Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Husband converted to Islam and is taking a second wife

Divorce leads to a broken home

We could lose our home, but the alternative is going against my faith.

I am a Filipina, my husband and I have been married for 21years. He went to Saudi Arabia because he wanted to give us a much better life. I am a bank employee before but when he got a better opportunity in Saudi Arabia he pushes me to stop working. So since we have a son who was then 4th year so i decided to stop working.

After 4 months working saudi on my birthday in 2013 he told that he has already found a new girl in saudi and they were already living together and told me that he dont want me anymore and dont expect any love and care from him and hes not anymore going back to our family.

I was so shocked not knowing that he can do that to me since its my brother who brought him to saudi arabia and i was so hurt that i have to submit to a psychiatrist because i am afraid i might broke down. after 3 months of taking medication everything becomes normal. He talk to my son and he regularly give us his monthly allowance. actually i recovered so fast because i was really hurt at first maybe because of God's Grace i recovered fast. after 8 months of no communication it was just his son he is talking

He called me and told me he converted to Islam and he will marry his live in partner in Jubail Saudi Arabia thru Muslim Rites. i was again very depressed because I cant believe what he did and how fast he was able to decide to all those major decisions without asking any advice from anyone of his family.

I cant do anything but to accept what had happen so we talk and we decide to fix things over and talk regularly as again husband and wife plus his other woman in Saudi Arabia. On Aug 2014 he fulfill his promise that hes going back to us and immediately after 11 days he went to Saudi Arabia with his other woman. now he doesnt want to work anymore in saudi arabia and he wanted to go back to the Philippines but I am afraid he cannot give us the allowance that he used to give us if he'll still work in ksa. so we again fight because i told him that if hes going back home i cannot accept the girl he marries in Muslim rite because as Christian we dont accept 2 wives. so he got angry and told me that I will not give anymore money for u as my wife but i will only give allowance to my son and everything my son will need.

My question is can he do that? Because before he goes to ksa our house in which we live is not yet paid and we acquire another house and still not paid? So if he will not give me money to pay our house sooner or later it will be taken from us and we will not have our home to live. If I dont agree with what he want to, like to accept his 2nd wife he has the reason to decline from giving me as 1st wife support? So wheres justice here? He and his 2nd wife will live abundantly and me as his 1st wife who disagree to what he wanted cannot demand for support as 1st wife?

I was so bothered pls help because I do not know where to get the monthly payment for our 2 houses. but i cant accept having marital relation with a man who has having a marital relation with other woman.

Do I have the power to complain to any organization of Islam in Saudi Arabia if he declines to give me support aside from the support hes give his son? Can i sue him in court? Pls pls reply very soon because he didnt give us our monthly allowance this June. Thank you.


Tagged as: , , , , , , , , , , ,

5 Responses »

  1. Since your marriage was solemnized in a civil rites, I supposed, plus the fact that your marriage still subsists, you can file with the court a petition for support.

  2. I think you should do what ever you can to get your rights . In Islam you are allowed to marry 4 wives only if he treats them all equally. He should provide for you as well as her equally. He needs to provide for both of you.

  3. Sister,

    What your husband did was wrong and selfish. He is also obligated to provide food, clothing, and shelter to you and your children.

  4. Your husband is wrong and a shame of the muslim community. I am sorry that this kind of man exists and gives Islam a bad name. For them Islam is just a means to reach the end. He is abusing his right. Since he is not living in your country, it seems hard to use court orders to force him to pay the child support. But do go consult a lawyer who has knowledge in this field, give the lawyer all the information in your hand. I hope you will get the justice you deserve.

  5. Sister, what your husband doing is wrong, he should take care of you and your son it is his responsibility, If he claims to be muslim he should understand the rights of women and wives in islam. If ignores you and your son, contact your local imam and and lawyer to get your rights,
    Now he is married to another girl willingly or non willingly she is his wife, if your culture and religion does not accept and allow to live together ask him to pay for your needs to run your family, and give your rights.

    Hadit of bukhari : Reward of deeds depend on intentions, if his intention to become muslim was that girl. Then Allah will punish him, or if he repent Allah may forgive him,

    It is your life, compromise and accept them if you still love him and need him or stay seperate and let him pay for your needs.

Leave a Response