Monday, June 28, 1999
Assalamu Alaykum. I have a sister who is a young divorcee;
she has 3 children and she works day and night to support them.
Her husband abandoned her after 10 years of marriage; he fell
in love with a Christian woman colleague of his, who later left
and married a coreligionist. In the meantime, he had destroyed
his family. He beat up my sister. When she came to my parents'
home, she had a black eye and a broken nose because he had lost
his psychological balance and the fear of God.
She is only 35, attractive, intelligent, religious. We are
a respectable family and too proud to advertise our grief. How
can she re marry in a society (Pakistan) where divorce is a stigma
and children are a burden instead of "the flowers of Allah"
as the Prophet called them?
Dear "Concerned Relative,"
First, let me commend you for your loving
support of your sister . This is surely in keeping with the TRUE
SPIRIT OF ISLAM! (Your question brought tears to my eyes.) The
situation you described is so far from what Allah(swt) and His
Prophet(saw) want for a Muslim wife! Physical abuse of such a
magnitude is sorely HATED by any "right-thinking" Muslim.
The question of re-marriage for a Muslim
lady after such a bad marriage should not be an issue for any
Muslim. Unfortunately, many Muslim countries have lost some of
the TRUE SPIRIT of Islam in their cultural practices. If we reflect
on the life of the Prophet (saw), we will surely see that such
thinking is in contradiction to his words and his examples. JUSTICE
and KINDNESS toward women were important concerns of his.
Fortunately, there are Muslims in every
country who are trying to practice theTRUE spirit of ISLAM! I
would encourage you to seek out those Muslims and interact with
them. Even in this modern age when mankind has come a long way
in terms of human rights (though we still have a long way to
go), the concept that a man/woman be judged by the content of
their character (the knowledge of which lies only with Allah)
is still a "revolutionary" and yet unattained concept
in this world.
This is the TRUE SPIRIT of ISLAM. May
Allah bless you and your family and grant you success in your