IslamicAnswers.com: Islamic Advice

I was with a girl for 9 months I loved her but I didn't tell her I loved her because I knew my family wouldn't accept her so I used to lie to her and tell her I just liked her but she's used to tell me she was in love with me.

my father passed away while I was with this girl and me not thinking straight I cheated on her with another girl and she found out and we broke up and stopped talking.

a few weeks later I really started missing this girl. I thought about her ever day every night and it just ruined me so I told my self I need to tell my family about her and convince my family to let me marry this girl.

it took me 3 months to convince my family and the 3 months away from her just felt like hell so just recently I got in contact with the girl. I told her everything about my family saying yes about our marriage and how much I love her and care for her and soo on she used to tell me come back to me when you can marry me so I did.

I poured my heart out to her in this message and she replied saying she has moved on and she is happy with someone else. she has been with the guy for 3 months. I think she started talking to the guy like a week after we split up and she says she in love with him now and that she never loved me and how horrible I was and so on but I think she is just saying these things because she wants me to move on but I can't I don't know how to.

I love her so much. every time I pray after every prayer I make dua for her, I give charity in her name, I do dua for her in the next life, everything and I know if she gave me another chance things would go back to how they were but she is choosing not to and I don't know what to do.

she has blocked me of everything and I don't want to harras her I don't want her to feel unhappy or sad in any way. I love her and out of repeat for her I don't want to contact her. she told me to stay away from her and I told her I'd wait for her!

So now I'm still waiting. I pour my heart out to Allah swt every day and night and it's drivin Me crazy I really want to go from this Dunya i know I can't really commit suicide because it is haram but I do dua to Allah swt that he takes me from this Dunya , the mad thing is I still have hope. I wake up everyday I think she will be back she will come back to me Allah will bring her to me. I think this everyday then I lose hope like she's gone. I don't know what to do. I need anyone's and everyone's advice .

and I'm thinking of going ummrah as soon as possible IA maybe that will help me

thank you

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