Islamic marriage advice and family advice

How to forget haram relationship?

Assalam-o-alikum

i need so so much help! i was involved in haram relationship, i met that person online 7 years ago, just a random talk i was teenager at that time it was new to me( i never involved or talk to any male person before) things going on. i never met him in real, he asked me for love relationship, i kept refusing for 3 years and never met him as well.

then he got married. i cut the contact at that time. i got closer to ALLAH so so close i really miss that time now, things moving on. later after some times he contacted me and said he need some advice and all we again start talking and i fall in love with him.. and then we met.. i still had my limits and he kept insisting to break that. anyways regarding to this our conflicts started increasing day by day and i told him clearly i can't do anything like that and then he start changing.. and one day he left me.. and get involved with other girls..

i again go back to ALLAH badly broken.. and HE hold me once again.. this time i was too broken but ALLAH healed me and then after few months he come back and i fall again in illusions.. and this time it was horrible.. i got insulted humiliated everything possible.. and i got stand at the point where i started pleading begging him to just be with me and he kept kicking me out and then i give up.. i stop contacting him(he didn't replied anyways).

its been 4 months now i have no contact and 2 and half year when last i met him..and this time its bad.. i can't explain .. i tried to reconnect with ALLAH but i lost.. like 2-3 days it going well then i start feeling empty my Salah start missing and goes on.. i feel like my chances are over? ALLAH hold me 3 times and i go back to him and this time i can't feel that healing or holding.. i am complete lost.. i still feel him miss him even i know he is bad for me i feel continuous urge for contacting him my mind got lost.. i need a way.. i need a light.. please suggest me something please May ALLAH reward you All!

bravegirl

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1 Responses »

  1. WaAlaykum Salaam, I can see that you're trying very hard and Allah wants us to keep trying. You went back to Allah 3 times and you felt peace. Now you may have to try harder and with more sincerity and Allah is the most merciful also is Al Muqalib (Turner of hearts) so keep trying and you will increase your love and fear for Allah. Regarding this guy, You won't find peace with him. Take your mind of him and move on. Ask from Allah swt for He is the best of planners.

    May Allah forgive me and you and all of those who repent. We are all sinners and I pray I benefit from my words.

    As humans we sin. But we are the best of creation.
    Allah knows we will sin but that's why his mercy is unimaginable. Repent. Repent and Repent. Keep trying hard.

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