Having a Crush
How do I stop these feelings?
I'm a teen and it's my dating ages but I know it is very wrong. I like someone and he likes me back. I don't know how to get rid of the feelings and urge. Please help me. Every time I think about it I feel horrible and guilty. I am breaking not only my parents trust but Allah's trust. How do I stop myself?
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if u really wanna get rid of this feeling, how could dat boy can help u.. any suggestions. .. coz I hav a same situation, a teen girl from my town hav crush on me, its been months, in earlie times, she was very shy. now she hav the gut to look at me, I hav no feelings for her. but when she in front of me, I get to b shy, and smile. she may think I too like her. but definitely not. so how can I avoid her without break her heart.
iam 11 years old...
As-salamu alaykum sister. I published your question as a separate post here:
https://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/i-am-11-and-have-a-crush/
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Just tell her you see her as a "sister" and have no romantic feelings for her.
Assalaamualaikam
While having these feelings might feel distressing and confusing, having feelings in itself isn't breaking trust. What matters is how you act in response to them. Make sure that you observe Islamic limits - avoid 1:1 contact with non-mahram guys, make sure any contact you do have with guys is related to studying and is within limits. Spend time with other pious sisters, so that you have plenty of people in your life who will help you stay on the straight path.
If the guy likes you back, make it clear to him that you cannot go against Islamic principles. If the two of you are of an age where you can legally marry (eg. 16 in the UK, 18 in some US states), then he could approach your father with a proposal (which you and your father could then consider).
Remember that whatever we give up for the sake of Allah, He will reward us with something that is even better for us. Keep to His guidance - He is All-Knowing, and has a plan for each of us.
Midnightmoon
IslamicAnswers.com editor