Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Am I divorced?

law fiqh marriage divorce

My husband sent me divorce papers. 4 months have lapsed he has not provided me of children with any financial support, took my gold jewellery and money from bank all savings put injunction on saving and now wants to reconcile.

I can't trust him, but am I divorced as 4 months have lapsed?

Pls let me know. He controlled me for 22 years. Isolated me from family, he controlled my money and made every decision. Please help

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3 Responses »

  1. Asalaamualaykum Sister,

    I will refrain from sharing the little knowledge I have on this matter as I do not wish to mis-advise you.

    This is a Fiqh related matter and I will advise you to consult with a qualified Imam/Mufti.

    SisterZ Senior Editor

  2. Assalam Alekum Sister,

    So...after four months he wants to reconcile? What...doesn't he have anyone to wash his clothes or cook his dinner? What is there to save here? The only thing to save here is you. Contact your family and seek help and guidance from them. No one deserves to be treated this way no matter how many years you've been married. Do not go back to him simply out of fear that you cannot make it on your own. You may have been controlled over the last 22 years but you are in control now. You do have a choice here and the choice is yours...NOT his. May Allah give you the strength to do whatever it is you need to do. Know that you are not alone and Allah sees and hears all. Allah loves you.

  3. Sister "eagle", it certainly sounds like you are divorced, but I cannot say for sure. You need to speak to the Imam in your area and explain the circumstances.

    I do have a suggestion. Without making any promises to him, tell him that before any discussion about reconciliation, he must return your jewelry and your share of the savings. That way you can tell right away if he is sincere and has changed his ways. If he returns them, you are still under no obligation to reunite with him. It's up to you.

    Wael Editor

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