Divorced her thrice but she did not observe the Iddah; was the Shaikh right to declare her divorced?
We are muslims, with 4 children, I said to my wife in a bad argument, you are divorced in 3 different bad arguments during our 21 years of marriage (was very very mad and said it without thinking about all losts) my attention in this said divorce is that; your bad reply talk - you should be divorced, is like to shock her, we then forgave each others, it happened again this 21 years of marriage, now that we still together and had children during (said divorced), we never stayed away from another as couple and she never did 3 months (eddah) now its said the 4 times -- are we divorced or not ??
In my opinon; QURAN saying: divorce twice and to complete 3 months of eddah in each talaq, is it by said so words (talaq) or action and do the eddah as quran said to complete one talaq.........(not counted divorce if their is no complete 3 months of eddah in my opinon) or can be divorced without eddah ?)
To me is like to say to some one you are (whatever, bad - stupid) does it mean he is ?
I think one divorce is counted when she complete the 3 months eddah period, if it happens twice as quran said and complete the 2nd eddah then she must marry to another man before taking her back.
Also; what if the couple never knew the rules of islamic divorce ? would they be accountable for it ? is it fair for saying divorce while you are mad and your spouce anger and action drove you to say it but realy you don't want to, I think couple should be aware of what they are saying and booth wants and agrees to divorce before it takes place, not by just saying it,,,,,,we misunderstood GOD and his book.
I think talaq by action according to quran with 3 months of eddah is ONE talaq - not just words, other wise what's eddah for if it's not complete ,- then their is NO talaq, if we still married and sleep together (my children are haram during 21 years of marraige so what should I do with them, because she didn't do as GOD said 3 months of eidah during all of 21 years), according to the sheikh, she been divorced and must get out of this marriage, until marry another man,,,,,,,
she was scared doing haram and did what he said and now in my opinion we are divorced because of her doing complete eddah now we are divorced islamicly and in the american way, lost my house, children and others materialistic thing that i don't care about, but what really upsets me is the sheikh told her to get her rights also to file for custody and to have whats right for her in this country, remember sheikh and her agrees that this marriage is HARAM, --- here is my questions:
According to Islami Shareiat; man keep the children above 5-7 years of age, also gets her support during eddah which I have done so, and to leave the husband home after eddah which she didn't do, NOW she is walking away with more than 150.000.00, my children are 20-19-17-13 years of age, and still supporting her because she doesn't work or wants to go back home. is this fair from the sheikh who divorced her without asking my opinion or statement, or at least try to understand the conflect, surly not,-- her family and friends neither mine never got involved in our marrage ( GOD said to do so before talaq) instead sheikh took her statement, and 4 months later I meat with sheikh, he then found out that her statement wasn't truthfuly said, TOO LATE NOW, she believe as sheikh said we are divorced.
Believe me we are happy and would have kept our marriage, but because of sheikh translation of GOD's words we are divorced, is this a fair judgement?
I am not asking her back if she desn't want this marrage, my argument is about talaq by words and not action according to GOD's rules, thank you -------please reply
~ salim8436
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Assalamu'alaikum,
Brother, your post is unclear and confusing. What I have understood is that you divorced your wife thrice but she did not worry about observing the iddah. This makes no difference. If you do not follow the rulings of Islam, it is your bad. But when you have consulted a "Shaikh" then I do not think we are in any position to annul his judgement without having further knowledge.
Observing the Iddah is necessary and a must. But if one does not do so, divorce is not incomplete. If you pronounced divorce once or even thrice during a three month period (meaning without revoking it), that counts one divorce. Even if you take her back before the expiry of the three month iddah, she is divorced once. If you have pronounced divorce on three different occasions and three months had passed after each of these, then your opinion or comment was not required at all.
Allah asked you to bring a person from your side and one from her side to make things work, BEFORE DIVORCE. It is you who did not abide by that and divorced her. She is not to blame here. Even if out of ignorance, you have pained her enough and have shown her enough distress. Allah Said:
And when you have divorced women and they have fulfilled the term of their prescribed period, either take them back on reasonable basis or set them free on reasonable basis. But do not take them back to hurt them, and whoever does that, then he has wronged himself. And treat not the Verses (Laws) of Allah as a jest, but remember Allah's Favours on you (i.e. Islam), and that which He has sent down to you of the Book (i.e. the Qur'an) and Al-Hikmah (the Prophet's Sunnah - legal ways - Islamic jurisprudence, etc.) whereby He instructs you. And fear Allah, and know that Allah is All-Aware of everything. (Baqarah, 231)
If the shaikh encouraged your wife to marry another in order to divorce him and remarry you, it was wrong. This kind of a marriage is haraam.
If your divorce has happened, what remains is the custody issue. I think you should listen to Shaikh Dr. Saleh as Saleh's dars on this issue. Listen to it from here
We do not know the conditions in which the Shaikh allowed your wife to walk away with everything so we can not comment on that. If you still think you were wronged and divorce has not happened, approach another scholar, and explain the issue to him. If he rules the otherwise, explain that to your wife. But if she is divorced, the she is not allowed for you to marry, until she marries another man and he divorces her due to some reason, but not as a contract to make her halal for you.
This comment includes solely my opinion, you are free to take it or leave it. If anything in it is correct, that is from Allah. If wrong, it is from myself and the Shaitaan. May Allah protect us from Shaitaan's evil.
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.cm Editor
Ask an imaam or a scholar for proper advice.
Speak in your own mother tongue when you do.
Good luck
ASSALAMALAIKUM
PL DONT BE DISTURBED WITH THE SHAIKHS[USELESS FELLOW] HE MIGHT HAVE GOT SOME GOOD FEES TO DO THIS......
HER GOING AND OBSERVING IDDAH THIS TIME EQUALS TO 2 TALAQS WHICH IS REVOCABLE BY PERFORMING ANOTHER NIKAH .......TO RETURN HER TO YOUR HOUSE ....
COMMANDENTS IN QURAN ON TALAQ.......
O PROPHET[SALALAHUALAIHIWASALAM]WHEN YOU DIVORCE YOUR WOMEN,DIVORCE THEM IN THEIR WAITING PERIOD, COMPUTE THE WAITING PERIOD ACCURATELY, DO NOT TURN THEM OUT OF THE HOUSES IN THEIR WAITING PERIOD,NOR SHOULD THEY GO AWAY FROM THE THEIR HOMES,UNLESS THEY HAVE COMMITTED ANY MANIFESTLY EVIL DEED,SUCH ARE THE BOUNDS SET BY ALLAH,ANY ONE TRANSGRESSES THESE BOUNDS SET BY ALLAH SHE COMMITS WRONG AGAINST HIMSELF,YOU DO NOT KNOW MAY BE ALLAH WILL CAUSE SOMETHING TO HAPPEN TO PAVE THE WAY FOR RE-CONCILIATION,IF YOU HAVE TO DIVORCE YOUR WIVES YOU SHOULD DIVORCE THEM TILL THE WAITING PERIOD.SURAH TALAQ-65 [AL-QURAN]
WHAT IS WAITING PERIOD-
THE SYSTEM OF SHARIAH TALAQ IS NOT TO BE GIVEN [IN MENSTRUAL PERIOD DAYS]BUT AFTER THE MENSTRUAL PERIOD BEFORE HAVING SEX....
1ST MONTH 1ST TALAQ……
2ND MONTH 2ND TALAQ …...
AND 3RD MONTH 3RD TALAQ TO BE GIVEN IN FRONT OF ARBITRATORS FROM BOTH FAMILIES,BY GIVING AWAY ALL THE JEWELS,CLOTHES ALL THAT WAS GIVEN BY THE GROOM AT THE TIME OF MARRIAGE AND GIFT HER AND RELEASE HER WITH GRACE AND KINDNESS…….
IF THE HUSBAND PROCLAIMS THE 3RD TALAQ [IN THE ABOVE SHARIAH MANNER ]THEN THE WOMAN WILL BECOME HARAM FOR HIM THIS IS CALLED TALAQ-E SHARIATH……
ALLAH REVEALED IN SURAH BAGARA-229]IF A TALAQ IS GIVEN TWO TIMES AS PER THE LAW &;KEEPS HIS WIFE OR SENDS HER BACK TO HER PARENTS & IN THAT CASE IT WILL BE COUNTED AS 2[TWO]TALAQS-AND IF THEY DO NOT RESCUE THEIR RELATIONSHIP THEY CAN RE-MARRY AGAIN BEFORE ISSUING THE 3 RD TALAQ [SURAH BAQARA AYAT [NO232AFATER THE 3RD TALAQ- NO RE-MARRIAGE IS ALLOWED……
THE INTENTION OF THIS VERSE IS FURTHER EXPLAINED IN HADEES NASAI REPORTS HOLY PROPHET SALALAHUALAIHIWASALAM WAS INFORMED A PERSON HAD PRONOUNCED 3[THREE]DIVORCES IN ONE SITTING HE STOOD UP IN ANGER AND SAID"ARE THE PEOPLE PLAYING WITH THE BOOK OF ALLAH EVEN WHEN I AM PRESENT AMONG YOU"SEEING THE EXTREME
ANGER OF PROPHET SALALHU-ALAIHI-WASALAM A PERSON STOOD UP AND SAID SHOULD I GO AND KILL THAT PERSON.
THE COMMANDMENTS OF SHARIAH ARE FOLLOWED BY THE MUSLIMS MILLIONS OF GIRLS CAN BE SAVED FROM RETURNING BACK WITH CHILDREN. .
IF YOU NEED MORE CLARITY ON THIS POINT PLS REPLY-AND ALSO IF POSSIBLE INVOLVE YOUR WIFE IN THE ANSWERS FROM THIS FORUM SO THAT SHE GETS HER MIND STRAIGHT THAT SHE IS NOT DIVORCED-
REGARDS
Wa Alaikum as Salam, Ali Yousuff,
This is not a case of "triple divorce in one sitting". The brother has divorced his wife thrice on different occasions in 21 years of their marriage. At least this is what is evident from his saying:
" I said to my wife in a bad argument, you are divorced in 3 different bad arguments during our 21 years of marriage"
Wallahu A'lam.
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Assalamualaikum
Brother Ali Yousuff
With all due respect, why are you continually insulting the Ulema of Islam and established scholarship? Who are you to do that? It is extremely ignorant of one to bash the many scholars past and present who have dedicated their lives to studying the Deen and to gain and transmit knowledge of Islam.
Please keep your disrespectful comments to yourself, as they are baseless, irrelevant, ignorant, and outright rude and I am very disappointed that the administrators have not said anything to you concerning this.
Warrior, Wa Alaikum as Salam,
I know it was rude, but I ignored that because I thought it was due to a misunderstanding. I presumed that Ali Yousuff considered the "shaikh" in question to have supported a bid'ah.
Over all of this, no name of the shaikh was mentioned, so I did not bother.
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
assalamalikum ,
WITH DUE RESPECT AND HUMBLENESS I REPLY PLS POST THIS REPLY AS IT IS FOR P0EOPLE TO KNOW THE TRUTH.......
Dear Abu bari bhai i want to CLARIFY I AM VERY FRANK AND WHEN THE MATTERS COMES IN FRONT OF ME ABOUT SOME BIDATHI SCHOLARS OF TAQLEED GROUP PLAYING WITH THE LIVES IF INNOCENT UMMAH BY HIS TANTRIKS AND NAUTANKI I WILL BE VERY VERY FRANK IN OBJECTING HIS ACT,
BECAUSE THESE SELF APPOINTED SCHOLARS BREAK THE HOUSES AND SEPERATE PARENTS CHILDREN AND SLEEP PEACEFULLY AT HOME CHARGING ENORMOUS AMMOUNTS LIKE BLOODSUCKERS TO MAKE THEIR PROPERTIES TO SETTLE THEIR WIFES AND CHILDRENS LIVES BY DEVASTATING PUSHING THE DIVORCED FAMILIES-SMALL SMALL CHILDREN IN TO THE WORLD WITH NO PARENTS/NO HOUSE NO SOURCE TO SUPPORT AND THEY FINALLY LAND UP IN DRUGS AND MANY MANY GIRLS FALL PREY TO SOME BOYS IN THE NAME OF SYMPATHY AND LEFT WITHOUT MARRIAGE-
DEAR ABU BARI BAHI I WAS NOT RUDE IT IS JUST ONE WORD I HAVE USED USELESS FELLOW I KNOW HE MIGHT HAVE DONE THIS FOR FEES AND CHARGES NOT FREE OF COST IN 50 YEARS I HAVE SEEN THEM CLOSELY..
COMING TO THE REPLY FOR MR WARRIOR FOR THIS-
With all due respect, why are you continually insulting the Ulema of Islam and established scholarship? Who are you to do that? It is extremely ignorant of one to bash the many scholars past and present who have dedicated their lives to studying the Deen and to gain and transmit knowledge of Islam.
MY-ANSWER....SORRY TO SAY THEY ARE THE GREATEST CULPRITS WHO HAVE WORKED IN THE JURISDICTION OUT OF ISLAM FOR THE SAKE OF DONATIONS AND FAME AND PRAISE OF THE PEOPLE THEY ARE THE ROOT CAUSE OF MANY MANY ILLS IN THE SUB CONTINENT-MUSLIMS LIVES-
DEDICATED TO WHAT TO ISLAM SORRY TO THEIR FORE FATHERS WHO FORMULATED THE TAQLEED-PL NOTE-BEING REWARDED FOR THEIR WORK THEY WILL NOT EVEN BE ABLE TO SEE THE BELOVED PROPHET SALAHAUALAHAIWASLAM AND THEY WILL BE DRAGGED TO HELL-
IN 4OO HIJRI-TAQLEED MEANS KHAUL[WRITTEN BY KHAYAL.IMAGINATION]BY THE IJMA OF INNOVATORS AND FORMULATED MANY MANY THINGS IN THE NAME OF ISLAM-SEE WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THEM-
RasoolAllah [May Allah bless Him and grant Him peace] stated:
"On the Day of Judgement, some people will come to me when I will be standing by Haudh-e-Kauser(Well).
They will be grabbed and taken towards the Hellfire.
I shall say: "These are my people" but in reply I will be told:
"These are the people who introduced innovations after you......
BEFORE COMING TO THE POND ALL OUR LIFE IN THIS WORLD MUST BE RECORDED BY THE ANGELS THAT WE LIVED ON THE MANHAJ OF NABI SALAHUALAHAIWASALAM SAHABAS,
TABAYIN AND TABE TABAYIN AND 4 IMAMS BUT NOT THEIR ASSISTANTS FABRICATED TEACHINGS--NOT LATER GENERATION SELF APPOINTED SCHOLARS WHIMS AND FANCIES-AND OPINIONS[TAQLEED MEAN KHAUL AND KHAUL MEANS TOLD FROM KHAYAL]WITH OUT EVIDENCE FROM QURAN -OR- HADEES-
IN FUTURE PLS DONT TRY TO INTERFER IN MY COMMENTS THAT WILL BE BETTER -
BY THE GRACE OF ALLAH THE EDITORS ARE WELL VERSED ABOUT DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BIDDATHI AND SALFUSALEHEEN FOLLOWING SCHOLARS THEY CAN UNDERSTAND WHEN I REPLY ABOUT A SOME SUBJECT WHY AND HOW THE WORDS REFER TO SOME PARTICULAR STYLE OF SCHOLARS MISCHIEF-
Insulting the Ulema of Islam...SORRY THEY ARE NOT FROM ISLAM THEY ARE FROM THEIR SELF APPOINTED -MASLKHS AND SECTS/POSTS AND STATUS AND THEY ARE WORST CREATURES WHO BURY MANY A HAPPY FAMILY FOR THEIR GAINS-I AM A WITNESS FOR THE SAME-
WHEN THE MATTER OF DIVORCE COMES THEY SEND THEIR RELATIVES TO SALAFI BASED INSTITUTION AND WHEN THE MATTER OF OUTSIDERS COME THEY SIT THERE LIKE WOLVES BREAK THE FAMILY I HAVE SEEN THEM PERSONALLY DOING THIS SO..........
PLS EXCUSE ME MR WARRIOR DONT MAKE MY MOUTH OPEN OR ELSE BE READY TO BECOME SHOCKED WITH MY REPLIES ON THE MISDEEDS OF YOUR SO CALLED- insulting the Ulema of Islam.....
I AM THE FOLLOWER OF THIS -Asalaamualaikum warahmatullah Wa Barakatuhu
SALAFI MEANS PREDECESSOR-Beloved prophet[salalhualaihiwaslalam]AND SAHABAS were neither hanafi nor shafi nor hambali nor maliki-he was a salafi read:-The word "Salaf" was used by the Prophet (sallallaahu alaihi wasallam) himself. He said to FATIMA-
"How excellent a Salaf I am for you." (Muslim, no. 2450).
SORRY IF MY FRANKNESS IS A LITTLE HARD TO DIGEST MR WARRIOR-
REGARDS
ASSALAMALAIKUM ABU ABDUL BARI BHAI-JUST SAW THIS ESTEEMED REPLY OF YOURS....
I said to my wife in a bad argument.....
Narrated Aisha, Ummul Mu'minin: "Muhammad ibn Ubayd ibn AbuSalih who lived in Ayliya said: I went out with Adi ibn Adi al-Kindi till we came to Mecca. He sent me to Safiyyah daughter of Shaybah who remembered a tradition (that she had heard) from Aisha. She said: I heard Aisha say: I heard the Apostle of Allah (peace_be_upon_him) say: There is no divorce or emancipation in case of constraint or duress (ghalaq). (Translation of Sunan Abu-Dawud, Book 12, Divorce (Kitab Al-Talaq), Number 2188)"
THIS ITSELF IS A PROOF THAT THE TALAQ DOES NOT HAVE ANY VALUE IN THE STATE OF ANGER
FOR THIS REASON ONLY ALLAH MENTIONED CLEARLY IN THE QURAN- HE WANTS THIS TO HAPPEN.... You do not know: maybe Allah will cause something to happen to pave the way (for reconciliation)
AND RECONCILIATION HAS HAPPENED WHICH ABOLISHES THE- you are divorced in 3 different bad arguments during our 21 years of marriage"“And live with them in kindness.” (Surah an Nisa:19)
When does the divorce count? What determines the quantity of anger from the husband that would nullify the divorce?
Many debate about the issue on whether an angry husband's divorce counts or not. Allah Almighty made it clear in the Noble Quran that divorces caused by anger do not count! NOW COMING TO QURAN-
Here in these Noble Verses, we clearly see that Allah Almighty doesn't take into account thoughtless oaths. A divorce as clearly shown in the Noble Verses is considered an oath. It is the intentions that He the Almighty cares about.-Anger is certainly something that Allah Almighty doesn't count against us, and He would forgive us for whatever we declare during it. He is the "Oft-forgiving, Most Forbearing."
SILLY STATEMENTS DO NOT MATTER:
2:224 Let not your senseless oaths in the Name of Allah deter you from doing good to others, from being mindful of the Divine Laws, and from making peace between people. Allah is Hearer, Knower.
2:225 Allah will not task you for your senseless swearing. He holds you responsible for your intentional doings. Allah is Forgiving, Clement.
(Therefore, a marriage will not be dissolved for senseless utterances of the husband or the wife).
HOPE THESE POINTS POINT THE TRUTH OF TALAQ-IN THE ABOVE MATTER-THAT SHE IS NOT DIVORCED AND THEY BOTH CAN SAVE THE LIVES OF THEIR CHILDREN WHO HAVE FUTURE IN FRONT OF THEM AND I KNOW WHAT IS FATHER BECAUSE I LOST MY FATHER AT THE AGE OF 4 -
REGARDS
ALI YOUSUFF.
thank you all for your comments; the real question is; when a husband tells his wife you are taleg during a very bad argument and sme day they do nikah and forgave each other, so this happens 3 times in 21 years of marrage, in the fourth time it happend, the wife was told by a sheikh that its haram to stay together and must do 3 months of eidah, no return till she marry another person.
my queation is; will a word of talaq is in force without eidah and witness? according to god words family help and eidah to complete talaq is a must, so if no eidah was done how can this talaq in inforced.
today she completed her 3 months of eidah for the first time in 21 years, can we remary again?
thank you
I am confused if you say talaq to your wife then how can you get married in same day? Doesn't she have to wait 3months?
Brother Salim, things are quite clear now. You mentioned bad arguments. Do you mean you actually divorced her with awareness and actually meant it and were not intensely angry, but later both of you forgave each other? This makes your divorce valid. But if your divorce pronouncement was out of intense anger while you did not mean to divorce actually, that makes divorce invalid. Read the following fataawa for more clarity:
Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked about a man whose wife treats him badly and insults him, so he divorced her at a moment of anger. He replied:
If you uttered the words of divorce at a moment of intense anger and without realizing it, and you could not control yourself, because of her bad words and insults etc., and you did that at a moment of intense anger and without realizing it, and she acknowledges that, or you have a witness of good character, then divorce has not taken place, because the shar’i evidence indicates that divorce does not take place if the words are spoken at a moment of intense anger – and if it is accompanied by not realizing what is happening then the ruling applies even more so.
For example, Ahmad, Abu Dawood and Ibn Maajah narrated from ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no divorce and no manumission in the event of ighlaaq.” The majority of scholars said that ighlaaq means compulsion or anger, i.e., intense anger. For his anger made him unaware of what he was saying, so he is like one who is unconscious, insane or drunk, because of the intensity of his anger. So divorce does not take place in this instance. If he does not realize what he is doing and cannot control his words or actions because of the intensity of his anger, then divorce does not take place.
Anger may be of three types:
1 – When a person is angry and is no longer aware of what he is doing. This is likened to the insane, so divorce does not take place according to all scholars.
2 – Where a person is very angry but is still aware of what is going on, but his anger is so intense that it makes him say the words of divorce. In this case too, divorce does not take place according to the correct scholarly opinion.
3 – The ordinary type of anger which is not very intense. In this case, divorce takes place, according to all the scholars. From Fataawa al-Talaaq, pp. 19-21, compiled by Dr. ‘Abd-Allaah al- Tayyaar and Muhammad al-Moosa.
Imam Ibn al-Qayyim wrote an essay on that entitled Ighaathat al-Lahfaan fi Hukm Talaaq al-Ghadbaan, in which he said the following:
Anger is of three types:
1 – That which is not so intense as to affect a person’s mind or rational thinking; he knows what he is saying and what he means. There is no dispute that in this case divorce, manumission and contracts are valid.
2 – Where his anger reaches such a limit that he no longer knows what he is doing or saying. There is no dispute that in this situation divorce does not take place. If his anger is so intense that he does not know what he is saying, there is no doubt that none of his words should be implemented in this case. The words of the mukallif (adult of sound mind) are only to be implemented if he knows what he is saying and what it means, and if the speaker really means that.
3 – The kind of anger that falls between the two categories mentioned above, where the anger goes beyond the ordinary level but not so far as to make him behave like a madman. This is an area of scholarly differences of opinion. The shar’i evidence indicates that divorce, manumission and contracts in such cases are not valid, and this is a kind of ighlaaq as the imams explained.
From Mataalib Ooli al-Nuha, 5/323; see also Zaad al-Ma’aad, 5/215.
If your divorce was valid, in my personal opinion, not observing iddah does not invalidate it.
I will not say in black or white because I can not bear the sin of separating a couple or that of approving a sinful reunion. The decision is yours and you should approach a higher authority which is a mufti. But make sure the person you go to has sound knowledge.
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
assalamalailikum,
NADIA-
I am confused if you say talaq to your wife then how can you get married in same day?
Doesn't she have to wait 3months?
PL UNDERSTAND THAT SAYING TALAQ MEANS TALAQ DOES NOT HAPPEN-EVEN IF YOU SAY MANY TIMES SEE-
From the accounts of the holy companions and from various Hadiths, it can be fairly established that during the life of the Prophet (pbuh) the practice of Talaq-e-Ahsan (Quranic process of Talaq) was in vogue as the holy Prophet (pbuh) disapproved triple Talaq (Talaq-e- mughallaza). During his life, three or more Talaqs at one go were considered one pronouncement. Here is a Hadith in this context:
“Abd-e-Yazid divorced his wife (mother of Abu Rakanah and his brother) by pronouncing three Talaqs and married a woman of Muzainah tribe. But soon after that Abd Yazid’s second wife went to the holy Prophet (pbuh) and said, “O apostle of God, he (Abd Yazid) is of no use to me like this hair (and she pulled out a hair from her head to suggest he was impotent). The holy Prophet (pbuh) became very angry. He pointed out the resemblances that Rakanah and his brother had to their father. (How could Abd Yazid be impotent then?). The prophet (pbuh) then commanded Abd Yazid, “Divorce her”. He obeyed. The prophet (pbuh) then said to Abd Yazid, “Take your wife (mother of Rakana and his brother) back in marriage.” Abd Yazid said, “I have divorced her by three pronouncements”. The holy Prophet said, “I know; take her back”, and recalled the verse in the Quran, “O Prophet, when you divorce women, divorce them at their appointed periods.” (Sunan Abu Dawood vol 2 Hadith no. 2191 p 59; Ahmad ibn Hanbal, Musnad)
This incident is also reported in Musnad Ahmad Ibn Hanbal that once Rakanah pronounced three divorces against his wife but later he was very sorry for it. When the Prophet (pbuh) asked him, ‘How did you divorce your wife?’ Rakanah replied that he had pronounced three divorces. The Prophet asked, Did you pronounce it in one sitting? When he said, yes, the noble Prophet said, Treat it as one divorce only and if you want you can take your wife back. And Rukanah took his wife back.
The above quoted Hadiths show that since Abd Yazid had pronounced three Talaqs together, the Nikah had not broken as it was considered only one Talaq and so the prophet (pbuh) asked Abd Yazid to take his wife back.
NO ROOM FOR INSTANT DIVORCE:
According to the Qur'an, there is absolutely no room for an instant divorce. The process must take months in order to allow reconsideration on the part of the husband and wife.
THE QUR'AN DISREGARDED: It is highly unfortunate and shameful that Muslim jurists have been ignoring and practically revoking these clear verses of the Book of Allah for centuries, in favor of their own conjecture. According to their exploitative and erroneous edicts, if a husband utters the word "Divorce" three times in anger or under any kind of duress or even in a stage drama or movie, divorce takes effect instantly. What a mockery of the Qur'an! They are then declared unlawful for each other. ANYONE EATING OR DRINKING IN THEIR HOME COMMITS HARAM!......
THE SOMERSAULT: It is interesting to note that the so called "Fuqaha" (Jurists and Mullahs) who otherwise uphold Hadith in preference to the Word of Allah, conveniently disregard even their 'treasure' whenever it suits their whims or purpose. (They even 'abrogate' the Qur'anic verses against Hadith!)
HADITH IGNORED: In this instance, there is a Hadith in Ibn Majah. The exalted Prophet is reported to have said, "La talaqa fil Ighlaq" = There is absolutely no divorce under any kind of duress, coercion, suddenness, anger etc. This Hadith which is in total harmony with the Qur'an remains obscure or redundant to the "Ulema".
UPHOLD THE QUR'AN: Incidentally there is another beautiful Hadith that strikes a cord with 65:2. The exalted Prophet is reported to have said, "For you O people! Just this verse of the Qur'an could be sufficient. Anyone who is mindful of Allah, He will always grant a way out for him (from difficult situations).
ARBITERS: Three months of attempts to affect reconciliation by arbiters is one of the pre-requisites for divorce.
ATTEMPTS AT RECONCILIATION:
4:35 (Families and communities must adopt a proactive approach regarding a husband and a wife in discord). If you fear a breach between a husband and wife, appoint two arbiters, one from his family and one from her family. If they decide to reconcile, Allah will help them get together. Verily, Allah is Knower, Aware. (2:228-234, 4:3, 4:19, 4:35, 4:128, 33:49, 58:1 65:1-4).
HOPE NOW YOU WILL NOT TYPE HERE THE ABOVE EXAMPLE OF [YOUR] CONFUSIONS IN FUTURE-
REGARDS
ALI YOUSUFF-
ASSSALAMALAIKUM-
ABDUL BARI BHAI,
Brother Salim, things are quite clear now. You mentioned bad arguments. Do you mean you actually divorced her with awareness and actually meant it and were not intensely angry, but later both of you forgave each other? This makes your divorce valid.
EVEN IF YOU SAY THE WORD VALID -THAT IS ONLY ONE DIVORCE DEAR BROTHER-NOT COMPLETE DIVORCE-
WITHOUT FOLLOWING THE QURANIC INJUCTIONS THE MATTER OF TALAQ CANNOT BECOME VALID - I REPEAT THE SAME AGAIN FOR REFERENCE-
STEP -1-[65:1] O you prophet, when you people divorce the women, you shall ensure that a divorce interim is fulfilled. You shall measure such an interim precisely. You shall reverence GOD your Lord. Do not evict them from their homes, nor shall you make life miserable for them, to force them to leave on their own, unless they commit a proven adultery. These are GOD's laws. Anyone who transgresses GOD's laws commits an injustice against himself. You never know; maybe GOD wills something good to come out of this.
STEP 2-
[2:231] If you divorce the women, once they fulfill their interim (three menstruations), you shall allow them to live in the same home amicably, or let them leave amicably.Do not force them to stay against their will, as a revenge. Anyone who does this wrongs his own soul. Do not take GOD's revelations in vain. Remember GOD's blessings upon you, and that He sent down to you the scripture and wisdom to enlighten you. You shall observe GOD, and know that GOD is aware of all things.
STEP-3
WHAT IS WAITING PERIOD-
THE SYSTEM OF SHARIAH TALAQ IS NOT TO BE GIVEN [IN MENSTRUAL PERIOD DAYS]BUT AFTER THE MENSTRUAL PERIOD BEFORE HAVING SEX....
1ST MONTH 1ST TALAQ……
IF BOTH AFTER EXCUSING EACH OTHER JOIN IN SEX THEN THE 1ST TALAQ ITSELF BECOMES INVALID.
2ND MONTH 2ND TALAQ …...
AND 3RD MONTH 3RD TALAQ TO BE GIVEN IN FRONT OF ARBITRATORS FROM BOTH FAMILIES,BY GIVING AWAY ALL THE JEWELS,CLOTHES ALL THAT WAS GIVEN BY THE GROOM AT THE TIME OF MARRIAGE AND GIFT HER AND RELEASE HER WITH GRACE AND KINDNESS…….
IF THE HUSBAND PROCLAIMS THE 3RD TALAQ [IN THE ABOVE SHARIAH MANNER ]THEN THE WOMAN WILL BECOME HARAM FOR HIM THIS IS CALLED TALAQ-E SHARIATH……
ALLAH REVEALED IN SURAH BAGARA-229]
IF A TALAQ IS GIVEN TWO TIMES AS PER THE LAW &KEEPS HIS WIFE OR SENDS HER BACK TO HER PARENTS & IN THAT CASE IT WILL BE COUNTED AS 2[TWO]TALAQS-AND IF THE WANT TO RESCUE THEIR RELATIONSHIP THEY CAN RE-MARRY AGAIN
BEFORE ISSUING THE 3 RD TALAQ [SURAH BAQARA AYAT [NO232
AFATER THE 3RD TALAQ- NO RE-MARRIAGE IS ALLOWED……
THE INTENTION OF THIS VERSE IS FURTHER EXPLAINED IN HADEES NASAI REPORTS HOLY PROPHET SALALAHUALAIHIWASALAM WAS INFORMED A PERSON HAD PRONOUNCED 3[THREE]DIVORCES IN ONE SITTING HE STOOD UP IN ANGER AND SAID"ARE THE PEOPLE PLAYING WITH THE BOOK OF ALLAH EVEN WHEN I AM PRESENT AMONG YOU"SEEING THE EXTREME
ANGER OF PROPHET SALALHU-ALAIHI-WASALAM A PERSON STOOD UP AND SAID SHOULD I GO AND KILL THAT PERSON.
AND YOUR ADVICE IS GOOD HERE .....
The decision is yours and you should approach a higher authority which is a mufti. But make sure the person you go to has sound knowledge.AGAIN IF HE GOES TO SOME DEVAINT SECT SCHOLAR WHO FOLLOWS SOME MASLAKH OTHER THAN NABI SALAHUALAHAIWASALAMS [MEANING THE QURAN AND SUNNAH REFERENCE-
OR ELSE HE WILL LAND UP WITH ANOTHER MUFTHI GIVING HIS OPINION WHICH IS MORE HARMFUL. MORE CONFUSING-FOR MR SALEEM.......
REGARDS
ALI YOUSUFF
Alright! So instead of asking him to go to "someone", give him a reference of a sound scholar in the west or you ask a sound scholar from your city and quote the fatwa to brother Salim, instead of giving a fatwa by yourself.
@Brother Salim, can you confirm which languages you speak and understand, so that we can refer you to a scholar?
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
ASSALAMALAIKUM
DEAR BROTHER ABDUL BARI BHAI.
ITS GOOD WE CAN SORT OUT HIS MATTER WITH RIGHT DIRECTION FROM RIGHT SOURCE-
PL TELL HIM TO WRITE ONE PAGE WITH POINTS 1 -2 ND 3 ETC.
1ST WHAT HE DID AND WHEN -I MEAN TALAQ MOVE AND ALSO HIS WIFE SHOULD EXPLAIN WE MUST GIVE THIS REPORT TO A SALAFI SCHOLAR WHO WILL ONLY REFER QURAN AND HADEES MINUS SCHOOLS OF THOUGHT-
THE SCHOLAR I KNOW GAVE THE REPLY FOR ANOTHER CASE WHICH SAME LIKE THIS -
I HAVE IT WITH ME I THAT COPY IN URDU LANGUAGE I GOT IT TRANSLATED TO ENGLISH AND THEN SENT IN THESE REPLIES....
FROM WHICH I QUOTED QURAN- 65-VERSE AND THE EXPLANATION OF THE SAME
THE 3 STAGES OF WAITING PERIOD ........
BOTH HUSBAND AND WIFE EXPLAINING NOW IS THE RIGHT WAY OF REACHING THE TRUTH-
HE WILL ASK THE HUSBANDS REPORT AND WIFES REPORT SO THAT HE WILL KNOW SITUATION AS OF TODAY.
HOPE TO HEAR FROM SALIM BHAI WITH SIMPLE A SHORT REPORTS[BOTH HIS AND HIS WIFES]
MAY ALLAH SHOW HIM THE RIGHT WAY-
REGARDS
ALI YOUSUFF.
Brother Salim;
I have emailed you the contct numbers of Shaikh Dr. Waseeullah al Abbas, mufti of Haram in Makkah and Shaikh Murtaza of Jeddah.
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Assalam O Alaikum Brother Abu Abdul Bari!
I also need the contact number of Shaikh Dr. Waseeullah al Abbas, mufti of Haram in Makkah and Shaikh Murtaza of Jeddah.
Please email me.
Jazak Allah
Regards Muaaz Khalid Mustafvi
Wa Alaikum as Salam brother,
I will email, in sha Allah.
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
assalamalaikum
Abu Abdul Bari
pl mail me also the numbers and contqct detials so that in future i may take some guidence=
Shaikh Dr. Waseeullah al Abbas, mufti of Haram in Makkah and Shaikh Murtaza of Jeddah.
regards
ali yousuff
A.a igot separated from my husband one year I insisted he divorce me so 1year down the line he accepted to divorce me khulaa I pay back the dowry so am I supposed to observe eddah even after being apart for 1year? ???
as salam alaekum, I also need a quick response to Khadija Mohd question bcos I am also facing similar issues. my husband does not use to travel back home like 4, 5 etc months rather staying with d 1st wife bcos I am d 2nd wife, giving the excuse that no money both for his travelling down and feeding of my myself and my kids.