Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Please suggest what shall I do, my son and I can’t live separate from my husband?

Husband is going astray

I want to bring my husband back

assalaiakum.
my name is maserat. I have a very hard life living separate since 5yr. my son is 7 now. we are living very sad without my husband. Since 5 yrs i every day pray with ALLAH and ask for help and support but we failed . I tried every possibility but still failed. Please suggest what i do. how me and my son can be happy again. i read every Surat in Qur'an. and i am keep reading. but still we are living our miserable life.

Masarat.

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5 Responses »

  1. Sister it will be very hard to advice if you don't tell the reason, why you both are separated?

  2. Wa'alaykumsalam Maserat,

    Sorry about your situation. It really saddened me to hear of how a husband can abandon his family. May Allah have mercy on you.

    It has been 5 yrs since you last saw your husband ? Are you incontact with him by phone ? Where did he go ? What is the problem for the seperation ?

    There's not much you can do, maybe talk to his family about your situation. If nothing happens, then you have every right to seek divorce. Your husband can't just keep you waiting. Is he financing you and your son ? Is he nice to you ? I mean, if you really can't wait anymore and unhappy, then I believe divorce might solve the problem and Insha'Allah you'll find a great pious husband. Or if you wish, have patience and wait till your husband comes back. But How long will it take ? What if, its for another 5 yrs ?
    The rule is, a husband must not be away from his wife for 4 months, in your case its 5years. Sister, don't waste the precious life you've been blessed with. Don't remain unhappy along with your son. Your son might get affected by your unhapiness. Do something quick. Your situation most probably isn't a test from Allah. You have to just do what is allowed in Islam and use your knowledge. In your case, I believe that khula is best.
    Pray salat al isthikhara.

  3. Assalamualaikum,

    Sister, were you separated due to a dispute between yourselves? If so, then perhaps you should try and sort it out. Perhaps even he is saddened for not having to see his son? Has he married another woman after he left you?

    I suggest that you talk to him and request that things be sorted and you begin to stay together because you love him. If there is any misunderstanding, try to clarify it. Speak to his parents if required and influence them to convince him.

    Kids can do what we grown-ups can't. Have your son meet him or talk to him and make him feel that he needs to stay with you. Send your son to his parents place to spend time with his grand parents. In sha Allah it will help.

    My sister, difficulties are a part of life. They come in different forms, but you need to act in order to get over it and find peace.

    Trust in Allah and take steps to sort your problems, in sha Allah, you will find success.

    Muhammad Waseem
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  4. Sister, sorry to hear this. After 5 years I wonder where he his, and how you both have changed and what has happened in that time.
    I'd advise to maybe seek out a better father for your child, and better husband for you. After 5 years of separation and the tone of being deserted in your writing, it sounds like he's long gone. If I'm wrong, then you can try to get him back, but only you know how to do that.

    Good Luck

  5. Dear sis
    You already tried everyway for 5 years then just try more. Everything has an end even life.
    Cut it little day by day, one day it will be finished.
    Goodluck

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