Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Cheated on my husband, will Allah forgive me?

Man with guilty woman in the background (cheating)

Cheating wife.

Asalaamu Alaykum,

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, Most merciful.

I am extremely ashamed of my actions and sincerely wish that you could assist me with my affairs.

I am married for 2 years, my husband and I were in the process of emigrating to a new country, we have no children, my parents are deceased, my husbands parents are divorced, his Mother is a non muslim, and so is his Brother. My husband is however a muslim.

My husband started his job in the new country and I stayed back for aprox 4 months after he left to start his new job, finishing my job, closing accounts, and ending off the lease at our flat. Everything went well until the very last 2 weeks before I was to leave the country to join my husband.

My husband's brother 'X' helped me move out of my flat which then allowed us a lot of time alone, and after weeks of flirting with me (and me ignoring it) finally, he kissed me and we performed foreplay with each other (not actual intercourse). However, that was only the first time, there after, we began to text each other planning ways to meet up alone. And we did, twice. We ended up sleeping together. Twice!! Astagfirullah!

I have been in the new country with my husband for almost 2 months now, his brother has sworn to secrecy, but It is becoming harder for me to keep this quiet. My husband is amazing, he is polite, sweet, very deen conscious, and so am I and this is why I cannot believe I have done such a thing to betray my husband and to anger Allah SWT.

I repent for it, I regret everything I have done, I am and always have been madly in love with my husband, we are so happy and perfect together Allah

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5 Responses »

  1. Please do not break your husband's heart. Completely forget whatever you did. It was a great SIN! You will lose him for good once you tell him the truth. You should be more worried about your awaiting punishment in the day of judgement. Fast and ask for forgiveness to Allah SWT. Please make sure it doesn't happen again! Never be alone with guys, shaytan will force you to repeat the same thing since he was already successful number of times with you. Pray and fast, may Allah forgive you.

  2. It is women like you that make me lose faith in marriage. What is a man really supposed to do, so the wife remains loyal.
    I can't provide a solution, there is no solution, but i'm disgusted. Obviously Allah will forgive you. if your repentance is sincere and there's no need to tell your husband, you'll make things worse. I can only imagine what he will go through.

    Allah commands us to only confess to Him over our sins. Even though you wronged your man, no need to inform him.

    Get over it now.

    Salaamualaikum.

  3. Assalaamualaikam sister,

    What has happened cannot be undone, but you can repent and take steps to avoid it ever happening again. We are told that even if our sins are piled as high as a mountain they will be forgiven if we are truly repentant.

    "The brother in law is death" is a commonly cited quotation, for good reason. Here is a man who is non-mahram to you but who has a strong bond and close relationship with your husband. From his perspective too it is a situation filled with difficulty, as his close bonds with his brother bring him into contact with a non-mahram woman, often in ways in which he will not have interacted with non-mahram women before.

    Having made this transgression, you need to take steps to ensure it never happens again. Observe proper limits and avoid being alone with him or letting him see your awrah.

    Work to strengthen your faith and your marriage, and find a community centre or study group you can join to make new female friends who can be positive influences in your life.

    I would also advise you to go for a sexual health checkup to ensure you have not caught any infections, and do a pregnancy test to ensure you are not pregnant.

    Midnightmoon
    IslamicAnswers.com editor