Should I convert to Islam?
Hi,
My boyfriend and myself have been in a three year relationship and have been through hell from both of our parents. Well, I am a Catholic girl and have been all my life and my boyfriend is Muslim.
We fight over silly things but always seem to work through everything because we truly do care and love one another.
I have been thinking about converting to Islam because one reason my boyfriend asked me to and I have looked into it but I don't want to do it for the wrong reasons. I want to believe in it 100% before I do but I also want to know my boyfriend well still love me for who I am.
I am not sure what to do and I need advice. I don't have any other Muslim friends and would like some help please. It's really stressing me out and I think harming my relationship because I am not sure what to do but I know I can't live without him in my life.
Thanks,
Lis.
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Assalaam Walekum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu sister LIs,
As for a plant to grow out of earth a seed is required, a reason is required for a person to think about Islam.In your case that seed/reason is your love.
Now if you accept Islam, it would be similar to germination process of a seed. When a person says Shahada with his tougue and heart ,he/she becomes as innocent as a new born baby infront of Allah The Almighty. When I say Allah The Almighty it refers to the same one God as referred in Bible.To put it in our day to day prospective, your acceptance of Islam would be like similar to updating the antivirus definitions in your computer.Well as you must be aware, updating an antivirus does not affect Operating system of the computer.But rather it helps in recognizing only the malicious programs running on your computer.The malicious programs which till before updating, were considered harmless, are now harmful after updating,Which if not taken care would bring down the whole operating system.
Similarly , your mind ,soul,and heart as a whole is an Operating system.Your present religion is an old version of antiivirus.While Islam is just the new updated antivirus which recognises some things in our life ,these includes beliefs about three god, eating habits,interaction between opposite sex,human willed modification in Bible etc. as malicious programs which can affect our operating system's performance.
So as far as your acceptance of Islam is considered , it is not only matter of you and your boyfriend, in later part of your life that will include any offsprings from you two and their beliefs.Here on this site itself you will get to know many people whose parents accepted Islam and their kids are well raised by guidance of Allah The Almighty.
This goes as far as Islam and Christianity through my understanding.
Now coming to you my sister, your life how it would be affected if you accept Islam? There is nothing called pre- marital relationship (dating) in Islam.All has to go in such a way that it remains in heart, As Allah says in Quran, I KNOW HOW YOUR HEART LONGS FOR LOVED ONES, ABOUT WHOM AND WHEN YOU THINK. Also he guides further by saying: THERE IS NO HARM IN ASKING FOR A WOMAN'S HAND INDIRECTLY, also He warns: BUT DO NOT UTTER ANY COMMITMENTS ON YOUR OWN BEFORE THE MARRIAGE, LET DESTINY'S TIME COME WHEN THE WRITTEN THING WOULD OCCUR.
See my sister our creator is aware of what we feel for the person we love and he guides us to right path in that also.Thats the word of our Lord The All Knowing and The most Considerate.
Secondly, hostility towards you from the people around you so that you return back.This is there with everyone.As Allah Says in Quran : THE METTLE OF YOUR FAITH WILL BE TESTED BY ME, AS WERE THOSE TESTED BEFORE YOU SO THAT I COME TO KNOW WHO IS PATIENT AND WHO IS A WARRIOR AMONGS YOU.But if you read Quran you will realise that this does not end here, there are verses in which HE the Exalted is He, also mentions about the pain a believer has to go during these tests and He Himself Comforts by saying: WHAT, WOULDNT I KNOW HOW IT FEELS LIKE , THE ONE WHO CREATED YOU.
Sister all I know is that if the whole world turns against me, and my loving ones stop loving me anymore and act rudely, even then HE The most Loving would continue to love me as I am and for what I am if I believe in HIM.Not only that He Says: My good tidings in this world are for all, for those who believe in me and for those who do not believe in me and there is no differentiation.
Your case reminds me the amazing lifetime of Wife of Prophet Yusuf Alaihi Salaam,Zulekha.She was in love with Him, but when she realised that If The Almighty can turn Her back to her youth through prayer's of His Prophet it is much better to seek love of Almighty than love of Prophet Yusuf Alaihi Salaam.And that she realised after longing for Yusuf Alaihi Salaam for her whole life.And finally it happens, it was Yusuf Alaihi Salaam who started pursuing her for marriage.Thats the way things work in this world as pointed out by my teacher, Allah says to lower world: be with the one who does things for me and be away from the one who does things for you.
May Allah The All forgiving have mercy upon you and us, and guide us all.
Allah Hafiz wa Nasir.
Salam, Br. Mohd Ali
Can you please share the story of Hazrat Yusuf and Zulekha - I was unaware that they got married, other than what the story in the Quran is. I am really curious to know what happened!
Or if any other reader here knows, please post as a response.
Thanks
Also, can you share the reference in the Quran where your quoted from it:" As Allah says in Quran, I KNOW HOW YOUR HEART LONGS FOR LOVED ONES, ABOUT WHOM AND WHEN YOU THINK. Also he guides further by saying: THERE IS NO HARM IN ASKING FOR A WOMAN'S HAND INDIRECTLY, also He warns: BUT DO NOT UTTER ANY COMMITMENTS ON YOUR OWN BEFORE THE MARRIAGE, LET DESTINY'S TIME COME WHEN THE WRITTEN THING WOULD OCCUR." As I do not recall reading anything like this. thanks
Salam dear Sister Lis,
Please sister only enter Islam for Allah's sake and not your boyfriend. There are a lot of Islamic resources to help you to learn and understand Islam and eventually inshaAllah accepting it. And your first resource is the Quran.
Please pick up a Quran with english translation and read line by line. Please be very patience and sincere when trying to find the true Creator of all things and that is Allah.
Let us know if you need any help and we would inshaAllah be more than willing to help you in this phase of your life. And one more thing, please tell the guy that your with that you need sometime (day, week, months or even probably year/s) to look into Islam and so he should not contact you, plus boyfriend and girlfriend in Islam is not allowed- it is regarded as SIN. Therefore, please sister, take this opportunity and learn about Islam instead of fixing your marriage to be life.
Oh and please watch this short sweet youtube video:
Street Dawah
I wish you well and if you need help then inshAllah we are to help you 🙂
Parveen
-x-
Peace be unto you sister..., we are really honoured for you trusting and asking your question here... Before i give you my humble advice, it would be better i elaborate on some of the concept of the muslims beleive... Muslims beleive, worship, and submit to the will and plan of the one true God called Allah in arabic language . The God that create everything that exist or has existed in the heavens and the earth. The God that is not begotten and also does not beget, ie He neither has parents nor sons or children because He's far far above having son or parent and it does'nt befit his majesty. Everyone in the heavens and the earth comes to him as a slave.. Also muslims beleive in all the prophets and messangers sent by God ranging from Adam, noah, salih,..., abraham,..., moses,..., jesus and the last and final slave and massanger of God ie muhammad pbuh. All these massangers are also the pious slaves of Allah sent to guide human kind to roughtousness which will lead them to God... Also muslims believe in jesus as a massanger sent by God, as the massiah, as a slave to God., jesus is not a son of God and is not a God incanate. He performs miracles by God's permission (as the present day bible also confirms). Muslims also beleive in the torah given to moses in his life time (not the present books attributed to moses which were and recorded by other people decades or centuries after his demise). Muslims also beleive in the gospel preached by jesus in his life time before his ascending to heaven (and not the present new testements which where recorded by some people after his demise).. . the essence of the teachings of all these prophets and massangers are the same although the rulings and the laws may vary. All of these prophets and massangers are muslims since they believe and serve the one true God, worship HIM alone and totally submit to HIS WILL AND PLANS. Beside islam been the true religion of God, it is also a way of life. So my sister, before accepting islam, study it and be very sure of it.. Dont accept the religion until and unless your are convinced that it is the true religion of God... . If you are really true to your self and you seek the path and guidiance of Allah, sure Allah will guide you, He will never ever misguide you because He loves you.. MAY HE GUIDE YOU TO HIS PATH.. Ameeen
Dear Lis,
Like you I also grew up in a Catholic family and I fell in love with a Muslim. I identify with your story, except that mine is much more than a conversion to Islam, but certainly I tell you and advise you not to convert to Islam just for the sake of your boyfriend. As some siblings in Islam had said, do research, read, and ask about Islam but the most important has to be that your conversion has to come from the depths of your heart, not for the love of a man.
In my case I spent long time with my "boyfriend" and we lived together. And I was always wondered why the beliefs of Islam or because of what they do certain things but one day he gave me a Qur'an with English translation, which I started to read in secret because I did not want people to think I was doing it to please him. I wanted that if any day I became Muslim have to be because i truly feel it inside my heart. Every day my desire to know more about Islam took me to get to know a mosque, to fast a few days of Ramadan to feel what Muslim people felt and what they do that, to pray the 5 times a day, to celebrate the Eid's, etc, etc, etc. and the result of all this was my conversion to Islam.
Now I am no longer with my "boyfriend" even I do love him but I have peace in my heart that Allah guided me the right path of salvation for me and my coming daughter. As a person told you before, if you do the Shahada be 100% honest with yourself because Allah is all knower and aware of everything and you just gonna foolish yourself by converting because the name of "love", if you do it from your heart you will be like a new born baby.
I'm talking to you from the bottom of my heart, and i'm been sincere with you. My Muslim boy left me while I'm pregnant but my conversion to Islam is true because i know that is not the fault of the religion is just a mistake of a human being that call himself a Muslim, if my conversion is false i'll left the religion at the same time he left me, but moreover i found peace on it while all this pain had happened (and this was just almost 3 months ago). So think about what we all advice you, don't do anything until you are 100% sure that your conversion is because you believe in what the Qur'an says.
Best luck and may Allah guide you,
Maria.
Asalamu alykum wr wb
I would add to this after all these important advises u got from these fellow muslim brothers and sisters. i would like to sya although it is good to be 100% sure that ur converting for the right reason but at the same time when u start to have a small minor feeling about entering the religion of ISLAM, satan tries to do his bit by whispering in your ears and making u doubt about your decision. he wouldnt want u to find the truth and would want u to stay as you are
so my advice to u is although ur trying to find a good reason at the same time think that untill you say the shahada (to witness that allah is the only 1 and true god and muhammed peace be upon him is his messenger) you will not find a solution to ur confusion, in fact u will find urself in more confusion so save urself the hassel and trust ur instinct
as soon as you enter the religion of ISLAM you will find ease and feel like a burden has been lifted from you.
i would strongly advice you not to spend more time trying to find the reason why as satan (devil) will have the opportunity to make u go back from what you want.
take the chance and see how you feel
and i hope allah makes it easier for u to find the truth
good luck
Very good point safiya!!!., i really miss that. Jazak Allah khair. .