Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Should I stop praying?

Muslim woman praying at the Blue Mosque in Turkey

Assalamualaikum..

I'll jump straight on to the question ..m 22 year old.. when I was 19,I  was told that when you will grow up ,you will get married to so n so guy . Not only my parents were ready but also his.

I never met him, I don't even know his name. All I know bout him is that he is my father's ,best friend's son.

But around last year he got engaged to someone nd they rejected me because they thought I was too young for him..

My question is that,I still pray to get married to him..Idk what sort of feeling I ve for him..Should I pray to get him back or not..I feeling guilty of asking him in my prayers..Is it haram for me to pray and ask him,in my prayers..When is already engaged??

Thank for reading...May Allah bless you all.

Malala


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7 Responses »

  1. Assalamo alaikum sister

    I know it hurts to get rejected due to age or other reason, but you have to face the fact. If he want to marry someone, you cant force him to marry you because you have feeling for him. If you do pray for him, pray for his well-being and wish him the best. I know you wont have the heart to pray for him with best when he will be with someone else. As human being we can try our best to find a husband that might fit for us, but if that person you want so much does not accept you, it means Allah didnt gave permission to marry to each other. Whatever Allah does, he does it for the best. Even though yours and his parents made some kind of promise, but the last decision will be his to make. Dont stop praying and making dua for you to find a husband. Pray to Allah to find a better husband for you, Inshallah Allah will find so much better than this guy. You are young right now and you have plenty of time for marriage so dont stress out for this guy. It is normal to feel this pain in your mind and heart, as time passes your body and mind will ease, Inshallah.

    Best of luck!
    May Allah help you

    • Thank you sister
      U won't believe ,the day I posted this question ..Allah answers me..I received his wedding card same day..
      It's been a while and m all okay now..

  2. Walaikum Asalaam Malala,

    That really sucks I'm sorry to hear that. It's not cool to be told you will be married to so and so and then be told you won't be. I can understand your pain and confusion because I'm sure you must have had your heart set on this guy you were supposed to marry.
    However, keep in mind that things happen for a reason. Allah probably had different plans set for you even though your parents had something else planned.
    And Allah is the best of planners, so if you can understand that, then you will not have a problem grasping this change of heart from these people.
    Bring yourself at ease by praying to Allah and give yourself lots of time to heal (depending on how attached you were to him).
    Also, get yourself busy with some kind of activity so you're not thinking and dwelling about him all the time.

    You're in my prayers.

    Love,
    Em

  3. Can you have any feeling for him at all when you do not know him? Or do you have feelings for the picture in your mind that your imagination painted of him?

  4. Peace be on you,

    Even if everybody in the world wants bad for you, Allah always wants good for you and Allah knows what is good for you, so pray to Allah to give you the best husband which Allah wants for you, not some particular husband.

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