Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Asking for forgiveness

I have been married for 3yrs now and previously I was going out with my boyfriend.  We constantly had sex and couldnt resist each other.

Now that I am married, I cant get him out of my head and we do regular see each other aswell.

wudu

"God loves those who repent and who purify themselves" (Surah al-Baqarah, Ayah 222

When we see each other now we do kiss but thats about it.

I have stopped seeing him now as I feel so guilty and dirty.

I want to know what dua/surah I can read to purify me and ask for forgiveness from Allah (swt)

Please help me as now I am trying for a baby and I dont start my monthly cycle and havent done so naturally since April 2009 as now I desperately want kids to complete my family.

Will Allah (swt) forgive me for my sins?

Please help this stressed out sister.

Many Thanks


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5 Responses »

  1. Asalaamualaykum Sameer92,

    Zina is a major sin and unfortunately, one of the consequences of sinning can be in the form of blessings being taken away from us. You must do immense tawbah, Allah says: "Say: O My servants who have transgressed against their own souls, despair not of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Most Forgiving, Most Merciful". (Surah az-Zumar 39:53)

    Vow to mend your ways. You are still alive and have the chance to turn back. Remember Allah's wrath to stop you from going back to indulging in haraam and at the same time keep away from your ex. Strive to purify your heart and soul.

    With regards to conceiving, you should seek medical attention.

    Please see the following links for information on seeking true repentance and also on making dua.

    http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/tawbah-in-islam/
    http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/dua-in-islam/25-duas-from-the-quran/

    I pray you find peace and achieve purification.

    SisterZ
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  2. Salaam,

    I know as a Muslim we should make dua that the poster change her ways and come onto the righteous path. But if I was a husband and I found out my wife had committed zina during the marriage, I would not be forgiving, I would throw her out and not ever contact her again.

    What does this show, how merciful Allah SWT is, how forgiving he is compared to us mere mortals.

    I personally wouldn't give the light of day to someone who's cheated and I know Islam teaches forgiveness, but would anyone blame the husband in this episode to leave this woman and not contact her again?

    Anyways those comments aside, I must acknowledge that a person guilty of a crime and sin like Zina, who truly repents and changes their way will be pure in the heart almost like the day they were born.

    So we make dua that you change your ways, conceal your sins, for Allah will help you conceal them if you are sincere in your repentance.

    May Allah help us all, Oh Allah please help us all from commiting such a grave sin, help us to stay on the righteous path and fight off the shaytaan.

  3. Dear Sister
    Salaams to you I totally agree with the replies above. Best thing you can do is stay away from your ex. Work your marriage with your husband and stop what you doing because it is zina and haraam not fair on your husband. Ask allah for forgiveness. Seek medical advice in regards to having children and start taking multivitamins tablets everyday with B12, Folic Acid, B1, B2, B3, B5, and B6 you can buy these from any supermarket store. Inshallah you will get your monthly cycle back, and also may allah also guide you on the right path.

    • Thank you so much for your response, much appreciated.

      I am so ashammed of myself soo much, that I feel disgusted with myself for sure. I would'nt wish this on anyone.

      Are all these b's that you've mentioned above are they all multivitamin tablets, and would one puit on weight with all of these medicines.

      Kind Regards

  4. I converted as a Muslim for a yr now but still married but separated to Christian man now I want to get married to a also converted Muslim but still I dont have my certificate as a Muslim.. Do I need my certificate before we get married?

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