Islamic marriage advice and family advice

We were recently married, but I found that my husband likes another girl

LIpstick mark on shirt.

Cheating husband

I have been married for around 4 months . And 2 months ago I found out my husband speaks to this young lady.

I assume he's been talking to her for a while even b4 he got married to me. Because some of the text where b4 we got married and some where right after .

So anyways one day I woke up and I saw a text saying " good morning baby wake up" I was like wth...

So I decided to do more research and just wait till I got all the dirt on him. I want through this phone and he's been seeing her and had sex with her as well a lot.

I confronted him about it and he said it was just one of his guy friends because he knows how girls assume and get all upset . & it would be funny ! It wasn't funny at all.

I warned him if its anything like that to watch out because I don't like those foolish games. I also took this girl number and saved it in my phone. We stopped talking for a couple of weeks and I decided to just put it aside . A week ago I want threw his phone while he was in the shower cuz he kept getting text at night an it was that same number and they still talk and he sees her as well.

I also recently just found out I am 1 month preg. So now i dont know what to do. My husband also doesn't sleep with me a lot . Only like once a month . He used to at first then just stopped. i dont know why. I am thin and young and beautiful so I have been told so its not my appearance . But I think it's because of this girl he's seeing . Please help...

Thank you.

~ dalooah92

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5 Responses »

  1. ASA sis

    So the brother is not only defaulting your marriage contract and he isnt giving you your rightd as a wife and he is lying about it. I think most women can deal with a honest hard truth instead of lies as we arent stupid. Look what do you want? Confront him without being aggressive or violent and tell him you know what going on. A husband that doesnt fear ALLAH swt is not the type to have. Keep in mind std's as i used to see them all the time in women with cheatinh husbands. You need to pray and sit long and hard and think about this. You have a baby on the way that deserves a stable
    Home with two attentive parenta

  2. Salaams,

    To me, you have more evidence of his infidelity than you do that a male friend of his is making asinine jokes. It's regretable that you have become pregnant by this apparently unfaithful man. Unfortunately, I haven't seen very many people who are as persistent in having such affairs quit them for good unless it's something they really want to do from their own motivation.

    I think the question you have to ask yourself is if you want to raise your child in a household where your husband is being untrue. There is the potential that your child may be exposed to this behavior and the other women as he/she ages. There is also the possibility that your husband may leave you for someone else. Not only that, but the conflict that will very likely arise from the way he's devaluing you is not the type of thing you would want your child to have to grow up under.

    Personally, I would not accept this type of marriage. Even with a young child, I would consider myself (and my baby) better off without such a person in my life. Ultimately it's your choice, but I don't think your suspicions are going to be eased as long as you are married to this man. You said yourself you don't like to "play these foolish games", so don't.

    -Amy Editor

  3. I agree your husband is unfaithful the way you put it sister, open your eyes and see the truth, I feel so bad for you right now because your going to have his child and he is acting like a jerk. I think he isn't going to change some men's just don't grew up and be faithful. I'm married and young I have a baby boy alhamdullah, honestly if my husband did that to much I wouldnt even think twice about it I would leave him because cheating is a nasty think to do and there is nothing worse in the world then cheating. Insallah everything work out for you.

  4. Dear Sister,

    I feel so sorry for you, may Allah help you and give you the strength to do the right thing.

    This evil behaviour is now so widespread, being decent is far from the norm these days. A cheat will always be a cheat. It is difficult to digest how and why someone could be so low and heartless but don't waste your time thinking about it. Unfortunately this is the test many women and men nowadays have to endure and we have to just accept that's how some people are.

    For Allah's sake, for your own health and happiness and that of your unborn child, leave this degenerate. Why do these people get married and then cavort like animals behind the spouses back. I despise these fraudulent types who think they can have their cake and eat it.

    You are only recently married and now expecting and this is how you are being treated! If you remain with such a scumbag then you will never feel at ease, you will end up being suspicious all the time. From your username, you are 20 years old. You do not want to waste your youth feeling miserable and neglected and end up becoming bitter. Our appearances are not what Allah measures us by, but what is in our hearts and if you stay strong and find peace in the remembrance of Allah, then Insha'Allah you can have a better future with someone else.

    Any relationship needs respect and trust and without that there is nothing. You need to talk to an elder who you trust to gain their support and let them know what you have discovered.

    All the best.

  5. Asalamualikum wa Rehmathullahi wa Berakathuhu
    In islam if a husband /wife is cheating in the sense illegal intercourse. then their punishment is stoning them to death .. if they are not married and if they do illegal intercourse then their punishment is lashes .. but for a married person tawba will not be enough their tawba is not gonna get accepted .. but if a husband/wife has doubt that they are being cheated then there must be a solid proof and in islam the proof of intercourse is eye witness 4 men should see their intercourse ..and in case of women 8 women should witness their intercourse this is the only proof in islam rest all proofs like messeges, phone calls ,mails, letters are not valid in islam... without eye witness you cant blame them and if you coudnt not find any witnessess then you can continue with them .. but if they have done this severe sin and their husband/wife are not aware of it ... then remember Allah Subhanatallah is not blind he is aware of evrything and surely he has kept a severe punishment for you .... betrayel in marriage is severe and its punishment is also severe
    May Allah Subhanatalla guide Ummathi Muhammad (saw) on the right path Ameen ya Allah

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