Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Muslim mother having intercourse before marriage

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salaam...
I am a young muslim and by far not the best I could be! I was born out of wedlock... My mother converted into Islam when she fell pregnant with me(I've been told). My mother and father split up when I was only young and my mum has been single ever since. There is one aspect of islam that I feel strongly about- Sex before marriage, not only because of my own past experiances of being called a 'haraam child' but more importantly because sex before marrige is STRICTLY HARAM.

Over the past few months I have found certain things that indicate that my mother has been having intercourse with another man/other men. I am absloutly DISGUSTED by my mum's behaviour mainly because it is haram- she has proved that she has no self respect for her self. More to the point- I do not know what to do about this situation... What is her potential punishment? And please explain to me how serious this is etc.
Thankyou.


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3 Responses »

  1. Salam,
    Let me put it straight...
    You are not supposed to judge her.. matter of fact no one on this earth can judge her.. Allah says in Qur'an that "He is the Best Judge and He Knows best". So stop worrying about it, this is because we/you do not know the mental or other problems which your mom might be facing.. and Allah says there is forgiveness if you are forced into something without your own will...
    and as she is your mom, she is to be respected and let Allah be her wali(Guardian), so the best thing is to stop worrying and start focusing on the qualities and sacrifices she made to rear you.. and thank her and Allah for the same.. who knows she may change in the future.. you never know..
    do think about it..

    Islam gives you the freedom to act, however, it also reminds you that only YOU are accountable for your actions and you shall be held accountable Before Him.

    I'm happy that you do not take the burden of your mom's wrong doing as your own.. remember- your account/book of deeds in front of Lord is different and you won't be held accountable for what she has done.. Love her for Allah sakes.. when you make it personal it *hurts* when she does something worng

    For more info and guidance Start reading Qur'an Yourself. I recommend King Fahad's Qur'an or Abu-ala-Maududi's. The English version.

    Allah Knows Best.

  2. Well whatever she is she is still your mom
    And a mother has the highest position in islam bcoz she is the one which bear pain for 9 months to bring u in this world That cannot be repaid

    " a person said to our prophet " o prophet as my mother cannot walk I took her to haj on my back . Have I repaid to all the pain my mother took while given me birth

    Prophet replied , u haven't repaid even a pinch of what the pain your mother took while giving birth to u "

  3. It's not an easy situation to be in... immediatley when we
    We think of a mother such lovely honourable words come to mind
    I.e.. comfort zone..'positive role model, respect &
    High status & all the good words. now to discover that your mum has another side to her ( which is a forbidden act) is not surprisingly going to make you think good of your mum.. so my dear my advice to you is Accept that your mother is a human to & that she too can make mistakes .. & keep a balanced attitude .. Leave it to Allah (swa) & inshallah continue giving your mum respect inshallah you will be rewarded... Remember your assumptions could also be wrong so please relax.

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