Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Husband can’t separate from his mother as she’s widowed.

My brief question is about what should a woman do if she's unhappy living with her in laws but husband can't move out due to his duty towards his widowed mother? How can she gather that super patience to deal with a controlling, sarcastic and taunting mother-in-law when she knows that she can't get rid of her before death when her husband can't provide peace of separate accommodation due to his duty towards widowed mother?

These are my husband's clear words that 'he can't move separate as long as his mother is living. it's his duty.'


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3 Responses »

  1. Do you live under her roof or she lives under your roof. Why don't you kindly tell her to be nice to you and she is making your life miserable. Tell her how and why she feels feels like she can say and do anything to you.

  2. I'm not going to give you tips and advice for how to be patient towards oppression and abuse. Because I believe no person should ever have to tolerate oppression and abuse.

    In all honesty, all I can say to a person in this type of situation is: Run away as fast as you can.

  3. Dear sister,
    As per my knowledge, Islam has no concept of joint family system. There's no obligation on a wife to live with her in laws. Please can anyone quote the exact wordings?
    So if you are living with your Mother in law (MIL) it's a good deed from your end (husn e salook). But if you want to live separately then it's your religious right to demand a separate home or kitchen & your husband should fulfill it if he is able to afford it. However, it will be better if you stay with your Mil depending on her circumstances.
    If it's not possible then either you should separate your kitchen or portion within the same house or rent a place near to her house so your husband would be able to take care of her and you as well. You should talk to your husband about it. It's not haraam & alot of families are doing it successfully. It's better to stay at a distance with peace rather living & fighting with each other.

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