Islamic marriage advice and family advice

New To Islam; struggling with issues of Hijab and modesty.

Hijab to protect women not to oppress them.

Salam alaiykoum,

I am new to Islam and I very much want to live and behave Islamically inshallah. I am from the UK and I am engaged to be married to a man from Tunisia. I have always been someone who feels modesty is important and I try to behave towards others the way I would like people to behave towards me. I am quite shy and reserved,  and I dress Islamically,  completely, simply and loosely covered with no make up. My fiance is keen for me to befriend his best friend's wife. She is a very kind, warm and loving sister who wears hijab but not abaya and she likes make up and perfumes.

I am also much older than her, and I am older than my fiance.  She likes lots of fashion items too. I do not mean in any way to judge or criticize her inshallah, as I do like and respect her as my Islamic sister and potential friend.  I just feel at a loss as to how to proceed with the friendship. I know two other sisters, also from the UK, one who likes to wear make up and the other wears no hijab and neither of the two sisters dress Islamically. Again, I do not mean to judge or criticise inshallah.  I have a lot to learn yet inshallah, but I feel a little lost because I understand we live in a modern world, but should us sisters not be trying to live and dress Islamically, modern world or no modern world?

I don't know. maybe the problem lies with me because I have a lack of knowledge and wisdom because I am new to Islam.


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9 Responses »

  1. Assalaamualaikam

    There's no problem with being friendly and kind to our fellow sisters. Even if you don't end up being close friends with the girl, the two of you may be able to get along and enjoy time spent together.

    Different people have different opinions on how they should dress. I know sisters who wouldn't dream of leaving the house without niqab, other sisters who wear hijab with what could be described as Western clothes but ensure they are loose-fitting and modest, and others who don't wear hijab at all. The guidance given to us in the Quran and hadiths tells us that we should cover, so we should strive to do this; people will have different understandings of what this guidance means for them, and we are not responsible for the free choices of others. Ensure that you are following what this guidance means for you, and inshaAllah you may even set an example for other sisters.

    If you wish to encourage your friends and acquaintances to cover more fully, it might be helpful for you to arrange to meet them for sisters-only events and classes. There are lots of these available, to meet a wide range of interests; near where I live for example, there's a sisters-only fitness club, charitable dinners and exhibitions, study groups, taught courses... You should be able to find something that you can all enjoy, and which will encourage all of you to learn more about Islam.

    You might also want to start going to a New to Islam class, or a sisters-only study course, so that you can make more friends among your fellow sisters. InshaAllah you should be able to make friends with people you have more in common with, as well as meeting sisters from all walks of life.

    Regarding your fiance, it's important to remember that he will not be your mahram until you have had your nikah with him, so you'll need to observe appropriate boundaries when interacting with him (eg. not uncovering, not spending time alone, not engaging in flirtatious interactions).

    Midnightmoon editor

    I don't know. maybe the problem lies with me because I have a lack of knowledge and wisdom because I am new to Islam.

    Intimate parts (Islam)
    Narrated by Abu Huraira (ra): The Prophet said, "Faith (Belief) consists of more than sixty branches (i.e. parts). And Haya is a part of faith." (Bukhari)
    Narrated Aisha, Ummul Mu'minin (Radhiallaahu Ánha) "Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) said "Allah does not accept the prayer of a woman who has reached puberty unless she wears a veil."Sahih Al-Bukhari Volume 9, Book 89, Hadith # 293 more in this worlds best book

    Hijab literally means a "Veil", a "Curtain", a Partition" or a "Separation". In Shariah terms Hijab does not just refer to the head covering. It is about covering everything of a woman thus leading to a separation of her beauty from men who are not her Mahrem. This will also include her clothing, they way she smells, the way she talks and the way she walks.
    For some strange reason Hijab has been mistaken for the head covering. The head covering is actually the Khimaar.
    Unfortunately we find today women who dress in this way claim that they are observing Hijab, When in reality this was how many women in Makkah and Madina dressed before the command for Hijab. As you can see any women dressing in such a man can be recognised from her face by others. Even today we have in some Christian communities women who dress in such a way when going to church.
    The story of Hijab begins due to Umar's great respect and desire to protect the honour of the Mothers of the Believers (the Prophet's wives). Bukhari reported:

    'The wives of the Prophet used to go to Al-Manasi, a vast open place (near Baqia at Medina) to answer the call of nature at night. 'Umar used to say to the Prophet "Let your wives be veiled," but Allah's Apostle did not do so. One night Sauda bint Zam'a the wife of the Prophet went out at 'Isha' time and she was a tall lady. 'Umar addressed her and said, "I have recognized you, O Sauda." He said so, as he desired eagerly that the verses of Al-Hijab (the observing of veils by the Muslim women) may be revealed. So Allah revealed the verses of "Al-Hijab" (A complete body cover excluding the eyes).' (Bukhari)
    Revelation of the order to Hijab

    After Umar's requests for the Prophets wives to be veiled. Allah revealed the following verse.

    "O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their jalaabeeb ( outer garments, cloaks) all over their bodies. That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so as not to be annoyed. And Allah is Ever Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful"

    [al-Ahzaab 33:59]
    Then the women began to observe Hijab in front of men.
    It was narrated that Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said: "May Allah have mercy on the women of the Muhaajireen. When Allah revealed the words (interpretation of the meaning)"and to draw their Khumur all over Juyoobihinna "[al-Noor 24:31], they tore their aprons and covered their faces with them." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4480)

    • First, the woman's voice is not awrah. Second, it is very clear in the text the at the Mother's of the Believers are given instructions that specify that they are NOT like other women.

      Quran states: Say to the believing men (first) that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: And Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. And (then) say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms (24:30-31)

      Even the Wahhabi Al-Albani did not consider covering the face a requirement:

      1. The interpretation of al-idnaa’ in the verse of the Jilbaab to mean “covering the face”.

      This misinterpretation is contrary to the basic meaning of the word in Arabic which is “to come close”, as is mentioned in authoritative dictionaries like al-Mufradaat by the well-known scholar, ar-Raaghib al-Asbahaanee. However, there is sufficient evidence in the interpretation of the leading commentator on the Quran, Ibn ‘Abbaas, who explained the verse saying, “She should bring the jilbaab close to her face without covering it.” It should be noted that none of the narrations used as evidence to contradict this interpretation are authentic.

      2. The interpretation of jilbaab as “a garment which covers the face.”

      Like the previous misinterpretation, this interpretation has no basis linguistically. It is contrary to the interpretation of the leading scholars, past and present, who define the jilbaab as a garment which women drape over their head scarves (khimaar). Even Shaykh at-Tuwaijree himself narrated this interpretation from Ibn Mas‘ood and other Salafee scholars. Al-Baghawee mentioned it as the correct interpretation in his Tafseer (vol. 3, p. 518) saying, “It is the garment which a woman covers herself with worn above the dress (dir ‘) and the headscarf.” Ibn Hazm also said, “The jilbaab in the Arabic language in which the Messenger of Allaah ((may Peace Be Upon Him)) spoke to us is what covers the whole body and not just a part of it.” (vol. 3, p. 217). Al-Qurtubee declared this correct in his Tafseer and Ibn Katheer said, “It is the cloak worn above the headscarf.” (vol. 3, p. 518)

      3. The claim that the khimaar (headscarf) covers the head and the face.

      In doing so “the face” has been arbitrarily added to its meaning in order to make the verse:

      "Let them drape their headscarves over their busoms"

      appear to be in their favor, when, in fact it is not. The word khimaar linguistically means only a head covering. Whenever it is mentioned in general terms, this is what is intended. For example in the hadeeths on wiping (mas-h) on the khimaar and the prophetic statement, “The salaah of a woman past puberty will not be accepted without a khimaar.” This hadeeth confirms the invalidity of their misinterpretation, because not even the extremists themselves – much less the scholars – use it as evidence that the covering of a woman’s face in salaah is a condition for its validity. They only use it as proof for covering the head. Furthermore, their interpretation of the verse of the Qawaa

      "to remove their clothing"

      to mean “jilbaab” further confirms it. They hold that it is permissible for old women to appear before marriagealbe males in her headscarf with her face exposed. One of their noteable scholars openly stated that. As for Shaykh at-Tuwaijree, he implied it without actually saying it.

      After checking the opinions of the early and later scholars in all the specializations, I found that they unanimously hold that the khimaar is a head covering. I have mentioned the names of more than twenty scholars, among them some of the great Imaams and hadeeth scholars. For example, Abul-Waleed al-Baajee (d. 474 AH) who further added in his explanation, “Nothing should be seen of her besides the circle of her face.”

      4. The claim of a consensus (Ijmaa‘) on the face being considered ‘awrah.

      Shaykh at-Tuwaijree claimed that scholars unanimously held that the woman’s face was ‘awrah and many who have no knowledge, including some Ph.D. holders, have blindly followed him. In fact, it is a false claim, which no one before him has claimed. The books of Hambalite scholars which he learned from, not to mention those of others, contain sufficient proof of its falsehood. I have mentioned many of their statements in Ar-Radd. For example, Ibn Hubayrah al-Hambalee stated in his book, al-Ifsaah, that the face is not considered ‘awrah in the three main schools of Islaamic law and he added, “It is also a narrated position of Imaam Ahmad.” Many Hambalite scholars preferred this narration in their books, like Ibn Qudaamah and others. Ibn Qudaamah in al-Mughnee explained the reason for his preference saying, “Because necessity demands that the face be uncovered for buying and selling, and the hands be uncovered for taking and giving.”

      Among the Hambalite scholars, is the great Ibn Muflih al-Hambalee about whom Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah said, “There is no one under the dome of the sky more knowledgeable about the school of Imaam Ahmad than Ibn Muflih.” And his teacher, Ibn Taymiyyah, once told him, “You aren’t Ibn Muflih, you are Muflih!”

      It is incumbent on me to convey Ibn Muflih’s statements for the readers because of the knowledge and many benefits contained in them. Included in them is further confirmation of the falsehood of Shaykh at-Tuwaijree’s claim and support for the correctness of my position on the issue of uncovering the face. Ibn Muflih stated the following in his valuable work al-Aadaab ash-Shar‘iyyah – which is among the references cited by Shaykh at-Tuwaijree (something which indicates that he is aware of it, but has deliberately hidden these crucial facts from his readers while claiming the contrary):

      “Is it correct to chastise marriageable women if they uncover their faces in the street?

      The answer depends on whether it is compulsory for women to cover their faces or whether it is compulsory for men to lower their gaze from her. There are two positions on this issue.

      1.Regarding the hadeeth of Jareer in which he said, “I asked Allaah’s Messenger about the sudden inadvertent glance and he instructed me to look away.” Al-Qaadee ‘Iyaad commented, “The scholars, May Allaah Most High have mercy on them, have said that there is proof in this hadeeth that it is not compulsory for a woman to cover her face in the street. Instead, it is a recommended sunnah for her to do so and it is compulsory for the man to lower his gaze from her at all times, except for a legislated purpose. Shaykh Muhyud-deen an-Nawawee mentioned that without further explanation.”

      2.Then al-Muflih mentioned Ibn Taymiyyah’s statement which at-Tuwaijree relies on in his book (page 170), while feigning ignorance of the statements of the majority of scholars. Statements like those of al-Qaadee ‘Iyaad and an-Nawawee’s agreement with it.

      Then al-Muflih said, “On the basis of that, is chastisement legal? Chastisement is not allowed in issues in where there is a difference of opinion, and the difference has already been mentioned. As regards our opinion and that of a group of Shaafi‘ite scholars and others, looking at a marriageable woman without desire or in a secluded circumstance is permissible. Therefore, chastisement is not proper.”

      This answer is in complete agreement with Imaam Ahmad’s statement, “It is not proper that a jurist oblige people to follow his opinion (math-hab).” And this is if the truth were on his side. What of the case where the jurist proudly, dishonestly misleads people and declares other Muslims to be disbelievers as at-Tuwaijree did on page 249 of his book saying,

      “… Whoever permits women to expose their faces and uses the proofs of al-Albaanee has flung open the door for women to publicly flaunt their beauty and emboldened them to commit the reprehensible acts done by women who uncover their faces today.” And on page 233 he said, “… and to disbelief in the verses of Allaah.”

      Those are his words – May Allaah reform him and guide him. What would he say about Ibn Muflih, an-Nawawee, al-Qaadee ‘Iyaad and other Palestinian scholars, as well as the majority of scholars who preceded them and who are my salaf regarding my opinion on this matter?

      5. The agreement of at-Tuwaijree and the extremists with him to explain away the authentic hadeeths which contradict their opinion.

      At-Tuwaijree did this with the Khath‘amiyyah hadeeth. They developed a number of comical methods to nullify its implications. I have refuted them all in ar-Radd and one of them in Jilbaab al-Mar’ah al-Muslimah. Some reputable scholars have said that the hadeeth doesn’t contain a clear statement that her face was exposed. This is among the farthest opinions from the truth. For, if her face wasn’t exposed, where did the narrator or the viewer get the idea that she was beautiful? And what was al-Fadl repeatedly looking at? The truth is that this is among the strongest and most clear proofs that a woman’s face is not ‘awrah. In spite of that, there remains a group that insists that she was in ihraam while knowing that her ihraam does not prevent her from draping some of her clothing over her face. At-Tuwaijree does accept sometimes that her face was uncovered but he cancels its implication by saying, “There is no evidence in it that she continuously exposed her face!” He means that the wind must have exposed her face and at that instant al-Fadl ibn ‘Abbaas saw it. Is it possible for an Arab to say that after reading in the hadeeth “al-Fadl began to stare while turning towards her,” and in another narration “… so he began to look at her and her beauty amazed him.” Isn’t this pride with two protruding horns? At other times at-Tuwaijree interprets it as al-Fadl looking at her size and stature.

      6. The frequent use of inauthentic hadeeths and unreliable narrations.

      For example, the hadeeth of Ibn ‘Abbaas about exposing only one eye is commonly used by those who insist that women are obliged to cover their faces in spite of their knowledge of its inauthenticity. In fact, one among them also declared it inauthentic. Perhaps the most important of these unreliable hadeeth commonly used as evidence is the one in which the Prophet is reported to have said, “Are you both blind?” They blindly followed at-Tuwaijree and the others in claiming that this inauthentic narration was strengthened by other supportive narrations and that it was evidence for the prohibition of women from looking at men, even if they are blind. They took this position in spite of the fact that the narration was classified inauthentic by the leading verification experts among the hadeeth scholars like, Imaam Ahmad, al-Bayhaqee and Ibn ‘Abdil-Barr. Al-Qurtubee related that the narration was not considered authentic among the scholars of hadeeth. Consequently, many Palestinian hambalite scholars made their rulings on that basis. Furthermore, that is what the science of hadeeth and its methodology requires as was clearly stated in al-Irwaa. However, in spite of all that evidence to the contrary, Shaykh ‘Abdul-Qaadir as-Sindee had the nerve to go along with Shaykh at-Tuwaijree and others and claim that its chain of narration was authentic. By doing that he exposed himself and his ignorance or feigned ignorance. It is unfortunate that he took this position, because the hadeeth’s chain contains an unknown narrator from whom only one person narrated along with its contradiction to what leading scholars have narrated. Contrary to the level of scholarship that we are used to from Shaykh as-Sindee, he has brought in support of his claim the most amazing things. He arguments unexpectedly contain deception, misguidance, blind following, hiding knowledge and turning away from his own fundamental principles. Among the amazing positions is Shaykh as-Sindee’s feigned ignorance that the narration contradicts the hadeeth of Faatimah bint Qays which contains the Prophet’s permission for her to stay at the home of the blind companion, Ibn Umm al-Maktoom, whom she would be able see. The Prophet gave the reason for that instruction in his statement to her, “For if you take off your head scarf, he won’t see you.” In at-Tabaraanee’s narration from Faatimah, she said, “He instructed me to be at Ibn Umm Maktoom’s home because he couldn’t see me whenever I took my head scarf off.”

      There are also a number of other unreliable hadeeths gathered by at-Tuwaijree in his book. I mentioned ten of them in my response, and among them are some fabricated traditions.

      7. The classification of some authentic hadeeths and confirmed narrations from the Companions as inauthentic.

      The extremists have declared well-established reliable narrations as unreliable and feigned ignorance of strengthening narrations. They have further declared some narrations extremely inauthentic, like the hadeeth of ‘Aa’ishah concerning the woman who reaches puberty, “Nothing should be seen of her besides her face and hands.” They have persistently declared it inauthentic – the ignorant among them blindly following others devoid of knowledge. In so doing, they contradict those among the leading scholars of hadeeth who strengthen it like al-Bayhaqee and ath-Thahabee. Most of them, including some prominent scholars, feign ignorance of its various chains of narration. In fact, at-Tuwaijree openly stated on page 236 of his book that this statement was only narrated in ‘Aa’ishah’s hadeeth. Even though he has seen with his own eyes on pages 57-9 of my book two other chains: one of which is from Asmaa bint ‘Umays and the other from Qataadah in the abbreviated (mursal) format with an authentic chain of narration. Many of the blind followers followed him, including some female authors as in Hijaabuki ukhtee al-muslimah [Your veil, my sister Muslim], page 33.

      They also pretend to be ignorant of the leading hadeeth scholars and others who strengthened it, like al-Munthiree, az-Zayla‘ee, al-‘Asqlaanee and ash-Shawkaanee. Some of those who promote themselves as being among the well versed in this noble science – in their forefront Shaykh as-Sindee – claim that some of its narrations are extremely weak and unreliable in order to escape from the hadeeth science rule that ‘unreliable narrations are strengthened by narrations similar to them’. In doing that, they delude their readers into thinking that no one ruled the weak narrators, like ‘Abdullaah ibn Lahee‘ah, trustworthy and that they cannot be used as supportive evidence. In doing that, they contradict the methodology of the hadeeth scholars in using supportive evidence. Among them is Imaam Ahmad and Ibn Taymiyyah – may Allaah have mercy on them. Likewise, they all feign ignorance that the scholars – among them Imaam ash-Shaafi‘ee –confirm the hadeeth mursal if most scholars use it as evidence, as is the case of ‘Aa’ishah’s hadeeth.

      Other strengthening factors may be added to the above.

      (a) The hadeeth has been narrated by Qataadah from ‘Aa’ishah.
      (b) It has been narrated in another chain from Asmaa.
      (c) All three narrators of the hadeeth ruled according to it.

      1.Qataadah stated in his interpretation of the verse on draping, “Allaah has placed on them the requirement to cover the eyebrows,” That is, “and not on their faces” as stated by at-Tabaree.

      2.‘Aa’ishah said, regarding the female in ihraam, “She may drape the garment on her face, if she wishes.” This was narrated by al-Bayhaqee in an authentic chain of narrators. There is clear evidence in ‘Aa’ishah’s giving the female pilgrim a choice in draping that in her opinion the face was not ‘awrah. Otherwise she would have made it obligatory on them as those who contradict it do. Because of their position, most of the extremist authors, with at-Tuwaijree in the forefront, hid this statement of Umm al-Mu’mineen, ‘Aa’ishah from their readers. The author of Faslul-khitaab [The Definitive Statement] deliberately deleted this portion of al-Bayhaqee’s narration in his book. This being only one of a number of similar disreputable acts which I have exposed in my book. The supportive evidence is that this authentic narration from her strengthens her hadeeth from the Prophet. This is among the facts that people are unaware of or they pretend ignorance of, either choice is bitter to swallow.

      3.As for Asmaa, it has been authentically reported from Qays ibn Abee Haazim that he saw her as a woman of white complexion with tatoos on her hands.

      (d) The narration of Ibn ‘Abbaas earlier mentioned, “She should pull the jilbaab (cloak) close to her face without putting it on her face.” His interpretation of the verse of adornment

      "except what appears from it"

      as referring to“the face and hands” was similar. There is also a similar narration from Ibn ‘Umar to the same effect.

      At this point, a bitter reality must be noted due to the lessons which may be gained from it, the knowledge which it contains and is service as a reminder of the wise saying: “The truth is not know by people, know the truth and you will know people.”

      At the same time that Shaykh at-Tuwaijree insists on rejecting the hadeeth of ‘Aa’ishah and its supporting evidences, among them Qaatadah’s mursal narration, he willingly accepts another inauthentic hadeeth from her with mursal support. In that hadeeth it is mentioned “…that she wore a niqaab (face veil)…” and that she was supposed to have described the Prophet’s wife Safiyyah and the Ansaar women as “… a jewess among jewesses…” which is considered by scholars to be a very erroneous statement (munkar jiddan). The Shaykh argues on page 181, “It has mursal supportive evidence,” and quotes one of the mursal hadeeths of ‘Ataa containing a known liar in its chain of narration.

      One should reflect on the great difference between this fabricated supportive evidence and the authentic supportive evidence of Qataadah further supported by other evidences, then ask, “Why did at-Tuwaijree accept the second hadeeth of ‘Aa’ishah and not the first?” The obvious answer is that the accepted one contains reference to wearing the niqaab – even though it does not indicate obligation – while the rejected one denies it. Thus, in this regard, the Shaykh did not base his position on Islaamic legal principles, but on something similar to the Jewish principle: The ends justify the means. May Allaah help us.

      8. Placing unreasonable conditions

      Among the amazing practices of some latter day blind following hanafite scholars and others is that on one hand they agree with us regarding the permissibility of women exposing their faces, because that was the position of their Imaams, but on the other hand they agree with the extremists in opposition to their Imaams. They make ijtihaad (while claiming taqleed) by adding the condition that the society be safe from fitnah to the position of the Imaams. This refers to the fitnah caused by women to men. Then one of the ignorant contemporary blind followers went to the extreme of actually attributing this “condition” to the Imaams themselves. Among some of those having no knowledge, this resulted in their concluding that there is essentially no difference between the position of the Imaams and the extremists.

      It is obvious to jurists that this condition is invalid because it implies that humans know something which the Lord missed knowing. That is, the temptation of women did not exist during the time of the Prophet ((may Peace Be Upon Him)) thus we had to create a special ruling for it which did not exist previously. In fact, the fitnah did exist during the era of divine legislation and the story of al-Fadl ibn ‘Abbaas’ trial with the Khath‘amiyyah woman and his repeated looking at her is not far from the readers’ memories.

      It is well known that when Allaah Most High instructed men and women to lower their gazes and instructed women to veil themselves in front of men, He did that to block the road to corruption and prevent temptation. In spite of that, He – Most Great and Glorious – did not command that they cover their faces and hands in front of them. The Prophet ((may Peace Be Upon Him)) further emphasized that in the story of al-Fadl by not commanding the woman to cover her face. And Allaah was truthful when He said,

      "And your Lord is not forgetful"

      The reality is that the condition of there not being fitnah was only mentioned by scholars regarding the man’s looking at the woman’s face, as in al-Fiqh ‘alaa al-mathaahib al-arba‘ah, page 12. They said, “That [the woman’s face may be uncovered] is permissible on condition that there is safety from temptation,” and that is true, contrary to what the blind followers practice. They conclude from it that the woman is obliged to cover her face, when in fact it is not a necessary consequence. They know that the condition of safety from temptation also applies to women. For it is not permissible for them to stare at a man’s face except where there is safety from temptation. Is it then a necessary consequence that men also veil their faces from women to prevent temptation as some tribes called the Tawareg do.

      They would have a basis in fiqh of the Quraan and Sunnah if they said that a woman veiled in correct jilbaab who fears being harmed by some corrupt individuals due to her face being exposed is obliged to cover her face to prevent harm and temptation. In fact, it could even be said that it is obligatory on her not to leave her home if she feared that some evil authorities supported by a leader who does not rule by what Allaah revealed, as exists in some Arab countries since a few years ago, would pull her jilbaab from her head. As to making this obligation a compulsory law for all women everywhere and in all eras, even if there did not exist any harm for veiled women, No. Absolutely not. Allaah was truthful when He said,

      "Do they have partners who legislated for them in the religion what Allaah did not permit??"

      These are the most significant of the extremist opposition’s mistakes which I thought needed brief mention due their strong link to the contents of this book. I then closed ar-Radd al-Mufhim with a reminder that extremism in the religion – considering that the Wise Legislator forbade it will not bring any good. And it is not possible for it to produce a generation of young Muslim women carrying Islaamic knowledge and practice moderately balanced, with neither excesses nor deficiencies. Not like what I have heard about some young female adherents in Arab countries when they heard the Prophet’s statement, “The woman in ihraam should neither wear a niqaab nor gloves,” they did not accept it saying instead, “We will wear our niqaabs and gloves!” No doubt, this was a direct result of the extremist views which they heard regarding the obligation of covering their faces.

      I certainly cannot imagine that this type of extremism – and this is only one example from many which I have – can possibly produce for us salafee women able to do everything their religiously guided social life demands of them in a way similar to the righteous women of the Salaf.

    • Allah says in the most Holy Quran "And Say to the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (see the explanation below), and to draw their veils all over Juyubihinna" (Surah An-Nur, Verses #30 and #31)

      We will see how the Salaf understood this matter:

      1) The opinion of the Sahaba:

      Ibn Abbas (ra) is one of the most learned men of the Sahaba (Companions). Prophet Muhammad ((may Peace Be Upon Him)) even prayed for him saying "O Allah, make him acquire a deep understanding of the religion of Islam and instruct him in the meaning and interpretation of things." He with reference to Surah An-Nur “except only that which is apparent” as Ibn Kathir narrated with a Sahih (authentic) chain of narrators, said it’s "The hand, the ring, and the face." Abdullah Ibn Omar Ibn Al-Khattab (ra) said “the face and the two hands”. Anas Ibn Malik (ra) said “the hand and the ring”. Ibn Hazm said: “all of this (statements) are in the highest of accuracy. And so are statements by Ali (ra), Aisha (ra), and other Tabi’een”.

      Now you have to think who would understand these verses better than Aisha (ra) the MOST knowledgeable woman in the matters of Islam and the wife of Prophet Muhammad ((may Peace Be Upon Him))?

      2) Scholars among the Tabi’een had many opinions on this matter:

      Some said a woman should cover all of her body except the face and the hands. This is the saying of Imam Malik, Al-Hadi, Al-Qasim (in one of his narrations), and Imam Abu Hanifa (in one of his two narrations).

      Some said she should cover all her body except the face, the hands, and the foot. This is the saying of Imam Abu Hanifa (in another narration), Al-Qasim, and Ath-thouri. Some said she should cover all her body except the face. This is the saying of Ibn Hanbal and Dawood.

      No one said the face of a woman is loins (‘Aura) except a weak narration from Ibn Hanbal and some Shafi’i scholars!

      Sa'id ibn Jubayr, 'Ata and al-Awzai have stated explicitly that the showing of the face and hands is permissible. 'Aishah (ra), Qatadah, and others have added bracelets to what may be shown of the adornments; this interpretation implies that a part of the arm may also be shown. Various scholars (such as Abu Yusuf) have allowed the exposure of the lower part of the arm up to a length varying between about four inches to one-half of the arm.

      Ibn Hazm is the Imam of the Dhahiri schools (Literal schools) mentioned many accidents prove that it is not required for a woman to cover her face.

      3) The opinion of late scholars:

      Assuredly a woman is permitted to show her face and hands because covering them would be a hardship on her, especially if she must go out on some lawful business. For example, a widow may have to work to support her children, or a woman who is not well-off may have to help her husband in his work; had covering the face and hands been made obligatory, it would have occasioned such women hardship and distress. Al-Qurtabi says, it seems probable that, since the face and hands are customarily uncovered, and it is, moreover, required that they be uncovered during acts of worship such as Salat and Hajj, the exemption (referred to in the verses of Surah al-Nur) pertains to them.

      In addition to this, we may infer from Allah's words, "Tell the believing men that they should lower their gazes", that the faces of the women of the Prophet's time were not veiled. Had the entire body including the face been covered, it would have made no sense to command them to lower their gaze, since there would have been nothing to be seen.

      Narrated Aisha, Ummul Mu'minin: Asma, daughter of AbuBakr, entered upon the Apostle of Allah ((may Peace Be Upon Him)) wearing thin clothes. The Apostle of Allah ((may Peace Be Upon Him)) turned his attention from her. He said: O Asma', when a woman reaches the age of menstruation, it does not suit her that she displays her parts of body except this and this, and he pointed to her face and hands. (Narrated by Abu Dawood # 4092).

      This Hadith has three authentic narrations and was correct by all Major Hadith scholars such as Albani.

      Narrated 'Abdullah bin Abbas: Al-Fadl (his brother) was riding behind Allah's Apostle and a woman from the tribe of Khath'am came and Al-Fadl started looking at her and she started looking at him. The Prophet turned Al-Fadl's face to the other side. The woman said, "O Allah's Apostle! The obligation of Hajj enjoined by Allah on His devotees has become due on my father and he is old and weak, and he cannot sit firm on the Mount; may I perform Hajj on his behalf?" The Prophet replied, "Yes, you may." That happened during the Hajj-al-Wida (of the Prophet). (Narrated by Bukhari # 589, Muslim, and others).

      This Hadith is very authentic since it was narrated by Bukhari and Muslim. If she was covering her face then Ibn Abbas would know that she is beautiful! Also prophet ((may Peace Be Upon Him)) did not order the girl to cover her face. This hadith was not abrogated since it happened during Hajj-al-Wida (10 AH) while the Aya of Hijab was revealed in the 5th year after the Hijra.

  3. Walaikumusalam warehmatullah e wabarakatuhu!

    Read very very carefully,
    Alhumdulillah! Happy that you revert to Islam. Masha'Allaah! May the Almighty Allaah Make you strong in your faith and belief. Amen! And all Muslims around the world. Amen!

    Your mind is very sensitive to smaller details and that is why you revert back to Islam alhumdulillah! Because in Islam, it focuses on details and makes a person a complete good human being in all aspects. Our last Prophet and the last Messenger Muhammad (peace be upon him) (sal lal laho elaehe wasallam) is the ideal example for every Muslim and Muslimah to come insha'Allaah!

    What you are lacking is the environment. Since, you are reserved by nature. And that is how a Muslimah should be reserved in Islam for preserving the chastity and purity. And every woman should be. But since Islam gave you more sensible logic and rights, it is easy for you to follow Islam easily.

    *What you need to do is stop feeling lonely. You are I know. (Psychologically speaking)
    *You will develop a sense of defense mechanism cause most of the girls and women around you don't follow Islam completely. So, your mind will think automatically that am I the only one following true Islam or is there something wrong with me just because I am new to Islam. And look you wrote it above it happened as it is. Correct! [Yes it is!]
    *So, cheer up. It is alright! [That is my answer] ! Yes! Why? Cause no one is perfect.
    *As you said, you found a potential friend and she is having so much makeup. And eventually you lead to a conclusion that how you would carry the situation further. [That shows that you switch to conclusions quickly-but it does not mean that you are wrong also as you elaborated further].
    *Your question is very valid how you will proceed further with her. Simple, carry on. Accept her change. Don't oppose her. You know that she is having a make up. But whether her make up thing is for her husband or for everyone. Even if it is for everyone then it is on her. She will answer to Allaah (subhanahu wa ta'ala) that what was the purpose and intention on the Judgement day. So, you should not care for her that part. Leave it as it is. Problem solved.
    *Regarding the Islamic knowledge, you will learn a lot from your sisters in Islam there in UK. Who really follows Islam teachings. Join them. And be careful about the UK laws as you know how the things are there for Muslims these days. And you are coming from the background you know already what I am saying about very well.
    *Read the translation of the Qur'an daily so that you develop the direct connection with Allaah (subhanahu wa ta'ala). Amen!
    *Lots of your queries will be answered by Allaah (subhanahu wa ta'ala) directly if you read and recite the Qur'an. No doubt!

    Regarding your question about the modern world,
    *UK is modern. US is ultra modern. UAE is modern. India is modern almost. Where is Islam in that?
    *You have a very genuine question. The answer is very simple. "Modesty". Where ever you find modesty there is a chance that the community or a group of community is affected by religious values.
    *Of course you can't change the whole community or a nation but you can be an ideal for the whole community or class that people and generations to come will follow. Simple.

    Hope insha'Allaah! I have answered your genuine queries very well.

    Best regards,
    Allaah Knows the Best!

    • MODESTY is not a duty but it is a requirement of all woman who claim to be Godly ...our focus should not be our neighbor and what she is doing or is not doing or focus should be submitting wholeheartedly to God...and.when we surrender our hearts to God his.light shines through us and we become living examples to those who do not know God. Continue doing his will and pray for strength.

  4. Walikumsalam

    and warm warm welcome sister 🙂

    and sister try not look at other Muslims and follow their lead, and try to look into Islam. And sister this world is test for us 🙂 and it's temptations is trap...

  5. Might I suggest starting slowly with hijab? A snood can be a good first step, or one of those turban hats. Many women in Egypt wear only the snood instead of khimar. I am not a scholar, nor do I play one on the Internet - but one needs to be aware that modern "hijab" bears far more resemblance to the attire of early 20th Century Christian nuns than to the traditional apparel of Muslim women anywhere in the world. The elaborate, black shroud of the abayah remains generally unworn to this day by quite a few Bedouin women in Saudi. It would have puzzled the peasant women of many socities who went about in loose trousers and long tops or long dresses, worn with shawls or scarves.

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