister
sister as u say u love allah(swt) then its frist u r duty to obey the message of the creator allah clearly states in the holy quran that dont marry a non belivers its for both muslim men and women sister allah say in the quran a beliving men (muslim) is more superior to a non muslim even if that non muslim is a handsome guy even if he is rich even if he cares u but still in the sight of allah the non muslims r the looser bcoz the biggest sin what they do is the do idel worship for which allah will never forgive and if u got married to this guy what about u r childer forget about children u r going aganist the allah and his messanger(pbuh) sister when u get married u should know that the person to whom i m marrying he shoulkd also enter jaanha no muslim men will think that his wife should go to hell(jahanum) its called as better half sister love is general feeling but its not allowed in islam that is the reson allah say in quran that a muslim women shoulkd not have friendship with non muslim and vise versa and u say that if u r pearents pressure u to get marry to another guy u say that u will not marry again u r going aganist the teachings of our beloved profet muhammad(pbuh) and u still says that u love profet muhammad(pbuh) sister it is like a muslim for name sake the best thing i can say u is that forget that guy if u want to enter jaanha if u dont want that it is upto u sister bcoz allah say it the holy quran i e "I WILL NOT CHANGE THE PEOPLE UNTIL THEY CHANGE THEMSELVES" its sad to hear that our muslim sister is in love with non muslim which haraam i pray for u sister may allah give u hiddya
Hi I am riaz. I am also from kerala. you mentioned that you are in love with a hindu guy and would want to marry him. I would advise you against that. see interfaith marriages are not what are shown in movies where everything seems simple and happy. I myself was in love with a hindu girl in college and wanted to marry her. But later I had a chat with my cousin who helped me in finding the right path. He told me it was always better to choose a husband from your own communtiy. In kerala your culture is totally attached to your religion. Your food, practices, weddings, lifestyle are all according to your religion and it varies from people to people. When you are in college and at age 21 you are mostly spending time with your bf chatting with him, cracking jokes etc etc. life is not about this. when you get married you will be sharing a home with him and there the conflict of your religion and his will begin.from food to lifestyle to your views to fasting during ramzan etc there will be conflicts. you might compromise for a while but later as you grow older and cross the age of 30 etc you will start realising that you are making too many compromises. If you have children you will feel that he is not imbibing your culture and values. at that point of time you will feel that you shouldn’t have married outside your community but it will be too late.you will not be able to change the mistake and will live your remaining life critizing this decision. If you and ur husband both become atheists even in that case I don’t think it will help you.Your child will most probably be devoid of good values.you wont be able to propogate good values cos u will always the guilt of pushing ur religion on ur child.Moreover in kerala and in evy govt form ur religion is important. ur son will be in a real dilemma. Inter faith marriages are best avoided. I am sure you will find a suitable groom from the muslim community in kerala. There re all kinds of guys within muslims- modern, stylish, secular, orthodox. I am sure you will find some1 sharing your ideals. After listening to the points above from my cousin i decided to give up on ma relationship with my hindu bf. It was difficult initially but i kept myself busy or a month. After that i had overcome her. and then I moved on. after an year my parents brought many proposals to me. I chatted with them and found a female whose ideas and outlook to life was similar to mine. tofay I am a happy father of two young boys. I don’t regret beaking the relation with the hindu girl. It was in the best interests of both of us and both of us are happy. Sometimes for both to be happy you need some sad break ups. You may not be able to realise this know but I promise you, you will be thanking me for this 10 years down the line. When you marry within a community you jut need to match ur ideals and out look with the guy. but when you marry outside you have to match ur ideals and then make compromises at evry stage of life.Imagine you are fasting and he is not. there will be no big iftars, you will find urself lonely and you wont like it. You’ll be thinking why am I still alone even after marriage??
As for either of you converting its not good idea. your childhhod years are the ones where your ideals and habits are shaped, Its difficult to change them once you grow up. So even if either of you converts you will still be having ideals from ur past religion and you won’t feel comfortable performing the religious rites of your new religion. You’ll feel like you are having multiple personalities like having two lives.
So fathima think about this properly and I’m sure you will realise to go ahead with this relationship is not right. Give your parents a chance they have brought you up for these many years so they know you well and want to see you happy so trust them. I’m sure they won’t disappoint you.
there will be many hate mongers who will tell you about how bad Islam is etc.Dont listen to them.there are rotten apples in every religion.
Dear Brothers and Sisters,
It was great to see everybody's point of view and understanding of ISLAM. To your point miss muslim sister. I am a muslim by birth and a true believer. Now lot of my muslim friends call me a NON BELIEVER, reason I got married to a Hindu gurl (and we are living our religions) . Here is what is required:
To get married as per Hindu rituals, you've got to have a Hindu name and to get married to a muslim you've got to have a muslim name with islam acceptance. So did we accepted respective religions and got married..
Now here is what I realized, both religions preech you the same..AS per HINDUS there is on parmeshwar and AS PER MUSLIMS its one ALLAH. We believe in Mohd (SWH) they worship idols. I am not a professor but a man with lot of common sense... HERE both have similiar rituals, the difference is in names.
If we as MUSLIMS believe that HINDUISM IS SIN, then who is responsible to ask the ignorant people to accept ISLAM? I guess muslims, and ALLAH would expect each muslim to do this as a duty. If we are not doing that, WE are the ONES who should go to HELL and not HINDUS.
Most important fact is we blessings of non muslims to run our campigns, why are we not asking every non mustlim to ACCEPT ISLAM. Sitting somewhere and stating ISLAM doesnt permit this is like doing NON JUSTISE TO YOU DEAR SISTER
Allah gives love to us which is equivalent to 70 mothers. There are several lakhs of Paigambars came,and we hardly knew names of handfull of them.. YOu never know RAM, KRISHNA could be one of them...
So my advice to you is believe in your love, go ahead and get married.. All you need to do is, Dont get confused and decide what you WANT. IF you really love him, go ahead, your parents may disown you for temporary period but everything will be alrite in short span of time.
My believe is humanity and Love is far more superior than religion. Religion teaches us how to live life..We are nobody to judge.. I truly believe that you can not do anything without Allah's will... so if you are fallen in love its him who is choosing this man for you...
I have been happily married for last 8 yrs now...
Umar,
You have spoken alot of garbage here. You harp on about being Muslim and believing in Allah, yet you are openly disobeying His Laws, boasting about it and encouraging others to do the same. Ram, Krishna etc may have been Prophets - I agree. But there is no proof of this and it certainly does not make Hindus people of the Book.
Furthermore, you said: 'We believe in Mohd (SWH) they worship idols', as though you are making a comparison. There is no comparison. We do not worship Muhammed(sws) and we do not believe in Idols either - so what is your point? It does not make sense.
You maybe happy, but you are deluding only yourself, as what is stated in the Quran is as it is:
“And do not marry Al-Mushrikaat (idolatresses) till they believe (worship Allaah Alone). And indeed a slave woman who believes is better than a (free) Mushrikah (idolatress), even though she pleases you.” [al-Baqarah 2:221]
***NB: A mushrikah is an idol-worshipping woman who worships stones, whether from among the Arabs or others. So a hindu who worships idols is a Mushrikah.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
SisterZ,
I agree i am openly disobeying laws of Quran... Remember every creaor is Gods creation... Simply disrepecting other religion and calling them disbelievers in not fair...
YOu are missing important point.. There are lot of non muslims on the earth, if we say they are non believers, then whose duty is it to convert them into believers?
I deny to obey any religion that sepeates human beings from loving each other.... I might be harsh here but I truly believe that humanity is greater than religion...
Lot of times we tend to go by book let's also define a scietific methods for justifying our points.. If you were to eat HALAL meat there are proven reasons. Everything defined in book has scietific reason, so why should this be a complete NO?
I am not denying with what you are saying above, if we restrict/limit ourselves just with that I think we are commiting a MAJOR SIN and not the non muslims...
Once should accept ISLAM by will not by FORCE, your abouve statement makes it forceful.... BTW as per the Interfaith religion research one either accept ISLAM or Have ISLAMIC name that is all required.
Here is a flaw calling yourself a muslim just with the name, is as good as being non muslim... So dear sisters and brothers, let's look at it with a more granular lense and think about it one more time..
What are we trying to achieve? Just getting bunch muslims who have no idea about ISLAM or do we want people who really beleive in ISLAM... I guess all of us agree the later should be true.
My intention is not to hurt feelings but to help you realize what we are calling it a SIN or unacceptable movement has already become a trend now and I beleive ALL of us need to change our thinking on this topic.
Today you might not agree but tomorrow there will be a entire new law set up in this regards and I am confident about it... Religion should facilitate things and show us how to respect interfaiths and how to behave with them rather forcing them to change..
YOu may see me as a rebelian here but I am happy to be called one as NONE of us have any right to insult other religions/beliefs. I dont think any one of us have eitehr knowledge or understanding to judge these....
Umar,
Which religion are you referring to? Because the Islam that I know and understand does not teach me not to love non-Muslims. Rather it teaches me to love and respect everyone and at the same time to love for them what I love for myself, it also teaches me to invite others to the straight way, the way that Allah taught us through the Quran and Sunnah. You call yourself a believer, but yet you reject the Quran. This means you are not a believer.
I do not disrespect other religions at all. I understand that other religions may have come from the true source but that they have been distorted along the way. I have many good non Muslim friends - I tell them about Islam all the time and I have hope that many will accept it one day insha'Allah. If they don't, they will still be my friends. But I will not change my ways or beliefs in order to integrate with them (insha'Allah) as you have done.
You said: 'What are we trying to achieve? Just getting bunch muslims who have no idea about ISLAM or do we want people who really beleive in ISLAM..'
Well exactly - but what is your defintion of Islam? You seem to be rather confused at the moment.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
sallam
its the persons own responsibility of save there own soul! Its not the muslims job to go and convert everyone and if we cant well go to hell. Each soul will be judged independantly and fairly!
Only God knows if Ram or krishna were paighambars however it is true that people corrut and change things and they were turned into deities for hindus. you cannot deny this fact!
even hinduism says respect and take care of your parents so why are you telling this girl to leave hers and not respect hers?
your saying your happily married for 8 years, however what is 8 years compaired to an eternity buring in the hellfire. chasing material things are not why were on this earth! we Should worship God not love!
Allah hafiz
So funny you are debating on relagion specially Islam? 8years happily married? Well 8 years is nothing, Allah is being pity on you still giving you chance to make tawba. How long you will live? 5?10?15?2 ok let's say 30 years then? After you die you won't end your life after that ever ever and so sad will be in hellfire (well if you believe that after death you will not die you will spend for ever) There are some stuffs which we cannot change it by our words,
Also,Hindu wedding is not a valid marriage in Islamic laws. A union of a man and a woman without a valid Nikaah is considered adultery punishable by death. In short, for a Hindu, conversion to Islam before Nikaah is must. Otherwise it is not valid in allahs eyes and if it not valid in allahs eyes then no way you can scape from the torture of hellfire.
The Hindu spouse in relationship with a Muslim will learn some of these expectations just before the wedding and most after the marriage(it will happen if not today but soon) After years of being in a romantic relationship, reluctantly accepting the religious conversion may be the only way of averting a marital breakup.
If a proud Hindu wishes to avoid the religious conversion, choosing not to have the Islamic Nikaah is the only option. However, issues will come up while raising children in two faiths. It is easy for young children to get confused with conflicting messages. For example, when you take them to a Hindu or Jain temple, you ask them to believe in, respect and bow to several forms of God. But when you take them to a mosque, they hear just the opposite, exclusive, and intolerant messages. When confronted with such conflicting ideas, children may lose faith in any God or religion.
It is possible that later, you may be forbidden to practice your own Dharmic religion so that the children would not learn and follow it. Also, your Muslim spouse or his/her family may not like to be part of a Hindu religious activity while at your parent’s home. When your fantasy love period ends and it transformed into a routine married life, then these issues will become sore points in your life.
(COMMENT HAS BEEN REMOVED) - IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Who said I hate you, or am making fun of you? You are paranoid. You are quoting bollywood actors and actresses to support your argument of muslim/hindu marriages - exactly, they may be 'nice' people, but are they practicing Islam? I doubt it.
I pray Allah makes you see sense before your time is up. Aameen.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
I don't know why the mods are allowing this garbage to get published over here.Some muslim with weak faith might get influenced with his wrong and anti islamic ideas. They might not know the difference between right and wrong and can get astray.
Mods should remove all the writings which Umar posted.
P.S The so called "successful" people who Umar gave as examples probably know very little of Islam. Marriage b/w a idol worshiper and a muslim is HARAM. khalas ...period.....
I have removed it.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Lala you are right but the example he gave it's not worth it they donot know what is Islam it's just there name if they knew then they would hav not been doing acting, I donot understand this site is to help people who is trouble and understand more about our religion correctly but this " so called great knowledge men" is arguing then he should visit the sites like that not here. Last time I post one of sister problem that in here millions people so shaitan won't get chance to trap us but so sad I was WRONG! I can see it my self. Telling other to open eyes lol how funny.... Now I understand clearly that Allah has lots of patient and pity on us it's us who make rules and neglet allahs commend. He is talking about that love which dosent exaists. He lives in acting world. He talk like a movie not reality. If I was editor I would have block this post or stop this knowladgeable man to stop posting.
You wish my COMMAND.. I am making myself away from this blog post.. What i said is not a movie.. you are referring it as a movie but for me its a reality..Movies are inspired from real life stories..
Anyways SORRY JI for hurting your belief.. Idea was to quote my life and not to hurt feelings.
Takecare and have a safe life 🙂
I do not have pity for you or is making fun of you. I just do not give a damn. Your stupidity is beyond belief. You are one of those who have put their desires over their religion.
You quote people who has been successful in their marriage. You should have a good reflection over what success really is. If you want to follow these people, then may Allah, 'azza wa jal, make them your companions in the hereafter.
It is baffling how you think that the reason that Allah put you on earth is to get married.
Allah says in the Quran:
And I (Allah) created not the jinns and humans except they should worship Me (Alone). [S51 A56]
You keep talking about love etc. My question to you is how can you love a hindu girl more that your Lord?
You said that this will be a trend in the few years. Maybe. May Allah protects the true believers from this trend and may He (SWT) send his wrath upon people following this trend.
Your question is so stupid that it does not deserve an answer.
About your "loved one", Allah in His great mercy sent Muhammad(SAW) to save people from Hell fire and eases the path to Jannah. The way he(SAW) taught us to do that is by following the deen chosen by Allah, which is Islam. Anything apart from that is rejected.
If you really love your 'loved one' don't you think that you should save her from Hell? And also your children.
You have been deceived by the master deceiver, the shaitaan, who has embellish this life in your eyes. You are one of those who sold the hereafter and purchased this life. This is the most stupid deal.
Sadly now you are one of those helpers of shaitaan.
Enjoy your life, it will not last very long.
''IS CONVERSION TO ISLAM SO IMPORTANT THAT WE END UP OUR RELATIONSHIP''
Salam sister, your above question doesn't make sense.
Conversion is not a game nor part of tick the box now I can marry him.
Boyfriend/girlfriend RELATIONSHIP in Islam- is major sin- it is forbiden- it is HARAM. And Muslim girls are not allowed to marry IDOL worshippers, Sikh, Jews, Christains, Scientologists, Athiests, Buddiest, or any false religions! Muslim girls can only MARRY and make family with MUSLIM MEN, Alhamdulillah 🙂
May Allah (swt) give you guidance- aameen-
Ps. Bollywood is distruction and is also 'shining-filth' (all about premartial relationships).
Your sister, Parveen.
I will pray to Allah to open your eyes before your death comes so then attest for last you can ask for forgiveness.
So sad you don't fear Allah.
Thanks Nadia.... Pls do pray for me and for my family as well
I pray to allah to open your eyes too and look things beyond ISLAM...May allah show you the diffence between right and wrong.. If I am wrong, i equally pray him to guide me correctly. \
I am not saying I am a strong follower of ISLAM but I truly believe if you do things do it right way. I may be fulfilling my own desires.... So what, If you think fulfilling desires is HARAM then so be it.... I am happy the way I am..
I don't accept your comments on Jus conversion to ISLAM is the solution to get into Inter faith marriage.. As per statistics 20-25% of marriages that are held are between interfiath marriages. Well some say it SIN same call it anti religious.. The FACT is thats where the world is going...
I have read this and learnt this that IS DUNIYAN MAIN EK ZARA BHI NAHN HIL SAKTA ALLAH KI MARZI BINA. SO DOES INTER FAITH MARRIAGE HAS HIS AGREEMENT TO IT. ALL I CAN SAY IS PPL WHO FELL IN LOVE ARE JUST DOING WHAT THEY ARE SUPPOSE TO DO...
Anyways, choro yeh saari baatain..we both have differences in our own opions...The more i write you guys will raise your blood pressures and crib about me...Ramzaan is ahead, so wish you all Ramzaan Mubarak and have fun guys...
Mera jo hona hai wo ALLAH decide karega AAKHIRAT MAIN... You brothers and sisters have a SAFE life... The only advice is to you all EXCEPT MUSLIM SISTER is NEVER FALL IN LOVE WITH OTHER RELIGIOUS PERSONS. OR ELSE You all will end up HURTING YOURSELF THINKING B/W HALAL AND HARAM..
Yaar take life SIMPLY as it comes don't complicate it.. Have a safe life... I might not return to this subject ever coz of differences, but PPL who want to get married to interfaith, MY RECOMMEDATION THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU GO FOR IT (and take a consious decission and its not EASY to sustain the marriage, it requires lot of sacrifises) .
LOVE YOU ALL,
UMAR
sallam
brother you have no right to judge us that we dont look at things other than islam. I myself am an educated career woman and a true muslim. you speak like were all living in some village and havent seen the world or have lived in an isolated deprived enviroment.
i think you should open your mid up just ebcuase someoen is religious doesnt mean there backwards! i live alone, own my own home can choose whomeever i want to marry. But i am strong in my faith becuase i feel everyhting i have is from the grace of God.
interfaith marriage has nthign to do with God. we are granted free will, if we choose haram its our fault, its true nothing can move without Gods allowence however we are allowed free will.
i hopw your mind and heart open up to islam inshallah. ramzaan mubarak
Allah hafiz
To add to what Sr. Brokenbrain has said:
Just because no leaf moves except with Allah's WILL does NOT mean that the action has Allah's BARKAT in it....meaning that if you think you marry someone/get a particular job that you want etc and you get it, UNLESS Allah has its blessings with YOUR decision beacuse YOU take the decision for the marriage/job with your FREE WILL, it will not be successful because it did not have His blessings. He is aware of what is happening but has given you a BRAIN to differentiate wrong from right.
sallam serendipity
i totally agree you are correct!
ramzaan mubarak
Allah hafiz
Just to answer another of your misunderstanding and lack of Islamic knowledge.
I did not quite understand what you said about looking 'beyond Islam'. If by that you mean that we have blinkers on and only live in a ideal muslim world, then mate you have shown your stupidity before and that will top it. But if you mean that we should look beyond the teaching of Islam, then mate we do not want to become kafir by rejecting or adding to Allah's laws.
You talk about right and wrong. Just tell us here who defines right and wrong. You seem to be taking your definitions from Bollywood. But guess what! We do not.
We have the Word of Allah to define right and wrong for us. We do not reject or add anything in it and we are satisfied with it.
Just another respond to your stupidity,
We do not think that fulfilling desires is haraam, we only accept and follow what Allah says about that. He(SWT) says that those who follow their desires are destined to Hell, so we only believe in that.
You seem to be very stuck on statistics, majority and where the trend is going. I have news for you. Most people in this world is going to Hell. They are the vast majority, if you want to follow the majority, your choice.
I understand that you do not want to return here. The reality is very very scary.
I understand that you do not want to return to this subject. It is very hard seeing the truth.
Enjoy your easy life for a few more years.
I pray to ALLAH to walk me in the right direction (and save me from all the SIN... if am doing any) and teach you how to love people.. AAMEEN!
Just praying to Allah without conviction that you are committing sin is quite useless. He has given you ample evidences and enough brain for you to make your decision. After that ask him for forgiveness and guidance.
I pray to Allah that He, 'azza wa jal, makes me love people whom He(SWT) loves.
Yes, both brokenbrain and serendipti you guys make alot of sense..I amy have choosen my own destiny and I am happy..
After going through the blogs and posts, I realized I am just hurting your beliefs and trying to pose mine.. I apologize for doing that.. My Intention was to simply share my story with Muslim sister for her marriage.. THATS ALL! Somehow, I am taking my anger on ALL OF YOU and I SHOULDN'T DO THAT..PLS FORGIVE ME!
I am not saying what you are saying is wrong.. I guess I am the ODD ONE OUT HERE and All i meant was I am happy the way I am..
I am not disagreeing with what is allowed and not allowed in ISLAM.. Someone also said examples I quoted are not worth it... I agree but look around yourself and you will witess plenty of examples around you...because Interfaith marriages are becoming reality!
I am not a judge or a preacher.. Just a common man trying to quoting my own lifes example for somebody who is really confused and is looking for so real life examples
Forgive me and Hope to you all will pray for me 🙂
Have a safe and secure life guyzz!
Love you all
sallam brother
inshallah i will pray for you! ameen
Allah hafiz
Brother Umra,
It doesn't work like that lol say for example, tomorrow there are plenty of people around you walking naked would you follow them or going round telling people that it is okay to walk around naked coz plenty do it???- would you walk around like that? Hopefully you won't!
It is not what about majority or plenty and it is working out, it is about the law and orders sit by God to us! Let me put it this way for you: We (Muslims) believe that this life is a practicle TEST! The study text book is the Quran, the teacher Prophet Muhammad pbuh and the examiner Allah swt. if one passes this test, inshaAllah, Allah will grant them paradise, and those who fail, inshaAllah, Allah will grant them hell. There is no loopholes in this test. No one can cheat!- not even the best of Muslims!!! because Allah (swt) sees what is in our hearts and our intentions towards our heart's desires. If our intention was to please Allah (swt) alone- following His commands, then inshaAllah Allah will be pleased with us. However, if our intention was to please our desires (wordly love) then inshaAllah, we have displeased Allah (swt)..Therefore, if a muslim girl chooses to marry a hindu boy, then the Muslim girl inshaAllah have displeased Allah (swt) as she chose to follow her worldly desires instead of Allah's law and commands in the Quran. and if you want to know what happens to all non-Muslims then I suggest you read the Quran with an open unbaised heart. We get this practicle test only once and once we die there is no going back to retake this test!
May Allah (swt) gives His guidance to all mankind-aameen-
sallam
mashallah sister parveen. you gave good examples and ill be honest your naked example made me laugh. however the second paragraph was amazing. you hit the nail on the head!
Allah hafiz
ramzaan mubarak
Thanks Parveen explaining! You seem to quote exteme examples.. You seem to be knowledgeable and sensitive too...
I dont' disagree with you neither do I agree with you.. You are right, I try and fullfill my desires and I guess I am choosing this life.
If I were litrally read this thread I have two options:
- Get the girl converted to ISLAM... which is not fair to HER
- Get myself seperated and I can not do that..(this ways I guess I may end up leaving wrong impression about ISLAM)
Neither these not acceptable to me neither practicle (for my futher). Now i really know why they say ISLAM is toughest...I appriciate all you beutiful people for your efforts..
Thanks
No worries dear brother. Sometimes we have to give exterme examples so ppl starts to think the consequenses ahead.Unlike other faiths, Muslims cannot change word of God/Allah. For instances, Homosexuality practises are forbiden in Christanity yet without caring about their Gods's (Allah) Command they make changes to His word, therefore bible is a distorted book.
A week ago, I was in communication with non-Muslims ( English and Americans- some christains and some athiests) that a topic was raised by one of the respected members. The topic was ''if Alcohol never existed and magical if one finds the receipe for alcohol do you think the government would allow alcohol product in the market (make it legal)? Not even one said yes! They all said no, alcohol would be made ILLEGAL as it is greater danger to health than benefit. And subhanAllah, it is only Islam that forbids Alcohol and only now people have realised the consequences of consuming Alcohol. Simiarly, although interfaith might be the trend, eventually the consequences will be realised.
I wish you well in this life.
And if I come across as sensitive then I take it as compliment 🙂 as it merely shows that I care about my Muslim sisters. I want them to be happy and successful in this life and paradise in the Hereafter. InshaAllah, in this life you may give this Muslim girl happiness but you won't be able to give her Paradise!!! And I am concerned what is the Muslim sister going to do (Allah-forbids) with her non-Muslim husband's dead body (?) And death is way proven fact/REALITY than interfaith marriages.
Takecare and I apperciate your patience in here.
Your sister, Parveen.
mashallah sister you are very wise. Alhumdolillah it makes me want to be a better muslim inshallah.
Allah Hafiz
I am disappointed with the way the entire discussion has been conducted and moderated. Wonder, can't we just let people express their point of views, without getting personal or making sarcastic comments?
A woman has come here, seeking help. She's confused and looking for a possible solution. She has her doubts and she's only trying to understand things in a better light. In which case, all we need to do is just share our experience and our understanding on the matter without already attempting to define the rights and wrongs of it. That's for her to define and decide! She's not lived our lives, right? At the most, all we can do is guide her but certainly not compel her!
Wonder, why is Umar being attacked or been constantly asked to "fear" Allah, when he's just expressed a point of view, like all of us have! Only because, he's said something that he believes in, and is not in sync with the ideology a lot of us believe in, doesn't authorize us to reprimand him, judge him or ostracize him.
This is a forum, where we must encourage healthy debates and discussions, where we must allow voices from different walks of life to express, to let people understand, think and eventually define their own rights and wrongs. Suppressing a voice, only because it has something "different" to say emphasizes the fact that we perhaps acknowledge that it has a point that is valid and we fear, that it may influence!
I am utterly disappointed that time and again, people have used words like "Fear" ALLAH! I wonder, where's the need to "fear" ALLAH?!?!? I believe, we must follow ALLAH, out of sincere affection for him, out of our deep admiration for him, and out of our belief in his being, NOT because we "fear" the mighty ALLAH can punish us, can unleash his wrath on us, and can subject us to a dreadful fate for not following his command! That's plain selfish and stupid, to be very honest.
Let's learn to be tolerant to each other, to fellow human beings. Free will or ALLAH's will, is for the lord to judge, it is none of our business to speculate on such matters. After all, what might appear evil or wrong to you or me, might be a person's test from ALLAH! So let's leave it to the almighty to judge what's right or what's wrong and let's just stick to our beliefs with regards to our lives.
Pray ALLAH blesses us all with the wisdom to do what is right!
sallam
just as umar has the right to experess his opinion so have we. there is nothing worng with the moderation of this chat. if ou read above we have not made any comments about umars faith, or his choices, all i have done is adress the points he made.
And i believe that Umar was the on calling us narror minded and we didnt see past Islam. and as i corrected him im an educated independant girl. I have not targeted umar, i ahve never said i want anything bad for him or his family nor would i want any wrath to fall upon anyone, especially not a muslim.
tolerance works bother ways. like im tolerant towards someoen belifs i feel that this tolerance should be extended to me. i have never judged brotehr Umar and you can read that clearly i jsut adressed his point and proved them wrong, nothing wrong with healthy debate!
Allah hafiz
Is this debate a ground to prove you've an edge above others? Where's the need to declare, "I proved him wrong!"?
I am sorry to point it out to you again, but you don't really understand when I emphasize on the fact that don't define "rights" and "wrongs" for others! Only ALLAH's got the authority to judge people and define right and wrong in absolute manner! We're mere human beings, who do not know what people's life has been like!
I have used the word "disappointed" (not right or wrong!) when I talk about the way the entire discussion has unfolded and moderated! Do you understand the difference here?
With regards to Umar, I have asked why is he constantly told "FEAR" ALLAH! And I have then even explained the reason WHY we must not!
Everyone here, I believe, has a sound educational background and an independent thinking mind which has allowed us to voice our opinions. And in fact, one reason why we must show the maturity of AGREEING TO DISAGREE if there is a difference of opinion!
Like I've said earlier, those who're not living an "ideal" life you, I or many others endorse, are perhaps living a test ALLAH's designed for them! In which case, all we must do is try and help but certainly not judge or reprimand people for being part of something God's designed for them. That's entirely between God and the individual.
So let's leave things at that.
Salaams,
I would just like to remind everyone of the policies of this website that can be found here:
http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/about-us/
They are as follows:
Please Do Not:
Ridicule or mock anyone.
Encourage hatred, racism or nationalism.
Judge or condemn someone harshly. Even though they may have committed sins or made mistakes, they are human beings who are confused or in pain. They need guidance, not vitriol.
(For those non-Muslim readers) denounce the Islamic religion or Muslim beliefs. That is not helpful.
Any comments displaying the above qualities will be deleted. This is not one of those "anything goes" types of forums. (bold mine)
Please Do:
Show compassion and kindness in your answer. Be gentle.
Try to answer as a Muslim, keeping in mind the teachings of the Quran and Sunnah.
Remember that Islam is a religion of mercy and forgiveness.
I believe that if anyone was moderated, or had their comments deleted, it was in line with what has been outlined above.
In addition to that, for any Muslim to advise another Muslim against what Allah has ordained is a heavy thing. So, if other Muslims come in and try to guide that person back to the correct way, they are only doing what is admonished in hadith. There is no sin upon those who are doing such with earnest intentions, although everything should be done with the best adab.
-Amy
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
@Amy & others,
There is no sin upon those who are doing such with earnest intentions, although everything should be done with the best adab.
...And that precisely is missing!
Umar might be having his own interpretation of Islam, and his own set of values, but nowhere in this entire discussion (except the one post that has already been deleted) I have seen him ridicule someone, "LOL" at someone, make personal remark about any of us, use harsh language or tell anybody how cursed their life is! He's at least trying to maintain the decorum of the forum.
Whereas others, it seems, couldn't respond to him in the same manner or language.
Some examples,
"You have spoken alot of garbage here."
"Its not the muslims job to go and convert everyone and if we cant well go to hell."
"So funny you are debating on relagion specially Islam? 8years happily married?"
I donot understand this site is to help people who is trouble and understand more about our religion correctly but this " so called great knowledge men" is arguing then he should visit the sites like that not here. Last time I post one of sister problem that in here millions people so shaitan won't get chance to trap us but so sad I was WRONG! I can see it my self. Telling other to open eyes lol how funny....
I do not have pity for you or is making fun of you. I just do not give a damn. Your stupidity is beyond belief. You are one of those who have put their desires over their religion.
Your question is so stupid that it does not deserve an answer.
You have been deceived by the master deceiver, the shaitaan, who has embellish this life in your eyes. You are one of those who sold the hereafter and purchased this life. This is the most stupid deal.Sadly now you are one of those helpers of shaitaan. Enjoy your life, it will not last very long.
Where's the "adab" in the above comments? Even if the contributors think they're right, how exactly has this manner of conduct or tone of language helped a person come to the right path? These comments are so full of spite and in fact reek of a false sense of superiority! Do we consider ourselves so flawless that we have sort of ganged up against a single person who's saying something different from what we think?
In fact, have we really forgotten how and why each one of us reached this forum? Yes, most of us either wronged someone or were wronged by a person who called himself a "Muslim"! Don't we have "Muslim" men and women here who have engaged in worst sins? Don't we then gently console them to turn to ALLAH and give their life and themselves another chance?
...Don't you all think we could have avoided using terms like "garbage" (...came from an editor!), "LOL", "helper of Shaitan", etc?? We could HAVE put things in a way better manner.
Someone said, "your question is so stupid that it doesn't deserve an answer!" Well then what's the point of this entire discussion? Calling names, saying hurtful personal things or cursing their lives?
Also, if this is the tirade we had against a fellow Muslim then how do you expect to reach out to Non-Muslims (who regularly frequent the site) and make them see Islam from the correct light?
...I doubt, if I can see compassion in ANY of the posts above! Where's the Islam of mercy, forgiveness and compassion, we have been referring to?
sallam
Its not the muslims job to go and convert everyone and if we cant well go to hell."
this was in responce to UMAR saying
If we as MUSLIMS believe that HINDUISM IS SIN, then who is responsible to ask the ignorant people to accept ISLAM? I guess muslims, and ALLAH would expect each muslim to do this as a duty. If we are not doing that, WE are the ONES who should go to HELL and not HINDUS.
i was not personally attacking umar you should clerly read both sides of the argument.
Allah hafiz
Salaams, Tourbillon,
I am not saying that others are having the best adab by their comments, but what you might not have known is that brother Umar did make some very inflammatory statements, which have since been deleted (see Wael's post to lala from 7/16 above). It may be that some folks are reacting to what he had said previously, but I agree with you that two wrongs don't make a right. I was just saying that so that you would not be under the impression that Umar is being picked on unfairly and that he is totally innocent, having done no wrong himself.
-Amy
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Tourbillon, you are right. The tone of some of these responses was unacceptable. We will strive to moderate the forum better in the future, and to do better ourselves by expressing ourselves more calmly, Insha'Allah. Jazak Allah khayr for the reminder.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
I agree and I apologise for my tone of speech too.
I was unaware of the other responses as I was not following this thread.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
TourbillionBrother,
I appreciate your accumulated observation but not some of your justification.
I have not misused the internet term 'lol'. Please re-read my post as my reasonings to br. Umar was in publically kind manner, to which br. Umar himself did not object nor I belittled his or anyone's faith.
-----
Br. Umar,
I would like to apologise (pls forgive me) for any of my wrong doings towards you.
-----
Despite my good intention, may Allah (swt) forgive all my unjust dealings (bad actions) towards His mankind-aameen-
Hey mate Tourbillion,
I do not understand where you are coming from. You are saying that he can his own interpretation and be allowed to freely spread it polluting the air around.
This guy rejects is basic teaching of Islam and takes for models bollywood actors, and his telling us that muslim and hindus marriage is a trend and we have to live with it.
YOU WANT US TO SIT HERE AND ACCEPT IT.
I really do not care if he thinks that for himself but the moment he is spreading this around it becomes my concern.
He is attacking the religion of Islam and you seem not to realize that.
His comments should have been removed by moderators as they are poison to this ummah.
This guy let his children follow the hindu religion and if you do not know, in hinduism idols are worship. This leads someone out of Islam. You tell us to smile at him and be courteous to him. Get real man!
One last thing, you seem to have fail to grasp that he was not asking for advices. HE WAS GIVING ADVICES.
Brother Tourbillion,
Thank you wasn't noticing that some of my words were not acceptable. I truly apology fir my bad behavior towards brother umar, I made a mistake!
May Allah forgive us.
@Wael, Sister Z & Nadia,
I sincerely thank you. Glad you could understand what I meant and what I am striving for. Hope ALLAH helps us all do the right thing and in the right manner.
@broken brain,
I have already elaborated a lot on the "conduct of manner" and "tone of language" in which one expresses something and how the lack of it here has not helped anybody. You can read and check what you have quoted for me and you will know what I am talking about.
Rest is for you to decide, I am not here to influence anybody.
@Parveen,
I had a purpose when I didn't list names against the quoted comments. My intention was to not embarass anyone on the forum. But I am glad, that almost everyone (since Umar's contribution to the thread) has taken my post personally and responded to it! I think, somewhere each of us feel we have contributed to the mess.
You talked about "LOL", please read the comments I have quoted, to understand in which context I have found "LOL" offensive. Perhaps, might help you notice, I haven't quoted a single line from your comments!
On my jusitifications, like I have already said earlier, WE CAN ALWAYS AGREE TO DISAGREE!
@Yoda,
Are you telling me, that the UMMAH's faith or belief in ISLAM or ALLAH is so weak, that just about a single person can breeze in, influence and affect its core beliefs?
Umar has his own, I repeat, "interpretation" of islam and above all his own set of values, but I have not seen him "ATTACK" any individual or the religion. He's in fact insisted and prayed that ALLAH must correct him, if he's wrong. He's not a man with a rigid stance, he's a man who's willing to reason and willing to be corrected. A sign, he's a MUSLIM!
You said, how do you expect us to sit and accept what Umar's talking about, to which my reply is but you have not and you don't have to! But at the same time, my question to you is how has your tirade against Umar helped him or his children come closer to the ummah? In fact, we were so spiteful towards him that he chose to leave this entirely. How has your "effort" contributed to the UMMAH?
You've referred to Shaitan time and again, but now tell me who's pushed a follower further away?
Please understand there's a huge difference between PROPOGATING a belief and "DEFENDING" a belief. Is your ISLAM so weak that you think you need to pull down individuals to defend or protect it?
Why did you assume, I thought Umar was asking for advices? He had never in the first place! He had expressed a POV like all of us do on this forum. Not his problem, if a lot of us chose to invest our time and "knowledge" in pulling him down!
Also, have you read the entire thread, if not then please go through it. You will realise, that besides Umar, there have been others too who have expressed opinions similar to that of Umar's. Even then there were people who objected to it, but in a manner which was not offensive. People discussed things but constructively, something a responsible Muslim would do towards the UMMAH, rIght?!?!
Finally, again, why have you chosen to ignore Islam is also a religion of mercy, forgiveness and compassion?
I think you if you followed the post since the beginning you would have been better apt to judge if this guy was attacking individuals or Islam.
Some of his post have been deleted.
I think sister brokenbrain pointed out to you what he said when he called us narrow minded and have pity on us and that we should look beyond Islam.
For you it is okay that anyone has his or her own interpretation of Islam and he should be able to propagate it to the world. I am not sure how you can justify that.
About his writing that he has asked Allah for forgiveness(which seem to have had an immense effect on you), just read what he wrote. He said that if I am wrong may Allah guide me but he keeps insisting that he is not wrong. Just as Salman Rushdie says. A sign that he is still a muslim.
Well nobody said that he is a kafir. What I said was that he was helping spreading false belief that is not from the teaching of Islam. These interpretation as you like to call it, is from the shaitan.
Well you said that you did not assume that he was asking for advices. Then why do you want us to help him? He did not ask for help, he was giving help!
When he was told above that this is not allowed he started the sarcasm (the post that was deleted).
Just tell me if this girl that post the question was your sister and umar was the one advising her that it is okay to marry hindu, how would you react?
@Yoda,
Am I using a language that is too complex or not comprehensible? If I am, then please tell me. English is not my first language.
I have noticed you have skipped answering few very basic questions I asked you to help me understand your angst or rather "tirade" (the word I have used in previous post) against a particular person in question BUT I'll try and address your points singularly, to clear a confusion if there's any!
I think you if you followed the post since the beginning you would have been better apt to judge if this guy was attacking individuals or Islam.
Some of his post have been deleted.
I think sister brokenbrain pointed out to you what he said when he called us narrow minded and have pity on us and that we should look beyond Islam.
I have seen only one comment which has been deleted by the editors (which was after 3 - 4 comments that were addressed to Umar, that also had personal remarks and other unacceptable things!) I repeat, Umar has his OWN SET OF VALUES (Like many other NON MUSLIMS who visit this site) and hence offers a different perspective but what we need to notice is he's not disrespecting Islam the way some of us have callously talked about others religions.
Also, he's used the word narrow minded, he's not called your beliefs or views "Garbage" or "Stupidity"! His language and his conduct is modest, whereas like I have said earlier, a lot of us have gloated in a false sense of superiority!
For you it is okay that anyone has his or her own interpretation of Islam and he should be able to propagate it to the world. I am not sure how you can justify that.
About his writing that he has asked Allah for forgiveness(which seem to have had an immense effect on you), just read what he wrote. He said that if I am wrong may Allah guide me but he keeps insisting that he is not wrong. Just as Salman Rushdie says. A sign that he is still a muslim.
Well nobody said that he is a kafir. What I said was that he was helping spreading false belief that is not from the teaching of Islam. These interpretation as you like to call it, is from the shaitan.
Yes, Umar's willingness to be corrected by ALLAH definitely has touched me! Umar (or just about any individual) is absolutely correct in saying "IF I AM WRONG MAY ALLAH GUIDE ME!"
Now tell me one thing Yoda, who's a better judge (of right or wrong, of true or false, of just about anything), YOU, I, Umar or ALLAH? Tell me, who's got the final authority to reprimand a man for his "wrongdoing", you, I, Umar or ALLAH?
You, I or any individual on this forum has no authority to get rude to people, make mean offensive personal remarks, reprimand and ostracize them for something that is entirely between them and ALLAH.
Well you said that you did not assume that he was asking for advices. Then why do you want us to help him? He did not ask for help, he was giving help!
When he was told above that this is not allowed he started the sarcasm (the post that was deleted).
So what exactly are you bothered about? Are you upset that Umar "adviced" like all of us do, in your words, he was trying to give help, that he was doing something which is the very purpose of this forum?
If you do not wish to, I can not ask you to help anybody. But I certainly have a conscience that pinches me when I see a person who's not willing to help or guide, abuse someone or attack someone, only because he thinks he's evil or wrong!
In fact, let me tell you a lot of Non-Muslims also contribute to this forum, their advices are based on their beliefs and values, sometimes not in sync with Islam. So what are we supposed to do then, shall we abuse them and chase them out of the forum OR gently let them know this is what Islam has to say on this and help them understand Islam better?
Also, I never assumed anything. It was your assumption "One last thing, you seem to have fail to grasp that he was not asking for advices. HE WAS GIVING ADVICES."
Just tell me if this girl that post the question was your sister and umar was the one advising her that it is okay to marry hindu, how would you react?
My stand would be the same, as it is now! I can do everything to the best of my abilities to convince my sister or just about any individual to understand what ALLAH expects out of us, but I can not scream, abuse and call names to a person, to make them do something I believe is RIGHT.
I have emphasized time and again, don't define rights and wrongs for others. Something that appears "wrong" or "evil" to our naked eye or mind, can be ALLAH's test for that human being. Something that is entirely between that individual and ALLAH.
Finally yoda, if you still have questions or doubts about what I am striving for, then please go through my posts all over again. I have already made myself very clear. In fact, I have been repeating myself in my explanations to you, which is not helping the thread anymore. Something which I think is not fair to this particular thread.
I'll conclude this here!
If you are implying that I skipped your questions on why pick on umar, I only answered him as he was the one being sarcastic and he was still commenting. If the posters before him was sarcastic and still commenting I would have answered them as well.
Regarding the barrier, it is not a language issue believe me(si tu veux, on peut parlez en francais). It is an issue with your understanding.
Again when did I judge him? I only pointed out to you that saying something that you believe is incorrect is pure hypocrisy.
You seem to adhere more to the purpose and rule of this forum rather than the teaching of Islam. In Islam if someone is propagating false islamic teachings then he should be stopped.
I thanks the moderator who removed the advice that he gave to this sister. That is following the teaching of Islam.
I have emphasized time and again, don't define rights and wrongs for others. Something that appears "wrong" or "evil" to our naked eye or mind, can be ALLAH's test for that human being. Something that is entirely between that individual and ALLAH.
I thought for muslims right and wrong was already defined by the Quran, who has a name called Al Furqan.
Sorry to read that your definition of responsibility only stops at convincing.
Yes, You have skipped answering my questions addressed to you in my first reply to you! Have you or your manner convinced anybody? No! You have instead chased people out! If that's your way of Islam, so be it, but you cannot deter me from doing my bit!
You say, you didn't judge Umar. Then who called him "Stupid", who referred to him as "a helper of Shaitan"?
And who allows you to decide where a person must stop responding to the posts on this forum? No one's done that to you!
Why do you think it's you who's the sole authority to evaluate people's ability and understanding, their lives and their belief in God?!?!
Talk about my responsibility, my responsibility reflects in my conduct and in my life! I don't curse people, their lives, I instead introspect first and get myself right before telling others to act right!
Your Islam might be all about "not marrying a hindu", My islam is all about Mercy, forgiveness and compassion!
Yes, You have skipped answering my questions addressed to you in my first reply to you!
Have you or your manner convinced anybody? No! You have instead chased people out! If that's your way of Islam, so be it, but you cannot deter me from doing my bit!
I did not try to convince umar. I wanted him to keep his polluted ideas about Islam to himself. So I guess it succeeded, until you came in and try to justify that it is okay to propagate personal interpretation of Islam based on desires.
(Only because you kept referring to Shaitan)
Should I now interpret Umar's leaving as Shaitan succeeding in making a fellow Muslim leave with bitterness for another Muslim? Or Shaitan succeeding in making two Muslim brothers fight amongst each other instead of sorting out their differences with wisdom, grace and compassion?
You interpret however you like mate. You seem to be an apologist for those who use desire based interpretation.
I did not fight with him. He was giving polluted desire based personal interpretation of islam to this sister asking for ISLAMIC guidance and he should have been stopped. That's what happened.
If that was my crime, I can live with that.
Apologist! And then you say, you don't judge people!
Never mind. Our posts are all over the thread for everyone to read and comprehend.
Good, our argument will at least help people think, understand and decide.
I am back!
Somehow, my email id was blocked, I posted number of replies since yday till today.. but none got relected here
@Yoda, Pls dont mind I didnt left the blog coz I want to prove myself right or yourself wrong.. It is simple becuase this argument has no end! Hence I agreed to disagree and planned to get a new site created for interfaith marriages where in my intention is to show people religions way and human way and let them decide whatever suits them. I myself have gone through lot of research and discussions with many knowledgeable people. You are not the only one how criticized me there are plenty. BTW for the first somebody supported me may be not mybelifs but respect my thoughts was tourbillon.
Don't Jump on to conclusions dude.. my reason of not posting was my ID getting disabled and not anything else... Relax and think, what I said is practicle and what you are saying is theory. Battle between this two is never ending.
To all dont be appologisitc! I have no bitterness foranybody....
Isn't it high time that the moderators close this toxic post? In addition to fighting, it shows us as utter uncouth people if someone should stumble upon it on a web search.
Everyone here needs to grow up! I wonder what everyone here would do if they were face to face....claw at each other?
It may indeed be time to close the post. I will do so, Insha'Allah.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor