Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Converting to Islam

choosing Islam

Choosing Islam


hello(: I have been learning Islam for about 2 years now, I want to convert! and I would like to do it at a mosque.

However I have a question about changing your name after converting - I really want like to do this so others recognize me as a Muslim and to re-assemble my new life as a muslim just wondering how do I this?

And good names? Also could I change my surname to my father's first name too? And will this go on my legal papers?

How to tell my parents that I want to become muslim? How to tell my parents I have been reading Islam? How to explain to them Islam is the right religion when they have all just about media says about Islam in there brains? How to be comfortable wearing muslim clothing and comfortable wearing hijab? How to learn arabic easiest way? To take classes or learn from arabic speaker?


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12 Responses »

  1. Sister I was in a similar situation before wallahi I can help so much please call me ASAP on ******** inshallah this will be good ameen and welcome to Islam my sister alhamdulillah

    • Umar, please do not post your private contact information here. We do not allow it. Also, it's inappropriate of you to invite the sister to call you privately.

      Wael Editor

  2. Asalamu alikum sister,

    Welcome to Islam my dear. I am so glad you came to ask here.

    As for your name, you technically dont have to change it unless its something offensive....but if you want to change it anyway to be "more" muslim you can.

    But I can give you an example, my real name is Sara. Its a Muslim name, but not an obvious one because its very common. Know that Muslims come from many many parts of the world and their names reflect their heritage and where they are from, so do not feel like you have to be Zainab or Fatima to fit in.

    So if your name is like this, common and not offensive, its really not a problem.

    I have no idea about nice female names, because this is something very very personal. You can always look at the prophets wives, and famous muslim women, or you can go by meaning. You will find many many names, its a very personal decision about what name speaks to you.

    Just change your first name..surname and leave your last name the way it is.

    As for how to tell your just do. Maybe at dinner or while you are sitting down....just say.."mom and dad , i want to share something with you. I 'v been looking into different fatihs, and I am very interested in becoming a muslim"......and you go from there.

    You dont have to immediately wear the hijab, first tell your parents, give them some time. Then when you are really comfortable do it. This is not something you rush, because once you wear its a commitment. You get comfortable by knowing that you are following Allah's commandments and letting other sisters know that you are a fellow muslim ah- which will make your life a whole lot easier.

    As for learning Arabic. Go to your local mosque if you have one, and do ask if they have lessons. ITs good because you get to meet other muslims. IF not you can always do online. There is an Islamic Online University, which is a great resource to learn arabic and other topics related to Islam.

    All the best my dear, I know its scary to tell them...I remember telling my parents i wanted to wear the hijab and they freaked out! So i know. But hang in there, and know that Allah will make it easy if you are doing it for him. Make lots of dua and just do it.

  3. Excellent, thanks God -

    Talk to Imam of your mosque -

    Tell your parents you are converting to some thing very good, even if they do not like, they will one day INSHALLAH

  4. welcome to the religion of peace
    don't rush things,take ur time and tell ur parent abt it.
    once again welcome

  5. I would highly recommend trying to sit down and talk with your family about your decision as it shows your maturity

    Whether you are reading this because you are interested in becoming Muslim or have recently become Muslim and are looking for ways to tell those closest to you, then please read my story until the end and do not let my story put you off.

    If you are anticipating drama then you would be right, but if you read to the end you might be able to learn from my story.

    I became Muslim at the tender age of 17 and still lived at home with my mother who was a single parent due to my father passing away when I was just 16.

    My family had me christened as a baby but I had never really had a religious upbringing and I thought that this would go in my favor when telling my mom about my conversion to Islam.

    -Keeping it Secret
    I converted in November 2010 and I kept it a secret for three months. I would leave the house in the morning with no hijab and then run around the corner and quickly put it on, because I knew that islamically I must wear the hijab but I also didn’t want to hurt my mom.

    I would hide so many things from my mom, I told her I was vegetarian to avoid eating a non-halal (unlawful) meat, and if she poured me an alcoholic drink I would pour it down the sink when she wasn’t looking.
    Of course my behavior did start to raise suspicions, I would come in after college and my hair would be flat from my hijab and she would ask why. She also kept asking about my new Muslim friends and what happened to the ones I used to party with. At the time, I came up with an elaborate excuse; I never lied to her because that would be wrong, I would just change the subject because I didn’t feel that I was ready to tell her.

    However don’t use my behavior as a way of getting out or prolonging telling your family because it only makes things worse in the long run. Personally, when it comes to a new Muslim telling their family about their conversion, I think that it is phenomenally important that they feel that they are ready, but also not to prolong telling your family because you are scared of their reaction.

    I knew that Paradise was at my mother’s feet and I owed her the respect of telling her

    When I was in this situation, words of encouragement that helped me tell my mom was that Islam is for the rest of my life and it is not possible to avoid the subject for that, there are only so many excuses you can think of. Also, Islam teaches to respect and cherish your parents, and I knew that Paradise was at my mother’s feet and I owed her the respect of telling her and not keeping secrets from her.

    As time went by, I found that more and more people had become aware of my conversion. Although they were supportive, it wasn’t their approval I was looking for but that of my mom’s. As February approached, my faith felt stronger, and my knowledge was greater than when I had just converted. This meant that I could tell my mom and any questions she had I would have a better chance of being able to answer them than I would have three months earlier.

    I have never been good with heart the hearts or talking face to face with my mom so I chose to tell my mom through a letter.

    -Some Suggestions
    For reverts wanting to try a similar method, I would say it is a great idea if you are similar to me and cannot handle heart to hearts, however a word of caution would be to be careful on how you word your letter.
    So one evening, my mom was out with her friends and I set myself about writing this letter. The letter is something I feel is very personal between my mother and I. I would never fully disclose what was said in the letter as it is very personal. What I can say is that the way I wrote the letter was in a cowardly manner. I spoke of my adolescent and some poignant events that had shaped the person I was today, and in a way blamed my mom for not being there for me. Looking back, this was the wrong way to go about it, I was hoping that this would in some way alleviate some of my mother’s anger, but it made it worse.

    My advice for writing a letter is that it is important that you are assertive in yourself and confident that you have made the right decision and let this be understood in the manner in which your letter is written.

    There is no way of getting out of it or making it easier for anyone, you can only just tell your parents and pray that God makes it easy for you, and inshallah He will. If however it doesn’t become easier, understand that this is a test from God and He tests those He loves most to bring them closer to Him. After finishing my letter, I left it on the kettle where I knew my mother would find it in the morning. I went up to bed and tried to sleep pondering about her reaction in the morning.

    I would highly recommend trying to sit down and talk with your family about your decision as it shows your maturity in being able to make such a life changing decision.

    When I went downstairs the next day, the atmosphere felt awkward, but understand something is only awkward if you make it that way. I struggled to sit and talk face to face with my mom about Islam and would avoid bringing it up. There was much arguing for the following months mostly about stereotypes such as oppressed women, terrorism, converting for marriage, but all of this in time was erased by God’s will. When your parents may say things to you that may hurt your feelings, it is important to try and stay calm yourself as not to rile the situation and know that whatever they say to you, you know the truth and God is knower of all things.

    I have been Muslim two years this November Alhamdulilah and my mother and I get on fine now. She is very understanding and accepting of my dress change, my prayers and my diet change and has even started buying halal meat for me when I eat down at her house with my husband.
    Inshallah when you decide to tell your family with time things do become easier, and I hope that you can find comfort in that.

    All thanks is to Allah for where I am today.

  6. Assalamu-alaikum Sister .... !

    welcome to Islam true blessings from Allah swt 🙂

    In the famous hadith collected in Sahih Bukhari - Taken from The Book of Knowledge (agreed upon) -

    Man Yuridillahu bihi Khairan Yufaqqih-hu fid-Deen
    which means - Whoever Allah wishes good for, He gives him understanding of the Deen (Deen-e-Islam)

    and on other other hand i read opinions from my other brothers and sisters, i respect their views but I'm not agreed that you must discuss the matter with your family, I'd rather say you should discuss but if you do think that they won't allow you so easily to convert or they might create problems please don't discuss with them and you don't need to be.
    there is no such thing in Islam that force you to ask your family.

    and I also read a suggestion that you should think about it before converting oh my God why she should think about it, She is going to accept the true religion a way to jannah InshaAllah.

    sorry for my bad English 🙂

  7. I also converted to Islam in 2008 Alhamdulillah, my father is a pastor, after he divorced my mom, my mom decided that we were gonna convert to islam due to what people at church were saying and they used to talk behind my mother's back.. before converting, we went to so many different churches searching for the right church but never found the one that goes with what we believed in. Anyways, my big sister and big brother started searching about Islam.. To be honest with you, i never wanted to convert at first because what my father and his people used to teach us about Islam and Muslims. But because i love my mom so much, i decided to follow them and convert also. Before converting, my mom told us that we had to tell our dad, so we went to see him after he finished preaching and we all sat down in the cafeteria, i don't even remember how the conversation started but i just remember my mom telling dad that we are converting to Islam...Oh hell broke loose for him lol.. he then started to curse all of us saying that we are not his kids anymore and that he never wanted to see us again. He literally was going to cry because of anger.. He basically said that we were shame to him.. He was shocked and kept asking us one by one if thats what we really wanted.. Then he left.. we never heard from him for about a year or 2..Then suddenly out of nowhere, his friend came to ask my mom if she can forgive my dad cause he really missed us.. Alhamdulillah we are always good to him, he now is not ashamed of taking us out in public. Yes lots of people who knew us never understand and always say that we betrayed my dad and blah blah.. But wha matter is that my dad knows and now he came to accept the fact that we are muslim.

    Alhamdulillah, i always wear my hijab and Abaya.. it wasnt so hard for me to wear the hijab but the hardest was wearing the abaya.. But Alhamdulillah now am used to it soon in shaa Allah i will be going for the niqab since i really love it and would love to wear it :).. Islam is such a beautiful religion and nobody can change the way i feel about Islam, not the media, not my friends and certainly not my dad.

    I also changed my name to Nadia but its not on my documents, i just introduce myself to as Nadia and all my friends call me Nadia :)..In shaa Allah i hope everything goes well for you, take step by step don't rush everything..

    May Allah be with you, protect you and bless you.. May Allah give understanding to you family, Ameen 🙂

  8. I converted in prison 3 1/2 yrs ago and im ready to change from my Christian name to my muslim name

    • As-salamu alaykum Ted. You can choose any name from the Quran, the names of the Prophets, the Sahabah, or any of the heroes of Islam. There are many lists on the internet. This page is a good guide:

      Muslim Names

      Keep in mind that you should change your first name only. The last name (family name) should not be changed, as Islam emphasizes the importance of family ties.

      Wael Editor

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