Islamic marriage advice and family advice

He won’t propose marriage, says to depend on fate

Fate and destiny

Fate or choice?

Assalamualaikum! I would b happy if you would help me through this situation inshaAllah!

I am in relation with a guy 3 years elder to me for 17 months now (we were only talking on phone till this time). Now he is refusing to marry since he is unable to tell it to his parents due to lack of confidence and embarrassment.

He finds no compatibility between us and wants to leave it to Allah now. He says it is out of his hands and we should depend on fate.

Please can u suggest me my next step in this situation, as i feel guilty accepting him in my life now.


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9 Responses »

  1. First of all,this is not jaiz in islam for relationship before to marriage.Now if he used you forT hree years and not confident to his PARENT FOR this marriage..This is not a way that after having used you and leave on fate.its totally wrong.Now its up to you how you can handle this situation.if he in contact by phone and advise him to must fullfill the use of loyalty..If you feel this will create family problem if forcefully married then there no way to take care of you.pls dontdisapoint if not seetle this problem then i accept you without any hasitation.ill mary you and dont hopeless this universe the people use for their leidure and shamesless about thier xharacter and leaAVE THEM ALONE.VERY WRONG.tHEY DONT KNOW ABOUT MOTHERS,SISTERS AND DOUGHTER RESPECT.ANY HOW FORGET HIM AND CONTACT ME.YOU WILL FORGET THE PAST.

  2. Salam alilkum Sister.. There is nothing in this life worth to Disobedience to Allah.. When u leave him for Allah sake then Allah will reward you for the best.. Sorry to say this is not real man .. Real man can do what he wants not make u silly excuses ..

  3. dear sister he is just passing time with you and thats sad

  4. I'm going to get straight to the point. He doesn't see you as a wife. He says you are incompatiable with him. Do you know the definition of incompatiable? It means not a good match the opposite of. He was telling you he doesn't want to marry you. You should find a man that is crazy about you and marry him.. I'm sorry sister but you need to not talk to him anymore complete waste of time.

  5. Asalam O Alaikum,

    Sister, i know you love him. But he does not love you back. You are just a timepass for him. May be he had developed some feelings for you but they are just for a time being cuz he does not see you as his wife. Leave him as fast as you can before he leaves you and makes your life miserable. If you really believe in fate and if you both wanna leave this matter to ALLAH so leave this matter for HIM and you take your self out of this relation as soon as possible.

    Leaving someone like this is hard but you are confused as well thats why you posted your question here cuz your heart says to hold and mind says to leave... Listen to your mind and leave. There is nothing good for you.

    What are you? I mean are you a student or any profession? If a student busy your self in studies and friends but be careful for the friends. Be careful in every step you take.

    Offer Salat 5 times. And Tahajjud or some Nawafil like Salat e Tasbih in free time. Do some good deeds. You'll find peace and some aim in life.

    Believe me sister, you need to move on i am telling this from an experience.
    Pray for us. May ALLAH bless you 🙂

  6. Whether he's a coward and would like to or he doesn't want to. It's about time to tell him you are planning on moving on and intend to marry someone else since he's not putting in the effort to pursue marriage with you.

  7. Walaikum As Salam sissy

    If he is embarassed to tell about you to his parents, well then you or your parents go and tell them. Then you see everything every single truth would be as an open book in front of you all.

    He is depending on fate ? How exactly some Angel or Jinn is going to come and reveal your relation to his parents ? What kind of fate is he talking here ? Is some miracle is what he is expecting. Well then give me the details i will convey this all to his parents in an angelic form 😀

    He is very Over smart. I am sure his parents must be very down to earth people but he is exactly opposite. Sorry to say but making his parents as a wrong shield he is giving you excuses. The real reason is he himself doesnt wants to marry you.

    If he doesnt finds any compatibility between you both now, well then why was he loitering around with you for 17 months ? That time you were compatible and now suddenly you are not pretty strange !

    I wont exaggerate it more. But move on. The only step i can suggest you is Move On and stay away from all this Haram things and get grandly married with the man of your parents choice.

    I wish you all the very best.

  8. And Ali ( The first one who has replied here )

    Brother, when you were an infant did you fall on your head ?
    First thing are you from Pakistan ? Reading your comment it was like digesting my supper which i had. Ridiculous

    You are telling this sister to stay away from haram things. Jaiz Najaiz you are talking about ? How much Jayiz have you yourself wrote ? That is allowed in Islam ? I never knew.

    She is depressed, hurt, going through a bad phase and you are sending your proposal ? How eligible are you at first place ? 😛

    By the way i am very sure, you wont understand even 0.01% of what i have wrote. That is as expected from you 😀 from the way you have wrote.

    And finally , you have a pious name of the Cousin and Son In Law of Prophet Mohammed ( S.A.W.S) but your actions are like.. .... Nauzubillah.. ! You fill up that blank 😛

  9. lmao he's a coward.
    Give him warnig , if he's sincere then he should talk to his parents about u, If that was a true love , he would have courage to confess to his parents. Belive me true lovers are brave.

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