Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Father showing injustice to children – what can the son do?

empty wallet, poor

We are 3 children of the same father & mother. My father who is still alive is giving away majority of his properties to my brother and sister who all are having the same opinion that myself should be given only less than them as my wife is a working woman (!!) and I have only 2 children.(My brother has 3 !!)
Some of the properties are being transferred to my brother’s son also. According to Islamic sharia, is there any way that I can fight against this injustice or should I leave it to Allah ? Would I be at fault according to Islam , if I file a legal case against this as it would be against my own father ? would I be at fault of severing blood relation with my brother and sister for this issue ?


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12 Responses »

  1. Assalamualaikom Brother Hamdan

    Injustice is bitter indeed. May Allah give you patience and compensate you.

    Never file a case against your father or family members over money that will not cause you to die of hunger if you don't get it. Instead just make duaa that Allah compensate you, and help you to uphold the ties of kinship with your father and siblings as He commanded no matter what they did to you. Upholding the ties of kinship is the key to attaining the pleasure of Allah, and winning His support. A man came to the prophet of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), complaining about his relatives saying “I have relatives with whom I try to keep in touch, but they cut me off. I treat them well, but they abuse me. I am patient and kind towards them, but they insult me.” The Prophet (PUH) told him that " Allaah will continue to support you as long as you continue to do that.” (Muslim 16/115)

    Remember that the real provider is NOT your father.
    Allah is the one who provide for you and for all your family members and he sees what injustice is being done to you. So leave it to Allah and you will inshaaallah get way better than the little money given to your other siblings.

    May Allah compensate you for what you have lost and provide you with abundance for your patience and efforts to uphold the ties of your kinship

    The Messenger of Allaah (PBUH) said: “Whoever would like his rizq (provision) to be increased and his life to be extended, should uphold the ties of kinship.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 5986 and Muslim, 2557)

  2. Assalaamualaikam

    I agree that it is important to maintain ties of kinship - so don't be hasty to rush into any action that would jeopardise these.

    When someone does something which on the surface appears unfair, it can sometimes help to consider why they might be doing it. There might be a reason which you haven't seen, this might be his way of trying to be fair. If you and your wife are managing ok financially but your siblings are less successful at this, then this could be his way of trying to ensure equal support for his grandchildren?

    You don't mention whether or not your father is in good health mentally and physically. Why is he distributing his property now - has something happened? If there is a reason for this to be happening now, understanding that might help you understand why he's dividing things the way he is.

    There is another aspect which you might need to consider if your father's actions still do not make sense to you - are these decisions his own, or is he being influenced in some way? If someone is not well or feels under pressure, they might make decisions that they wouldn't normally make. For example, if your father lives in a country with a high inheritance tax, he might feel that he needs to rush the process of giving things to his family while he is still alive, so that his family is able to actually receive the inheritance. If he is unwell and it is impacting on his decision-making, then it would be better for him to delay distributing things until he has recovered sufficiently. If you are concerned about this, it might be worth speaking with your siblings about your concerns that your father may not be in the best state of mind to be making these decisions - inshaAllah you can then all work together to help your father.

    Ultimately, though, it's your father's property and it's up to him how he wishes to distribute it. Don't let yourself feel bitter about not receiving things which were never yours to begin with. Instead, enjoy the time you have left with your father and enjoy the bonds you have with your siblings. These are far more important than money and no amount of money or property can ever replace them.

    Midnightmoon editor

    • There is no excuse for a father to distribute his wealth un-Islamically to his children.

      It is HARAM and Allah (SWT) has forbade it strictly; regardless of weather the other two siblings are not well off.
      The daughter is not allowed to get more wealth than her brothers.

      • It is not Haram and Allah did not forbade it strictly.

        Please show proof.

        I think what you are talking about is inheritance that happens after the father's death, But as long as the father is alive it is his decision to give whatever he wants to anyone.

        • On the same note, then an unmarried man/woman can commit zina (adultery) bcoz it is their life and they have the right to do anything. Why there is punishment 100 flogs for committing zina ?? Please give me answer.

  3. Inshallah you get the finances you are entitled to. My son is 9 weeks old, and everything he has is from my hard work. I worked 6 days a week as a nurse until I was 37 weeks pregnant to support him. And because of the expenses of raising a baby, I'm going to have to return back to work very soon. All fathers are financially responsible for their children under the Islamic expectations of a parent. What his done is wrong. May your father realise this.

  4. Salaam Brother,

    I can understand your feeling of injustice given to you by your father. But please be patient. You will get the rizq what is supposed to reach you. You will get what Allah had willed for you to receive from the property, etc. So think of it as your getting what Allah has willed, not what your father has willed. If Allah had willed you would have got whole of his property but you are getting what is written for you. It may seem very unfair but have tawakkul in Allah and He will provide you from sources you never imagined.

    Like others have said over here, do not break the ties of kinship. Keep no hard feelings in your heart. Accept graciously what you are receiving and be kind to your parents and siblings. Do it for the sake of Allah.

    Also, you have to keep in mind that as long as your father is alive (May Allah give him a long and healthy life) it is his decision to distribute in whichever way he wants. Islamic rules regarding property distribution applies only after the father has passed away.

    May Allah grant you more Rizq.

    • Can u give me proof of the last para you mentioned. In which Aayah of the Quran its written that a father can distribute his wealth whichever way he wants ?? Have u read the Quran or just giving fatwa by your own. Before replying please do read Surah Baqarah Aayah 180-183. Allah Hafiz.

  5. I realize from the perspective that your father is handing out gifts and you haven't gotten one that this is unfair. But according to what you're saying, you are the most well off financially among your siblings so I can't say he's picking favorites. If he was handing out gifts to someone else besides your siblings then perhaps this would've applied:
    The Prophet is more worthy of the believers than themselves, and his wives are [in the position of] their mothers. And those of [blood] relationship are more entitled [to inheritance] in the decree of Allah than the [other] believers and the emigrants, except that you may do to your close associates a kindness [through bequest]. That was in the Book inscribed.

    But he is giving to blood relations, and this is a gift. I don't think you can sue your father for gifting someone else and not gifting to you. I recommend thinking well of your brother and sister and being happy that they have received something. I recommend thinking well of your father for being giving and giving to those whom you love. Those properties are not yours, they never were, I don't think you can come up with a right to them. So I recommend not mourning the loss of something that was never yours and harboring resentment towards your father. I recommend being grateful for what you have, it's going to be difficult to not get jealous, and this seems to be a trial for you. I hope you get through this well.

  6. Assalamualikum,

    Let me do the simple calculation, since you were born until u are able to stand on your own feet, he did his responsibilities, and you owe him an unlimited debt which able to bring you to heaven if you become a devoted son. So, what's your right to tell your father how to manage his own wealth if you still owe him a big responsibility while he still have full rights towards you? It will be a different story if your father pass away without any will. Then everything shall be shared equally, and you have right over it. Be patience brother, Allah will give you more and more if you become the generous one... InsyaAllah... Allah never sleep.

    • Aoa

      Let me clear you all that he mentioned his problem and asked what our islam guides us in such a matter. I will support Huda because it is clealy mentioned no matter what it is not permisable to do injustice among children. Favourtism is haraam which csn lead to many other problems.
      1. Hatred between sibblings and
      2. inappropraite attitude towards parents.

      Refer to this link

      People who gets importance will always say giving more to gift to one child is in the power of oarents but its not true.

      I will just suggest one thing to you, yes he is doing wrong to you even if you are more financially strong he cant do that without your consent but leave this matter on Allah he will give you more and dont file a case because it will go against you and your family have a reason to justify their action to the world that this is the reason i didnt give him anything. They will never accept what made you do that. So brother have faith in Allah he will do justice with you.

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