We’d Like to Adopt a Child in UK
We'd like to become parents
Aslamu alycum
I am 43 years married Muslim woman. I read lots of stories from this site and I really found it very helpful.
Actually we are Muslim couple with no children and wants to adopt a Muslim newborn baby. And when I saw your website, I feel that you will help me for this. We have applied here in the UK for adoption but we are facing problems due to the whole process and laws.
If you could help us then we will be able to be a future MOM and DAD.
Please reply me as soon as possible.
Regards,
- Sajida
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Dear Sister Sajida, wa alaykum as-salam wa rahmatullah,
I think it's wonderful that you want to adopt a Muslim child and give him or her a good life, Insha'Allah. There is a great reward for this in Islam.
It is related by Sahl ibn Saad (R.A.) that Rasulullah (pbuh) said "Whoever supports an orphan from among his own or any other family, he will be as close to me in Heaven as these fingers are close to each other." Sahl (R.A.) says that Rasulullah made a motion of his index and middle fingers (while he said this) and there was only a little space between the two.
Abu Hurairah (R.A.) reports that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) stated "Whoever caresses the head of an orphan (in affection), solely for the sake of Allah, a good deed will be written to his account for every hair over which he passed his hand, and whoever treated an orphan (boy or girl) with goodness and kindness, he and I will be close to each-other in Heaven as these two fingers." The Prophet (pbuh) made a gesture with his fingers as explained above.
So it's really an important and compassionate act.
Also, I am glad that you have found this website to be helpful Alhamdulillah.
I wish I could help you with your struggle to adopt a child, but I have no expertise in this area. I am sure you already know much more than me about the adoption process in the UK. So I don't know what I could do for you. I suggest you consult a lawyer (solicitor) who specializes in family matters, and get some guidance on how to proceed.
Best Regards,
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Assalamu alaikum,
There should be more Muslim's like you and your husband. Prophet Muhammad(PBUH) said " A person who cares for an orphaned child will be in paradise with him". What a great blessing for you, and a great deed you have done for the child.
I am not familiar with the adoption process in the UK but I know that in the US it is very expensive to adopt. There is so much red tape and legal expenses that it makes it almost impossible for the average person to adopt a child. You can try looking at Muslim countries but I think that would be very difficult also. I know that there is a need because there are so many Muslim children without a family.
If going through an adoption agency is not what you want, you could try the foster care system. There are children in the foster care system who can be adopted. There are also Muslim children in it as well. Here is the catch, when you ask about the Muslim children you are told that they don't keep track of the religion. That is a lie. My wife and I are raising two Muslim children who were once in foster care. We are the legal guardians because the courts system did not sever the ties between them and the parents. In our case the children were constantly placed in Christian homes. The foster system does not do a good job trying to place these children in an environment that was similar to what they were use to. To be fair to the foster care system, I'm not sure how many Muslim families have taken the time to go through the classes to become foster parents. In the US you have to go through training. Each state has their own set of rules and regulations.
If you want to adopt a child through the foster care system the first thing that has to happen after you have completed your training is that the legal system will sever ties with the natural parents. That only happens if the parents are unable to care for the children and there are no other family members around who are willing to take them in. If the parents are alcoholics or addicted to drugs or are very violent these could be reasons for the legal system to sever ties.
We were asked if we wanted to foster or adopt. You may have a choice in the UK. If you choose to adopt, whether you go through the foster system or through an actual adoption agency, try to do as much homework as possible. Try to find out as much about the parents as possible. Ask a lot of questions. Why were the children given up or taken away from the parents. Is there a history of mental illness in the family? I can't tell you enough that you have to do you homework.
Alhamdulillah!!!!!! You have found a child that you want to take home. What a great thing you have done. Now you have to do what is correct according to Islam. Prophet Muhammad, (PBUH) said, " A person who cares for an orphan child will be in paradise with him."
When you adopt a child the ties are never to be severed. I understand that in order for you to be able to adopt the legal system must sever the ties, but it is your responsibility to never keep from the child who the biological parents are. This is especially true as they get older and they begin to ask questions about why they don't look like the other family members. You have to tell them.
The Quran says," "...Nor has He made your adopted sons your (biological) sons. Such is (only) your (manner of) speech by your mouths. But Allah tells (you) the Truth, and He shows the (right) Way. Call them by (the names of) their fathers; that is juster in the sight of Allah. But if you know not their father's (names, call them) your brothers in faith, or your trustees. But there is no blame on you if you make a mistake therein. (What counts is) the intention of your hearts. And Allah is Oft-Returning, Most Merciful."
(Qur'an 33:4-5)
If you choose to adopt a child it here are a few things you should know.
An adopted child retains his or her own biological family name (surname) and does not change his or her name to match that of the adoptive family.
An adopted child inherits from his or her biological parents, not automatically from the adoptive parents.
When the child is grown, members of the adoptive family are not considered blood relatives, and are therefore not muhrim to him or her. "Muhrim" refers to a specific legal relationship that regulates marriage and other aspects of life. Essentially, members of the adoptive family would be permissible as possible marriage partners, and rules of modesty exist between the grown child and adoptive family members of the opposite sex.
If the child is provided with property/wealth from the biological family, adoptive parents are commanded to take care and not intermingle that property/wealth with their own. They serve merely as trustees.
Again, I am so happy that you are even looking into adopting. My intent was not to scare you but to give you a little insight into what you may encounter when trying to adopt. I hope what I said helped. There is so much more that can be said but keeping it simple is much better.
I pray that Allah(swt) will make it easy for you.
Your Brother in Islam
Abdul Wali
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Salaam my Sister,
What a beautiful and wonderful thing you are both doing mashaAllah! :0)
The first step would be to read up on government procedures and processes and then follow the steps as they are laid out. You can find everything you need to know about adoption in the UK at this web address:
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Adoptionfosteringandchildrenincare/AdoptionAndFostering/index.htm
I pray you and your child-to-be are united soon inshaAllah,
Peace,
Leyla
Editor, Islamic Answers
INSHALLAH u guys will find a loving child. Please keep us informed when u do fnd a blessing
Salaam try http://www.islamicfostering.com based in London and they may have more know how iA.
Alhumdulillah, you're going to adopt a child! We're in the States and are in the process of becoming licensed foster parents with the option of adopting at some point. We actually planned to do this before we were even married.
I want to write in response to Br. Abdul Wali's post. The Islamic legal requirements that he listed are true, but I want to add in a caution about them, with all due respect to the brother.
These lists of legalities are often tossed around in a way that ends up acting as a deterrent to adoption, with the result of too many kids not having a real family. I think it might be helpful to frame these legalities in the context of Islam providing the best protection for an individual's spiritual and psychological life. Human beings have a drive to know who they are and biological origins are part of that drive. Even if a child has never met his or her parents, they want to know as much as possible about them. Aside from that, high quality medical care can require a detailed medical history and sometimes access to very well matched tissue (transplants, blood, etc.) I can only speak for the US, but for a period of time in the States, children were often not told that they were adopted and if they found out later in life, it was devastating. They were also not given any information that would allow them to find their biological parents. The psychological scars were profound. Now 'open adoption' is widely encouraged and it is very common for adoptive families to keep in contact with birth families, even to the point of monthly visits, or even more frequently than that. The result is a much happier child.
Islam very explicitly preserves this openness. It also allows flexibility in social circumstances. These days, the majority of children who are adopted won't be inheriting anything from their biological parents because there is nothing to inherit. However, you most certainly can leave quite a bit to an adopted child, it just wouldn't be automatic, you would have to state it in a will.
An adoptive relationship is profound. You raise this child, you love them, you educated them, you provide for them in the way you would for your own children. You clothe them the same, you give them a new bike along with your other kids, you send them to the same schools, they're in your family photographs, they're in your heart. And they have their own history separate from yours. Just honor it.
And yes, an adopted child can technically marry your own children, but it doesn't mean they should or in their wildest dreams would want to.
Also, if you are interested, you can actually lactate with the help of hormonal therapy and a dedicated breast pumping regime. If you nurse this child (you are interested in an infant, I understand), they would be mahram to you and yours, which makes everything simpler if mahram/non-mahram seems a big issue.
I personally think privacy wouldn't be a big deal unless a family has a habit of wearing very revealing clothing in the house. Just get into a rhythm of life that gives people privacy from the beginning and it will never feel awkward or exclusionary later in life.
I'm always pleased to find other Muslim families who want to adopt children. In the Christian community here in the States, adoption is very common and supported. God grant that the Muslim community worldwide begins to more fully embrace raising children at risk in real family homes.
Alhumdulillah this is such a beautiful gift we can give a child a happy home and environment, i am also looking to adopt a muslim child and give him or her the best upbringing possible, i have a daughter (4 years of age) but want to complete my family with a sibling and adopt a child who needs love and a happy home.
any help or advice would be much appreciated.
lubna
Asalaam-u-Alaikum,
I don't want to end my life, am innocent,
i don't know what to do with my life just because of my small family creating problems for me, i tried all to solve it but they just want me to get out of home or be a maid in the house,,,they don't let me study or work, and also create misunderstandings for me with relatives ,friends and neighbourhood,,, i am a brilliant child;i have been it since little, very caring and peace loving but my owns are not such.....am still young but very helpless, i prayed a lot; InshAllah, i wish to live with a peaceful supportive family and study, anyone who can help me to please inform me soonest possible.....
Sister sara, please log in and write your question as a separate post, thank you.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Hi I'm Muslim and due to have a baby in 5 days and am looking into giving up my baby to a Muslim family all I ask is that your liberal Muslims give it a happy home and love the baby like your own. I want to leave baby with someone who meets my criteria of being good Muslims who have a good liberal attitude care for the baby , I want u to make him into a good human being a kind person and well grounded.
Sister sajida reinforce my trust in u and please contact me thankyou any enquires welcome
Shamila, first I encourage you to keep your baby. No matter what you may think, a baby needs its mother. Secondly, this website is not an adoption agency, so please do not "welcome inquiries" from strangers.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Assalaam alaikum,
. we are located in USA, muslim couple and looking fro adoption sister shamila if you are interested you can contact .
This is not an adoption agency. If you are interested in adoption, use a legal method.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Hi r u still looking for adoption for your child shamila? Im looking to adopt muslim child girl 0 3 years married for ten years with no luck
You cannot adopt a child through our website. Go through a registered adoption agency, either in your country or in one of the countries that are hosting thousands of Muslim orphans.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
hi ,my name is sehrish, i am in 38 weeks pregnant and am due in couple of weeks time. i am not able to look after my child so i am looking for a muslim family to adopt my son.
sehrish, I deleted your contact information. I strongly suggest that you try to place your child with one of your relatives, rather than give your child away to a stranger. Let an aunt, cousin, grandparent, etc., take care of your child.
Who knows, maybe later your situation will change and you will want your child back.
If you have no relatives or friends who can care for your child, then use a reputable adoption agency. Do not give your child to strangers over the internet! Use your common sense in these matters.
May Allah help you and make it easier for you.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
I think it is really nice to think of adopting a child......cos the u go to heaven that is what prophet mohammed said (may peace be upon him)!
May u quickly find a child to adopt!
Bye!
AOA
Mera name...
[Editor's note: Please write comments in English if possible. Please note that this website provides advice on family and marriage matters, and cannot become involved in adoption processes.]
AOA,
I am. 43 year old women and happily married with a 5 year old boy, masha Allah well settled and looking to adopt a baby. The reason for adoption is that my husband is not able to have more children due to his operation due to cancer. I would love to adopt a baby to give a child the love and attention they deserve, a brother and sister for my son, sawaab and Allahs happiness.
The child will have a loving family and security.
If anyone can help please email me.
Thanks
Mrs Alisha Ahmed
Alisha, you should see a proper adoption agency, whether in your country or in one of the Muslim countries that has suffered from disaster or strife. You cannot find a child on the internet.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Hello m divorced mother of a 13 years old boy . I don't have any financial support to support my son that's why m searching those Muslims parents who want to adopt children or a people who give financial support to them .please o need help from all of you ..m waiting
Regards
Saeeda, you cannot just give away your child to strangers. What are you thinking? Ask a relative for assistance, or let your son go stay with an aunt, uncle or cousin until you get on your feet financially. Or with a trusted friend. Also, if you are in a Western country then see what government assistance is available to you.
Furthermore, your son might be able to work part time to generate some income.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Hi we are interested in adopting a muslim baby. We are a professional couple and financially well off. Please contact me on ******
Regards
We do not allow the posting of private contact info. You cannot shop for a baby randomly on the web. You should see an adoption agency, perhaps in one of the Muslim countries that are hosting thousands or even millions of orphans.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Salaam alaykum.. do you have any recommendations to which agency is good to help in adopting a muslim baby. I have contacted a few in west london and they have all said they have no babies up for adoption.
Hi are you still looking to adopt a child? And will you be living in the U.K.?
Have you registered with any agency? I am looking to adopt but its better its done through the right channels
Assalamu alaikum,
I am 4 weeks pregnant and I do not want to have a termination due to many reasons. This baby was conceived out of wedlock and I am only 20 years old still studying in university, I want to carry on. I would happily give my baby away. This would give a chance for a Muslim family who are willing to give the baby a stable home (loving and financially stable) as I am not able to do so.
If anyone could give me some advice on what to do through the procedure I would be very thankful. I am also based in the UK will this make it any harder to find Muslim parents for the baby?
Thank you
Sister the best advice is that you raise that child. No one can love and nurture that child better than you. The sin has already been committed so just do right by your child and you will see how much of a blessing children are