Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Having a child in second marriage

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My wife died on october 2015 and in december 2015 i married again. i have a son (20 years) and a daughter (15 years) . now they don't want me to have another baby. but according to islam is it fine if i don't take a baby??? i want to but they completely disagree with that! so what should i do? is it fine if i don't take a baby to keep them happy?

fahim

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4 Responses »

  1. Assalaamualaikam

    Let me start by saying I'm sorry to hear of your first wife's death. May Allah grant her His Mercy and a place in Jannah, inshaAllah.

    Your children may be struggling, not just with the death of their mother, but with your remarriage so soon after her death. I'm not saying that you shouldn't have got married again - I don't know the circumstances and it is your right to try to find happiness again - but it's important to consider how they may be feeling and thinking right now.

    It's possible that on some level (perhaps even subconsciously) they feel that just as their mother has been "replaced" (even though this is not what has really happened, children often feel this way after a parent remarries), another child could "replace" them (causing them to lose their father as well as their mother), and so they express opposition to the idea of another child - potentially without being aware of why.

    I'd suggest that you spend some time focusing on the family you have and helping everyone heal and come together to form a stable family unit. Reassure your children that their mother remains part of your lives by discussing her and remembering her together - and reassure them that they are irreplaceable. Depending on how your children feel, they might want to contact a bereavement support service either through their local mosque or their GP/family doctor.

    InshaAllah, they may well come to see another child as a further blessing for the family. Just give them time and make dua for them.

    Midnightmoon
    IslamicAnswers.com editor

  2. Oh wow, may Allah grant her paradise. I think it's the fact you got married so quickly. That's sad, what was your reasoning for getting married so quickly? It's okay to have another child but I think you should wait a wait until your kids have mourned the loss of their mother completely.

  3. Aslamualaikum,

    I am really sorry to hear about your first wife, May ALLAH bless her soul with peace in Jannah,

    Not having more babies may not be sin and you can do that but what do you think about the feelings of your second wife about having babies, She has all rights on you and you have to fulfill them if she want to to have babies then you must have. You can convince your children to be agree with that.

  4. Wow you must of been in hurry to get married....You don't realize the kids lost there mom....??? And now u hot married and you want a baby....I guess you don't have feelings and understand them.Iman must be checked because the true Iman would have been in checked and give you that peace of mind and intelligence. ..These your babies love them

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