How do I propose to her?
Engagement and Marriage
I have loved a girl for the last two years. This is the third Ramdhan, because it all started in Ramdhan 2012. I cannot even express my feelings to her.
I want to know is it permisible in Islam to love someone and marry them? Also tell me how I can get married to her. May I tell her parents, or my parents? Or directly propose to her? And if she says no, what can I do? I want her anyway.
Please help me. I love her a lot. Astagfirullah, even more than Allah s.a.w, may Allah forgive me.
-Alone
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Salaams,
I am just going to briefly answer your questions. There is nothing wrong with falling in love with someone, but it is important that you don't spend too much downtime obsessing over your feelings. You have to move foward and try to pursue marriage, as you've said.
The first thing you should do is talk to your parents about it. Then they can act on your behalf and talk to the girl's parents and see if it's something she's looking for at this time. If she is, then they can make arrangements for you all to have a formal meeting, at which time she can get to know you to decide if she feels compatible with you or not.
If she decides she's not interested and turns you down, you have to accept that and move on. Hanging on to someone who doesn't like you not only won't change the situation, but it will only make them feel more negatively toward you. It's better to end the correspondence with a positive orientation than bad feelings.
Please know that if things don't work out with her, there is still someone who it will work out with whom you will like just as much in shaa Allah (if not more). You're young, and there are so many people in the world looking for love too. You just have to be patient for the right person at the right time.
-Amy
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Salam,
Amy said it best...begin with speaking with your parents. The best of luck to you.
Salam