Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Father rejects my choice for marriage


Assalam o Alaikum My name is Hassan. I love my cousin since I was childhood and now I am 24 years old. 2015 June my father asked me your study will complete soon so I will engage you if you are looking someone.

I replied yes I want to marriage with my mother's elder sister's daughter. But father rejected because she belong to poor family and belong to maternal family.

I requested him but father started bad words and physically torturing to me and forced to checked my mobile phone data and laptop data. I was really wondered why he did?? Once father kicked me out from a house at midnight. my mother was very cried on that day.

In Pakistani culture marriage will never done until boy of family go to girl of family to request for their engagement. The problem still continues. I cant take any action because if I do my father will call her family and abuse them. My father discriminates against the poor family that's why.

Once Dr. Zakir Naik came to Japan I was successfully asked him the same question in a summary. here is URL  ↓

My question was started from 32minutes and 30seconds. please watch it if you have a time.

Please anybody give me a better suggestions. I will also corporate with you.


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3 Responses »

  1. Assalaamualaikam

    What are the reasons for wanting to marry your cousin? Build up a case for why she's a good match for you, thinking about her deen, her character, and addressing concerns your father might have. Having a reasoned argument supporting your choice will inshaAllah put you in a better position.

    Think about what kind of relationship you and your cousin have had - have you maintained appropriate limits and interacted in halal ways? Your father may have additional worries if he thinks you've been engaging in inappropriate activities.

    Try speaking with your parents again, and if need be ask an imam or other respected member of the community to speak with them. InshaAllah, if the objections raised don't have an Islamic basis, someone else may be able to challenge them as well.

    Ultimately, a man does not need the permission of his parents to make a proposal or to marry. So, if you are truly determined, your father's opposition isn't a total barrier, although it may mean there are additional consequences to your decision.

    Before making a decision, pray istikhara and ask for guidance.

    Midnightmoon editor

  2. Assalaamualaikam,,,

    I am Mohammad Raffi basically I have born in Hindu family and i have inspired of Islam without forcing anybody i said "Shahada" and following Islam past 6 years. After few years i love a Islamic girl. Now i want to marry that girl but her parents are not accepting and they arranging for her marriage without proper acceptance from her. Even i spoke them but they told we cant accept but i follow Islam truly kindly guide me to get marry her with parents acceptance.

    • It's very unfortunate that some parents have these kinds of biases. If their only reason for rejecting you is because you used to be Hindu - and not because of finances or some other reason - then they are wrong. Perhaps you can bring an Imam or learned individual to talk to them and try to convince them.

      Wael Editor

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