Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I know she’s committing zina elsewhere

A. A.

I love a girl and for 4 years we are in contact via phone. In third year I came to know that she did zina with a boy and some other persons and hide it from me. I was shocked and couldn't believe. It was very hard for me to leave her because I loved her so so much and she also have love for me. Spending 4 month I decided to do istakhara and I saw a dream that she is getting married with me. It was very clear. But I was not satisfied how to accept her and also didn't want to leave her. After that I have come to know that if I still send her purposely she is willing that we do marriage after one year not now. I also come to know that she still doing zina at home. Now plz tell me what should I do. Should I follow dream or not?

abdul hayye


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3 Responses »

  1. Assalam alaikum Brother,

    Please read the information found on:

    http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/salat-al-istikhara-the-guidance-prayer/

    Isthikhara doesn't necessarily present itself as a dream, as you will find in the information. It could also be a feeling or it simply could be that you go ahead with what you think/feel is best, but that you have asked Allah swt for guidance and that guidance may come in different forms.

    Back to your situation, as Muslims, we should not engage in relationships outside of marriage with anyone, even if it is by phone. Personally, I think you should end all ties with her, especially considering that she is committing zina as per you (though I don't know how you have come to know this).

    In future, practice Islamic ways of finding a spouse, inn shaa Allah.

    May Allah swt ease your pain, Ameen.

  2. Brother leave her.
    move on, no point marrying a girl who is so careless with her body and Haya.
    you do not want to have children from a body that has been used for such haram things.

  3. Salaam brother,

    Ask her to stop committing Zina, if she doesn't stop doing Zina then leave her. (No matter how much you love her.)

    Also make taubah / repentance to Allah for your wrong deeds as well. The fact that you are in contact with a non mehram is also Zina. So you are doing Zina as well. If you really love her then marry her after she stops committing Zina or else stop all contact with her.

    May Allh stop you from committing Zina

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