Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I can’t seem to have interest in my wife

Internet pornography

I have serious problem. I am 28 years old. I used to masterbate watching porns and other sexual stuff. Now I am recently married. I don't feel any arousing for wife. When I come near to wife I have strong erection but I lose it with time or when I think for intercourse. When it happens I lost interest. But when I watch any video having female in it I easily arouse and masterbate. I know its psychological problem but how I come out of it? It seems I have addiction to having sex in fantasy or with images.


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15 Responses »

  1. Take a Viagra or buy a natural herbal pill plenty from Middle East online nowadays that won't do you any long term harm I'm sure you're capable finding online?!

    • @Sami ali Are you crazy you offering stupid advise that is haraam in islam. Whats happening to people a pill is not going to solve ANYTHING!!

      OP you need to see a doctor and a counsellor.

  2. OP: When I come near to wife I have strong erection but I lose it with time or when I think for intercourse.

    Don't think too much when you have erection just do it. When you were watching porn and masturbating, you just did it, you did not stop to think.

    Are you scared to have intercourse with your wife?

  3. Assalam alaikum,

    Before you start taking viagra as suggested above, you probably need to get counselling for this addiction.

    If you research online you will find that doctors and experts talk about the negative effect of porn on the brain and how it drastically ruins intimacy with one's wife. Religion aside, doctors basically say that counselling would be required. There is no "quick pill" for this because it isn't exactly easy to erase all the porn images you have floating around in your mind. Most likely, even when you are with your wife, those images will creep up and you "need" them because for your intimacy has become selfish. Counselling is the way to go.

    May Allah swt help you in finding a solution, Ameen.

  4. Salaam,
    I agree with Saba you need to try psychosexual counselling to help you overcome this. But also I see no harm in you trying a low dose of Viagra just initially to kick start things. But don't become reliant on it, Viagra isn't a long term fix.

    • Vaigra is harmfull for health and has I'll effects

      • Yes it does have side effects but there is no harm in using it for a few weeks just to normalise things, whilst trying to fix the underlying problem. By using Viagra he may overcome the initial difficulty of having sex with his wife, maybe once he's gone the whole way he won't need the Viagra anymore. Just a suggestion.

  5. WOW first people recommended breast enlargement pills now Viagra pills whats wrong with you people cant you see your going to put more harm in the body than GOOD. This is not going to solve the OP problem but create more problems in the marriage.

    OP I highly recommended YOU go and see a DOCTOR and get a diagnosis.

  6. It just shows you asian pak/Indian women are most unattractive sexually that's another problem!!! You realy have to dig deep to find you're soul mate so you don't have any problems in the future.

    • wow and your a racists thug writing ridiculous comments and FOR YOU TO FEEL ATTRACTIVE AND WANTED you need Viagra to solve your sexual problems.

    • Sami, I think you need to stop commenting. Your clearly racist. I think you should be banned from this site.
      I hope the editors will take this comment seriously - there should be zero tolerance for racists like you. People like you are not good Muslims, so your opinions hold no value. Go and sort yourself out, I'm guessing your bitter because your not so good looking yourself.

    • It just shows you how unattractive your choice of words are.

      This comment is not only racist, but the advice to find one's 'soulmate', whatever that is, to a married man is completely unIslamic.

  7. The answer is this inshallah is to lower your gaze from everything which is haram to look at. hair, legs, arms, thighs, feet, belly, chest, neck, private part back and front. Doing this inshallah will increase your desire for your wife which is halal and protect you from which is harm. Allah ordered us to lower our gaze for a good reason because in the long run it's only for are own good.

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