Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Can I pray namaaz hajaat to ask Allah for this guy?

Hands raised in dua

O you who believe: Fear Allah as He should be feared and do not die except as Muslims. Hold fast, all of you, to the Rope of Allah and do not be divided, and remember Allah's blessing upon you, for you were enemies and he brought your hearts together until you became brothers by His blessing, and you were on the edge of a pit of fire and He saved you from it. In this way, Allah clarifies His signs to you that you be guided. (Quran 3 102-103)

I have known a guy from past 13 years. We both wanted to get married but his parents were against this marriage due to certain reasons. After one year they agreed and said that they would first like to get istekhara done so they got it done from a maulvi. He did for 3 days and it came out negative.

Now we both dont talk to each other and he has said he wont go against the istekhara and wont do it again and he says if Allah wants us to be together so He will make ways for us Himself.

I still pray to Allah and read Quran 3 to 4 times a day and even praying tahjud namaz everyday and ask Allah to please make ways for us to be together and do taubha for every sin I did because I believe that istekhara is not about dreams as mostly people think.

I think if Allah really does not want me to be with him so He will give much better than him and make me satisfied but till then i want to pray with my whole heart for him and me to be together.

My question to you guys is that is it ok to pray namaz e haajat in such a situation or not??


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11 Responses »

  1. Assalaamu alaikum sister Maha.
    Sorry to hear about these difficulties. I do not know exactly about namaaz e hajaat and the authenticy. Some scholars say the hadith regarding it is weak, others say not. Allah swt knows best. So I will answer your question can I do dua to ask for this guy. You cannot make dua for anything bad or against islam - so strictly speaking asking for him as a husband is ok.

    But I recommend that rather than asking for this guy - ask Allah swt to give you the best spouse for you. Ask Him that if this brother is good for me, then guide me towards marriage with him and if he is bad for me keep him away from me, and remove the love we have for each other in our hearts. And make me pleased with your decision. This is especially beautiful - as you are leaving it in Allah swt hands. He knows best. You may love this guy, but you dont know if you will be happy with him or not. Allah swt knows this. InshaAllah this will give you some peace in your heart.

    Do istikhaarah properly yourself a well. Others should not do it for us. Please see above links at top of page on istikhaarah. You are right that it is not about dreams -its asking for Allahs guidance on an important matter. It may be a good feeling or obstacles.

    Also if you keep doing dua for this guy - you are emotionally clinging to him. It is better to avoid asking for him and allow yourself to emotionally detach. Work on your relationship with Allah - pray your salat for Him. Ask him for happiness in this life and happiness in the next. Allow yourself to grow as a person.

    I pray that Allah swt grants you the best spouse for you.

    Sara Editor

  2. salaam... i would like to know the best way to perform namaaz e haajat.... can anyone help me............and also something that i can read like a wazaif or somthing to improve my relationship with my husband ..... jazak allah....... .....

    • Hajira, please log in and write your question as a separate post, and we'll get to you in turn InshaAllah. My quick advice would be to make dua' to Allah to improve your marriage; and then do your own part by communicating with your husband and doing your best to work out your problems.

      Wael Editor

  3. hi i would also like to know about how to perform namaaz e haajat. please tell me exactly how to perform it. jazakhallah.

  4. He loved me since 8 months but suddenly he is saying that he cant marry me for the sake of his parents. I dontknow what to do and he himself doesntknow what to do. Pls help me

  5. i have known this guy for 3 years, since i was 16 now i am 19.

    (Remainder of comment has been deleted. Please log in and write your question as a separate post, and we will publish it in turn, Insha'Allah. Meanwhile, my advice to you is to go with your parents to the boy's house, and visit his parents. Dress very modestly, take a gift (like a cake or something), and let them see that you are a good person. Maybe they will change their minds. - Wael, Editor).

  6. I love someone.
    he loved me too
    but now he changed totally
    i reallt want him back
    i want to perfom namaz e hajat
    Can i ??

  7. I love a boy he also love me...

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