Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My friend fornicated – confused what to do?

Two Muslim girls.

My friend has strayed from the straight path...

Assalamualykum,

A day or two ago, my best friend confessed to me that she had fornicated. She said she felt disgusted by it but not enough to feel any guilt.

I was very shocked by what she told me. I didn't know how to react and judged her. I almost forced her to tell a scholar but realized that that was the wrong way to go about things. Then I tried to make her realize but I don't think I can create guilt in her. That is upto her to feel. As yet, I've decided not to talk to her about it.

But the thing is, now I think differently of her. I love her and care very much about her because she's like a sister to me. But with her committing sins, I am confused as to what to do. I want to continue being friends with her but sometimes, I just feel repelled by her. I don't think cutting her off would be the right thing to do because it's useless.

I am extremely very confused. Help me and tell me what is it that I should do?

raspberries


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6 Responses »

  1. I dont know what is sins and what is not...but
    .Its just ur mind set....becoz...u may dont have many friends..and guidense..ur feeling lonely from inside first make urself free...and lets not to think that ur alone.... just relax and.....keep her a side....and first think abt urself....what u want who ur in actual....dont get confused.....

  2. Salam sister, you have sinned too haven't u? U just sinned differntly. Allah forgives all sins, instead of leaving her ask Allah to help her and forgive her.

  3. salam.Sister nobody is perfect in this world except muhammad S.A.W. The best thing she needs a friend to be with to talk with and express her feelings .We all need somebody.Other then that its not your business to tell others or make her feel shes gonna burn in hell? So giver her good advice and seek forgiveness because Allah is the best of judges. Sister having sex with a person is bad.But looking has levels or degrees of taqwa. For eg. you accidently saw a naked person and then you looked the other way and asked for forgiveness .On the other hand you watch a movie with alot of kissing and hugging dressing with tight clothing.The reality is this person doesnt know it but he is sinning heavily.So point is leave this and move on and dont let the devil destroy your relationship because oneday you will be tested. And thats a fact.

  4. Assalamualaikum Sister,

    I agree with some of the other comments. First of all, all of us sin and to what degree is that sin? Truly depends on the magnitude of the sin itself. Nonetheless, pray for your friend. Guide her, and bring her back to the straight path. Perhaps go to lectures together. I had a friend who did the same thing in high school. I held her tight and said, Allah is ever forgiving. She was more in shock than anything else and she was surprised that she did such a horrible act. You must not leave her side. Some of us are weak while others are very strong, Mashallah.

    To be honest, she should have never disclosed her sin to you. It is like she has a witness to her sin on the day of judgement. Allah knows best. Educate her and tell her to keep her sins concealed. Tell her to pray and even if she does not feel guilt right now, she may feel it down the road. Shaitaan works his magic (may Allah's curse be upon him) and he makes us believe that everything is fine until we reach rock bottom.

    If you did something wrong, would you want Allah to disown you? You mentioned that you love your friend like a sister, right? So, continue doing so and strengthen your relationship with her. Inshallah.

    May Allah forgive all of us and guide us to be righteous people. Ameen ya raab.

    W'salaam,

    Sister-in-a-hood

  5. I agree with above but dont judge her she made mistakes. Let her learn from her own mistakes she probably does feel guilty maybe doesnt want to show. Tell her to conceal her sins and never disclose thats no ones business except between her and Allah. Everyone is different and cope with things differently. Be a good muslim towards her maybe she will come round and change her ways. It takes time and is the healer process.

  6. OP: my best friend confessed to me that she had fornicated. She said she felt disgusted by it but not enough to feel any guilt.....I was very shocked by what she told me. I didn't know how to react and judge her. I almost forced her to tell a scholar but realized that that was the wrong way to go about things. ......But the thing is, now I think differently of her. I love her and care very much about her because she's like a sister to me.

    If you truly feel she is like your sister, then treat her like as if your sister committed a sin and ........... What scholar you wanted her to talk too?

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