Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Am I misusing my ability to control my dreams?

dreams dreamt

Assalamualaikum to all those who work tirelessly to solve our often "silly" problems, like the one I'm about to write.

Ok so I'm 15, and home schooling, which has its own benefits, for example I stayed away from unappropriate stuff for a long time. However, during the summer vacations, I developed this masturbation problem. I was doing it about once every two days, and the guilt was just killing me. I had the most unpleasant vacations ever.

However, as I came back to studying I overcame shaytans whispers, but really slowly and I really regret that. I haven't done this shameful act for more than a month alhumdulillah, may Allah keep me on this track.

Now time for the question. So because I am home schooling, I usually get a lot of free time, which I unfortunately feel hasn't benefitted me as much as it could've. So now that I can study whenever I want. I often sleep a few hours after fajr(a sleep pretty late). So I don't know what's wrong with me but when I sleep during this time I can sometimes wake myself up at will, actually many times this has happened. I used to think this only happens that I go into a state of semi unconsciousness when I sleep on the left side, but it also happens when I sleep on the right side. I found out that I'm also able to somewhat control my dreams at this time. It's just very weird.

Just a few days before I made myself have a wet dream. I was dreaming that was with that girl. Now the thing is I knew it was nothing more than a dream. So I made myself dream that you know... Had.... Know the thing is I made myself dream this, and I also could have made myself not doing the thing, it's so weird. Do I have some mental disorder or something? And I also ejaculated that day, from that wet dream, and I feel very guilty about it. Because I forced myself that wet dream, it didn't come naturally, so... It's a sin right?

And it gets even weirder because when I'm able to control my dreams I don't feel that voice in the back that says don't do it, it's a sin. I mean it's just really weird and hard to explain what I feel. So should I stop sleeping at that time?

I'm sorry for the really long description, hope you understand. Jazakallah khair, Assalamualaikum


Tagged as: , , , , , , , , ,

11 Responses »

  1. I'm really really sorry I didn't search this up on google.(partly because I thought im one of a kind :)) so the name is lucid dreaming and it's actually much more common than you think(or atleast I thought). I read all the islamic threads and fatwas on the internet(a lot atleast).
    Most were very disappointing responses. It went from outright denial of whether lucid dreaming even exists to mistaking it for mastrubation. Though I did find some good responses. Most were from the hadith about you not being accountable for when you are asleep(im not sure exactly what it was). But I wanted to ask whether lucid dreaming will even be considered sleep? I mean you have a lot if control(so wouldn't it be considered similar to being awake?) i have since stopped sleeping at that time though

  2. Keep researching. A quick search on lucid dreams will tell you that you actually don't have as much control over the dream as you think. Just relax.

  3. Assalaamualaikam

    As has already been said, you probably don't have as much control over the dream as you think. Awareness or perceived awareness of dreaming isn't the same as control.

    If this has been a one-off thing, then I wouldn't worry about it. Simply put it out of your mind, and make sure that you are following Islamic guidance about sleep - you might be surprised what a big difference it can make to the quality of your sleep and how you feel in the morning. A lot of guidance is available for us in the sunnah of The Prophet (peace be upon him), for example: sleeping on the right side, doing wudu before going to bed, reciting Surat al-Ikhlas, al-Falaq and An-Nas.

    Midnightmoon editor

  4. salaam.the first time your not to blame the second you are...when people get horny they loose some senses ifu know what I mean... so what u should do is avoid getting horny then you wont do such things in your dreams...I have dreams where I can control it too. .but when you have it in your subconscious mind that something is wrong u won't do it . this also tells uhave a high sexual drive ...if you were not young I'd say you need marriage .when u get use to it u know exactly how and when to control it like I can after fajr and after Thur when I sleep ...when I sleep on my stomach I think it's just sowrong lol to make your own sexual dream because it's all planned and all feels and seems real it's like zina using an illusion to do it .u get what I mean ? so from my side I stopped thou it's really tempting ....imagine afree one night stand with a stranger using your .dreams? totally cool .but seems haraam...but I would also like to know is there any proof of it being Haraam?

    • hanniyyya: when I sleep on my stomach I think it's just sowrong lol to make your own sexual dream because it's all planned and all feels and seems real it's like zina using an illusion to do it .u get what I mean ? so from my side I stopped thou it's really tempting ....imagine afree one night stand with a stranger using your .dreams? totally cool

      when you say it is all planned do you mean you can plan a dream where you can choose what you are going to do and with whom? Does the dream happen right after you go to sleep?

      I feel it may be a stage where you are border line awake and sleep. I don't know if a true dream can be haram because dream has no control over what happens.

      In my opinion a hypersexual person may also get nightmares and fearful dreams because physiological reactions in body may be interpreted as such.

      OP: Just a few days before I made myself have a wet dream. I was dreaming that was with that girl.

      Can you make yourself have a wet dream with a girl of your choice any night you want?
      If some thing happens once that does not mean you can control your dreams.

    • Hanya if you get a wet dream subconciously even if you know what you were dreaming then it is not haram because you couldnt control it. but if you were actually thinking about it and had the dream then its a sin and its haram. we should always try to keep our mind clean.

      • This is not correct, brother. In Islam we are not held accountable for our thoughts as long as we do not act on them. It is true however that we should try to focus our minds on good things and not dwell on haram.

        Wael Editor

  5. You really want control try what I do. When you go to sleep read the Dua for going to sleep. and recite the names of Allah. you will get dreamless sleep. And stop thinking about unnecessary tbings.

  6. Dearest Brother Umair,
    Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah
    I know this reply might be irrelevant now, since its already been very long since you posted this question. But, I couldn't close this page without telling you my experience. I am 25 years old. I am a medical student and I admire psychology. Especially a field called Oneirology, the study of dreams. being a muslim, it was important for me to correlate everything that I learn with the Qur'an and Hadith. I am sure you have done your research well about lucid dreams and certain hadith about dreams. Lucid dreaming is not a sin. It is a beautiful gift. Most people today do not either remember their dreams, nor care anything about them. The Prophet peace be upon him had great regard for dreams and its interpretation. Dreams are also called the 46th part of prophet hood. If you look at other traditions like the taoist and tibetan monks, they found lucid dreaming as a means to mental perfection and enlightenment. So, if you can lucid dream, it is unique. Many people train and spend time to gain this ability. Subahanallah, you got it as a gift. You can use these Lucid Dreams to build environments inside of you and make great use of it. You might know about Abu Sina, he was an extremely talented scholar. He used to read books all day, when he finds a concept difficult or when he is physically tired to read anymore, he goes to sleep, and in his dreams, he reviews everything he read while inside the dream and create ideas or theories. When he wakes up, he writes them down.

    I stumbled upon your article while I was researching about people having lucid dreams after Fajr, since that particular time is one of the best hours to go lucid. Allah is indeed the greatest genius. He gave us muslims certain principles and rules in the form of Islam so that we may keep ourselves away from evil and make ourselves better. You are 15 years old. I was once 15 and yes I had the same desires and temptations as you do now. Contrary to what islamic websites and mufti's with 4 wives say, you do not have to be ashamed about masturbating. Trust me, for the next foreseeable future, your desires will just keep building up. If you do not release your sexual tensions, haram things may overpower your imaan. Unless of course, you have very progressive parents who would get you married by 20. Which I am guessing is not the case. Allah rewards you for every good deed, even when you think about it. And Allah rewards you when a bad deed comes up to your mind and you do not do it. Your fantasies might be many, if you masturbate and let it go, then that will be it. Its something very natural. We muslims are not meant to be some sort of monks, and this is not 7th century Arabia, where we can marry at 15, so releasing our tensions would be the only way. And if you did that in your dream, that is just as normal as you'd do it while you are awake. Be sure not to indulge in crazy pornography, and in time, you'll learn to be busy with a lot of important things in life, and you'll have a strong grip over your desires.

    May Allah watch over you brother.

    I am a medical student

    • AslamoAlikum Brother i am happy to read your reply
      Kindly guide me what if person sees someone who is his family member( Sister etc) and having bad things with them 🙁 ( Not did anything bad just look at them and do something horny and it ejaculates :'( )
      some people says you thing about them thats why you had such dreams etc
      Please guide me i never thought about them :''( i am Elder brother and i have such dirtiest dreams i hate alot it happened me many times
      Now alhumdulillah i am fine i never had such dream but at that time i was very worried why the hell this happening i was guilty
      tell what is reason behind this 🙁
      i also want to have lucid dreams where i wish i could have self control
      many month before whenever i dream i consciously feel that i am dreaming
      i can make my self wake up on my will
      but now i never had a good dream 🙁
      any guidence
      Jazak Allah

    • Brother Talha, did you gave an advice to use private parts other than for wife and for which mentioned in Qur'an? How can you give such advice to our muslim brother. I know that it is too late to reply but instead do never give such advices to anyone else. One can control the temptations if he WILLS to control. Shaytaan gives advices therefore, AT FIRST FIRST THOUGHT (Danger), we should change our state of mind. One masturbates if he further go deeper into such thoughts. Therefore, a person should KILL DANGER at first.
      And please, never give such advices to anyone else.

Leave a Response