Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Older man wants me to move in without marriage

Muslim woman

Salaam alekum,

I am a muslim girl, I am university graduate, and I do have a good job. I met this guy who is 30 years old than me in the job, he is a muslim too, I felt he needed someone because he was alone, and besides that age discrimination is bad, so I talked with him, and got connected, because he was the only one person I have talked with. At first I did not know he has all the businesses, my intention was to have a good caring partner, I was alone too, because I don't go much out, and I don't do al the crazy staff, I just read books,

At first he was doing nikah, because we are muslims, then his family got involved, and he changed his mind, he says he will not do nikah, he wants me to move in with him instead. I am confused now what he wants,
now I feel sad, because he is my only friend, but he saying all these things,
or should I just stop talking and find another muslim man? because honestly as a muslim woman I follow all those good things, still I feel alone.

thank you so much,

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10 Responses »

  1. Moving in means? You guys are already committing zina(adultry) find someone and have nikkah. Zina never leads you anywhere in life we always have regrets all our life after doing it.

  2. He is cheating and he dies not have attentions about you. He just want to use you and leave. Forget about him and find someone else according to your age. Be Muslim and remains Muslim and follow the Muslim rules. Thanks

  3. Nikah is the most important step to make your relationship more strong, Nikah teach us the real meaning of relationship and trust. You should choose a man who strongly believe in Nikah because it is the thing to feel you the taste of soul...I have the same Condition and I left the girl who did not take interest in Nikah... You always welcome

    Best regards

  4. Assalaamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakaatu.

    And what will you do if Allah subhanawataalah asks you to move in with him to the hell fire, sister?

  5. YA ALLAH I AM TIED. I GAVE NIEL A CHANGED I GAVE HIM EVERYTHING! WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT ME EVERYONE I GIVE A CHANCE TO THEY HURT ME WHATS THE POINT TREATING PEOPLE SO GOOD AND BEING SO NICE TO IF EVERYONE WILL JUST HURT YOU WHATS THE POINT. WHAT DIDNT I DO FOR HIM EVERYTHING HE WANTED I GAVE HIM I GAVE HIM TIME AND BE THERE HIM WHATS THE POINT YA ALLAH IF YOU DONT LOOK A SLIM AND PRETTY NO ONE WANTS TO GIVE YOU A CHANCE WHAT DIDNT I DO FOR NEIL YA ALLAH WHAT DIDNT I GIVE HIM . I AM TIED I GIVE UP I WISH I WAS DIED THEN BEING ALIVE BE WITH PEOPLE ARE SO SELFISH AND MEAN AND WANT TO CLOSE YOU OUT OF THERE LIFE NO REASON OR STOP CALLING YOU AND MSG YOU FOR NO REASON WHEN YOU DIDNT DO ANYTHING WRONG TO THEM. THEY CANT EVEN HAVE THE THING TO SEE YOU ALIVE OR CALL YOU OR EVEN SHOUT YOU A MSG . YA ALLAH I FEEL LIKE THE DAY OF JUDGEMENT IS COMING FAST AND SOON. YA ALLAH MAKE MY DUAS COME TRUE AMEEN AMEEN AMEEN AMEEN

  6. Utter Rubbish

    1 - What is Neka ?

    2 - He is 30 yrs old in job. What does it mean ? His age is 30 yrs or he is 30 yrs older to you ? Also how many years is the age difference between you and your father ?

    3 - Move in ? Stop slugging. When he doesnt wants to marry you.. why does he even wants you to move in with him ? And where ? His parents are okay with all this bullying ?

    4 - Confused about ? About moving in with him or not ?

    Grow up and get a life.. you arent immature since you are working. Have some sense. Just by believing in Islam and doing good things yet getting confused about all these horrible things doesnt makes you a Pious Muslim. For that pious NIYAT is required foremost.

    Good Luck

  7. Eww he is 30 years older than you. Are you that desperate and lonely for attention. He just wants to have sex that’s it. You are naive. Find someone your age. Get yourself busy, find a hobby.

  8. End your relationship with the man who is so much older than you. It appears that he is lying to you, is too weak to make up his own mind about who he wants to marry, or both. He claims his family is opposed to him marrying you, but he wants you to live with him. Wake up. You are being played. You don't need someone like that in your life. If he is wealthy, he is using that to tempt you into a haram relationship. Or he is some kind of loser. Which explains why he is older and unmarried. If that is even the truth.

    You mentioned you don't go out much, that you don't do all the "crazy stuff". You seem to be confused. There are hundreds of things a decent Muslim woman can do to be active and busy in her life that is not being some kind of hermit or doing "crazy stuff". Also, when you meet a man who is interested in you, introduce him to your father. If you are a college graduate, stop calling yourself a girl. You are an adult. Start acting like one.

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