Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Advice needed on moving on from heartbreak

Heartbroken, broken heart

Heartbroken.

I recently had my heart broken from a 3 year relationship. I found out 2 weeks ago that my boyfriend had been diagnosed cancer which has spread. Doctors say five years - It hasn't sunk in yet. To top that ... He tells me he has been engaged to his cousin (also with cancer - doctors say 6 years) since he was 10 and only found out recently. He was emotionally blackmailed by his family into going along with all this. Two days after the break-up I see him be affectionate to the girl he's engaged to in the comments section on Instagram. I am just filled with heart ache .. I just wanted some advice on how I can move on as quickly as possible as my exams are also 2 months away. I feel like my emotions have been played around with and as if I have been cheated by life . I'm just really confused.

zarinakhan


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6 Responses »

  1. Read more about Destiny and taqdir
    Pray to Allah
    Do some zikr, read quran and durood sharif for peace of heart.

    Trust me ive had a very difficult life too. But then i count my blessings and Look at the sufferings of people in Syria and yemen for example..

    Do you think they can even think of love and relationships in a war torn country.
    I dont know if that helps. the point is we must be patient with our destinies. It will not be easy. Life is a test.

    Nothing is permanent

  2. Cancer is not such an easy diagnosis and that too two people of same family?? Wow!

    It is a devastating diagnosis, preceeded by some prolonged illness which you would have known about if you were friends with him for 3 long years. Seems the guy is taking you for quite a ride.

    Block him on all social media for now. Make a time table for your study and stick to it. Make friends from your classes with whom you can discuss studies and plans and who will encourage you with your studies. Make a conscious effort to divert yourself whenever you start to think of him. Just keep yourself fully occupied. Zikr, astaghfar all strengthen the heart and you must make a practise of them besides the Fard Salah.

  3. OP: I recently had my heart broken from a 3 year relationship. I found out 2 weeks ago that my boyfriend had been diagnosed cancer which has spread. Doctors say five years - It hasn't sunk in yet. To top that ... He tells me he has been engaged to his cousin (also with cancer - doctors say 6 years) since he was 10 and only found out recently.

    cancer spread.......five years.....doesn't sound real.
    He is going to marry his cousin. He just used you for sex.
    Happens a lot, boys love girls but end up marrying their cousins. He was engaged to his cousin when he was 10 and poor guy did not know it.

  4. I totally get where you're coming from. My ex who I was suppose to marry this summer did me so horribly and I was left so heartbroken. But after month I'm healing, what helped was praying, talking to my lord, getting rid of everything that reminded me of him. Social media is a big thing, delete him from everywhere including his number too. Keeping busy and taking care of yourself, I got a job right after everything happened and it's been helping me because now I have money to do whatever I truly want instead of being home in my bed crying over him. It's all about finding things that make you happy sis. Please put yourself first because I know how it truly feels. All the best inshallah and happy early Ramadan. I feel as Ramadan is the best time to heal esp for heartbreak.

  5. Learn quran read quran understand the power of quran....Know that SHAITAN cannot come near you when you make the quran your life...for it will give everything you need ....peace tranquility blessings happiness noor etc...it doesn't end.

  6. Thank you so much for the advise, it's really helped and I no longer feel alone. However, I still sometimes stalk his social media to find pictures of them together, he would call me from private number and tell me that his cancer was cured and that be broke off the engagement with the girl and convinced me to get back with him. I refused to get back with him, I don't think I can put myself through that again. This was followed by him informing me that the cancer has now returned, but now has been diagnosed with a mental health problem (multiple personality disorder) Now that I've seen the pair on social media, I can't help but feel jealousy, I wish I could fight the feeling. I really want to get over it.

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