Islamic marriage advice and family advice

How long does Allah take to hear us if we are true from heart?

Hands raised in dua

When does Allah answer duaa?

There is a guy I am in love like forever. For some trivial reasons we got apart.. it was from his side & he is adamant not to come back even though he loves me as much as I do.

In my every prayer when I pray for all of my known & unknown faces.. I want the only thing that is, even if he is not the right one for me. May Allah makes him understand how much we belong to each other & he comes back before it is too late.

It is like I am living with my life for people cares for me like my family & relatives & others but I do not know what to do sometimes. It is so blank inside me.

Believe me.. we had a really pure relationship & I only have trust upon Allah that he'll bless me with my other half (that is how I feel for him deep inside myself) again... but sometimes I really feel helpless again.  It has been four months.  How longer do I have to wait? I want to keep patient but it is hard when you lose yourself time to time.  Please help me replying this.

May I pray with any special dua? Oh only if I knew that I'll get him back again & follow the holy path together.

May Allah bless you all.


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66 Responses »

  1. As-salamu alaykum sister. There is something you need to understand and accept: you cannot control anyone else in this life. You cannot dictate anyone else's actions. You can only decide your own actions and responses. If you are praying to Allah to make this man love you and come back to you, you are wasting your time. You are trying to use Allah to control this other man, and it doesn't work that way. Instead you should be praying for inner peace, to be able to accept what has happened and move on with your life.

    You say you want him, even if he is the wrong one for you. Do you really think Allah would answer such a prayer positively? You asked how long you must wait. In this case, maybe forever.

    There's nothing wrong with praying to Allah to bring you your other half, but Allah is the one who will decide who that is, not you.

    I don't mean to be cruel, but you need to wake up. I realize that your split has been painful. Now it's time to move on. Focus on your own life. Work on your prayers, reading Quran, praising Allah. Work on your personal development in every way. Try to be healthy mentally, emotionally and physically. Get involved in activities that are enjoyable and productive. In time, this will attract the one who is truly meant for you, Insha'Allah.

    • Being practical can help u !

    • May Allah open his eyes and reunite the two of you together. May he come back to you sincerley and may you be happy forever together.

      • Can someone answer my questions,
        please i am not trying to be rude, so answer me positively(without being mean and straightforward)

        the question is:

        Q: Can love be controlled by Allah? Do i possess no feelings? Is my life and future already decided? Do my desires hold no value? Can what i wish come true?

        i have been told by my elders ( yes, i am still very young) , that if you wish for something and pray for it out of your feelings and desires , then it will come true , even if there is some bad in it , Allah almighty will favor the good in it more than the bad and make it come true , so far these words gave me hope, but after reading the reply s and comments on this webpage my heart and sprite is broken. So can some one answer my question positively , i would really like some answers. Thank you.

        but please don't answer me, if it is against my favor.

        • You are not a robot. Allah has given you free will. You are in control of your own emotions and actions. Your own desires and wishes do matter, of course, especially inasmuch as you work to make them reality. And of course dua' can have profound effects on our lives and outcomes.

          Without knowing more about what you are asking, I cannot provide further guidance. I suggest you register and submit your question as a separate post.

          Wael
          IslamicAnswers.com Editor

          • Yes dear sir, and thank you, the words you have spoken above hold great value to me. I will try to register and post my question. thank you.

  2. Salam

    sister Im in the same satuation as u and I've been waiting for 2 and half years but still nothing happens.
    as brother wael says don't wast ur time anymore just forget him and move on I know it's very difficult but
    we have to do it. thx brother wael ur advice woke me up I'll remember ur words.

  3. Bismillahi Rahmani Rahim

    Salaam Alaikum wa Rahmatullah

    You do not tell us your age, but you sound like a young person in the full throes of infatuation. I think that you are so emotionally involved that you are not thinking clearly, because, as Wael commented above, if you know he is not a good man for you, why would you ask Allah for him and think that He will answer?

    Allah created us and He also created the rules for us to live by. One of those rules is that there should be no casual mixing between unrelated men and women. When we are not strict in this, we see men or women around us, and we look, and look again, and chat, and talk, and message and text, all "innocently" but all leading to becoming attracted without really knowing the values of the other person. Then, it is too late. We are caught in the web of "love" and want that person, even if he is a liar or a thief or a disbeliever. We make excuses and we forgive behavior we would never accept if we were thinking rationally. THIS is due to our emotions overwhelming our common sense.

    What I am asking you to do is very hard, but you can do it. Try to step back from your emotions and look at this in the cold light of day. If you saw this man for the first time and someone asked you about him, what would you want to know? Does he pray, fast, and give zakah? Does he have permissible income? Does he respect women and love and cherish his family? Is he a person one can build a life with, or only a handsome guy who knows sweet words? If you cannot answer these questions, you do not know him at all. You have to answer these questions. The correct way would be to have your wali, your guardian, check him out. That would be your father if he is Muslim and is living. Then, if you determine that he is a basically good person, then you have to look at yourself. Are YOU praying, fasting, and fulfilling your duties to Allah? Allah will not answer the du'a of a person who is not praying, whose work is not permissible, who disobeys Him. Separate from your situation with this young man, you have to make sure you are in a good place as a Muslimah so that you can be a good candidate as a wife for anyone, not just him.

    Now, with the situation as it exists, I advise you to do this. You should evaluate yourself and everything you think you know about this man If you truly think he is a good Muslim and a good person, and you want to spend the rest of your life with him, you can write a decent letter that tells him that you would like to marry him and that you do not want to do the haraam, but the halaal. Don't be overly emotional, and don't make it long. But send it to him, and tell him you expect a reply, and that if he does not contact you, you will take that as a 'no' and will banish him from your life and go forward, rather than being a slave to uncertainty. If he answers yes, then do not hesitate to marry so that you will not be tempted to fall into the haraam again.

    If you find that he is not a good person and will not be a good companion for you, you have to have faith that Allah will help you get through this test and that He will send you a better candidate down the line. True belief lies in giving up what is forbidden for the sake of Allah. If this man is not good for you, you have to accept that and get on with your life, give up on a dead end, and open your mind and heart to the fact that there is a better man out there for you somewhere. This is a test from Allah, and if you fail in this you can ruin your life. If you succeed you will become a stronger person and a better Muslmah. Remember that Allah does not burden us with more than we can bear, and endurance and patience is a trait of the Muslims. And Allah knows best.

    Fi Aman Allah,

    Sister Noorah,
    Editor, Islamicanswers.com

    • Aoa,
      Sister Noorah Thankyou so much for posting this reply....I was facing kind of same prob this girl is facing but after reading all you have said i now have a clear picture of what i have to do with my life next.......thanks alot 🙂

  4. salaam,
    its very difficult for me to believe that my mother is no more its been only 40 days since gone to almighty Allah. canot allah listen to our prayers and give back life to the the dead as mentioned in the Quran and send them back to us we need them? If we want to see or talk to your mums soul is it possible?

    • Sha, sorry to hear about your loss. Our mothers are the dearest people to us in the world and it's very hard to lose them.

      However, when Allah speaks in the Quran of bringing the dead back, He is referring to the Day of Judgment.

      The best thing you can do for your mum now is to do good in this world. She will receive barakah (blessings) in her afterlife from the good that you do in her name. You can go to Hajj and dedicate the blessings to her. You can donate to Islamic causes, sponsor an orphan, etc. And of course you can make dua' for her every day, for Allah to have mercy on her and accept her in Jannah.

  5. there is a guy whom i love like anything.... but we had a break off from his side...i am still in love with him.. hes a very nice person.. he prays, fasts...respects women... i had been praying to allah taala so that i would get him back again.. i won't have an affair but he would simply talk to me like a friend but at last we would get married.... i cant think of my life without him... but it seems i am not getting positive response from allah...inspite of waiting and praying patiently for about 9-10 months...

    • Don't say that you are not getting positive response from Allah Swt. Maybe you need to realize the ONLY one kn this life and hereafter and Ever who's help you will get is ALlah and just turn to Him and do not complain to anyone else about your situation Just to God. tHe dua a servant makes to ALlah is between the servant and GOd alone so have faith in GOd cause this life is a test and be patient CAuse God is with the ones who remember, praise, glorify Him through HIs beautiful names and the QUran and through prayer. And fasting. SImply have faith in GOd because HE is the ONe, the only One whom anyone can trust. rEmember GOd does care about you, do not be sad when HE does not answer your dua immediately HE is most likely preparing something better ....

  6. Allah hears every dua tat is made to him. Instead of praying for him comin bak to u, pray for u moving on. It does seem like ur very young. Allah sometimes doesn't answer prayers that may harm u, instead u might get something else in return, u might not notice it, but surely no prayer goes in vain.

  7. Salaams,

    Allah hears all our duas but sometimes the answer is no. Many times brothers and sisters have advised on this site to various queries that the thing or person we want is not good for us and thus praying for that is of no help or benefit.

    It is better to ask Allah to guide you rightly and give you the good of this world and the hereafter. Pray to Allah that he removes all thoughts of this person from you so that you may focus properly on your worship of Allah and on worldly affairs that will do you and others good.

    I used to pray that my husband would come back to me even though I knew he was an absolute waste of space. He doesn't even have the remotest interest in our two young daughters and got a passport out of me. When I started reading the posts on this site, I thought to myself how I'm much better off and that how my 'suffering' paled into insignificance compared to others.

    We also cannot put a deadline on Allah's response to us. It may well be that Allah has already responded to a dua by way of a sign. It's just that it's not the answer we want to hear at the time.

    Some people who are so pious may wait a lifetime for an answer to their prayers. In any case, we have to strive to see beyond these trials and get on with life.

    Regards,

    Hopeful

  8. thanks 4 all ur responses... but wanna ask u guys when we need a person so badly even then allah wont make him come back again??? if its pre decided that everything will happen according to allah's wish n nothing can change our destiny then y should we pray?? and if u all say that allah answers every prayer then why cant he make tht guy come back to me...when i cant think nething without him...
    if allah is not gonna make tht guy to be mine .... then after this m nt at all gonna ask anything to allah again in future no matter how bad allah do to me...

    and i think nothing can be more worst to me except for snatching this guy from me.... i really dont know how will i survive without him... i just wake up every morning with the hope that might be allah would grant my wish today but the only thing which i face is disapiontment.. plzzz help me... i cant afford to lose this guy...plzzzzz

    • Salaams,

      What you are saying is utterly wrong. Who is this guy you are pining over? Can he sustain your existence or prevent your death? No of course not. Only Allah is the Sustainer of us all.

      As I said, Allah hears all our prayers but sometimes the answer is no. This is your test but you are failing it. You are destroying yourself over some worthless human being and destroying your own faith in Allah. How can you say you will not bother to ask Allah for anything again?!

      You need to accept things and get on with life. The guy obviously doesn't care about you, maybe he's married with someone else by now. You want him back but you haven't done things rightly. You haven't been patient. Infact you sound like a spoilt brat. You can't go about demanding Allah give you want you want or else you won't give your time to Allah. Remember Allah doesn't need our prayers but we need and have to pray to Allah.

      When people despair, they lose the way.

      Think beyond some dead end romance

    • Hello!, I am a newly revert and was browsing "when will answer my prayer" and I stumbled upon this site. First of all, try reading a book called " THE GAME OF LIFE AND HOW TO PLAY IT'' . Secondly, you may think you love this guy but Allah knows best; if Allah was to grant you this man and it turns out that he starts beating you; cheating on you and even gives you diseases; you may say " WHY DID ALLAH ALLOW THIS TO HAPPEN TO ME''. So don't blame Allah, he definitely has your better half somewhere along the road but do not expect to get this better half while you are still pleading for the ex.
      In the game of life and how to play it, there was this woman who was having problem with her husband and all she will do is complain how munch she hates him. And then one day this guy told her the following:

      Never accuse a situation or complain about your husband, everyman is a blessing in his own way. You need to bless your husband and the situation and soon it shall all be resolved. So she got up one morning and said," DEAR GOD! EVERYMAN IS A BLESSING IN HIS OWN WAY, PLEASE! IF THIS ONE IS FOR ME, BLESS HIM AND MAKE HIM MINE AND IF HE IS NOT, BLESS HIM AND MAY HE HAVE ALL HIS SUCCESS." Two week later, the man moved out and soon after the woman met this guy she is now happily married to.

      I want for you to get up in the morning and say your salaahs ,then the say "DEAR GOD! EVERYMAN IS A BLESSING IN HIS OWN WAY, I LOVE THIS GUY , PLEASE! IF THIS ONE IS FOR ME, BLESS HIM AND MAKE HIM MINE AND IF HE IS NOT, BLESS HIM AND MAY HE HAVE ALL HIS SUCCESS AND BLESS ME WITH MY BETTER HALF WHICH YOU HAVE PRESERVED FOR ME".

      Trust me when I tell you, if that was your divine soul mate, Allah would have answer you. But i am sure he is waiting for you to accept the past and receive what he has preserved for you..

      May Allah Bless you with your divine soul mate soon.

      • I like your post, Fatimah. There is intelligence in what you have written, and it is wise advice.

        However, why do you assume that everyone has a pre-destined spouse waiting for them in this world? I know so many women, myself included, who have tried to find spouses, who have loved and lost men who were not right for them, all with the promise from friends and family that their real soul mate was just around the corner. So where is he? lol. I spent my 30's listening to everyone who said that my soul mate will present himself shortly. But in retrospect, now that I look back with the wisdom of a 40-year old who is still single and who may enter menopause next year, in two years, or in 5 years (who knows?), I'm not sure if that was the right attitude to convey to me. I can't tell you what the solution is, but I can say that as a muslim woman living in the west, it is unlikely that a soul mate will present himself despite everyone's prayers for me.

        • As'salaamu alaikum sister,
          How are you? I read your post and made a special duaa for you. 🙂 May you be married to a wonderful man soon, and have children, and so so happy. And even, may you get your soulmate so that truly you can never despair of Allah's mercy.
          With love ((and all seriousness 🙂 (I'm a single Muslimah entering my 30s soon)),
          your sister in Islaam,
          Habiba

    • Allah helps those with patience..no matter how long it takes the more patience u have the more proud allah will get dont give up so easily..allahs testin u and wants to see how much u trust him.. and wat u want is allah to fulfill ur desires.. then ask urself this..do u fulill his desires? if u do them great just have patience and allah(swt) will grant all of your wishes.and if u dont them theres the answer!:).trust me he grants my wishes really quick because i have patience and i trust him. i follow his ways and i have full trust and a perfect life! so dont lose hope so quickly.. allah will surely help u:)

  9. Salam.... I'm going to keep this short and simple, Allah swt listens to every prayer you make, if u believe this guy is bad for u or have one little doubt then it won't happen, however if u believe u will be happy with him then Allah swt will answer your prayer. I am in the same situation and all I can advise u to do is pray Surah Istikhara, if you get a good sign from Allah swt then carry on praying for it to happen BUT if you do not then carry on praying for your khair. It seems like u love this guy alot and who are we to judge. Allah swt may grant your dua in 1of 3 ways, either YES you will get what u want, YES you will get what u want but not now because Allah swt is testing your patience and your faith or YES Allah swt will give u better in the hereafter or has something better in store for you. Realise Allah swt never says NO! So carrying on praying, carry on asking Allah swt, carry on being positive and have patience! and believe me you will get what u want. Nothing is sweeter than patience and Allah swt loves to see his servants obey him and have faith in him. so pray and watch for yourself. You will look back on this day and laugh at everything, inshaAllah it works out, il pray for u and pray for me too.... Xx

  10. Salaam everyone,

    I would like to say keep trust in Allah SWT because HE can do anything HE wills. HE can make impossible possible. Things that we can never ever think of HE can do those. Answering our prayers is not anything major for him. Like sister Mariam said HE is testing our patience and we need to be patient. No matter how horrible things look just keep on thinking positive.

    Hopeful....I disagree with whatever you said. The world revolves around hope. If people give up and think oh this is not going to happen every person will give up on duaas. There is delay in Allah's response but NEVER a NO!!! Whatever we want to need to ask Allah SWT as HE is the giver, HE can not see his servants suffer. The delay is probably because the right time is not here for your duaa to be answered. And this is the time to test you patience, faith and to make you strong. Everything is there for a good reason.

    Brothers and sisters please don't give up on duaa. You never know when it will be fulfilled.

    Please remember me in your duaas too.

    • Salaams,

      You are entitled to disagree by all means. However, I am going by that, where we like something that is not good for us and Allah knows best. The thing one desperately wants may not be good for the person. Thus the answer would be no to that persons request, since it is not good for them, even though at that time the person can't realise it.

      I didn't outright suggest that one should give up hope. However, one cannot delude oneself with false hope. Can a person waste a lifetime pining for someone or thing that is not meant to be?

      The only thing to do is to pray to Allah to either expediate a reunion if it serves to do the person good or otherwise pray that Allah enables one to move on. Or at least in the meantime, whilst excercisng patience, for this problem not to take over one's life. There is no benefit to putting one's life on hold and falling into despair.

      At the end of the day, one has to know details of a situation in order to advise whether or not to give up on a matter. One has to be realistic at the same time.

      It matters how you behave when undergoing hard times and that is the test.

      Regards

      Hopeful!

  11. salaam,
    m really moved by amir's response... can u suggest me some special dua or something which could make more chances of my prayer being accepted... well, my problem has been discussed in my previous responses... if u want, you can go through it... plzzz do help me... i really cant afford to lose him...

  12. salaam,
    mariam as you told me in your previous response that you are in the same situation... so may i know i mean if you dont mind telling it to me...that inspite of your prayers, duas did you get a positive response for your problem....??

  13. A/S
    Sister Noorah what if that person reaches all the categories that you have described e.g naik, shareef, perfrm 5 times pray and everything that is required to do islam?

    i am just 20 years old and i am going through the same situation but i dont pray like give me that person if he is even wrong for me..
    i just pray from Allah talah that * i have left everything on YOU. Its YOU who had given me this person with this beautiful feeling that we call love, I know i did wrong to choose that one for me before marriage and i have to bear this pain because of this mistake that i made , But my feelings are pure. I love the person because he has become so religious mAshAllah and helped me change my life. So with my positive prayers and energy if you Think that he is good for me * so mein apsay uska sath mangti ho0n bakis sab kuch apkay supurd*.
    although that person is getting married to some other girl but my heart says that he will come back maybe its not gonna happen or its just an intuition but at least i can wait till thn.
    so i wanted to know is it ok that wt i am doing?
    e.g praying like this n all... or not?

  14. Well I'll give you my perspective. Everyone here has been giving you advice in the religious sense but fail to realize there is a humanly aspect as well.

    Let me start off by saying, I am going through the same situation right now. I am in my 30's as well so no one can tell me I'm inexperienced. I've met many women (in the islamic way) and none have enticed me as this woman I still love does. What makes this woman so absolutely unique is I met her while she was sick. This poor woman had a lot happen to her, including family pass away, friends pass away, and then she herself gets sick and must undergo chemotherapy, very aggressive therapy at that. But I fell for her not because of me feeling sorry or anything like that. No, it was for a variety of reasons of which I would need to write a book to explain. I still pray for her and want to see her happy, even if it is not with me.

    You obviously have emotionally invested in this person. I know exactly how you feel, you pray to Allah, cry in your prayers to bring him/her back, try to do everything correct in your life islamically, maybe even change habits, so that he may hear your prayer and in the end it seems no response. You may even feel angry, sad, and/or betrayed. We all know Allah makes everything happened and nothing in this world occurs without his command. Sometimes he will give you good days, others will be bad, lord only knows I've been through alot. Life is not easy, hence the term Jihad, which is the struggle we all have to go through.

    So how did I overcome this, well to be honest, I'm not really over it and really the length in which you emotionally invest in someone will dictate how long it will take you to be able to somewhat be able to move on. Allah makes things happen and others not, and no one really knows the reason why sometimes. But remember what I said? There is a humanly aspect to it. Here's my suggestion, you.

    I saw a quote in another website that states, "pray to me, but tie your camel". You can interpret that in any way you like but the way I interpret it is there must be some sort of work done and ask Allah for the strength to accomplish it. You can pray to Allah to secure your camel but you also have to put forth the effort to do so as well. Let's put it this way, no one ever became rich by sitting on your couch. No, they went out and put forth the effort to do so. Sometimes they even hit bumps on the road in getting there. Donald Trump actually filed for bankruptcy when he was first starting out. Ok so back to my point, the humanly aspect in this is, if you truly want to try and work things out, put forth the effort and seek him. You must be able to tell yourself that you have done all that you can do to make it work. If it was meant to be, you will find the fruits of you labor to be that much more sweeter because you will have endured so much (again that's part of the concept of Jihad). But if it was not meant to be, you must realize that have seeked everything you possibly can and realize that it was not meant to be. Trust me on this, if you don't, you'll go mad. Then and only then, will you be able to move on...that's the humanly aspect of it. And don't let anyone give you a time limit, it takes however long it takes to be able to move on.

    And for those of you that will contradict me, Allah indicates something similar for salat istikhara. People immediately go pray this and ask Allah for guidance, but if you research it, you'll find that he also commands that one "istasheers" or seek counsel or information before you pray it. The best example of this is the marriage aspect of it. You must put forth the effort to get to know someone for who they are, by talking to them, find out if they come from good people or at least have a good heart, seek knowledge from those know this person, etc. Once you have seeked the knowledge and have your decision formed, then you go pray to Allah to have him ensure you have made the right decision.

    I wish you (and myself for that matter) the best...

  15. salam alaikul . dear frieends i have a proble can any one solve it . i have a problem from 4 yeras wat should u do to accept my dua to allah

    • maseeh, go ahead and register and log in, and write your question as a post. We'll publish it in turn and answer it Insha'Allah.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  16. I'm really inspired by aamir's reply. thankyou so much for such words. May Allah bless you and grant all your wishes. I'm sure like me, you've been able to inspire plenty more to keep praying to Allah. amin

  17. Salaam sister,
    You come to realize the people that care for you stay in your life and care enough to take time to make you happy.
    "He's into you but just not THAT into you".
    Truly, if you were meant to be, you'd be.
    Yes, this is very hard at first, it's going to take alot of time. Just I wash you would leave emotion to the side and start reasoning. Because your reason would tell you these things too.
    You can pray for him, yes, but pray for yourself too. You need the duaas more. Apparently he is content and probably happy that he's not letting you know he suffers, etc. But you're still here feeling things.
    It came to me yesterday, somethings we want to keep forever. Like say you got a box of chocolates, you try to eat a few and save them so you can enjoy them over along time. Instead, accept they won't last, eat them, enjoy them in the moments you're eating them, and then feel satisfied, and accept they are gone. =) That's successful.
    Truly, Allah will decide best for you. You can't imagine what is best for you, Just please teach yourself faith to believe it. =)
    Allah provides for everyone. This man's blessings are coming from your duaa and Allah's will. Pray for YOURSELF sister, you need the blessings and strength too.

    Deep love teaches us to love Allah deeply, and to appreciate the love that is give to us. The ways of love are on the same road. Pick the roads faithful to YOU.
    I know Allah is guiding you, I truly know it.

    Would you want him back after so much heartache? Would you forgive him everything? Is it fair to? Is our love that supreme to take all, leave all? Your love was pure and leave it so. Enjoy the beauty of it for once, and leave your heart for a man who will love you more than you could have ever loved anyone. And know it's there, Believe it. Do Not underestimate Your Worth.

    Just ending with one statement my friend said to me: "You're asking Allah for one rose, when He has promised you a garden Full of Roses".

    Look to the blessings in your life, gain closeness to Allah, make your life perfect as you want it, fullfill your dreams and I pray the man of your dreams...May Allah bring him soon.
    And may you truly be worthy of him.

    Faith is existence. And letting a lot of things go to ascend to a higher level.

    Alhumdulillah.

    One of your sisters who went through exactly what you did. One year and counting for me, Except I truly want someone deserving me of me and of my love and I am perfecting myself so I can meet the man of my dreams--because like gets like. Considering I want a man that's talented, pious, highly educated, and worthy--I must myself become like that too.
    Ameen to our beautiful duaas, and infinite thanks to our Greatest and Merciful Lord, Allah, for deciding everything the best for us, and for giving us small gifts and realizations--be it they were people in our lives. =) ALhumdulillah

    • Umniya, that was a very beautiful post. I am older than the girl who posted originally, but going through much the same anguish. Everything you have said makes sense; but emotionally it is hard to absorb! I keep waiting for the day that 'reason' overtakes my emotional side! I am also relieved that you have acknowledged that it is ok to pray for someone to come back, as long as we also pray to Allah for what is best for us. Many people who have not gone through heartbreak can't understand that once the desperation goes away, sometimes praying for the beloved to come back is what gets us through the sadness and loneliness, but eventually it will give way to acceptance of what is. I am not yet at the stage of full acceptance, although I am getting there. It is more difficult in my case because I am 40 and I did not meet someone until I was 39; I am dealing with so much more than the loss of someone I loved deeply, but also the loss of the possibility of a marriage partner, children, etc. In the near future, I may be successful in processing my grief for all of these things.
      Thanks again for your advice. You sound like you've been through something similar.

      • Wa'salaam sweetheart, 🙂 If Allah wills it and you're still following this thread, email me, because I definitely want to be friends with someone with a beautiful faith (and real life experience) like you.
        With love,
        Umniyah (Habiba)

  18. Salam sister,

    I read your question from one of the entries which I posted some time back. You were asking about the Istikhara prayers which I did when I was wondering if I should hope for my ex to return.
    My prayers were answered through someone I didn't know - she basically revealed the truth about my ex who was already cheating on me before he left. The truth exposed itself after I did a few Istikhara prayers and I was so thankful to Allah for showing me the path.
    With that, I decided not to hope for him anymore and that it's not worth it to do so.

    Sister, I'm really sorry to hear about your situation. I can somehow understand the emotional ride you are going through because I went through something similar.
    This may sound cliche but there is always a good reason why the things and the people we hope for so much in life never happened. In all honesty, it took me months to digest this thought, but I eventually realised that there's no point putting our faith and hope in people. You can only put your faith in Allah, who's always there for you. 🙂

    I am still in the phase of moving on from my ex as we speak. Although I feel tons better now, there are days where I get really emotional and I'll break down thinking of the past. But this is when I always remind myself that it this a blessing from Allah. Only He knows what is best for us.
    And I constantly tell this to myself too - "If it's meant to be, it will". Our fate lies in His hands, so just put your full faith in Him 🙂

    Pray to Allah to make you a stronger person, to strengthen your imaan & insha'allah, everything will fall into place.

    I hope this enlightens you sister...

    .hugs
    kayla

    • Kayla, thank you. What I find so frustrating about my situation is that I pray for two things and wish God would answer at least one. I have prayed for the man to come back to me. I have prayed and prayed that he still carries me in his heart and wants me back. I know that is not healthy thinking. I no longer pray for that, but, somewhere in my heart I do yearn for that wish to come true. Second, I have a wound that does not heal. It is a wound caused by him moving on so quickly after I pushed him away. That would continues to bleed, despite my efforts to heal it. And trust me, I am making efforts. So I have prayed and prayed to God that He heal that wound, so the pain goes away. I said to my mother this morning that i have a hole deep inside myself, and I just want that hole to close up so I feel like myself again and the bleeding STOPS. She said "don't worry, your mother is praying for you 24 hours a day."

      Clearly, the second prayer -- the one that replaces hope for love -- is not being answered either. I know I have to be patient. I ask God for strength every day, even when I wake up in the middle of th enight. I have a demanding job that is now suffering. I really need God to answer this prayer, even if my love and all other loves are closed to me forever.

      Its been months. I hope to see a light at the end of this impossibly long tunnel. I just hope I'm not travelling in this tunnel for years.

  19. Salam All,

    I have read all types of conversations above. Its really very very effective for those who really need it and in dicy situation. Specially in case of Allah Ta'allah. Allah is a noor, who gives us strength at the time when we really get helpless from all the sides. Allah is a Ray of Hope in the darkness, and we never ever forget that he is the creator and he can only help us at the time when we get crushed badly.

    I know all this, but still in the tough time, i am not be able to survive any more and feeling like hell. All hope becomes dead. Attempts get destroying. Its very tough situation/time to me to overcome all this and again try to stand for fighting with another bad morning.

    I just get fed up with all attempts. Now praying for something very bad which is not allowed in our Islam that is called "death". I know i should not pray for my death but the situation is too worst for me. very hard time to survive since one year. Its gonna be a Dark Life ahead. And i can see my career goes in the darkness, i am really not able to be stand and get more power to fight against.

    Please i just would like to you ppl to pray for me and say Allah to forgive me for my all known and unknown sins.

    Thanks!!

    • As salamu alaykum my beloved Sister,

      I will pray for the best for you, insha´Allah.

      I would like to express you not with words with energy what I feel, sister the little bit of light that is needed to make the darkness dissapear is so little, and when the darnkess is completely black, the most minimun sign of Light will make the darkness reduce and dissapear.

      That Light I am talking about, is your salat, you may get used to it, consider it normal, but salat is that little light that you mantain in a child´s room when it is night time, during the day you cannot see it, but at night time, comes to life protecting the child from fears. Sister you are the little child at night time and your salat will keep you shining to protect you from darkness, insha´Allah.

      Surrender, submit, don´t need to fight, life is easier than we think, if you begin to tune yourself to Allah(swt), not with your mind, with your Heart, you will see the way, you will see the difference, things of this world are just test to polish ourselves, sister, there is nothing in this world that deserves that you think on giving up, you are not alone in your way, we are here for you as brotherMunib has said, you make a difference in our lives, your Presence is important to us, wherever you are and whatever are the struggles you go through, you are important to us, may Allah(swt) bring Light and Hope to our Life giving us the opportunity to return to the Straight Path when we feel lost. Ameen.

      There are beautiful inspiring readings in IslamicSunrays, may bring some shine to your life, insha´Allah.

      I will be here for you if you need me, insha´Allah.

      From Heart to Heart, all my Unconditional Love, Respect and Support,

      María
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

      • Walekum Assalam my lovely sister Maria,

        I am really very very gratitude to you for replying me.

        Your message is like a ray of hope for me.

        It encourages me a lot............ I will surely try to overcome with the help of these as you mentioned in your message.

        And hope further you will keep in touch with me as a helping hand. I am very happy that Allah gives me a lot of support and love by you such a great brother Munib and sister Maria.

        I will surely follow your tips. Insha'allah!

        Thanks!!

        • As salamu alaykum sister,

          So nice to know about you, Alhamdulillah, thank you for listening to us, if you need us let us know, we will be for you, insha´Allah.

          Sister, you are already feeling the difference, Alhamdulillah.

          Jazak Allahu Khair.

          María
          IslamicAsnwers.com Editor

        • salam Farhana khan..i kind of understand what you r going through. every day week month and year life just keeps getting harder, but do not give up! ever. the only time will your prayers come true is when YOU FULLY BELIEVE THAT ALLAH CAN DO ANYTHING HE WILLS TO!.the delay could be that he likes to hear our prayers...as i have heard it form many people that God loves listening to us pray to him and ask him for things. Be strong even if you got nothing in the world you got ALLAH and tell me what could be greater then that? im not a perfect muslim and trust me none of us are but ALLAH loves us all and listens to all of us. i have went through alot in life cried for nights and days..and some heart break that has happen recently but this in some strange way brought me so much closer to ALLAH. NOW every sadness i go through every horrible past i remember i only pray to Allah with my heart 100% believing that ALLAH IS ABOVE ALL POWERS AND CAN DO ANYTHING. destiny? ALLAH could even change that! and if anyone disagrees with this then you must have a weak faith in Allah because we all know that Allah can do anything can change anything! so if your going through tough times if your heart is broken sister/brother nothing is better then praying with tears and a broken heart before Allah. How can such a beautiful ALLAH ignore those tears? if it is taking to long then maybe we do not remember him that often and once we do he delays and delays either for a "khair" or to see and hear us pray to him and only him....he enjoys hearing our prayers so do not give up! because in the hands of Allah anything is possible. how can we doubt the one who on the day of judgment within seconds destroys the world we humans have taken decades and decades to built.:) pray to him as if your wish is right before you and he could grant it to you anytime

    • Assalamualaikum...
      i've read these posting n i must admit i too been through this; mad, sad, wondering and begging Allah to answer my pray. and a thought strike me at the time a cry reading Al Quran: what the hell am i doing here? i dictate Allah for what i want. He who own us, He who knows us better than we know our self..He who know what best for us, and here we are, demanding things we don't know the effect for us in a long term.
      I have been live long enough, almost fourty years, and so far, there so much Allah have been given me. some of my pray is answered, some is not, some is answered after long and forgotten. But here i am now, with all I have, with all I've been through,Fa-biayyi alaa'i Rabbi kuma tukadzdzi ban?

      and at that point, i try to stop dictated Allah with what he should do or give in my life...

      As human I do have many wishes, and I utter that wish in my pray, sometime I cry to think whether He will fulfill or not, will I always be with the man I love, will he finally marry me, will He kept him faithful etc. but one thing i sure, whatever He will turn my life to be, it is for my own best, n i learn to ikhlas n not to obsesses about what i wish. i try my best to do the best in my life, i often fail, sinned n sad, and lazy..but everytime i try to keep my spirit up

      life is never ending strugle to be better person, but just remember His question, Fa-biayyi alaa'i Rabbi kuma tukadzdzi ban? la tahzan 🙂

      Salam

  20. Assalamu alaykum Sister Farhana Khan,

    Why you lose hope in Allah?

    None despair of the mercy of Allah except those who are astray. I advise you to download an English translation of the Qur'an from the internet. Spend hours with it.

    Since December 2010, I was in a similar situation and I knew the problem was not so big. Yes, I never despaired of Allah's mercy but things were really tough for me.

    I clinged on to the Qur'an, I spent hours reading it. I left even my work hours and kept on reading the Qur'an much and it really helped.

    Plus, I kept Sabr and still do and I made it a habit to learn new surahs, and pray Tahajjud daily, Alhamdulillaah. All this really helped me maintain my composure and get boosts to go ahead with life and mission of spreading Islam with more zeal and enthusiasm.

    My advice for you is to do the same as I did. I used to sit with the Qur'an and still do and ponder upon the verses and each time I would find new meanings, new messages coming out of the same verses.

    Life is short, use it for Islam, make a purpose for your life, make Allah your goal and spreading Islam among non Muslims and reformation of Muslims as the mission of your life. I hope Insha Allah it will help you increase your imaan and strive for the cause of Allah.

    The Qur'an brought sahaabas to Islam, the Qur'an changed lives of millions of people and it can surely change yours too. So do not delay reading it. Start right now, Allah willing.

    The Qur'an has really inspiring narratives and sure to help you or any other human being seeking answers to questions posed by this life.

    When your death comes, see to it that you do not have to ask Allah, O Allah, spare me for some time so that I may repent and do good deeds. Rather be ready for it any moment. Keep your duty to Allah and do not worry, Allah will reward you.

    Please share your worries on this wesbite. There are sisters here who are very encouraging in their approach and are ready to lend a helping hand anytime 24 x 7 x 365, as long as Allah wills.

    Please feel free, post your questions, issues, problems, anything you like to share.

    May Allah guide you and help you and ease your worries and give you new hopes to live your life for HIm. Insha Allah. Ameen.

    Salaam.

    * * *

  21. Assalamu alaykum Sister,

    I am very happy and thankful to Allah that my words have some touching effect on your heart and become a "zaria" for you to turn to Allah.

    Sister, do not worry. I tell you something important, please give it read it carefully.

    This life is a test. There are times when we feel, where is Allah's help? Is Allah really listening to us? and we know He is listening yet we get impatient and ccry out in despair where is Allah's help?

    But surely Allah's help is always near. Without His help we would not be able to live. Allah is the Lord of infinite mercy towards mankind, yet hardly we give thanks.

    I am glad you pray 5 times and used to pray in Tahajjud as well, but lately you left it and I hope you will start Tahajjud again.

    Important tip: If you have a separate room for yourself in the house, you can recite the Qur'an a bit loudly in the room without disturbing other during Tahajjud, this really helps. One more advice is if you know 1 Surah or 10 Surahs or all 114 Surahs of the Qur'an, try to know the translation, its meaning. Once you know the meaning of what you recite you will enjoy a lot.

    Also, one more tip, when you read the Qur'an, you will see Allah giving the Prophet many commands and instructions to follow. So try to keep yourself in that way as if Allah is indirectly instructing you.

    For example, even in the most comfortable nights, I feel like leaving my bed and start to pray tahajjud and am really inspired by few verses of the Qur'an like :

    Surah 73. Al-Muzzammil
    1. O thou wrapped up in thy raiment!
    2. Keep vigil the night long, save a little
    3. A half thereof, or abate a little thereof
    4. Or add (a little) thereto and chant the Qur’an in measure,
    5. For We shall charge thee with a word of weight.
    6. Lo! the vigil of the night is (a time) when impression is more keen and speech more certain.
    7. Lo! thou hast by day a chain of business.
    8. So remember the name of thy Lord and devote thyself with a complete devotion
    9. Lord of the East and the West; there is no God save Him; so choose thou Him alone for thy defender

    Though these verses were revealed for the Prophet, I get inspired by them to stand up at nights, pray and recite Qur'an in salaat.

    Then whenever there is slightest bit of shaytaan making me a it lazy to get up, I remembered the verse of Surah Al A'alaa:

    14. He is successful who groweth,
    15. And remembereth the name of his Lord, so prayeth.
    16. But ye prefer the life of the world
    17. Although the Hereafter is better and more lasting.

    The again Allah says to the Prophet in Surah Al Insaan:

    23. Lo! We, even We, have revealed unto thee the Qur’an, a revelation;
    24. So submit patiently to thy Lord's command, and obey not of them any guilty one or disbeliever.
    25. Remember the name of thy Lord at morn and evening.
    26. And worship Him (a portion) of the night. And glorify Him through the livelong night.
    27. Lo! these love fleeting life, and put behind them (the remembrance of) a grievous day.
    28. We, even We, created them, and strengthened thee frame. And when We will, We can replace them, bringing others like them in their stead.

    29. Lo! this is an Admonishment, that whosoever will may choose a way unto his Lord.
    30. Yet ye will not, unless Allah willeth. Lo! Allah is Knower, Wise.
    31. He maketh whom He will to enter His mercy, and for evil doers hath prepared a painful doom.

    The above verses inspires me not to obey any sinful or guilty people, but to obey only Allah's commands. And it inspires me to do tasbih of Allah at night and it reminds me of aakhirah and how the desbelievers are wasting life.

    Specially for your situation and question you posted Sister Farahana, this verse holds lot of importance. You see Allah says about the disbelievers: These love fleeting life, they love a life which is going fast, quick, enjoying its quick passing amusements and entertainments and comforts and forget Allah and they run so ahead with this fast life and the forget behind them rememberance of a grievous Day, a heavy Day of Qiyamah when their Hisaab, reckoning will be done.

    Then again for you, I would like to mention the verse 28, Allah says we have created them, meaning human beings, all of us, and strengthened them and whensoever Allah wills, He can change us by other people. We may die and new people would come. By this verse Allah says that this life is already so short than whenever Allah wills it may come to an end and we should therefore be quick in turning to Allah. So there is no need to ask Allah for death, as it may be perhaps near, so turn quick to Allah in repentance and prepare yourself for the Day of Hisaab.

    And the next verses say this is an admonishment, a reminder from Allah, for anyone who wills to chose a way towards Him, but we cannot until Allah wills, meaning over and above human will, there is the will of Allah and only if He wills, any person will be able to turn to Him and why so? Because Allah is The Knower, All Knowing and The Wise, in His knowledge and wisdom He knows best, so He brings in His mercy whomsoever He wills and for the disbelievers He has prepared a painful punishment.

    Sister, you may start reading the Qur'an, with translation, which I hope you did. You may go on this website: http://alafasy.tripod.com/ and you may download surah's in beautiful qirat, easy for us to understand. You can download Surahs, listen and learn with correct pronunciation. It is easy. Then you can recite the newly learn Surah's in Tahajjud.

    This is similar to what the Prophet did. He kept on reciting Surah's life long at nights. It also helps one remember them and be aware of the revelations of Allah and night time is best for maintaining closeness to Allah.

    In your sujood, when you do sajdaa, you may do as along sajdaa as you like and pray to Allah, talk to Him, cry to Him, put forward all your troubles, Thank Him, Praise Him for His creation and seek His refuge and Glorify Him. Enjoy your night prayers sister.

    Start learning Surahs from part 30 and 29 of the Qu'ran. Qur'an is masha Allah easy to learn for us non Arabs as well. Not as easy as they find it, of course it their mother tounge, but even for non Arabs, Allah expands our sadr (bosom) to His revelations and we can learn by His will with ease.

    I think I wrote much. But I hope you have lot of sincerity and open heart to turn to Allah and Insha Allah soon you will rise up and shine with your light of Islam.

    Those whose imaan is strong in Allah, Insha Alla can face any problems in life. They can stand any hardship coming their way.

    So work towards making your imaan strong Sister Farahana.

    May Allah make it easy and enjoyable for you and make it a wonderful journey to explore the Qur'an.

    Insha Allah I'll pray to Allah for you and most important is you get a connection going on with Allah. No du'aa is as good as you praying yourself to Allah.

    There is a beautiful ayat of Surah Ibhrahiim which brings tears in my eyes:

    34. And He giveth you of all ye ask of Him, and if ye would count the bounty of Allah ye cannot reckon it. Lo! man is verily a wrong doer, an ingrate.

    So be thankful to Allah. Allah is pleased with the Thankful slaves.

    147. What concern hath Allah for your punishment if ye are thankful (for His mercies) and believe (in Him)? Allah was ever Responsive, Aware. - Surah Nisaa.

    Don't worry sister, things will be fine in life soon.

    Salaam.

    * * *

    Therefor give good tidings (O Muhammad) to my bondmen, who hear advice and follow the best thereof. Such are those whom Allah guideth, and such are men of understanding.- Surah 39, Az Zumar, verse 17-18.

    • As salamu alaykum brotherMunib,

      I am deeply grateful to sister Farhana, her Presence has inspired you and your answer has got to my Heart, Alhamdulillah.

      Jazak Allahu khairan, I´ve been trying to learn the Quran the last four months, and I felt someway I couldn´t move forward, a week before you appeared I began again stronger to try to learn it by Heart, and you appeared well instructed and full of knowledge about the Quran, I praise Allah(swt) He(swt) has sent you to us, I do appreciate everyone that come to this site, but it seems to me you have come in a moment of great need at least, for me, you are telling me everytime you talk, I´ve done it, you can do it, I thank Allah(Swt) for your Presence, Alhamdulillah.

      I thank Allah(swt) for your soft and straight Heart, Masha´Allah.

      All my Unconditional Respect,

      María
      IslamicAnswers.com

      • @Sister Maria M,

        Assalamu alaykum Sister,

        May Allah guard us from the wishpers of Shaytan, his traps and his army that is at all moments trying to lure us in to temptations and inciting us to rebel to Allah's commands. May Allah gaurd us by His infinite Power and Mercy. We seek His refuge and we turn to Him for our needs.

        All praise be to Allah sister. I am nothing more than a mortal like you. Nor do I have full knowledge of the Qur'an. It is such a treasure and long sailing journey to it that I have just put my feet in the waters on the shore. The journey to seek this treasure has just begun.

        I pray to Allah, all Muslims realize the Truth and importance of the Qur'an and make give all their free time and attention to it instead of entertaining themselves with amusements.

        As such these amusements and cultural influences have done good amount of harm for us and our forefathers to stray away from learning, knowing and spreading the message of Islam.

        Khair, if I go on writing about it, it will be on and on.

        Regarding your learning of the Qur'an, Alhamdulillaah, very pleased to know you wish to learn the Qur'an. May Allah make it easy for you and you have some good learning of it.

        Something I would like to share with you about my personal experience of learning the Qur'an is that I did not only learn a surah by heart, but whichever surah I learnt, I applied it in my life, I saw myself if I was among the disbelievers, if I was hypocritic, how much a believer I am and how much I am doing what Allah commands or how much i am abstaining from what He forbids and I still do to this moment, constantly scrutinizing myself through the eyes of the Qur'an. That is best way to learn a Surah as far as myself is concerned.

        I have not yet memorized the whole Qur'an, still a long way to go, but I remember many ayats in English. I wish to learn at a steady pace. I do not want to be just learn by heart all at once in quick time. Rather I leave it to Allah to help me learn. As such the Qur'an took 22 years for revelation to be complete and so, even the Prophet and Sahabas could be Qur'an haafiz only in that long gap of years.

        The success of Muslims was that the Qur'an was revealed and they kept on applying it in their lives along side the revelations along with learning it and so their lives reflected the Qur'an. The problem with later generations has been that we got scholars, we got people who memorized the Qur'an, but the pace at which the revelations should be understood and applied seemed to lack and same is the case today. Application of knowledge is of utmost importance, especially of the Qur'an and may Allah help us do that and save us from hypocrisy of all sorts.

        You may recite a du'aa from the Qur'an, Masha Allah, good for all who seek perfection in learning the Qur'an, which Allah Himself commanded the Prophet:

        114. Then exalted be Allah, the True King! And hasten not (O Muhammad) with the Qur’an before its revelation hath been perfected unto thee, and say: My Lord! Increase me in knowledge.

        I always make this du'aa in Tashahud in almost every salat :

        My Lord ! Increase me in knowledge and wisdom and guide me to the path that is straightest and most pleasing unto Thee and make me of those who surrender unto Thee with a complete surrender.

        My Lord ! Forgive me and my family and relatives and believers. Those who are wandering guide them, those who are sick heal them, those who are poor enrich them and those who are seeking Thy help, help them.

        Indeed Thou wilt guide whom Thou will and Thou wilt send astray whom thou wilt.

        Forgive those who were in faith before us and with us and those to come after us and place not in our hearts any rancour towards those who believe. (This du'aa really helps from any jealousy/bias etc towards another believer).

        Oops ! I wrote much again.

        Anyway, I am happy to see your words that my presence inspired you and I came at the right time but believe me, I am a simple guy trying to live the Qur'an in my life with whatever knowledge I have. I fail at times, I am human, I do act like a hypocrite at times and quickly turn to Allah in repentance, but more important is I FEAR Allah and remember Him much which saves me from falling in to sins by His mercy as much as He wills.

        I hope my words convey some meaning to you, what I am trying to say.

        We all are humans, bound to make mistakes, but astagfar constantly and seeking refuge of Allah from Shaytaan whenever he wishpers really helps, it really does.

        Bismillaah. Begin your learning of Qur'an. Insha Allah you will do it very well and as you always wanted.

        22. Is he whose bosom Allah hath expanded for the Surrender (unto Him), so that he followeth a light from His Lord, (as he who disbelieveth)? Then woe unto those whose hearts are hardened against remembrance of Allah. Such are in plain error.

        23. Allah hath (now) revealed the fairest of statements, a Scripture consistent, (wherein promises of reward are) paired (with threats of punishment), whereat doth creep the flesh of those who fear their Lord, so that their flesh and their hearts soften to Allah's reminder. Such is Allah's guidance, where with He guideth whom He will. And him whom Allah sendeth astray, for him there is no guide. - Surah Az Zumar.

        Sister, May Allah bless you, nourish you, bring you closer to Him and raise you in ranks in dunya and aakhriah and may Allah guide you and save you from the accursed Satan and may you gain knowledge of Islam in depth and spread it in the length and breadth of the world and may Allah make you an inspiration and a pattern for those who ward off evil and make you enter jannah and unite you in to the company of the righteous and give you strength in dunya to overcome difficulties and worship Allah and establish His Deen along with fellow Muslims in lands where Islam has not yet reached.

        I always lay stress on Tahajjud to questioners and here is one more beautiful du'aa Allah gives to the Prophet, a gem of a du'aa in Surah Al Israa:
        79. And some part of the night awake for it (recitation of Qur'an) , a largess for thee. It may be that thy Lord will raise thee to a praised estate.
        80. And say: My Lord! Cause me to come in with a firm incoming and to go out with a firm outgoing. And give me from Thy presence a sustaining Power.

        May Allah give you all you need to live an Islamic life pleasing to Him.

        Salaam.

        * * *

        Therefor give good tidings (O Muhammad) to my bondmen, who hear advice and follow the best thereof. Such are those whom Allah guideth, and such are men of understanding.- Surah 39, Az Zumar, verse 17-18.

        • Walaykum as salam, brotherMunib,

          I take this prayer from you to keep all of us protected: May Allah guard us from the wishpers of Shaytan, his traps and his army that is at all moments trying to lure us in to temptations and inciting us to rebel to Allah's commands. May Allah gaurd us by His infinite Power and Mercy. We seek His refuge and we turn to Him for our needs.

          Ameen to all your prayers. May Allah(swt) make me worth of your beautiful prayers and hopes, insha´Allah. Tears of gratitude fills my eyes while I read your post, I would love every person that reads your comments feel touched the way I am, Alhamdulillah.

          I praise Allah(swt) again for blessing me and all of us, with your Presence, Alhamdulillah. I do understand all you want to make me understand and now I realized I was wrong in the way of focusing my process of learning, you are right, I have done that with all the other ways of the process, but when it has come to learn the Quran, I had lost it, Alhamdulillah, you brought it to Light again, Alhamdulillah.

          Every single second after I know consciously, I am muslim, my food, my air, has been the teachings of Islam, it has been feeding my blood and that blood has fed my body and mind, and I see how everyday, I wake up a little bit more to the beauty of Islam, Alhamdulillah.

          More I learn, more simple, ignorant and far from perfection I know I am, but I trust Allah(swt) infinite ways blindly and through my experience I have seen that maybe in a blink of an eye if Allah(swt) wants it, I can understand something that has taken me a long time to understand, and it has happened like this again with your teachings, Alhamdulillah.

          Insha´Allah, I will live every single word you have said, and the words that are words that are alive, you will see them through me when the time is right, insha´Allah.

          Only Allah(swt) knows how long we will know from each other, but from now on be sure that wherever you are in the world, you have made a difference in my Life, Alhamdulillah.

          BrotherMunib, I began this answer with your prayer to protect us, please let me finish it with your prayer to guide us:

          May Allah bless you, nourish you, bring you closer to Him and raise you in ranks in dunya and aakhriah and may Allah guide you and save you from the accursed Satan and may you gain knowledge of Islam in depth and spread it in the length and breadth of the world and may Allah make you an inspiration and a pattern for those who ward off evil and make you enter jannah and unite you in to the company of the righteous and give you strength in dunya to overcome difficulties and worship Allah and establish His Deen along with fellow Muslims in lands where Islam has not yet reached. Ameen.

          Again, I want to thank Sister Farhana and all the brothers and sisters than have touched your Heart to make you come closer to us, may Allah(swt) bless and guide all us every step of the way. Ameen.

          From Heart to Heart, all my Gratitude and unconditional Respect,

          María
          IslamicAnswers.com Editor

          • Assalamu alaykum Sister Maria M,

            Your post made me very happy and content that my efforts are finding acceptance in the hearts of people and more and more people are turning to Allah and His Word, which afterall was the mission of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (Salallaahu alayhi wasallam). Praise be to Allah.

            And this Qur'an hath been inspired in me, that I may warn therewith you and whomsoever it may reach. - Surah 19 Al An'am, Verse 6.

            Sister, you may show gratitude and thanks to Allah only. I am just a human acting on His command. All praise and thanks be to Allah, Rabbul a'lameen.

            47. Say: Whatever reward I might have asked of you is yours. My reward is the affair of Allah only. He is Witness over
            all things.
            48. Say: Lo! my Lord hurleth the truth. (He is) the Knower of Things Hidden.
            - Surah Saba

            All Praise be to Allah sister, I have no power to make any one hear, it is only Allah who makes the hearts turn towards Him as He wills.

            91. (Say): I (Muhammad) am commanded only to serve the Lord of this land which He hath hallowed, and unto Whom all things belong. And I am commanded to be of those who surrender (unto Him),
            92. And to recite the Qur’an. And whoso goeth right, goeth right only for (the good of) his own soul; and as for him who goeth astray (Unto him) say: Lo! I am only a warner.
            93. And say: Praise be to Allah who will show you His portents so that ye shall know them. And thy Lord is not unaware of what ye (mortals) do.

            Sister Maria M, your posts on the website were some of the most sensible posts I read here, or if I could share with you, when I started to visit this website few days back, I would go through questions and questions, I did not then give any advice, and I used to see if your post is there in the answers, they really made sense and were in clear English as well.

            One thing I would like to advice you and all sisters on this website in general is in form on ayat, Allah revealed it for the Prophet's wives, but it is as much important for our sisters as well:

            32. O ye wives of the Prophet! Ye are not like any other women. If ye keep your duty (to Allah), then be not soft of speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease aspire (to you), but utter customary speech.

            May Allah accept our efforts. And for you sister, may Allah increase you in wisdom and knowledge and guide you to His way, the Path of the Beneficent, Him unto whom belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth.

            Begin your learning sister. Best wishes and du'aas !

            Salaam.

            Therefor give good tidings (O Muhammad) to my bondmen, who hear advice and follow the best thereof. Such are those whom Allah guideth, and such are men of understanding.- Surah 39, Az Zumar, verse 17-18.

          • Walaykum as salam, brotherMunib,

            Today, I found other way of reading what you wrote to advice me and all the other sisters. Brother, a while ago I was scared of what I woke up in someone, I was questioning myself, I thought I am doing it wrong but I didn´t know how to do it better, and I only have you my Lord(swt) I thought, I began to write less, because I thought again, if I want to help people but I get people with my words to be lost, I don´t want to write again, after a while I returned again, but still with the fear that someone could misunderstand what I was writing, again you have answered to me without knowing it, you talked to me about what I was causing in others and the solution, I hope Allah(swt) will show me the way to improve my speech to be able to heal and to help even those hearts that can misunderstand me, without being misunderstood, insha´Allah.

            033.032
            YUSUFALI: O Consorts of the Prophet! Ye are not like any of the (other) women: if ye do fear (Allah), be not too complacent of speech, lest one in whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire: but speak ye a speech (that is) just.

            Jazak Allahu Khairan. I deeply appreciate your insights and your advices, brotherMunib.

            All my Unconditional Respect,

            María
            IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  22. Ws my brother Munib,

    I do not want to loose my hope in Allah but the circumstances makes me weak.

    I know its very bad, being a Muslim i must have a strong trust in Allah.
    And i do .

    I really would like to very very grateful to you brotherMunib that you messaged me.
    And literally your message made me cry...I do follow namaz of five times and did recite tahajjud as well, but from last 2 months i do not recite tahajjud.

    I also know the effectiveness of Namaz, practically it has been proven. But still do not know what happens with me, i am just degrading my self day by day and i am just shocked and scared of my future, what will happen ahead. I am very very much concern for my career as because i need to help of my family. And since 1 year i am just struggling but yet not getting a single chance to prove my skills. And that is for sure, due to this only i m being so dull and demotivate myself. End of the day i found myself good for nothing, trash and crab.
    I am trying to be Strong and do not degrade myself but believe me brother munib, halaat makes me like this only.
    I always want to get motivated by myself.

    Insha'allah Allah will help me and accept your DUA for me. Ameen

    Brother I will remember your words by heart and trying to follow step by step exactly from now onwards. Inshallah.

    i know how much significant the Trust in Allah.This makes our Imaan Strong and determined.

    Brother your words touched me a lot. I will surely do the exact same thing as you mentioned above.
    Hope you will also guide me further as well.

    Perhaps Allah makes you a "zaria" for me to listen him .
    Always remember me in your DUA.

    Thanks A lot brother!

    Allah Hafiz!

  23. Salaam,

    Hope all of you are well. I have read the above posts and think you should read "Happy Go Lucky" a short gudie to happiness for faith in Allah and accepting gods will.

    http://issuu.com/fiza4678861/docs/happygolucky

    Hope it helps!!

  24. Assalamu alaikum...i am a 23 yr old girl from india...i hav pretty much d same problem as some of the girls here... i hav been in love with a guy since 2 whole years...2 years back he was not a good guy but now he has repented and i believe is on the right path...

    (I deleted the rest of the comment. Please log in and write your question as a separate post, thank you. - IslamicAnswers.com Editor)

  25. Asalam walekum brother n sister even i am sufferng frm the same situation i would suggest you to pray read Quran and then try to sms.call him or meet him it is a same situation (where u dnt study and ask allah to pass u which i think is imposible)
    Allah help them those who help them self
    U 1st try to take step by msg callng etc then see the response hope this work and pray for me alswo

  26. Sister do isthikhara

  27. Me also in this situation , he is a good person he offers prayers nd recite quran and have the qualites of a good muslim .... He said that he loves me but he eventually stop texting me rplying my mesges and said that he dnt want to talk with me .... Now i nt knw what had happend to him ..... I ask many time but he dosent replyed my any mesage ..... But now i cant live without him tell me wht to do ???? I will die without him ??? I pray to allah after every namaz that he comes back ....

  28. ASALAM WALIKUM
    I am in serious trouble. My mother has kidney disease and i have no idea to what to do. All i can do is just pray to Allah and be paceint. I am going through a very hard time and i dont think i can hold myself together 4 much longer. I am very emotional. After hearing the news i have been bowling my eyes out with tears. I can't keep strong. i have got a 10 years old sister and a 3 month old baby sister they are both younger than me. I have no one except for my mother. I have a father but he are having money crisis.
    ALL I AN SAY IS 'OH ALLAH PLEASE PLEASE HELP MY MOTHER, WHY DON'T U GIVE ME ALL THE EFFECTS WITHOUT MY MOTHER!'. I've got assignments and i got 2 study, i have family. i need to help my mother she needs rest and i am going the work. I LOVE HELPING MY MOTHER, BUT PLEASE DON'T DO SUCH A THING. EFFECT ME NOT MY MOTHER, KILL ME, NOT MY MOTHER............................................................................. I AM HAPPY TO FACE ANYTHING BUT PLEASE OH PLEASE DON'T DO SUCH A HEARTBREAKING CRIME TO MY MOTHER....
    ALLAH HELP GIVE EFFECTS ON ME. KEEP MY MOTHER HAPPY, MEMEMEMEMEMEMEEEEEEE..
    I cant live without her, she alllllllllllllllllllways supported me and i still want that. I WANT MY MOTHER AND I THINK EVERYONE DOES.
    Thankyou viewers for reading my emotional summary about my hard time.
    Hope u pray for me too. The name is Mysha. I need Allah subahnalas supprt. Help befour its too late.
    Thank you MUSLIM brothers and sisters. HELP MY MOTHER PLEASE IN DESPERATE.
    LOVE U ALLAH.

    • Dear Mysha, Walaykumsalaam,

      I am sorry for the difficulties you are facing. It is indeed very heartbreaking and difficult when a loved one is suffering with an illness, but this is life and we have to face with strength. It is also better for us if we understand that Allah does everything for our good, sometimes we cannot see the benefit, but Allah is All Wise. Perhaps He(swt) is testing our patience and faith. Insha'Allah your more will receive treatment that will prolong her life and give her a good quality of life. If she is suffering from kidney failure, insha'Allah dialysis is availble, of course depending on which country you live in. May Allah help you all, I will remember you in my duas insha'Allah.

      Also sister, do not bargain with Allah, by asking Him to give you your mother's affliction in return for saving your mother. Allah(swt)'s Mercy is limitless, He(swt) does not need us, we need Him(swt). He(swt) does not need to give up anything in order to give, He(swt) can heal your mother or prolong her life with treatment - as He(swt) wishes and at the same time give you a healthy and long life too. So expect good from Allah by asking for only good from Him(swt) and understand that His(swt) Mercy and Sustenance has no limits.

      SisterZ
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  29. AS LONG AS YOU KEEP ASKING

  30. Asalam o alaikum all,

    I got divorce 9 months back . I am educated, i have been trying for job since then but cud not get one..All efforts in vain sometimes get frustrated ,dont know what to do?I am preying to Allah all the time.offer namaaz cry in namaaz but things are not working out...

  31. salaamu alaikum bro.

    (zaraa, please log in and write your question as a separate post, thank you. - IslamicAnswers.com Editor)

  32. Haraam is always going to lead to sadness and despair. Good deeds are blessed. Good relationships are blessed, ie marriage. The only way loved by Allah is that of the messenger pbuh. We have to strive to emulate this way. Instead we emulate disbelievers. Now to answer your question, people these days lie almost all the time to get what they want. Following the way of disbelievers they lie to form a relationship lead each other on, then when they get bored move on. Or they will keep the other person on a hook. Sister ur not a fish unhook yourself and focus on the relationship between you and Allah. Make it a priority to worship Allah as He ought to be worshipped. You can cry infront of people your whole life and u may not even get sympathy. Cry infront of Allah sincerely and truly repent, then see how your life changes and becomes truly blessed. All praises are due to Allah the lord of the worlds. And peace and blessings be upon the greatest of examples to mankind, Muhammad pbuh.

  33. Assalamualaikum. I know that this comment is years later, but I felt that i needed to post it. I hope that by now, all your duas that you made (that are good for you) are and will be coming true for you Insha Allah Ameen. There is one thing you must never forget. That is, that sometimes we may love a thing, yet it may be bad for us, and sometimes we may hate a thing yet it may be good for us. And Allah (SWA) knows, and we know not. All the best Insha Allah <3

  34. Can I say something? Move on distract your life. But there is a chance he will come back the love of my life came back to me in 2 years and he was calling me on my phone for an entire year on the 3rd year we didn't speak and I didn't realize it because it was my old phone. But stop thinking about him and delete every memory that u can for now. He will come back if he really loved u

    • all you have to do is wait patiently he will give you what you want

      • You people are deluding yourselves. Waiting patiently will NOT cause someone to return to you. Even dua' may not do it, because Allah will answer your dua' by giving you what is good for you, which is not always what you desire. The truth is that we cannot control anyone else in this life. People have free will. If someone does not love you and doesn't want to be with you, there is little or nothing you can do about it but to ACCEPT it and move on with your life.

        Wael
        IslamicAnswers.com Editor

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