Islamic marriage advice and family advice

His parents have rejected my proposal because I do not pray


muslim woman praying

"Guard strictly the Salah, especially the middle Salah. And stand before Allah with obedience.” (2:238)

My parents are happy for me to marry the muslim I want to marry but his parent are now not happy.

Their reasons are: 'I don't pray'. What shall I do?

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6 Responses »

  1. start praying!

  2. Prayer is one of our basic religious fundaments. Consider this to be a great opportunity and start praying

    for Allah's sake and the sake of your marriage. Of course they're unhappy, life is difficult enough,

    staying away from prayer is a direct invitation for the Shaitaan.

    Jazakallah Sister

  3. As per the response above the answer is simple! However, obviously there is a lack of understanding here, which is probably why you have asked the question to begin with. It's great to see that the parents are thinking wisely about the future of their son...

    The Holy Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

    "A man marries a woman for four reasons: for her property, for her rank, for her beauty, and for her religion (and character). So marry the one who is best in the religion and character and prosper".

    Read below and you will InshaAllah understand just how important it is to pray and maintain your salat as a believer:

    “Recite (O Muhammad) what has been revealed to you of the Book (the Qur’aan), and perform As‑Salaah (Iqaamt‑as‑Salaah). Verily, As‑Salaah (the prayer) prevents from Al‑Fahsha’ (i.e. great sins of every kind, unlawful sexual intercourse) and Al‑Munkar (i.e. disbelief, polytheism, and every kind of evil wicked deed) and the remembering (praising) of (you by) Allaah (in front of the angels) is greater indeed [than your remembering (praising) of Allaah in prayers]. And Allaah knows what you do”

    [al-‘Ankaboot 29:45]

    Prayer is the greatest pillar of Islam after the Shahaadatayn. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Between a person and kufr and shirk stands the abandonment of prayer.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2766. Classed as saheeh by Ibn Maajah, 1078, and by al-Albaani).

    Prayer is the pillar of Islam. Imaam Ahmad said: Your share of Islam is according to your share of prayer. What we want for you is for you to pray regularly, doing the prayers on time with the Muslims in their mosques. It is haraam for you to abandon prayer, for abandoning it is kufr. This issue has been discussed in great detail by the scholars in their books. And it was said that (the one who abandons prayer) is to be executed as a punishment, as is well known. And Allaah knows best.

    Salaah is so called because it is a connection (silah) between a person and his Lord. Whoever does not pray, his zakaah, fasting, Hajj, jihaad, enjoining of what is good, forbidding of what is evil, reading of Qur’aan and upholding of family ties will not be accepted. Indeed, all his good deeds will be rejected if he does not pray.
    Extracted from

    (NOTE the word used is KUFR = DISBELIEF) ..Please understand that you are not Muslim because you call yourself that, you are Muslim because you follow the Commandments of Allah swt. We as Muslims have been commanded to pray 5 times a day.

    Do not take abandoning your prayer lightly. It is a great blessing to you that your proposal was recjected because maybe it will make you think of your actions/lack there of. And contemplate on what it means to be a Muslim. InshaAllah

    May Allah swt Protect us from the evils of ourselves, and guide us to His Pleasure..Ameen

  4. PRAY! Im sorry dear sis but I cannot say the reason they have given (if genuine) is not good. Prayer is the first thing we will be asked about on yawmul qiyamah and with or without this guy as your husband you should be praying dear sis.

    Allah swt is opening the doors for you. So dear sis start praying. (Dont start with sunnah just try to do fardh) If you are really struggling to do fardh start with two salat a day (definelty do asr daily) and make the intention to build up every few days (DONT just think its ok to do two salat) until you reach all 5 salat.

    I know it will be hard, but its SOO important dear sis, and it will get easier. Please dont turn away from this sign Allah swt has given you. When u start praying properly sis, your life will InshaAllah change. (Mine did!) Things bothered me less, I was a lot stronger.

    Remember sis as well that Allah swt does NOT need us! Worshipping Him does not make Him greater. He is The greatest, irrespective of whether we worship Him or not. WE NEED to worship Him! The day of judgment is coming whether we like it or not dear sis and we can either prepare for it and do well, or stick our heads in the sands and hope we dont get "hit by the storm". Of course we will be questioned, prepared or not.

    Prayer is also a blessing. So begin by praying. And over time when u feel more confident, try to learn more about salat - like the meaning of what u say in salat etc.. For now concentrate on doing it. Sorry for the long post dear sis - i just want to stress its so important - Allah swt created us and gave us so many blessings. Prayer should be a reminder of our akhirah -an our goal for jannat. I want to add a hadith:

    The Prophet once asked his companions: “Do you think if there was a river by the door and one of you bathed in it five times a day; would there remain any dirt on him?” The Prophet’s companions answered in the negative. The Prophet then said: “That is how it is with the five (daily) prayers; through them God washes away your sins.”

    Im sorry for the long post - I feel very strongly about salat as several relatives and family members of mine dont pray which is so frustrating, despite us encouraging them. Some of them SubhanAllah have had so many signs they should pray-so many things going wrong as well- but they just dont! Please pray for them to be guided to salat brothers and sisters. Ameen

  5. To be honest, if i was the parent of the man you're trying to marry, and i knew that you dont pray, i would reject you in a heart beat.....i dont mean to be mean, or brutally honest, but let's be real here "al slatu Emad al deeeeeen", if you lack such an important element of Islam then you have to ask your self, what exactly does your faith STAND on.To be honest, i think you should forget about marriage all together in the mean time sis, and just focus on improving your relationship with Allah, that way inshallah you will be more of a suitable wife, a good role model and mother to your children. I do applogize if i am being too hard on you, and i dont mean to pass judgement, but this matter right here CAN NOT be sugar coated.

    may Allah bless you and good luck

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