A Muslim man is the father of my new born baby, who now ignores us
Born out of wedlock
I am a Native American/Mexican woman, I've lived in North America my whole life. I met a Muslim man from Afghanistan and we started seeing each other and fell in love. I will call him “Fred”. I have never met Fred's family and he has never met mine.
Four Months into our relationship I became pregnant. I was happy, but nervous and scared because we hadn't been together very long and I wasn't sure how Fred would react. At first Fred seemed happy and then one day he came to me and told me that he didn't want the baby and said that I would have to choose between him or the baby. It hurt to hear Fred say this or to even think of getting rid of the baby.
I'm not religious but I consider myself to be a spiritual person and do not believe in abortion. I decided that abortion wasn't an option and continued on with my pregnancy. We continued to see each other and the discussion of my pregnancy rarely came up and when it did most of the time Fred would be defencive and not want to talk about it.
While we were together Fred told me that he would be kicked out of his home if he told his family. As far as I know Fred still never told them about the baby and I feel that I have lied to them even though we don't know each other. There were times when Fred would express happiness and interest in my pregnancy and it would make me so happy. I thought that his negativity was just fear and that he would embrace our child after he was born.
I now have a beautiful baby boy who is almost a year old and he's the joy of my life. Unfortunately Fred stopped seeing me shortly before I gave birth and has never met our son. I have tried to contact Fred several times in attempt to have him involved in our son's life. The few times we spoke he said that he would come see our son, but the last time I attempted to speak with Fred he hung up on me without even saying hello and has ignored my calls since.
We never really discussed our religious beliefs while we were together and I don't have much knowledge about Islam other than what I have recently researched online. According to my research pre-maritial sex is frowned upon and having a child before marriage is not allowed. My child would be considered a “Haram Baby” and he would not be accepted as part of Fred's family because he was born out of wed-lock.
In my heart I believe that Fred wanted to have this child with me but has been restricted by his beliefs. I know that he is a good man and he truly loved me. I am still in love with him and hope that someday we might be a family. I'm filled with sadness because my son doesn't have a father.
I'm hurt because I have been left to deal with this alone without explanation. I have done everything for my son and everyday is a struggle mentally, emotionally and physically.
I have been considering filing for child support, but I don't want cause any confrontation with Fred or his family. I'm not interested in money, but I don't think that I should have to take on all of this responsibility by myself. I was hoping he would eventually come around but it's been about a five months since the last time we talked.
I'm searching for an understanding as to why he hasn't taken responsibility for his son and if there will ever be a possibility of him being in our son's life??
I'm curious what might happen if I approach his family with this situation and what it would mean for Fred??
I'm also curious if Fred is never going to be involved in our sons life, what can I do to teach our son about his culture??
I don't wish to offend anyone so please correct me if I'm wrong about the information I've researched.
- Janet
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Hello Janet,
Im sorry to hear you are in this situation and that your son does not have a father in his life. Unfortunatly, this happens so often, not only in a muslim case but overall. for whatever reason "fred" has, it seems like he does not want to be part of your sons life, I think you will have to continue raising your little one on your own. Filling for child support has nothing to do with you needing the money or not, this is for the baby, its his right and "fred s" responsibility. Dont worry about what his family will say, after all its HIS family and he did not think about that before. It is a good idea to not only teach your baby about his culture but also about this amazing religion, islam. Dont let this bad experience interfere with your religious search. I hope God can guide you and strengthen you as I know it will not be easy doing it on your own. I once heard from a catholic friend, " God will not give you a cross he knows you cant carry"... It may be difficult but he is the all knowing!
Amira
Thank you for sharing your words, but I still want to have a better understanding of things before I proceed with filing for child support. I posted another comment, if you can share any more of your thoughts it would be greatly appreciated.
Janet
Hi Janet,
Sorry to hear that you are suffering. I agree with Amira; their are bad men in all societies, cultures, religions etc etc. Whatever happened is in the past and you both were played a part in bringing this child into this world, hence the responsibility is shared too. This site is full of such stories and is not the only forum, their are thousands of cases all over the world where these Muslim men went behind their parents back and commit haram including having girlfriends, drinking, clubbing etc etc.
No Abrahamic religion permits per-marital relationships not even platonic let alone physical ones and their is a reason for that. I would suggest you to please contact his family and claim child support as every child has a right to be grow up in a happy home knowing his both parents. It is not child's fault that he is in this world; he is result of your haram relationship but he is not haram, that's a gross misconception/ignorance.
Janet, you have a good heart after all what this "Fred" put you through but still you care for him. Clearly, he is a loser; but for the sake of your child put all these thoughts aside like "what Fred will think"? "How his family will think"? etc etc. He had the time to think, now it's time to act like a man rather than being a coward. Your baby is a reality, a living being he needs to man up and take responsibility rather than playing around nice guy.
Had he cared about his religion, culture, parent's reputation or even loved you; he would have not chosen the route that he choose. He would introduce you to his family if he saw you as a wife, would have asked your hand in marriage from your father (off course if his folks agreed) and married you. This all may not make sense to you but this is how it is for us Muslims, their is no girlfriend/boyfriend thing or any other route. You are not doing anything wrong at all; as it's his duty to be there for his son that he brought in this world and child has the right to know who his father was. There is no such thing as culture in Islam, their is only religion and that's about it, rest is man made. It's only fair that Mr Fred also considered your feelings as you still care for him; it's a two way process.
Also, as already said above, please look into Islam as Alhamdullilah it's a wonderful religion. Masha Allah, their are a lot of non-Muslim coming into Islam by the grace of Allah (swt) because it makes sense and is a way of life. In fact their are more women converting than men (almost 7 out of 10), so you should look into it for yourself and your child too so that you can live a happy, fulfilled life leading to Jannah (paradise) in hereafter iA.
May Allah (swt) show you the right path and help you out of this situation to find a solution which in the best interst of your baby and you. Amin.
Muhammad1982,
Editor, IslamicAnswers.com
Thank you for your comment but I am still having a hard time understanding some things regarding pre-marital relationships. I posted a comment if you have any further thoughts about ,my new comment please share.
Janet
Janet,
Thanks for writing back and only reason you are having hard time understanding things such as premarital relationships (even if it is not of physical nature) is because you do not have knowledge of Islam, what is halal/haram and benefits of following them? I will post what Quran and Hadith [authentic sayings of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH)].
"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and to protect their private parts. That is purer for them. Verily Allah is All-Aware of what they do. And tell believing women to lower their gaze and protect their parts (Holy Quran - 24:30-31)
If you analyse the above ayah, it merely mentions about gaze. It should be telling what would be the punishment for engaging in full fledged haram relationship; the one that lead to getting a woman pregnant who he wasn't married to. Only union between a man and a woman is marriage, their is no such thing as girlfriend/boyfriend or any other casual relationship.
All this is mainly to protect the rights of women and children, which in turn are vital to keeping the family ties hence beneficial for the whole society as family is the unit of society.
Prophet (pbuh) said,
"Do not let a second look follow the first. The first look is allowed to you but not the second. " (Ahmad, Abu Dawood, at-Tirmidhi)
Their is nothing more tempting for men than women but Muslim men are bound by their faith to honor women by marrying them in one, twos, threes or fours (only if they can do justice between them) which will help them lower their gaze and fear Allah (swt).
Abu Hurairah (R.A) narrated that Prophet Muhammad (saw) said that;
"Among the seven person whom Allah will shade in HIS Shad of the Day (of judgement) when there is no shade except HIS Shade, is a man who is tempted by a beautiful woman and refuses to respond for fear of Allah." (Bukhari and Muslim).
My final thoughts are to read Quran thoroughly and follow what sister Najah has said in her last comment below. Do not convert for the sake of this man but only if it makes sense to you, and also claim child support as soon as possible regardless of what Fred or other people think/say. Your child deserves to know who is his father (not to mention that he is the one you should be thinking about the most as mother) and Fred needs to own up to his responsibility as he is the one who brought this child in this world; you weren't alone in all this.
May all this works out in the best interest of you and your child and may Allah (swt) put compassion, mercy in the heart of your Ex and give him knowledge and understanding to take the right step for sake of everyone involved. Amin.
Muhammad1982,
Editor, IslamicAnswers.com
Mashallah...such a good response. This times have alot of women in such situations. If Fred doesn't want to be in his kids's life, that is his own loss. I agree that he should have thought about the consequences of such a relationship before indulging, but he didnt. He should be part of raising his own child. Janet, ask for child support. Contact his family.
Dont let that sad experience make you unhappy, you have a beautiful baby boy who looks up to you and depends on you. May Allah grant you patience, peace and tranquility when dealing with this whole situation. It is going to shine after the clouds are gone. Look into Islam. It is a beautiful religion. I myself am a revert.
All will be well, Inshallah.
Thank you for your thoughts. I'm struggling to understand what influenced Fred's decision. I posted a comment, if you can give any more thoughts I would appreciate it.
Janet
Janet,
First of all, your baby is not haram. Your child is in no way responsible for yours or Fred's actions.
Fred was happy to lie with you in bed but when it came to you being with child well...that is a whole other story. If Fred has his way, no one is ever going to know about your son. He's not going to put his reputation on the line here, after all...it's all being dumped on you...why should he care?
What has happened here is a travesty of justice. Not for you or Fred but this child...your son. Has Fred ever bought diapers or milk for this child of his? Chances are he hasn't done a single thing.
If you are in the United States, I would advise you to seek help through Social Services in your city. You can get help through them and God willing someone can guide you forward to see what some options are for you. Fred is not dead. Fred is very much alive and pretending this whole situation is non existent. Fact of the matter is, you didn't have this baby on your own. Why should Fred be allowed to pretend this whole situation isn't any of his responsibility? Why should Fred be allowed to simply walk away as though he has had no hand in all of this?
Janet...your child is a year old. You have no idea how much it costs to raise a child. Why should this burden be placed solely on you? Fred needs to take some responsibility. Even if Fred doesn't want to be a father or be with you, he has a child and that is a fact. How fair is that to you or your son? It isn't.
You absolutely, most definitely without a doubt should file for child support. Again...it isn't about you or Fred at this point. It is about this child who has come into this world and his right to have the necessary things he will need as he grows. Doctors visits, dental, food, school supplies, illness, clothing and on and on...costs money. Fred does not need to be there to see his son grow up (sad for him) but at the very least, he could and should contribute financially to raise this boy.
Finally Janet, I know you say that you are not a spiritual person but I would like you to take a moment to look at this life of yours. You are now a mother of what I can only imagine to be a beautiful little boy. I invite you to pick up a copy of Abdullah Yusif Ali's translation of the Quran. It really helped me in the direction of my life many years ago and it is without a doubt, the best translation of the Holy Quran that I have ever come across. I wish you the best with your son. I hope that you will go forward and make Fred be a stand up guy and do what is right and that is to be liable for the child he helped bring into this world.
Salam
Thank you for correcting me about "Haram baby" and sharing your thoughts. I didn't understand the meaning of "Haram" until I recently looked up the definition. I am in Canada and I have the paper work to file for support but I'm still searching for more understanding before I proceed. I posted another comment, if you have any thoughts please share.
Janet
Thank you for responding to my post. Some of my questions have been answered but I still don't understand some things. Before I got pregnant Fred talked about me meeting his family, why would my pregnancy change his mind?? Would there be a reason he wouldn't want to tell his family?? What are the dynamics of a Muslim family??
Why would he ask me to choose between him or our child?? He was happy, is there a reason he would change his mind?? I've read other stories online of families making the father choose between the family and mother and child. Did he tell me to choose so he wouldn't have to??
I also have my reservations about approaching his family and filling for child support because I don't want to ruin the chance of my son of possibly having a relationship with them. I also don't want them to dislike me, I want to be able to have a good relationship with them for the sake of my son. I want to try and resolve this out of court if possible.
I had met some of his friends when we were together who are of the same faith, but they had no objections to our relationship and they also have engaged in pre-maritial relationships. If these relationships are not allowed why would a group of people engage in such relationships??
I feel that Fred didn't want things to be this way. One of the few times I spoke with him since I had our son he expressed sadness and said that wasn't okay and that he loved me. What would stop him from being apart of our lives if we would be happy together??
I have considered converting to Islam but I would only convert if it meant that my son could have his father in his life. If I converted to Islam would me and Fred be allowed to get married and be together?? I know it's obvious that Fred has made his choice but I'm curious if there's a possibility for us to be together. I have the idea of us being a family stuck in my head and I just want to know if this is even possible?
I know I'm being kind of irrational but I've had these thoughts in my head for a long time. I'm having a hard time letting go of my love for Fred. I had never been in a meaningful relationship like this before and I could see myself spending my life with him, and it's not everyday you can find someone to say that about.
I know that some of these questions can only be answered by Fred, but I'm trying to understand what influenced his decision.
Janet
Hello Janet,
I read your questions and it reminds me of myself at one point. Asking questions that deep inside, you know the answers to :(... First of all, I dont think that you getting pregnant changed Freds mind about you meeting his family, I honestly believe he NEVER had any intention on introducing them to you. Why? Because if he did he would have done things the islamic way, he would have NOT have sex with you and he would have talked to his family from the start. Sometimes men ( regardless of their religion) will say anything just to get what they want. Why did he ask you to choose? I think because he is a coward. It would have been so much better for him if you had an abortion, that would have "erase the mistake he made" (not saying your baby is a mistake, just saying that probably how he saw it) Out of sight, out of mind... I have heard soooo much people saying how a baby outside marriage is haram and this and that... He is not but that's probably how he saw it. I had a friend who was in your same situation, I kid you not. And he told her the baby was haram, and he felt bad about confronting Allah about that haram baby so he asked her to abort...
I hope Im not being to harsh with my comment... I dont mean to I just want you to open you eyes honey! If you dont want to file for child support, more credit for you. But I doubt that your son will have a relationship with his family, if he has not stepped up to the plate I dont think he wont, and chances are, his family does not even know this baby exists! Unfortunately, I know many muslim families who WILL reject the baby eventhough he did NOT ASK TO BE BORN!!!
To your question regarding other people engaiging into relationships without being married, that happens all the time. These are people who just want to have fun and live haram lives, but it's alway hiden from their families! In their families eyes they are the best. They have their fun, and when they are ready to get married they will turn to a " good muslima"... This bothers me because if anything they should keep in mind that yes... maybe mom and dad cant see you but ALLAH SEES EVERYTHING! They hide from their families but dont realize that no matter where they go ALLAH can see it all.
If you want to convert to Islam do it for YOU! Dont do it because you think this might fix everything and Fred will ask you to marry him and live a happy life. That will not happen. He knows he planted a seed in this world and has not man up, you converting will not change that. Continue learing about Islam and Inshallah Allah will guide you through the straight path. Hopefully you will find everything in Islam and be able to teach your son the real Islam and how to be a true muslim and a great man!! I will pray for you and your baby! I hope this helps and please dont take my comment in a bad way, I just feel very close to your situation since I have experienced it one way or another.
Amira
You're not being harsh at all, thank you for your honesty. This clarify's things for me and will help me make some decisions in my life. Thank you for taking the time to respond I really appreciate it. And thank you for your prayers.
Janet
You are very welcome! I hope the best for you two!! Easier said than done but try to move on. Like I said before, stay busy and dont let this man think you will die without him. Move on, and be happy!! Something that helps me a lot in times in which I dont know what to do or why something is happening to me is I say to myself : " Allah knows best!" and it always makes me feel better. Because I know that at the moment I feel like i know what is best for me but at the end of the day nobody knows it best like Allah. So if this is happening to you, try to look at the positive side, you have a wonderful baby, and you are learing about Islam...dont focus on what you lost or you dont have, focus on what you do have and what you can offer your baby. You dont know what the future holds, but if Allah feels this is the best thing that could happen to you and your baby, then it is. You will see it in the longrun. Wish you the best!! 🙂
AMIRA
Janet,
It's possible Fred may have considered you meeting his family however, once you became with child...his family would know he was having premarital sex. Premarital sex is a sin whether it is a man or a woman in Islam. He would have had to admit this to his parents that he was sexually active and right there, there would have been problems for him. Or...maybe he never had sincere intentions to introduce you and it was all just talk of you meeting his parents. Maybe he told you what he thought you wanted to hear. God knows what was going on in his head.
He asked you to choose between him and his child because he thought you would abort the child, an easy way out for him. That way, no one would ever know or be a witness to what is now a product of your relationship together no matter how brief a time it was. Yes, he probably was happy until reality set in and he knew how his family would react. Many Muslim parents have plans for their children and some even have a woman chosen whom they feel will make a good spouse for their child. Maybe he was worried about how crushed his parents would be once they knew what he was up to, not to mention that you were with child. I honestly think Fred asked you to choose between him and the child because he was hoping that you would choose him over the life that was within you.
It is so hard to gauge how someones family will react to news of this nature. As parents, we are all so different and cultural backgrounds play a huge roll. I know personally that if one of my son's were to father (Allah forbid) a child out of wedlock, that I would not turn my back if I knew without a doubt that my son was that child's father. I would want my son to do the right thing and make certain that the child was provided for financially no matter what. The child is of paramount importance and no blame ever should be placed on them...ever.
My personal opinion on the matter of you having any relationship with Fred's family is, slim to none. You say yourself that Fred stopped having anything to do with you prior to you having your child. He even hung up the phone when you would call him. Doesn't that make you angry? Here you are, pregnant with HIS child and he has the audacity to stop all contact with you and hang up the phone in your face! I said it before and I'll say it again, you did not make this child all by yourself. There is an old saying, "If you want to play, you have to pay." In this case, Fred wanted to play so...now he has to pay. When I say, "pay", I am not talking strictly about money here...I am talking about making it known that he is the father of this child. His family should know he is the father of this boy or at the very least...a sperm donor. A father is there for their child and is caring and nurturing...Fred is not a father and never has been. However, he must be held accountable Janet...your son deserves that. You can tell the court what has transpired and how very much you would like this child's father and his family involved if they would like to be. If Fred chooses to not be involved with this child, that is his choice however...he should have absolutely no choice in making sure that this child has what he needs.
If and when you file for child support, Fred will need to come to court. He will most likely deny the child as his (or...maybe he won't). DNA testing can be done to confirm that he is the father and the courts will decide what will happen next. Don't fear ruining or losing anything at this point Janet. You have nothing from Fred to indicate he will ever want to be involved with you or your son. Your son is nearing one year of age and Fred is off pretending as if nothing has ever happened. How messed up is that?! He has never even seen his son!
You cannot work anything out of court on this Janet. For the sake of your son...it needs to be documented in a court of law. Fred could say, "yeah...I'll pay you bla, bla each month. Guess what? What if you don't see a dime...ever? He can just deny his son because there is absolutely nothing that even shows he is in fact the father.
Janet, these premarital relationships you speak of with Fred's friends are haram. These friends of Fred are living a lifestyle which goes against the very teachings of Islam. They themselves may have had no objections to your relationship however, their parents would not agree with any of them. They are all talking crap and they know it. They all hide from their parents of what they do, just like good old Fred. They may hide their premarital relationships from their parents but Allah see and knows all.
Fred as I said is most likely afraid of his family finding out about you and his child. If he really is sad and he loves you, maybe he should step up and be a man and take responsibility and tell his parents what has happened. That would be as good as any a place to start but until he does step up and do something, your situation does not change.
Janet, you do not need to be a Muslim in order for Fred to marry you. Islam allows a Muslim man to marry a Christian or a Jew. However, for the sake of the children...it is best for Fred to be with a Muslim woman as she is the one who will raise the children Muslim. In the case of a Muslim man marrying a woman not of the Islamic faith, the children must be raised Muslim. She is the one who will teach the children about their faith and will raise them accordingly. Janet, I know that you are hurt and alone and have been left to raise this child on your own but why would you want to accept any faith just to be with someone? If Fred worshiped the devil and all of hell, would you want to be with him because you love him? Would you bow to Satan if it meant that Fred would be with you? You cannot even consider converting to Islam simply to be with Fred. Faith is something that comes from within us Janet, you can't accept a faith blindly because you want something...it doesn't work that way. However, I totes encourage you to get a copy of the Quran translated by Abdullah Yusif Ali. It is a translation of the Quran from it's original Arabic into the English language. It is very beautiful and eloquently written. The translation is excellent and God willing you will be able to learn about Islam. I also encourage you to find an Islamic center in the community where you live and maybe individuals at the center can help guide you and you can see for yourself if Islam is for you. Islam is not just a faith, it is a way of life.
I think it is really sad how Fred has dumped all of this on you but I think the fact that you haven't even heard from him in nearly a year is enough to tell you that nothing is likely to happen. I know it's not what you want to hear but it's obvious from everything you have told us. Fred's decisions were influenced by his upbringing and the fear of hurting his family.
Janet, I really do hope you seek child support for your son. Child support is not about seeking revenge or hurting Fred, in any way...it is about looking out for your sons future. Your child is very young now and may not need much but as he grows, so will his needs. Why should he be deprived from having the things he needs because Fred is irresponsible and running from his responsibility? Why should you have to shoulder this all alone? Quit trying to be nice and thinking about Fred...he is not thinking about you or this boy of his. Who knows...maybe if you do step up and file for child support, he will have to face you whether he wants to or not and maybe something good can come of it.
Wishing you only good things for you and your son...Salam
Really wise words sister Najah as always, May Allah (swt) reward you for your efforts and time you spare to help people. Amin.
Muhammad1982,
Editor, IslamicAnswers.com
Thank you brother for your kind words. I hope I am able to help this sister in any small way I can. May Allah bless brother Wael for creating this most wonderful and helpful website for Muslims and non Muslims alike. The wealth of information found here is helpful to so many.
Jazak Allah Khair
I agree with sister Najah 100%. Such wise advise.
You:- should seek child support from this Fred guy.
- should only convert to islam because it is the true path and not as a fix to problems with Fred.
- should embrace raising your child in a happy and safe home with or without Fred.
-try as hard as you can to get the picture of Fred in your lives out of your head. Yes it is ideal but in reality, Fred left when you needed him most,in welcoming a newborn in this world. How sure are you that he is going to be there during the downs of your life? Allah knows best.
-know that you are strong enough to hold it down without Fred. You have a child to live for and take care of. Let this child be your motivation, strength and source of joy. You will make it.
Janet, Fred has not contacted you in one year, and he knows about the kid. A case of a man running from his problems. A man should rise up to the task and take care of his son. Chances are that he is really afraid of his family's reaction towards this situation or he is just plain nasty, insensitive and does not care about you or the child. He does not care if the child is fed or clothed. If he did he would do something........like be there and show that he cares. He is not man enough to deal, to stand up for you and your child.
File for child support so he can at least take responsibility for his child.
The longer you hold on to him, the more your pain is going to rub onto your child, he sees and feels it, young as he is.
Take a brave and bold step, snap out of it. Get over Fred, move on and be happy. You will be blessed and shall find abudance from places you would never have thought of. You will find happiness. Dont let him hold you back because he is acting like none of it happened. Sad but its happenning.
The English transaltion of the Quran mentioned by Najah is really good. Find a copy and read it. Remember that Fred's actions are very unislamic so dont have anything against islam.:)
All will be well.
Salams
@Najah- please do not recommend the translation of the Quran by Yusuf Ali. It has mistake.
You can get a copy of the translation of the quran by Muhsin Khan or Saheeh International.
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@Janet - I am really curious to know what is going on in your life right now. If you are facing any problems lets us know sister.
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May Allah grant us success! May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet, his family and Companions!
Brother,
Can you please enlighten me as to what mistake you are referring to within the translation so that I might research it?
Salam
Like for this verse
Quran [15:16] , Yusuf Ali's translation says..
It is We Who have set out the zodiacal signs in the heavens, and made them fair-seeming to (all) beholders;
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May Allah grant us success! May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet, his family and Companions!
@Najah - Walaikumassalam Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuhu
Wa'alaykumsalam,
Regarding Quran 15:16,
It is We Who have set out the zodiacal signs in the heavens, and made them fair-seeming to (all) beholders;
According to wiki,
Therefore, from the above definition we see that the word 'zodiacal sign' has the same meaning when compared to other translators who used the words 'great stars' or 'mansion of stars'.
And We have placed within the heaven great stars and have beautified it for the observers.- Sahih International
And verily in the heaven we have set mansions of the stars, and We have beautified it for beholders.- Pitckhall
I do agree that in the original script of Yusuf Ali's translation, there was some mistranslations but he corrected it and Saudi Arabia along with sheikh Abd Al Aziz Ibn Baz hold the view that Yusuf Ali's translation was the best available world wide at that time and before publishing they did revised it and it has been revised maybe 3 times now also by saudi scholars. Even if Yusuf Ali used a completely different word or sentence in his works, the meaning will be the same for all.
@علي بن عبد الله آل الشيخ - why get confused in first place ?
@Najah - check The translation of Quran by Muhsin Khan. See how good it is . alhamdulillah.
Brother,
I did check out the translation from Muhsin Khan and 15:16 and it is as follows:
Indeed, We have put the big stars in the heaven and We beautified it for the beholders.
Yusuf Ali's translation says:
It is We Who have set out the zodiacal signs in the heavens, and made them fair-seeming to (all) beholders;
As someone looking at this verse in it's translated form, I do not see a mistake. What I see is two scholars who interpreted this verse to the best of their ability and translated it from Arabic to the English language.
There are several other translations which I found from various scholars and although they are not identical, they all relatively provide the same view. Allah hu Alem.
Salam
@Najah -
walaikumassalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuhu
Tell me.. is it permitted in Islam to believe in Zodiac signs ?
Brother,
I am a mere woman...mother of six...baker of amazing chocolate chip cookies and one very cool mom. I believe you misinterpret Yusif Ali's translation of the word "Zodiacal". I perceive Yusif Ali's translation using the word "Zodiacal" not in a literal sense of whether are you a Libra or a Gemini but as a way to demonstrate the constellations within the heavens.
I found this informative Islamic web page that maybe explains things that I do not have the knowledge to.
http://islamic-dictionary.tumblr.com/post/4396864700/buruj-arabic-the-zodiacal
Yusif Ali spent his entire life translating the Holy Quran and for me personally, his work was exemplary. In a translation of any works, there are always bound to be differences in how one perceives and understands the meanings of the written words. I don't think in this case it can be seen as a mistake but an interpretation if you will. Allah hu alem.
Salam
Walaikumassalam Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuhu.
I told you what I got to know.
Rest is left to you.
Any non muslim reading something like "zodiacal" I wonder what comes to his/her mind. Think about it.
I request to you check at least once translation of Muhsin Khan. See how it is.
goto Quran.com
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May Allah grant us success! May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet, his family and Companions!
"a mere woman...mother of six...baker of amazing chocolate chip cookies and one very cool mom."
🙂
Yusuf Ali's translation is not perfect and is perhaps outdated now. The flowery old-fasioned language with the "thees and thous" impedes understanding, in my opinion. But he was certainly not a mushrik. No doubt he meant the word "Zodiacal" to refer to the constellations. There was no implication of worship of the stars or believing in astrology.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
I just want to get one thing clear, there is no such thing as a "haram baby" in Islam. Yes premarital sex is a sin in Islam but the baby does not get the sin transferred from his/her parents. There is no such thing as "original sin" in our religion. The baby is pure and innocent and has done nothing wrong. Your son's life is fresh and new.
Fred has done you wrong by doing this to you but this is not because of his religion. There are many men like Fred out there from various cultures and religions. In fact what Fred has done goes against our religion. As difficult and upsetting this may sound I am afraid that there is a good chance that Fred will not come back again. The best thing for you to do is to move on and focus on your son. If you feel that you shouldn't have to take all the responsibility maybe you can look for someone to marry so they can help you financially as well as help you get over Fred. Moving on would be better for you than to keep thinking if he will ever come back. Even if he did come back would you want someone who has abandoned you and his child? How will you know for sure he won't abandon you again, maybe this time your child will be old enough to understand? Your child needs a positive role model in his life and his father unfortunately doesn't seem to be the right one for him.
Also know that you are not alone and that I have seen many women with the same problem you have but they are okay now. They have moved on and took care of their children whether by themselves or with their significant other. God always has a way for us to take care of our kids even when things look difficult. I suggest you look into Islam and know more about it. It can give you the closure you are looking for. It will make you see how wonderful the religion and how exceptional the men are supposed to be and will realize that Fred wasn't so good after all. This will help you heal and you can get closer to your Creator.
-Starclusters
i do agree with u... i am pregnant for almost 4 weeks now with a muslim arab man, before he came here he said he wanted to have a baby but i should not do any bad things any more, vices drinking smoking....
after he came back to his country and after a week, i said i am pregnant and he is happy but i know he is thinking of something, something worrying him.. and then we almost fight for a week, but then he said if we wanted to continue our relationship, then i said ok, then we fight again and he said he will leave me but support the baby, but then we calm down and told me that if i rily luv him i must be a muslim and learn how to be a muslim woman because its better for me and the baby, not only for him. i am thinking its right because we always fight each other because of our different beliefs and also he is thinking that maybe i will be back on the wrong things that i am doing.
so the lesson for that is, if the guy really loves u, he will find a way to be with u even if its about religion, distance or race.