Islamic marriage advice and family advice

How to come out of tension?

love hearts

Asalmualikum wr wb...

am 22 years old girl and am literally going mad these days. I don't know am like so much suppressed these days . i know everything happens for yr own good...

few days back a guy i can say the best guy I even met or spoke to ..matured polite totally the guy i wanted .we were like no relation like gf bf .he sent proposal to my family .both families met .his parents didnt like she didnt liked my look though Alhumdulilah am not that ugly am satisfied with my looks. alot of things that lady took out .so he backed off and he left me becoz his mom didnt like me..

but next day he cried like if i don't listen to my mom then how can I be a good husband making my mom sad ..then I texted his mom let's meet and clear the misunderstandings I told her in fact sent a video like how did i look ugly .then she blocked me.. still he was little talking to me.. texting me .

he left to america still the last day the last moment he texted me like i respect u forgive me and i cried in shower for you .ok may be his parents didnt liked but I said I will change their thinking later in sha Allah .he totally stepped back dint take a stand .i don't know what his parents said him that he totally left me.. but still he was talking to me like before .

now we aren't talking since two weeks he now trying to create hate in my heart but I know him. i can't do anything now .i can't shout  or convince him nor anybody. i prayed for few days dil se i feel like nothing gonna happen but everything is impossible for Allah ta ala.  i am missing him.Allah knows .please do pray for me that his parents heart turn n he come back it's ok it's Allah's will but am feeling uneasy.


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3 Responses »

  1. Waaleikum salam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

    I think it's best that you leave things as they are. If he doesn't want to marry you because of his parents then it's best to leave it at that. If you keep trying to speak with his mother and she doesn't want to speak to you then she may even find you as pushy. It's best to let him go. You shouldn't be texting non-mahram men anyways. If you are meant to marry then it will happen, if you are not meant to marry then it doesn't even matter if his Mom likes you, you will not marry.

    In all honesty, you should just forget about him. If you want to marry then you should ask your father to help so you will not deal with non-mahrams.

    May Allah grant you a righteous husband.

  2. Salam...This all childish talk ...seriously. ..even to say your not that ugly....All this talk n think is wasting time...Allah made everybody beautiful some more then others but beautiful at heart.You see with proper IMAN you always shine with the beauty of Allah' light ..There are plenty of people out there but my concern is are you ready or is just harmony problem..You see marriage is the next big text.Shaitan will always try to interfere..My questions is are you praying 5 times a day...Are you reading Quran daily..Are you eating dressing looking etc 100%halal. Because with out this ingredients you and eery one else will be living a fantasy dream except you will never catch it....Those who disobey the commandments of Allah and teachings of the prophet will live a hard life ..there hearts will be filled with anxiety worry stress...and no one can help..Cursed in this world for the mischief they create...So regardless of wealth n intelligence. life is like a spider Web ...He thinks he's strong n independent but a little wind distorts it! Be wise and look for a man who wI'll bring blessings in the house....he prays at mosque and talks softly and is very kind. ...and works hard.....and try to tie relationships that are broken

  3. Assalamo walikum sister
    He is not worth it! Even if he says he really like you and yet he listening to his mom of wrong thinking then he doesnt care about you. Its better to stop talking to him completely. Disconnect everything about him. Its going to take some time to feel ease but it will work faster if you stop the connection. If a man can't stand up what is right in from of his family then he is not worth being married to. Clearly his mom's feeling is more important then doing the right thing. I know how you feel. I went through the same situation. After his family rejected me he kept contacted me. And I wasn't healing so I just close connection with him. He couldn't go against his family even though their thinking wasn't halal. It took me long time to get over him but I told myself that he's not worth my pain. I talked to friends and they were there for me and still are. So if you feel unease, talk to close friend and share your pain. Friends are needed in this situation. All you need now is friends, and time to move on. But if you want faster to heal then talk to Allah because he's the best friend anyone can have it. Pray and do zikir.

    Take care!

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