Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I don’t want to be here anymore


There are a lot of things on my mind. I'm not sure if this is what being suicidal feels like but I'm just tired. I might have depression and I'm sure that I have some sort of Anxiety. Probably social anxiety. Its very hard for me to talk to people in person because every time I try to my hand start sweating my stomach feels like its in knots, my legs feel weak and I sometime feel lightheaded. Sometimes my symptoms get worst some times it gets better sometime It gets so bad I feel really dizzy like I'm gonna pass out or I feel like I'm in slow motion. It all depends on the person. I hate myself for this.

I'll be done with high school in 2 years and my parents tell me that I need to get married, The problem is that I'm not really ready for that, I don't think i'll ever be ready for that because of my anxiety problem. And If I don't get married than I'll go to college and never get married.
If i go to college I'll be alone for ever and that terrifies me Because of my Anxiety I'm very shy, my family and my friends are so mean sometime they yell at me for not talking. What they don't understand is I don't talk because I can't. The anxiety is killing me.

I'm want to commit suicide after I finish high school. I'm really religious and I try to pray everyday and remember god and try to be a good person. But I'm not and I'm going to hell so whats the point in even trying. i just want to die and go to hell like I deserve. My school counselor found out something was wrong so she asked me but i freaked out, panicked and lied. I did try to strangle myself 4 months ago but It didn't work. I don't know whats wrong with me. Please please please I need some help. Any advice???



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11 Responses »

  1. You have just depression
    Try to do lots of excercise so you should sweat

    Being a religious person you should know life is a gift from Allah and he as right to take it back

    You always think people are making fun of you . You have some deficiencies . I was in same boat when I was in high school . Try to look down on disable people who have more sever deficiencies . Then you will realize you have nothing just self created havoc.

    If you are not ready for marriage talk to your parents. Honestly this is best to enjoy marriage after that worries come over and you can't enjoy any thing

    Try to recite last Aha of Sura Toba " Hasbeyallao...............till end)ten times in morning ten time at night
    You can contact me directly... [Edited to remove personal details]
    Just do little home work what thing bothering you most

    • Assalaamualaikam

      Please do not post personal contact information. We do not allow this on this website.

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      Midnightmoon editor

      • Can you tell me when will you post my submission?

        • Assalaamualaikam

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          In the meantime, it might help to search our archives, as it may be that someone has posted a question about a similar issue.


    • Zubair, please do not post your private contact information, as we do not allow it. Thanks.

      Wael Editor

  2. Assalaamualaikam

    Sister, I really think you need to get some help - there's no shame in asking your school counsellor or your doctor for help. From what you've written, it sounds like you might well have a combination of anxiety and depression. But it doesn't have to be this way forever. There are lots of supports and treatment options (talking therapies, counselling, even medication if need be) available for people in your situation. And, they're almost always confidential.

    Asking for help can be really scary. But think of it like this: shaitan wants us to be isolated and to be surrounded by dark thoughts - that way we're more vulnerable, like a lone sheep that gets separated from its flock. When a sheep gets separated, it needs to make noise and get back to the safety of its flock. We need to do the same - tell people what you're feeling, ask them to help you, and keep yourself safe. All shaitan can do is whisper. If you are surrounded by people who love you, who are aware you're struggling, and you're getting the right help, you can drown out the whispers.

    If you feel that you are going to try to end your life, please go to your nearest hospital's emergency department, or to your doctor.

    Stay strong, remember that your brothers and sisters around the world love you as our sister in Islam. May Allah ease your burdens.

    Midnightmoon editor

  3. It sounds like you have anxiety and panic disorder. These are very common condition . You already have attempted taking your life so I think something immediate is needed to relieve your symptoms so you have grip on your life.
    Religious solution above are good but in addition make appointment with your doctor to get prescription for medications.
    Beta blockers are commonly prescribed to immediately control symptoms that you have described above. Don't worry sister .Your symptoms are easily treatable .

  4. Dear Sister,

    I understand your problem is more of a self-created illusion. I didn't see anywhere how you specified any real reason to be anxious. Any family or personal problem, or education related. Rather, your fear and anxiety is leading you to fail in your other spheres in life.
    These are just designs of shaitaan. He does not just lead us into sins, as is commonly understood, but also into despair and other mental sufferings. When he sees someone fears Allah, He is aware that it is not easy leading him to be carefree, so he pushes him further in the fear in such a way that he has no hope for mercy and eventually does not find any relevance in following shariah. Be warned! you are being tricked!

    I am not saying life is all roses, but there's a saying, "We often suffer more in imagination, than in reality."
    I recommend you to read the book "Don't be Sad" here's the link:

    It's really long so you can read it almost everyday and take months to finish it.

    You can also seek company of pious people, because it is difficult for shaitaan to penetrate into a group of Muslims, as against a lone one. If that is difficult for you, then there are plenty of shuyookh online with extensive lectures upon purification of nafs, understanding the deceptions of shaytaan and being mindful of Allah at all times. You download them on the phone, and keep it playing while on the go.

    Besides that, recite the mauwazatain (Surah Falaq and An-Naas) and Aayatul Kursi. InshaAllah, you will see the change very soon. Be confident and recite the dua in the following hadith continually.

    Ibn ‘Abbas reported, “The Prophet, peace be upon him, at times of sorrow and grief used to supplicate, La ilaha illa Allah Al-’Azim, Al-’Alim, la ilaha illa Allah, Rabbul ‘arshil ‘Azim, la ilaha illa Allahu, Rabbus-Samawati wa rabbul ardi wa rabbul ‘arshi karim (There is no god but Allah, the Mighty, the Forbearing, there is no god but Allah, the Lord of the mighty throne, there is no god but Allah, the Lord of the heavens and the earth, and the Lord of the throne of honor)’.”
    Source: Bukhari and Muslim.

    You will see the effect of shaytaan waning away. May Allah make it easy upon you and instill the right balance of fear and hope. Aameen.

  5. Just wait wait wait and practice sabr. These feelings shrink the more you grow. It's a normal part of life to feel lonely and depressed, you're not alone. Remember life is just a test. So far you might have a C on that test and still a chance to pass and get to jannat, so don't even think about dropping out of the test just because you think you might fail. Cheer up, after all there's only 2 years of high school doldrums left, then on to bigger and better things, compared to an eternity of pain and torture in hell...

  6. Sister,

    I know exactly what you are going through as I have already been where you are with my own daughter. In high school she too developed anxiety so severe, she could not even take a test in a classroom with other children. We didn't know why this was happening as she had never had difficulties before. We visited several doctors and finally found a doctor who prescribed some medication that helped her tremendously. It is not something she needs everyday however if she feels that she does need something, it is there for her. It has changed her life for the better by far. She is functioning and has a full time job and is in a much happier place because of it.

    Know that you are not alone and what you feel is real. The best place for you to begin getting some help is to have your mother make an appointment at the doctor for you. Talk with the doctor about what you are going through and what you are feeling. Together your doctor and you can work towards finding out what is going on with you and why you have so much anxiety. Know that suicide is not the answer. Make that appointment.


  7. Always advice people in depression start counting blessings of Allah. Depression gone.
    fabi ayyei alae rabiko ma tokaziban.

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