Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Husband will leave me if I don’t have anal sex.

dua before sexual intercourse

Du'a before Sexual Intercourse

I am fatimath from India. I had my marriege 4 years before. I was satisfied wth my partner till now,  and we have one kid. But, from last month onwards I'm worried!

Because of some problem in our sexual life- for example, he wants anal sex.!! But I'm not interested and as an Muslim, won't it be seen as an unacceptable act in Islam???

I remember the instruction from Allah to wives to obey to their husband in all except in anal sex.

My husband is angry to me now, and he will even try to avoid me and find a new partner if I don't obey him. WHAT I WILL DO? Really Worried!

-fathimath

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12 Responses »

  1. Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

    You are commanded by Allah and His Messenger to disobey him.

    Anal sex is prohibited in Islam. You are not allowed to obey your husband in disobedience to Allah and His Messenger. The consequences are sincere.

    Give up this husband of your and you will be replaced with someone far better Inshaa Allah.

    I will get more information later inshaa Allah.

    • I am not converted to Islam, but I study it...anal sex is foul in any religion, especially Islam. Do not do it.

  2. Assalaamualaikam sister

    Don't give in to your husband's desire for anal sex. You have every right to abstain from any sexual activity which you do not want - and anal sex is clearly shown to be haraam.

    Maybe you could ask your husband why he now wants to do this act, after 4 years of marriage. What has prompted him to ask now? It may be that by talking it through, you can help him see that anal sex is not acceptable for a Muslim couple, and find other ways to make each other happy. Try to find out the underlying cause of his new interest in this haraam activity, and help him address it.

    Midnight moon
    IslamicAnswers.com editor

  3. Ask your husband, on the day of judgement, would he want Allah to not even look at him... Because Allah says he will not even look at those who have anal sex with their wife...may Allah make it easy for you give your husband the understanding-Aameen

  4. don't do it.......let him find another stay pure...ameen

  5. Not allowed and not a good act with wives, may ALLAH give him hIDAYAT

  6. See! Even in Islam anal sex is a prohibited act. Men want this because of the dominance they get from it. And yes, it defines you as a haraam. I'm American an our men our like this is because they see it in porn! Baby girl,if your man doesn't respect the word "NO", or tries to pressure you against your will, he does not love nor respect you, nor love or respect GOD/Allah. Now if this was me, in the land of the free, I'd be kicking him out the house, happily. Men like that want a whore, do yourself a favor and let him have his whore, meanwhile you upgrade yourself to something better.

    Stay tru to you fatimath.

    Allah Bless

  7. Assalaamualaikam

    Allah's Law is Law. If we are told that anal sex is haram - and it is very explicitly stated that it is haram - then we cannot simply ignore that because of a personal preference.

    Midnightmoon
    IslamicAnswers.com editor

  8. My husband is exactly the same. His anal sex addiction is destroying our marriage. 16 yrs of infidelity. We have 5 kids. Every time he has an affair (for anal sex), he stops sleeping with me and everything i do disturbs him. He stops praying, stops spending time with us, and only fights and complains about me. I told him, every time he cheats on me, he is opening the door to shaytan and ruining our marriage. He blames me for his cheating (?) and refuses to go to counseling with me. He's now married a second wife who has allowed him to do anal sec with her. He hasn't touched me in months. I've lost patience and have asked for a divorce. He's beat me and promised to destroy me and take away my kids. His anal sex addiction is driving him to this destruction. I don't know what to do anymore.

    • You are weak for defiling yourself by staying with a husband who deserves hadd for adultery/ cheating and not doing the BASICS of islam. What is wrong with sisters today they leave practicing brothers due to thier financial status or because their parents are racist bigots for cousins and wbatnot who are more kafir than muslim.

    • Forgive me if i was harsh, for i do not know what your heart feels and the difficulties that are subjective to your mind.., but to me its easy to say leave the fasiq for not praying alone let alone his disgusting habits.

  9. Do not have anal sex . Scientifically it will tear your rectal muscles. Your rectal muscles will tear leading to bleeding and you might contact HIV. The anus is only built to remove and not for something to enter it has no flexible muscle. Sphincter muscle during anal sex might tear due to which you wont be able to control potty and would need diapers. REFUSE YOUR HUSBAND ANAL SEX. Only the vagina is built for a penis.

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