Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Practicing Islam secretly, parents caught me offering prayers

Muslim prayer rug or musalla


Editor's note: the author is an 18 year old girl with Hindu parents. She is converted to Islam and practicing Islam secretly. Previous posts by this author:

I am following Islam in secret and my parents are strongly against Islam

Making up for the missed fasts of Ramadan



As usual, I struggled daily to offer the 5 prayers in secrecy. I was caught a few times by my parents before but I sneaked away with petty lies. However, my mother came to know the truth but I didn't care much.

I was sick of doing this in secrecy. I wanted my parents to accept the truth.

I still kept praying with rush (I know it's wrong) during openings, for example, mom in the bathroom and dad watching TV/PC. But it's thanks to Allah subhana wa taalaa, my score in my exams improved recently. Now as of late, I ask Him everyday to open my parents' hearts to Islam. Soon, I was beginning to lose patience. I googled why He isn't answering my duas instantly, and I read the reasons. After that, I felt abandoned and hopeless because I disobeyed Him against my own will as I could not wear the hijab during prayer. Anyway, all the prayers I've offered uptil now were invalid (since I didn't cover my head), so how can I expect Him to fulfill my duas? I lost confidence and felt upset.

This Saturday, I was fed up and disgusted with my parents. I thought,"I'm sick of doing this in secret. It's not like I want to get caught." Then at night, I was offering the Isha prayer in the kitchen to avoid getting caught. However, as I was offering my last rikaat, I could not resist the urge to turn around. And then I saw my mother standing behind me. She said, "continue, continue..." and I, who could not control the heavy shock, ran into the bathroom and cried. After that, I prayed with rush again.

I know I shouldn't be embarrassed of Islam, but my fears came true. My mother reported this to my father, and now both of them ignore me. They don't talk to me much. Their anti-Islamic behaviour makes me hate them more and more. In addition, my mother badmouths my friend just because she was responsible for my conversion. But in fact, it was another friend who influenced me to Islam. Not only my friend, but she says this many times, "Muslims are b****es" (Astagfirullah). This shocked me more.

What angers me more and makes me want to slap her so tight is her other saying, "It was a regrettable choice to send you to a Muslim school." How can she have the right to say that? I'd be straying around in the twisted paths instead now otherwise. Really, they've crossed the line and I have raging urges to insult and beat them up now.

I'm beginning to lose hope now.

I have my final exams coming up in March, and I want them to accept Islam before that. I want to show them that I will get 100% Insha Allah because of Allah subhana wa taalaa and His mercy on me and they should convert too.

Will their eyes be opened before my exams?

Plus, I'm in need of a new name. I want to be called "extremely amazing/awesome, lucky, blessed, kind, strong, clever and genius/highly intelligent/brilliant/excellent gift." Insha Allah.


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25 Responses »

  1. Dearest Hydden

    You should not hide your practice of Islam, your parents are aware of it now, so practice openly - why do you fear? They've already taken their stance, now you must take yours. Practice Islam openly so that they may see its beauty within your behaviour and practice.

    Do not be harsh with them --- that is not our way as muslims. You must continue to address your parents with utmost respect. Your respectful and dignified behaviour and persistent patience with them will be what leaves a lasting impression and a true reflection of Islam itself.

    Remember that Islam was not spread by force but the beauty of the example set by the early muslims, these observations in their honesty in their dealings, their kind and merciful treatment of others and the sheer beauty of their characters were what drew non-muslims to enquire about the Deen and then enter into it.

    Also, remember that you can only talk to your parents and set as best an example for them but you cannot force them to accept and convert to Islam. That must be their own choice. Let that not be what grieves you my dear, focus on learning as much about the Deen as you can and perfect your own practice and continue to make Dua that the Almighty may bless your parents with guidance but in the meantime, treat them with kindness, patience and respect even though they may try to provoke, do not give in to that.
    This is going to be a long road for you and them, do not expect quick fixes, have patience and persevere, this may be a test for you from the Almighty.

    Focus on your studies, study hard and make all the necessary effort, then leave the rest to the Almighty and Insha-Allah, you will do wonderfully. All the best and as for a name, perhaps look into the heroes of islam and pick a namesake that inspires you:)

  2. Sister it is lovely to know that you feel so passionate about embracing islam. May allah (swt) guide you to the right path, and keep you strong to fight any difficulties that come across your path.

    I'm a muslim and when I read namaaz I feel peaceful. That feeling is amazing, and you only get that when you pray. I do pray that you too one day can openly pray without any fear.

    There's two things I want to say, from reading your post.

    Firstly your parents. In islam parents are very very important. I urge you to look on the internet or get some islamic books and read the value of parents, especially our mothers. The doors of heaven are dependent on how respectful and how well we treated our parents.

    There is a story I read which I can't remember very well. I'm hoping someone on this website may be able to help give more details. It was in our prophets time and it was a situation of a individual who's mother wasn't a muslim. Our prophet muhammed (pbuh) advised that individual to still show respect and love to his mother even though she wasn't a muslim.

    Now in your post it seems like you have turned against your parents. Sister respect them and show them love and peace.

    Its tough especially when they are ignoring you, but remember your their child. How long can parents ignore their children for?

    Of course your parents will be angry, upset and will say very bad stuff about islam. But sister its a huge step you have taken in life. you need to stay strong and try to show them the beauty of islam. Guide them to the right path too. It won't be easy but the reward at the end will definitely be rewarding.

    Now secondly you mentioned how you got upset when your duas didn't get answered. Sister if everyone's wishes came true. Then life wouldn't be life.

    Just remember if your duas didn't get answered allah (swt) has something better planned for you. You just have to be patient and have faith. After all life is a test. You will come across difficulties and hardship and remember it will just be a test from allah (swt) to see if you are strong and still have faith in allah (swt).

    So if you don't perform well in your exams etc then don't lose faith in allah (swt). Think of it as a good thing because you know that allah (swt) has something better planned for you.

    I wish you the very best.

  3. Quote "Hydden":
    What angers me more and makes me want to slap her so tight is her other saying, "It was a regrettable choice to send you to a Muslim school." How can she have the right to say that? I'd be straying around in the twisted paths instead now otherwise. Really, they've crossed the line and I have raging urges to insult and beat them up now.


    Let me first of all ask you a question Hydden, is this the influence Islam seems to have had on you that for your own lack of courage to practice what you believe in so firmly, you have the audacity to curse, insult and even beat up the very parents who have raised you so lovingly and are at least letting you do what you wish to!

    As far as "how can she have the RIGHT" is concerned, if you can have the right to convert to an altogether different religion, your mother certainly has the right to question a decision she took for you! (Makes sense?)

    You see, you need to realise one thing here, that if you want your parents to respect your right and not question your decision, then you also need to learn to respect your parents' rights instead of having 'raging urges' to give them a tight slap! (Astafigurallah!!!)

    Also, your post reeks of arrogance and a sense of false superiority, which let me tell you, clearly isn't a virtue of a good Muslim or any good human being!

    As far as God accepting our prayers is concerned, first of all please learn to be true and honest to God, to yourself and to your parents, be modest, be humble and overall be respectful towards your parents.

    You still have a lot to learn, and above all practice what you're trying to preach (at least to your parents).

    • Asaalamualikum

      I do agree that you should have have all the love,care, and respect for your parents but it is hard when they say evil things to you and make you feel ashamed of something you know and fill in your heart is right.But i have a question what do you do if your parents are trying to stop you from going to Jummah and hanging around Muslims and they never once raised you or loved you ?

      • Wailakkum assalam.

        I pray Zuhr instead of Jummah in my house.

        No, my parents don't stop me from hanging out with my Muslim friends. Instead they criticize them.

    • Salaam.

      Your user name had made me realize to do that as well. Love it.

      I thank you for bringing light to my character. You see, I wrote this post in an extremely blind rage, that I actually didn't realize I had written such horrible things.

      You said, "Also, your post reeks of arrogance and a sense of false superiority, which let me tell you, clearly isn't a virtue of a good Muslim or any good human being!"

      I never realized that! I need to work out on my flaws as well. True, ever since the beginning, I lacked courage and whatever wrong I committed my parents would shout at me. This behaviour would 'appear' when practising Islam. That's what angered me even though I was doing nothing wrong. I suppose shaitan-ar rajeem took advantage of this point and messed up my thoughts.

      I again thank you for pointing out my mistakes. Will improve upon them Insha Allah.

      Jazak Allah Khair.

  4. Assalamualaikum little sister,

    I pray that Allah accepts you and give you a beautiful return after your death - when we all shall meet Allah, in sha Allah.

    Sister, you practiced in secret until your parents were unaware. Now that they have come to know that you have begun offering prayers, do not hasten in completing them. But contemplate on each word you recite in it. Pray with humility, that is what is so sweet in a prayer which you must have felt earlier.

    Recite as much as you can in Arabic, that you have been learning. Reward is with Allah for your struggle in sha Allah. Have patience and trust in Allah. He shall not leave you alone. He Is always watching you and He Loves you.

    It is great that you wish your parents would accept Islam, because you love them and want them to see what you have seen and want them to believe what you believe. But sister, Islam is not given to someone by force. Allah Guides who He Wills, just like He Chose to Guide you. You have accepted the path of Allah, but your parents do not have the tawfeeq yet. Do not be sad for that, sister. Allah Will Guide if He Wishes, but you can do what you can, by being good to them and ignoring their comments about Islam.

    If they speak ill about Islam, will Islam become bad? Islam is pure and shall remain pure, sister. You have recognized the purity and have embraced it, while your parents do not see that purity or they do not want to see it.

    The reason they hate Islam so much is perhaps because they think Islam has taken their daughter away from them, and sister, you would be demonstrating that if you do not control your anger.

    I know how it feels when someone abuses the most valuable treasure you have. But when Islam began in Makkah with the prophethood of Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam, the enemies went far from just abusing the deen. They tormented the Muslims with red hot iron, hot rocks and the likes. They did not even spare the best of all creation - Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam.

    Some of the people even set out to kill the prophet, but Allah Saved him. And do you know? One of them who had set out to kill him later became a best friend of the prophet himself. He was Umar Radiyallahu Anhu. Allah Gave him the tawfeeq and he became one of the best companions of Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam. But on the other hand, Allah's Messenger Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam had an uncle named Abu Talib. He helped his nephew with his life, but was not given the tawfeeq to accept the message he brought, and hence, he died as an idolator. Allah's Messenger Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam wanted to bring him on Islam because of his struggle, but he could not. Because Allah Said:

    إِنَّكَ لَا تَهْدِي مَنْ أَحْبَبْتَ وَلَٰكِنَّ اللَّهَ يَهْدِي مَنْ يَشَاءُ ۚ وَهُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِالْمُهْتَدِينَ
    Indeed, [O Muhammad], you do not guide whom you like, but Allah guides whom He wills. And He is most knowing of the [rightly] guided.

    Allah Guided you, but not your parents yet. I say 'yet' because you can be a source of Guidance for them. That is by overlooking their comments and being nice to them, smiling at them, showing care for them and so on.

    Obey them in matters that do not bother your faith. But if you are asked to do something involving disobedience of Allah and His Rasool, deny them obedience with honor. You must be thinking: is that possible? Yes it is! Look at the following:

    وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنْسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ وَفِصَالُهُ فِي عَامَيْنِ أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ
    And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.
    وَإِنْ جَاهَدَاكَ عَلَىٰ أَنْ تُشْرِكَ بِي مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ فَلَا تُطِعْهُمَا ۖ وَصَاحِبْهُمَا فِي الدُّنْيَا مَعْرُوفًا ۖ وَاتَّبِعْ سَبِيلَ مَنْ أَنَابَ إِلَيَّ ۚ ثُمَّ إِلَيَّ مَرْجِعُكُمْ فَأُنَبِّئُكُمْ بِمَا كُنْتُمْ تَعْمَلُونَ
    But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me [in repentance]. Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.

    Care for your parents and be kind to them. If they speak ill about Islam, it is not going to affect Islam to the least. Islam has remained pure and shall remain pure because it came from The True Lord.

    Apart from this, sister, it is upon you to worship Allah in the best manner you can. Yes, covering your entire body is compulsory. But what if you are not able to? Will Allah hold you responsible for it? Allah Knows Best what you can do, and He Says:

    Allah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity. (Surah al Baqarah, 286)

    Allah also said:

    فَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ مَا اسْتَطَعْتُمْ وَاسْمَعُوا وَأَطِيعُوا وَأَنْفِقُوا خَيْرًا لِأَنْفُسِكُمْ ۗ وَمَنْ يُوقَ شُحَّ نَفْسِهِ فَأُولَٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُفْلِحُونَ
    So fear Allah as much as you are able and listen and obey and spend [in the way of Allah ]; it is better for your selves. And whoever is protected from the stinginess of his soul - it is those who will be the successful.

    Do as much as you can. For whatever you are not able, in sha Allah, He will not hold you responsible. And when He Knows that His little servant loves Him and is fighting with the world just for Him, do you think He will withhold from you what is good for you? It is just that there is a time for everything and patience is the key to success.

    Sister, when you are beginning the prayer, now that I have asked you to pray openly, you can put on a scarf or a cloth to cover your head also. You can cover your feet by wearing socks or something. In sha Allah, gradually, you will see some change in your parents.

    But if they do not change, do not despair. Allah Guides who He Wills, as I told you. Yes, keep doing duas that Allah opens their heart. But how beautiful will it be, if they see how kind you have become, how humble and a caring person you have become after your choice of Islam? How great it will be, when they see that their little daughter has got a great ability to have patience and tolerate abuse of her most valued treasure, her deen? This MAY influence them to be inclined to Islam. But this may take time. Some days, or even years, or it may fail to happen. Do not lose hope in Allah, but do not despair if He does not make them Muslim. He Knows what is best and shall choose for you the best. Trust in Him and never lose hope.

    Islam's teachigs are beautiful. They teach you kindness and peace. In sha Allah, if you practice these in your life, you will find the tranquility that a true Muslim has, which is a gift from Allah.

    About the name:

    How about "Maimoonah"? It roughly means lucky. Or "Mumtaaz", which means excellent (nearest to awesome 🙂 ) or "Zakiyyah" (clever/intelligent/brilliant) or "Kareemah" (kind) or "Afeefah" ( chaste/pure) or "Hadiyyah" (gift).

    You can choose one of these or any other name you like. And may Allah Give you Barakah and make you strong to have patience and meet Allah, while He Is Pleased with you.

    Also, sister, remember me, your older brother in your du'as.

    Abu Abdul Bari Editor

    • Walaikum assalam, elder brother.

      I thank you for giving examples from our beloved Prophet's (sallAllahu alayhi wasaalam) time. They both inspired and shocked me. I am just a mustard seed compared to him and his companions.

      I also thank you for choosing names for me (although I want to be named with all of them, so greedy of me 🙂 ).

      Jazak Allah Khair.

  5. Assalaam waalaikum wa rahmatAllahi wa barkatuhu.

    Thank you all dear older brothers and sisters. Reading your answers calmed me down. I'll try my best to be patient Insha Allah, one of the qualities I lack.

    Jazak Allak Khair.

    • Walaikumassalam Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuhu.

      Wa antum fa jazakumullahu khairan [ And you too, May Allah reward you with Khayr ]

      I would like to share with you some of the verses and hadiths on rights of parents inshaAllah. Please read them.

      The rights of parents are great indeed. Allaah mentions parents’ rights in conjunction with His own rights in many verses, for example, when He says (interpretation of the meaning):

      “Worship Allaah and join none with Him (in worship); and do good to parents”
      [al-Nisa’ 4:36]

      “And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents”

      [al-Isra’ 17:23]

      “And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years give thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination”

      [Luqmaan 31:14]

      “And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour.

      And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: ‘My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young.’”

      [al-Isra’ 17:23-24]

      “But if they (both) strive with you to make you join in worship with Me others that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not; but behave with them in the world kindly” [Luqmaan 31:15]


      In al-Saheehayn it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was asked which deed is best. He said, “Prayer performed on time.” He was asked, then what? He said, “Honouring one’s parents.” He was asked, then what? He said, “Jihad for the sake of Allaah.”

      Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “A man came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, who among the people is most deserving of my good companionship?’ He said, ‘Your mother.’ The man asked, ‘Then who?’ He said, ‘Your mother.’ He asked, then who?’ He said, ‘Your mother.’ He asked, ‘Then who?’ He said, ‘Your father.’”

      And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The pleasure of Allaah is in pleasing one’s father and the anger of Allaah is in angering one’s father.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1821; classed as saheeh by Ibn Hibaan and al-Haakim, from the hadeeth of ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr ibn al-‘Aas (may Allaah be pleased with him). The version narrated by al-Tabaraani refers to “parents” (instead of “father”). And there are very many ahaadeeth which state that it is obligatory to honour one’s parents and treat them kindly.

      The opposite of honouring them is disobeying them, which is one of the major sins, because it is proven in al-Saheehayn that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Shall I not tell you of the greatest of major sins?” – three times – and we said, “Yes, O Messenger of Allaah.” He said: “Associating others in worship with Allaah, and disobeying one’s parents,” – and he was reclining, but he sat up and said, “And false speech and false witness.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2654; Muslim, 126.

      also visit this link and read inshaAllah. ->islamqa(dot)info/en/ref/5053 [replace (dot) with . }

      If I have a daughter.. inshaAllah i will name her Khadīja.

      Khadija is the name of the first wife of the prophet Muhammed (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) 's . See if you like this name

  6. aslam o alaikum,

    mashALLAH you guys are doing a great job. God bless you all

    i actually want to suggest a name for my sister @HYDDEN and that name is EMAN i think this name will suit you..
    stay blessed

  7. Dear Sister Hydden, keep this thing attached like fewi-kwik in your heart: ALLAH will not leave anyone go stray if they turn to Him sincerely and have hope from Him just out of his fear and love.

    About the prayer, if you want to do it away from parents, i suggest you could use different methods of salah. For example, offer it on a chair etc. The concept of darura (Necessity in Islamic Law) provides leniency during difficult situations.

    Importantly, you should not get let down due to anti-Islamic behavior of your parents or somebody else. The Prophet had to bear them a lot during his time. Then who are we to complain? You have to distinguish between Muslims & Islamic concepts. Its my POV that if they intend you should talk to them about Islamic issues but about the Muslim behavior its better to be silent since it will create more confrontation. Also we IndMuslims get kicked day in & day out from the media.

    Moreover, you need to have patience more than ever and control your anger.

    I presume you are in college but since you are the main breadwinner for the family, you have to plan the next career moves carefully, so as not to distance the family from yourselves but also to practice Islam with more dedication and sincerity. I know, its quite hard at this point, but the era of the Companions of the Prophets is our role model.

    Pray to Allah to guide the Parents with Hidayah, the right path from wrong one.

    Since you live in NCR, if you wish to, get assistance from IDC run by reverts under the guidance of prominent scholars, which caters to the needs of the reverts themselves.

    Br.Umar Gautam
    Islamic Dawah Center (IDC),

  8. Wow! Sorry you are going through this bless ur sounds like U DO NOT have a religious problem...but there are some relationship and communication problems between you and your parents. Sometimes we become angry and tend to point the finger at unrelated people or religion.....Hating your parents will not lead them to accepting your faith. Be slow in your anger...treat them with kindness and love and overtime they may begin to accept the new u..........Blessings.

  9. Hey hyyden..

    I need ur help.. I have of late read abt the stories in Quran and that has intrigued me to practice islam.. I dont mean hard core.. but as a religion to me islam makes more sense. Rather than being an atheist-hindu, I would rather secretly practice despite being hindu (at lesst for nw) 😛

    So where do I start ?

    • Hello Gopal,

      I am happy to hear your interest in Islam. I am not hydden, of course. But I have a suggestion.

      The best thing to do is approach someone who can tell you about Islam.

      Where did you hear about the Stories of Islam? And where do you live? I may help you in locating a place where you can get authentic information. The following website is best to begin with:

      If you have any particular question, you can login and submit a new post and we shall publish it in turn, God Willing. And we may even be able to guide you along the way, to help you see the truth.

      Abu Abdul Bari Editor

  10. Assalamualikum
    Allah gives you straight direction and enhance your power of eemaan . My prayers are with you May He helps you. dont be afraid of any one nor lose your hope, because Allah is with you, Nothing can harm nor beneficial, if Allah dnt want. In difficult situation you should (say) tasbeeh as possible as you can:
    La ilaha illa Anta, Subhanaka, inni kuntu mina z-zalimin.

    لا إلهَ إلا أنتَ سُبْحَانَكَ إِنِّي كُنْتُ مِنَ الظّالِمِيْنَ
    No God, but You. Glory unto You. I am really a transgressor.

    Allahumma la sahla illa maa ja’altahu sahlan, wa Anta taj’alu l-hazna idha shi’ta sahla.

    اللّهُمَّ لا سَهْلَ إلا ما جَعَلْتَهُ سَهْلا وَأنتَ تَجْعَلُ الحَزْنَ إذا شِئْتَ سَهْلا
    “O Allah! There is no ease except that which You make easy, and indeed You, when You want, make difficulties easy.” [Sahih Ibn Hibban]

    Ya Hayyu Ya Qayyum! Bi rahmatika astagheeth!

    يَا حَيُّ يَا قَيُّوْمُ بِرَحْمَتِكَ أَسْتَغِيْث
    Oh Living, oh Sustainer, in your mercy I plead for rescue. (At-Tirmidhi)

    Never lose hope, Allah never leaves you untill end of your life. Insha Alah. Fulfill your obligations in each cost. I suggest that you should wear cloth on head atleast (dubata lyna) and full sleeves . Saw the reactoin of your parents. Answer them that it gives me security and confidence.
    May Allah make the heart of your parents and enhance love of you and Islam.
    May Allah give us right path and give power to do right.

  11. asalam mualaikum can somebody please help me my mother does not let me go to the masjid only my father but he works how will i go to the masjid if my mom wont let me when she is able to.she is sad and lazy everyday she never prays 5 times a day she was born non muslim she is hispanic how will i deal with her taking me to the masjid and praying.

    • Dear Brother,

      It is beauty of our religion Islam that we are not required to go to some particular place to worship Allah (swt)...any neat and clean place is all that you need to remember almighty and worship him.

      No doubt, it is advisable and one likes to go to Masjid to offer salah but its not mandatory. if your mother does not allow you, then you can offer your salah at home or around- any place where it is possible. Insha-allh your saleh will be acceptable.

      Practice Islam at your possible best and never be harsh towards your mother as our Islam teaches. Insha-allah soon she will also get interested towards Islam.

      make lots of duas to Allah (swt), he will guide & help you. Aameen

      your sister

  12. dont worry at all, insha-allah, allah will help u pass ur exams, and he will open ur parents hearts once and for all, He is all mercyful, and forgiving.dont be ashamed at all, u are on the right path, and soon, if u keep it up, Allah will insha-allah grant u a spot in al-Janah

  13. Its been almost a year since you've posted your situation, and the world around you may have already changed for the better or for the worse....

    Consider my case, I was a sunni muslim born and raised in Canada (Ottawa)... You can practice all the islam that you want in your home under the umbrella of our parents teachings, but there are many of us that follow the religion with a robotic undertone... We follow our parents in their teachings and we know the religion has an authentic beauty, but when we step out into the dunya of the western world... it is like you are walking through a world of fitna... every direction you turn there is fitna... imagine a society where there are beautiful women from every corner of the world all in one place... you go to your job, and there are beautiful women of spanish heritage (like jenifer lopez), black descent (like beyonce), asian descent, white girls and so on.... and the standards of dress make it difficult to live and work daily life.... so regardless of how strong you are... it is difficult for a man to lower his gaze... so have i set myself up to fail...? One could argue that we should leave this environment and go back to muslim countries..

    The difference between you and I is that i am robotic in in the practice of my religion moving with the flow of the river...

    You on the other hand are a thinker and you practice islam for yourself against the flow of the river... The last thing you want to do is leave your parents behind... There is nothing that you can do to change the hearts of your parents until allah changes it for them....

    but what you can do, is not practice your islam with aggression... but compassion... your job is not to convert your parents or to convert the rest of the world... that is not your job... Your job is to continue to flow upstream.... Your job is to stop stressing out so much about the prayers and your parents... You need to take the smallest actions and be consistent with them... You make your wudu and you pray behind closed doors in which case you have met the minimal requirements for allah... then you take the abuse of your parents, and you then respond with actions of good nature... they curse, you love... they spit you hug... they disown you, you own them... they hate you, you try to joke with them...

    you are a lucky girl... you have an opportunity to practice in an ancient mecca.... you are surrounded by idolitry and unbelievers... but... havinjg said that... your parents could spit on you day and night, but they are still only people... the time will come when they are older and they will acknowledge that you have gone beyond the point of no return... afterwhich, you must care for them better than any other relative.. The muslim daughter cares for us better than any hindu relative of ours... Do not pick a husband that will turn his back on your parents because they are hindu... Choose a husband that will love your parents despit the fact that they are not muslim...

    The day will come when your parents will witness your behaviour.. Do not backbite, do not use them, do not insult them, do not allow them to do the same... Select a husband that will be patient even if your parents were to spit in his face because he is a muslim...

    Do not leave your home or run from your parents, even if you have to physically leave when you marry... Consider how the prophet muhammad loved his uncle Abu-Talib until his last breath.... the uncle who protected him from persecution within the tribe... yet it is assumed that he died a non-muslim... This hurt the prophet very much but he held steadfast...

    So as much as you have an obligation to your parents, do not forget that little hydden junior (male), or little hydden junior (female) already have rights upon you and they are not even in the design stages yet!!!! So live your life with your parents as a source of your strength.. Take each day one step at a time and do not succumb to the pressure of selecting a husband because he is cute or is a medical doctor or has money... Select a muslim man who will love your parents even in the face of islamic persecution, and a man who will help you to raise your children under the protection of an islamic umbrella..

    as i said... your situation can be something to envy...

  14. I am in the exact same situation as you. Your story soothed me heart for that I know someone is on the same boat as me. So first jazaakallah and I will make dua for your parents inshallah. And can you make dua for my parents as well, because I want jannah for my parents as much as I want it for myself. And inshallah we both can continue our prayers. I have the same problem with salah
    Regard to name, for all you mentioned I would say choose Aisha as your name, because she is the woman that had all the quality you mentioned there.

  15. I believe this is a test that Allah SWT has given to us in order for us to get more reward. He loves us so much that He put test in front of us so that we can call out to him and get closer to him. For example,all this time I believed in Allah SWT I have never felt being so close to him like yesterday and today. I can feel Him around me. I can feel His love and I testify this is true. After hardship comes ease, this is what Allah promised to us, and I testify to you. This promise was true, is true and wil l forever be true, as long as Allah SWT wills.

  16. salam 3alaykoum
    my parents dont want me too be really close to islam like my father doest pray he fasts anyway my mom hates me when i say i want to wear abaya she even hates this word she likes to stop talking to me if i said i want to wear it but thank god my parents accepted to let me wear viel and pray, look in islam you should obey your parents in everything but god will not give you sins if you disregard our parents only by doing the muslim stuf they cant stop you from praying they cant eveeen stopp you fromm wearing viel (hijab) you should be brave and do what god tells you, you will fall in many big problems but god subhanahu wa taala he will help you and he will make you stronger if you want talk to me on my email

    • if you want a name choose fatima or zahraa these two names are the names of prophet mohamad (pbuh and his family)

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