Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I have broken promises to Allah many times

mercy forgiveness repentance tawbah

"In the name of Allah, the most Merciful and the most Beneficial."

I do not want to mention my sins. I am a boy of almost 18. Almost one year ago, I had promised Allah Almighty that I will never sin again if He gave me one thing. And if I broke my promise, He could take away His "namat." By the grace of Almighty Allah, I had my thing, yet there was no way to reach to my destination.

The problem is that I have done sin when I was alone in my home. And In that way I broke my promise with Allah. I promised again not to sin but I broke my promise again. This happened almost three times. Now, I think I lost my "Iman." I rush towards Allah for forgiveness but there is no reply from Allah. I think there is no reason for my living. In namaz, I have no feelings of standing before Almighty Allah. When I recite Quran, there is no feelings of having Iman.

I spend most of my time in loneliness, as I don't like others in my life. This attitude is in me since my childhood. Due to loneliness, I have a very strong imagination. I don't know but I think this is only my imagination that every time Allah is talking to me. I ask question, And the answer come, even now. Even sometime I think that I am talking to Hazrat Mohammad (PBUH). I know that sounds crazy but that is the truth. And this is happening in my mind for about 3 years.

Sometime I think this is my psychological problem. I don't talk to Allah and His Prophet(PBUH) in reality, this is happening in my imagination only. Now, I imagine that I am completely lost, Allah will not forgive me, And takes away the things He had given to me. When I say the word 'Allah' I feel completely lost. I don't know why but there is no answer as it should be. Also I have read in Quran that Allah does not like those who break promises with him. As I broke the promise, I think Allah is not going to like me anymore.
Now I have following questions in my mind:

1) Will Allah and Hazrat Mohammad (PBUH) forgive me, although I broke my promise to Allah many times?

2) Is it right, or do I have some psychological problem that Allah and Hazrat Mohammad (PBUH) talk to me? (As I have said, I spent most of my time in loneliness and loneliness is the kind of thing that I like most.)

3) I am afraid  that Allah will take away His things that He has given me for the promise. Is there any way to please Allah Almighty so that He will not take away His things from me?

And there are many difficulties in my life that I have to fight alone. (I am not displeasing Allah, just telling.) I like difficulties in my life, but the problem is I feel completely lost whenever there is difficulty. I think I have lost faith and Iman. I just want to return to my normal life. I offer my prayer five time a day but there are no answers. I cannot fast due to some reasons. Please help me.

-Umer16

Advertisements

Tagged as: , , , , , ,

29 Responses »

  1. Assalamolaikum Brother,
    I can somehow see your feeling of regret,and I know how if feels, I know what happens when you are disobedient to Allah, I know brother I know. Allah has mentioned it very clearly, that every human is prone to evil, everyone commits sins and mistakes, and I mean it, EVERYONE brother, EVERYONE. The first person on earth, Hazrat Adam TOO transgressed against his soul and when he asked Allah to pardon him, He was forgiven. Can you believe it? A prophet and the first Man on earth was too the first one to commit a sin. Yes it's good you did not mention your sin because we are all asked to conceal our sins,not to tell anyone about it. Brother no matter how small or grave a sin is,it is a sin,and Sinning means to be disobedient to Allah and being disobedient to Allah is a grave sin,so eventually every sin is grave.
    But you know what? You must have heard of "Even the highest mountain has a way out" . And yes it is true. Likewise, the sign of being a believer is that he feels as if his a sin is like a big mountain which would not take long to fall on him and crush him,IF he does not do something to make his way out. And that way is Repentance, the door of Tawbah, Which is the biggest door ever made !!! You need not to think of Hazrat Muhammad's (saw) Forgiveness, because only Allah is worthy of worship and worthy of asking forgiveness from. Only Allah forgives sins,No one else. In Quran it says "Muhammad is only a Messenger of Allah, there have been Messengers before him. What then, will you turn back from Islam if he dies or is killed?'
    This clearly shows that He was only a Human being,a special Human being,who was sent to convey Allah's message, and He himself said that only ask Allah,not Him (Muhammad (saw))

    So the answer of your first question is, YES. Allah's mercy encompasses everything. Don't doubt his strength,He can and will forgive you,why won't he? We are the Ummah of His beloved Prophet !! He will,as he has promised to ! Just have a look on this powerful Verse in surah Zumar.

    Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah . Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful."

    Allah is the best of those who fulfill promises,don't you doubt that He won't forgive you,He will InshAllah.

    Your second question,that is not true my bro, its neither a Psychological problem nor is it true that He answers you, you say you spend all you're time alone,That is the reason. That is you're thinking. It is only your imagination,I'm a Psychologist and get many cases like that, spending majority of your time alone leads one to talk to themselves and get answers which is normal,but you have to stop being alone,it is not healthy! You need to be socially active and relaxed,make your life easier rather than staying alone !!!
    Your third question,what do you mean by things? Don't you think if Allah is pleased with you, you'll have everything? Why don't you put this one thing in your mind, this world is temporary, Jannah is our aim, all you have to do is repent my bro repent,. Tawbah has the significance that no other thing has,it wipes out the previous sins and brings blessings in one's life,repentance wipes the slate clean,you repent and you're born again my bro! So gain knowledge and find ways to get closer to Allah through Salah, dua, tawbah aand dhikr. I'm sure you'll find relief. Inshallah.
    Your sister
    Aisha

  2. Brother i have a few peices of advice for y ou inshallah that are concrete:

    -I assume you are inshallah praying jumma in the mosque

    -try your best to pray the five daily prayers in the masjid, if not possible then fajr and isha for sure. This is *very* important. This is not optional.

    -make your morning and evening azkar. You can go to makedua.com and look them up inshallah. Make this a habit that you do Not leave under ANY circumstances. Inshallah in time you will memorize them.

    -read surah baqarah within every 3 days. And do the duas before sleeping especially ayah kursi, and blowing surah ikhlas, falaq and nas in your palms and them putting them all over your body.

    -make istighfar as much as you can all the time and move on and do not give in to the waswas of shaitan. Inshallah watch nouman ali khan videos on youtube or go to bayyinah.tv for more.

  3. Assalamualaikum,

    Brother Umar, you have been given good advise by Allah's Servant, above and I share the same words, even about the forgiveness of Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam. It Is Only Allah, Who Is Worthy of Worship and He Is The Oft Forgiving and Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam is His Messenger. You should follow in his footsteps - Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam.

    Additionally, your name is Umar. You know who Umar was? Shaitan changed his way, when he saw Umar coming. Shaitaan was afraid of his name. He was a brave man who fought against the wrong, all his life after he became a Muslim.

    Allah's Messenger Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said:

    "O Ibn Al-Khattab! By Him in Whose Hands my life is! Never does Satan find you going on a way, but he takes another way other than yours." (Bukhari)

    When a person has to overcome a problem such as yours, one has to fight it and be aggressive towards it. Concerning your sin, you should know that it is a disease you have to cure. Will you not take medicine (and abstain from what affects your health) to cure a worldy disease? You will fight it and make sure you come out clean.

    This is the same case here. You need to cure the disease with determination and bravery like the bravery of Umar Radiyallahu Anhu. Whenever Shaitaan whispers in your heart to commit the sin, slap him and say Astaghfirullah, then turn to Allah.

    Seclusion is good, as long as you make good use of it and remember Allah and shed some tears remembering the Aakhirah and the Qabr.

    Also, visit the graveyard occasionally to remember the Aakhirah and to realize that that will be your home one day, which could even be today or tomorrow. This will help you remain on the path of Allah, in sha Allah.

    In sha Allah, you will overcome the disease (your addiction to the sin) by facing it with bravery and fighting against your enemy - shaitan. Indeed, Shaitan is very weak, though highly experienced. Allah Says:

    4:76
    إِنَّ كَيْدَ الشَّيْطَانِ كَانَ ضَعِيفًا
    Indeed, the plot of Satan has ever been weak.

    I pray that you win this battle against yourself and the Shaitan. Aameen.

    Abu Abdul Bari
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  4. Dear brother Umer, how can you for one minute think that you could live without committing a sin. No one living in this world is sinless. even the mullahs or muftis or Zakir Naik are not sinless. Some men from our generation will probably be sinless on the Day of Reckoning but this will not be because they were sinless in this world but because they repent so sincerely to Allah that their sins will be erased before they die.

    You made a promise that is impossible to keep so dont lose faith because you couldnt keep it. There are a lot of verses in the Quran about promises and you probably know of the importance that Allah places on promises that people make with Him. However there is also a verse (I hope someone will remember and write down the verse for me) which emphasizes the need for the promise to be one which is good and can be kept. Why do you think Allah will take you to account for a promise you cant keep? I remember when I was around 15, I made a promise to Allah and broke it. It was a far easier and doable promise but I didnt keep it. I am almost 19 now and this memory still haunts me but, if I can expect forgiveness even with my really insincere repentance for a sin of such magnitude, you can bet you will be forgiven for breaking your 'non-existent' promise.

  5. Salam. But don't you think he should pay kuffara for the promises broken? I mean I dont have any idea but what about the broken promises with Allah swt?

  6. I'm writing this because I made a similar mistake like you. I broke an oath that I made to Allah. I am going through same phase of terrible guilt. I stood by my oath for almost an year, but today, I jjust broke it. I went through extensive reading of the Quran to learn about repentance. This is what I've discovered and want to share with you.

    Allah does not impose blame upon you for what is unintentional in your oaths, but He imposes blame upon you for what your hearts have earned. And Allah is Forgiving and Forbearing. (2:225)

    Allah will not impose blame upon you for what is meaningless in your oaths, but He will impose blame upon you for [breaking] what you intended of oaths. So its expiation is the feeding of ten needy people from the average of that which you feed your [own] families or clothing them or the freeing of a slave. But whoever cannot find [or afford it] - then a fast of three days [is required]. That is the expiation for oaths when you have sworn. But guard your oaths. Thus does Allah make clear to you His verses that you may be grateful.(5:89)

    Hope , this will help you and other who have broken oaths and help them get their Iman back.

  7. I have same problem....and sure allah will forgive

  8. few days ago i ve taken the oath on the name of ALLAH. But now it is really difficult for me to stay on that oath and i want to break that oath n i m also not able to pay kaffarah.
    so please any one guide me that what can i do?
    i m crying infront of ALLAH n praying him to forgive me bt my soul is not relaxed.
    Please anyone can tell me the solution i will be really thankful...
    waiting for response.

    • Assalaamualaikam

      There have been several posts discussing this issue - if you search our archives, you should inshaAllah be able to find them. If you need additional advice, please submit your question as a new post for publication - that way it can be published and answered in turn, inshaAllah.

      Remember that Allah is Most Merciful.

      Midnightmoon
      IslamicAnswers.com editor

  9. Thank u.. And its in shaa Allah, not inshallah .

  10. I am facing the same problem I am only 15 and don't know whether to fast for 3 days or not

  11. Assalam-o-alaikum, I am 11 years old girl. And i made so many promises to Allah and broke them, will he forgive me please tell me.

    • Don't worry sister, Allah will continue to forgive you as long as you make tawbah sincerely. There is no need to make any promises to Allah. Promises are just words. What counts are our deeds. Rather than making promises, just try your best to be a good person and a good Muslim.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  12. hello , sir
    i broke my promise with allah that i will not do anything(which i had taken promise ) so i have to do kaffarah .can i fast for three days

  13. All brothers and sisters plz write name of Allah And Prophet Muhammad(SAWW) in capital letters.1

    • I feel so guilty. I made a promise to Allah and accidentally broke it. It is not only that but I hope Allah can forgive me. I try to become better muslim I pray, I fast and sometimes read Quran it is not only that but I may have broke a promise once. In Shaa Allah I be forgiven and become better Muslim keeping my promises as a kid I am

      • I'm 18 years old girl and I'm virgin one of my friend told me about masturbation l wasn't knowing what it is masturbation so while my friend told me about this l got interested in masturbation and than l want to do and l was knew that it is haram in Islam to touch own body than l searched on google it is haram but l really wanted to do so l Wont can't control myself l did masturbation than l got regret and feel so afraid or l got anixety and l felt so ashamed and bad than l made a promise to Allah that l won't do again so after a couple of long months later l read about masturbation than l got horny and wanted to do so l did again masturbation and broke the promise so l again felt the same regret and I got anixey but while I was said sorry to Allah than l felt peace in my heart but after a long time passed l did again and broke the promise and i was read about masturbation in Islam after read that l made promise again to Allah l never do masturbation again if l did than you harm me l was very confident to say that l won't do but again l broke the promise and believe me guys after did masturbation l wasn't feel good and my health wasn't okay l was felt was dizzy l felt weak and shortness of breath and fast heart beat then l was scared and l was knew that it is happened because of my words so l wasn't want to die so on that time l asked Allah to forgive me and do not harm me just give me one chance but do not harm me so after that l felt good about my health and then l thanked to Allah and l was said to Allah that I keep away those things that makes me want to do and snice that day l realise never make promises in rush with Allah and with everyone and still im scared and l learnt a lesson that Allah listen us Allah always listen our words and Allah always present and so always think before speak l have learnt a lesson and now Im trying to do than promise and l made it Alhamdulillah

  14. Aslamualaikum
    This helped me alot. I had done the same thing and was very much worried. I didnot know what to do next. But this gave me some patoence. Thanks alot for this
    JizakAllah

  15. Dear Brother

    As-salāmu ʿalaykum

    If you want to Allah forgive you no matter how much your sin is big ..Say Allah to forgive u and do not do this thing Again...

    ( Easy Solution )

    this happens with me also ... but i love Allah so much from my childhood always i remember Allah so much... no one trust u no one love u no one forgive u but Allah...

    1. Remember Allah when u Alone
    2, Allah see everything and know what is in your heart...

    ------------------------------------
    Clean your inner heart simply forget your past and thing about future ....and Judgement day

    This life is test if u want to win you need to work hard as much you can.....

    (and Allah helps those who help themselves )

    listen quran with translate

    Shitan never let u win ...... if you want to win in judgement day you need to work hard

  16. assallamwalaikum brother

    May Allah have mercy on you brother and forgive you for what you have done. My brother there are 3 things you can do if you break a promise
    1) you have feed 10 people the same amount you eat
    2) you have to cloth 10 people with proper clothing in which thye can read namaz
    3) you have to free a slave

    If you cant do any of these 3 things than you can fast for 3 days

    May Allah succeed you in doing this.

Leave a Response