Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Feeling attraction toward my teacher

Stressed college student

A.o.a guyz alhumdillah Allah has saved me from many big problem i had never even touch any girl in my entire life alhumduillah but i love someone but we never meet ...we talk with each other on sms,whatsapp ....but then Allah blessed me with his guidence so i left her humbly (1 year has been passed).. n promise my self that ill never see any girl again...and nowww i am doing 1 year alim course in madarsa and also studying in institute doing BS ...

My age is 20yrs mashaAllah ..

My teacher is a female teacher she is very young may be 24-25 but in start i don't like her ... She make joke laught with us she is very friendly teacher ..she help me and really do what ever i say to her because i study hard n my progress is better than other student alhumduillah .. like if i say to her that please today start this topic so she do that ... recently i start thinking about her i can't control my feelings. i can't lower my gaze cox she is my teacher i need to communicate with her everytime ...that why its hard to lower my gaze but i try my level best .. she is not very beautiful but i don't know why i start liking her .. i pray 4 times prayers and having beard ... please save me i tried to change my teacher but i failed i have no other option ..

islamic question

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3 Responses »

  1. Dear brother in Islam,

    What you feel for your teacher is an attraction based on your familiarity to her. You see her quite often and feel like you are getting to know her as a person and feel attracted to her.

    This is what happens between colleagues who see each other a lot. Feeling like this is to be expected in this situation. You may not be able to control how you feel, but if you are certain that you can continue to behave appropriately with her then there is no blame in remaining in this programme of study.

    To manage your feelings you could try some practices from meditation. When you notice how you feel about her, allow the feelings to come and go without engaging with them. Don't judge these feelings as good or bad. Instead bring your attention to your breath. Breathe in and out until those feelings pass.

    If you fear you may behave inappropriately with or around her, or with someone else as a result of being around her, you may want to consider leaving this course altogether for the sake of Allah swt.

    I pray Allah swt guides you through this difficult time and keeps you strong.

  2. Simple answer brother change to a male teacher. If you do not find any male teacher stop studying for the sake of Allah. Definitely Allah will give you much better than this.

    I can remember similar thing happened in my life. I did the same. That is 12 years before. Alhamdhulillah i did not lose anything.

  3. Salam

    Please make arrangements to send a proposal to this teacher. If you like her that much maybe it would be best to see if she's interested as well. Now, if the proposal doesn't go well then you can switch teachers or do something else. Salam.

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